A new normal

I quit my job. I no longer see my friends. I am mostly at home now. I do not have the ability to focus long enough to read. I can not walk much and most other physical activity has been been stalled.  I am not sure who I am or what I am doing anymore.  There have been times in the last year that I couldn't even make it through a 22 minute show on Netflix without stopping in the last 8 minutes to take a mental break.

My new normal is .....well....it's just not normal.

Lyme disease is my new norm and I gotta say, I am growing tired of it.  I stopped blogging all together because writing was impossible and there was no way I could read blog posts. Plus, how many posts do you want to read about my pain and suffering??

I have started seeing a new doctor and with it have come some great results.  However, then in true fashion, I push the limits and put myself back on the couch due to over working.  I sit here now needing to get paper work done for our business and attend a rotary meeting at noon, trying to figure out how I am going to do it.  My mobility is limited again due to two swollen knees and a complete loss of energy.

I need to get up, find a dress, curl my hair, and get out the door soon.....I just want to rest. Laying down sounds like the best option of all.  (especially since it is a rainy Monday).

I am only now starting to learn the true effect of my Lyme disease going neurological. To tell you that it isn't scary and overwhelming would be a lie. Anxiety, anger, outbursts, forgetfulness, brain fog, losing my ability to focus, blurred vision/floaters in my eyes..... it has all been scary.

Well, here I go.  Getting up off the couch (with the use of a cane), finding something comfy yet professional looking and going about my day in my 'new normal' mode.

I'm not dead, I'm just offline

After a lengthy chat with Osbasso and finding myself unable to sleep, I decided to look at my old blog again.  It has been a long time!

I am not dead, I am just offline (basically).  I used to be a blog addict that moved to being a Facebook addict who now checks Instagram twice a day and will Snapchat friends on occasion, but that.is.it!

I have become someone you wouldn't recognize and I can't say that that is a good thing, at all.  I have been treating for Lyme disease for the last year and it has damn near killed me. I have gone months without being able to move my arms or leg. I have had to be bathed, and dressed and aided to and from the bed and couch.  I have been forced to use a cane and have become mostly housebound.

My life sucks right now.  But, I am hoping for a turn around soon with a new treatment plan.

My kids are getting older and it is amazing how fast time is moving now.  My oldest is driving around waiting for his permit to become his license and my daughter is counting the days until she moves up to the high school next year.  My two younger boys are growing crazy fast . My third child is so busy . My youngest unfortunately is battling Lyme disease with me and doesn't do too much other than go to school and come back home.

I don't know what I expect out of this post.  Maybe just to dip my toes back into the blog pool for a second, test the waters.

Miss you all

~Jules