So near yet so far. Oh why play such a joke on me.

Whoohoo! IT Law paper today went quite okay I suppose, definitely much better than CMA. I love the feeling when you 'spot' the correct topics for examinable questions! Heehehe :D
But the revision lecture helped alot too. Without it I think I can jump off a building due to info overload, because there's too much info to digest. Felt so suffocated rushing everything last night, with a freaking 3hr+ nap. AND MY CHEST LITERALLY CONSTRICTED, making me have occasional breathing difficulties.

I think the pressure I exert on myself to excel gets higher each year. First time stressed till I feel that my body's so full of toxic, I think way more stressful than my O lvl period lor. Singapore's not getting nice to live in anymore :<

Really sucks leh. So young only so stress. Cannot enjoy my youth properly before I become a young adult meh!! Okay lah, I'm stressing myself out so badly cos I don't wanna be stranded without a degree(die also need to get into SIM). Sad sia, no money to further my education overseas, so I've to fight my way into a local PRIVATE university. Zzzzz.


BTW IM SUFFERING FROM ACCUMULATED FATIQUE. GONNA STONE ANY MOMENT SO GOODBYE!!

In all things, its better to hope than to despair.

"When you've been disappointed so many times, not caring almost becomes a reflex."

Retweeted this quote last night, because it just hit me that my heck-care attitude towards so many things probably stemmed from being hurt/disappointed too many times.

So damn true! It's like the answer was right there in my face, but it only dawned on me now.

I choose to ignore, let myself be immune to setbacks. (learn from it, but not letting the emotional side get to me much). Which would you rather? Carry an emotional burden each passing day, or to try and live your life as happy as you can?
It's hard to ignore sadness/hurt/disappointment, but one can always choose to believe its inexistent.

HAHA now I know where I got my internal strength from. I've become more down-to-earth and become fairly strong in character, all thanks to the jerks/bastards/bitches who've made my life more meaningful huh.

"She's strong because she knows what it's like to be weak. She keeps a guard up because she knows what it's like to cry herself to sleep."

Haters only serve one purpose: They try to bring you down because they're jealous that you're way ahead of them :)

ME AND BABY STEL <3

HELP US CLICK ON BOTH OUR ADS THANKYOU!!

Lost.

HI ALL. I'm having a shortage of sleeep but I cannot afford to plop back on my bed as I've a paper to study for this coming Monday T.T

Anyway, yesterday's accounting paper will be the death of me. Studied so hard for it but still like that. FML leh why always screw up in exams!! Forget to include this column, know the formula but still apply wrong figures etc.
WTFFFFF damn angry. LOL okay I pretty much ignored thinking about the paper right after it ended.

Went for a self pamper, cut + dyed my hair a brighter colour than before. I WANTED FRENCH BLONDE/BEIGE with highlights but it was gonna hit a 3 digit sum and so I hesitated against doing it. Now my hair colour's some coppery orangey reddy brown. Hmmm., Oh, and it was my first time dyeing hair in a salon! :)

In the night, T drove us out to have Geylang's Rochor tauhuey! I think the tauhuey's texture is nicer than the actual Rochor rd one (dhoby daut there). HOWEVER. Their tangyuan sucks balls. The peanut is totally hardened and it clumps together. Damn regret. LOL.

J took a pic of me while I was asleep at B's house! So annoying. He said he wouldn't do that to girls and still did-.- If he uploaded it I would have killed him. Haha

Thanks R for the second batch of Japanese chocolates! He gave me all these after I complained after my brother finished up the other half of my green tea chocs.

OKAY TIME TO CHIONG WORK. BYEEEE^^

Choose between a dog

Was just reading Kaykay's blog - www.kaykay.sg and I found her post on 'MEN ARE DOGS' to be quite hilarious, yet true.

I've never dated 'poodles' nor 'puppies' before, guess I'm not really one to go for cuties.

However, I've dated 'Rottweilers/huskies' & 'Dachshunds' & (small) 'Retrievers'. Mostly 'Dachshunds' I would say. And these bad boys are real good tearjerkers. Yes, I agree with her, do take into consideration the consequences of dating such a guy, because it might only be you getting hurt in the end.

Does everything happen with really no strings attached?

Watched NO STRINGS ATTACHED with Zr & co. after work yesterday! A little comedy with some sexual scenes and a moral of the story. Cute show. I don't find the plot fantastic, but I think the moral of the show is that you cannot be friends with benefits without falling for each other :)

Debate pple?

My verdict would be:  Yes, there is no such thing as plain friends with benefits.
How is it that people are able to have a quick fixie with someone they don't have the slightest tinge of feelings for? The only exception I know of are pornstars. :>

Oh, Natalie Portman is a real versatile actress! Caught Black Swan in theatres a couple of days back, she managed to fully capture a human state of depression in her acting, and in No Strings Attached, she's like whoa, a totally different character in all.

**********************************

Anyway, it's kinda weird that things don't really work out even after both sides have put in effort. We're all probably people on different wavelengths. There seems to be no common topic for us, and I've to say, I definitely feel suffocated talking to you guys because I've to exert caution in my words, knowing you people are quite judgmental.

Anyway, sweet R came all the way down to my house to pass me this! Handmade sushi + greentea flavoured kitkat which is only available from Japan! ^^

& A seemed quite worried about me feeling so angsty that night, he offered a listening ear for a couple of hours. HAHAHA now I feel honoured knowing I'm one of the 3 special ones he calls Princess/beautiful/gorgeous/sexy, previously I accused him of throwing such words around freely. :>

Specially dedicated to Justin Philip Luke

Hi son, this post is all for you okay!
I specially sectioned off this from the other blogposts, so I backdated the others a little :)

First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR LUKE! (20/2/11)

Hope you had fun with our surprise visit! Bet you all thought we had too much fun clubbing and 'dumped' you guys aside right!

Anyway we specially made the effort to surprise you guys, and you guys made the effort to wake up and talk to us even though you were so drunk/tired. greatly appreciated! Sorry we came over so late to disturb your sleep when all the fun was over(drinking etc)

Edward always has his face hidden-.-

Btw I feel damn bad, because I did not reply you on twitter, nor through the Fb DM you sent me. I know you were eagerly looking forward to us coming down, and I'm real sorry I left you hanging in suspense. I had to get my girls' response before I could give you any reply, and I din wanna disappoint anyone by accidentally mentioning sth wrong. I know I seem like I totally din give a fuck about you guys anymore, and I apologise for my attitude. & cos I din reply, I wasn't the one liasing with you all, so I probably seemed the most nonchalant about the party.
I really miss you guys alot, and I hope you all don't get the impression that I do not care anymore.

Sorry about my black face that morning too. I was feeling pms-y and all - read my previous blogpost. That, topped with menses, made me feel real shitty. Felt weak/shitty/shag/tired everything in 1 package, therefore I was so pissed. But please know I was really elated to see you guys!!!

Son, I can tell you're still as sensitive as ever, you called the rest to come down just because I din go upstairs to talk to you guys. You prolly sensed sth wrong with me right? Yupp, I was feeling super worn out, cramps & hunger pangs affecting me too. And I totally had no mood to speak to anyone (stoning mood)
Thankyou for these small actions, it lights up my day because it shows people still care :)

end off my post with a pic of us again! LOVE YOU SON!!

Anyway I really love the time we guys spend together, its such a beautiful memory each time we hang out!! Love that we can feel so at ease with you guys, we can totally be ourselves without feeling suffocated. Seeing each other in our shaggy mama states, super funny!

MWARK!!! <3 HOPE TO CARRY MORE GARBAGE BAGS WHILE YOU'RE PUKING. (Y)^^




Sorry guys, I'd to spam this post with pics cos I couldn't help it, we all looked so happy in there heheehe <3

Must stop my unhealthy lifestyle.

Friday - 18/2/11

Good quality time spent over dinnerzzz at Xin Wang(cine) with Jacky & co! We played the truth or dare game but Jacky was the only guy so we all aimed him. Haha sad life.

Saturday - 19/2/11

BIRTHDAY BOY!

(LOL MAGON DIN WANT HIS PHOTOS UP ON FB. PRIVATE PERSON. AS SUCH, I TOLD HIM TO GET OUR PICS FROM MY BLOG, HENCE THE REPETITIONS OF HIS FACE. HAAHA)

Oooo. This was one good/bad day. My freaking menses had to come on the day I went club-.-
Met up with Magon & Samuel for Sam's belated birthday dinner! :) Magon overslept & arrived late for dins, so everything was delayed, and I couldnt reach PH by 11pm for the free entry. Had to pay stupid 20 bucks for no drinks(paid for vip entry through a friend's friend-.-), no good songs and a kinda bad night :<
But I still love the company of my girls! :)

OH and I freaking saw my ex and a friend's ex there. Hmmm. Many guys there that night. Saw many familiar faces from the bird's eye view I had at the podium. It was okay seeing my ex there. However, it was what he asked me after club night that made my day kind of screwed.

Okay, not everyone probably thinks this way, but my friends have agreed with me that he should at least give me some respect as an ex gf. WHICH EX-BF ASKS YOU IF HE CAN KNOW YOUR FRIEND? Fucked up much? You wanna know my friend, ask her straight to her face or through my other friends? That is the most basic respect you could give me in the least. YOU SHOULDN'T BE TELLING ME YOU WANNA KNOW MY FRIEND AND ASKING ME MORE ABOUT HER!! & WHAT'S MORE MY BFF! You saw her before, couldn't recognise her and now you're trying to pry info about her from me? wtfuckkk. Just makes me suspect if you actually had sth for her while we were together.
To think my gfs actually support you the most out of all my ex-es, saying you were the sweetest and all, scolding me for not lasting long with you, and I thought I had one of the best memories with you. Now you've to spoil my perfect bubble by doing this to me, reemphasizing that guys are quite screwed one way or another.


P/s: Take care of your eye infection L!! Don't wear contacts while you're in outfield-.-

now this is funny, and true in fact! (like the pun involved)

Phad Thai for you Ma'm

Studied with my BBGS in school today!

I think we all quite hardworking leh, ears all plugged with music, minds with great determination, all set to work :)

Doing accounting can be kinda addictive, once you get the hang of it, it turns out to be quite fun actually. ^^

I realised I've been quite lazy to edit my photos for quite some time. I wanna learn PHOTOSHOP SOOOOO badly.

It will definitely help me in livening my blog, won't it? *double grins*

my dinner for tday! Thai glass noodle 'salad' @ Bukit Timah Market.

THEIR PHAD THAI RAN OUT JUST WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO ORDER :<

Okay this is damn basic photo editing. Sighs. Haha entertain you guys abit lah! (DON'T FORGET MY ADS!!! )

Kk off to do my mask and nailsssss! :)

Valentinessss♥

I think I'm super unprofessional.
Stel was laughing at me on the phone last night. Why?
Because blogging is more of a chore for me than a passion, as much as I have to admit.

Some people just have to blog daily, probably because of their passion of writing, or the feeling of penning your thoughts out into words, or they just wanna share things with the whole world. Well, various reasons.
Mine is obviously for the need to keep track of the events happening in my life(super short memory span-as I've mentioned in several posts), and for me to have a 'past' to refer and to laugh about in the future.

In doing so, I always have to recall what I've done, places I've visited, things I came across, events that left lasting impressions in my mind etc.

AND HERE COMES THE BIG PROBLEM.

Not only do I have a short term memory, I think I'm quite the busy bee herself.
Studying, going out, partying, working - all these take up a huge lot of my time & I'm rarely left with personal time. :(:(
NOT MY FAULT OKAY. DIFFERENT PEOPLE DIFFERENT PRIORITIES.
Well, anyway, say... I go out and come home arnd 12+, either I'm too shag to blog, or I've to finish up some annoying tutorial. And if I go party on Saturdays, I've insufficient time to sleep before I wake up for work on Sunday, I'll be a goner by the end of the day, and if my Mondays are rushed, it'll be 3 whole days before I'm able to cook up a post.
BY THEN, I would have forgotten some of the previous days happenings cos of my rushed schedule, I couldn't catch a breather, my mind was malfunctioning from fatigue yadah yadah.....

AHHH, THE PAINS OF UPKEEPING A BLOG. (I don't get paid maintenance nor grooming fees :<)

Okay, rant over. I forgot to add in 'thanks to my fantabulous time management skills'
STANDING OVATION PLEASE? ^^ (sarcasm intended)

***********************

OKAY NOW TO BORE YOU GUYS WITH MY DAILY LIFE STORIES^^

Friday - 11/2/11
Gambled at Mingzhou's house. I gambled small this time round. 2-4 bucks each time. Realised that gambling $4 each round proved to be more lucky for me than 2. 2bucks each round, and my moolah is eaten up by the banker.-.-

Mahjong till I song too! LIKE FINALLY! HEHEE thank goodness I won in the last round and recouped my losses. So my total winnings for that night was equivalent to $1. (Y)

Monday - 14/2/11

VALENTINES' DAY! ♥♥♥

Will just reveal that me, B & S received flowers!! Delivery to doorstep, even before the clock struck 12! Lol kanchiong spider.


Today - 16/2/11
Went for my internship briefing! I shall make the most out of it, wanna be a useful person in the future ^^

Monopoly Millionaire

Hi I'm blogging from NP's library computer!!
Have been waiting an hour for notes to be photocopied :<
So duper long. Some people have to learn how to appreciate good deeds! -.-
Okay im leaving soon, continue ranting when I'm back home.

OH, THE INTERNET BANDWIDTH HERE ALLOWS FAST LOADING OF MONOPOLY MILLIONAIRE ^^

NP YOU ROCK HAHA

Afraid to leap. And always watch before you leap!

Mahjong at Betty's house yesterday!
Intended to study, but plan failed.
But really, the choice of mahjong wins hands down, and it takes great determination to pull yourself away from the table. :X

The guys were damn funny too. They bought 4D, and we all had to cramp in the car just to camp and listen while the 4D numbers were being read out on the iPhone app.
Apparently they bought the car plate number or sth, so sitting in the car gave them more feel to strike 4D-.-

Pantung(superstitious) people really go all the way out to be pantung LOL.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chionged half of the report at sch with Stel earlier!
Super tiring :(
With my parents out of town, I find great difficulty in waking up for school.
2 consecutive days already leh, since yesterday!
School starts at 9, I woke up at 8.30 yesterday, and today at 9. Powerpec much? Unless I live nearby then i can probably pull some stunt(like a superwoman) to arrive on time. But nooooooo, the travelling distance is so shitty!

Hehe, anyway enough of my nonsense. HTHT with T last night, and I realised that I'm pretty afraid to step into a r/s & fully devote myself to someone.
Right now I'm happily enjoying singlehood, and I kinda forgot how it was like to be tied down when in a r/s. (It's pretty rare that I enjoy single status, because I used to harbour the mentality that I needed a guy to make my life feel complete, which made me easy prey for jerks.)


Nevertheless, I don't wanna encounter anymore possessive partners, nor any more assholes.
My gfs & I have tolerated enough nonsense in our lives.
I feel that I cannot afford to be hurt right now, because I don't want to end up mentally & emotionally drained if shit happens. (I can be a pretty emotional person, it's probably written on my face)
Neither do I've time to entertain such childish people - how could I when I've a shortage of time on hand!

It's not that I chose to avoid opportunities, but I find it quite hard to trust people nowdays.
& currently, I'm not ready to sacrifice my other happiness for anyone. Nobody has caught my eye to make me give up the joys of singlehood yet!
Meeting screwed people, liars, seems to be a norm now.
Whoa, you can never imagine how scary some people can be!!!

HUAT AR.

Shall include pictures from each day!!
HUAT AR, this post gonna be a little longer cos it's kinda picture heavy!

Pool night with leslie & gang! (day 1, after reunion dinner)

Boohoohoo.

I AM OFFICIALLY SICK AS OF YESTERDAY.

THROAT WAS MOTHERFUCKING PAINFUL, to the extent that I imagined someone actually hated me so much that they were probably secretly practicing vodoo on me. LOLOL.

Aaron! (day 2)

Okay, nothing extraordinary, just another case of THROAT INFLAMATION.

Why I always tio this!! Throat got that weak anot!

I think I can get throat inflamation at least twice a year lor.

Doctor said it was probably a case of too much dust in my room, or not changing the bedsheets weekly.

Dustmites accumulated over the years just served to aggravate my sensitive nose & throat, making me super prone to all these nonsense viruses.
Such an unwelcome visitor during CNY,

HOW I WISH THEY COULD BE KILLED WITH BAYGON IN JUST A SPRAY. HAHA

paternal side girlssss! (day 1)

Maternal side cuzzies! (not all present) (day 1)

I am officially drained too. (drained from the heart attacks of gambling.) geeez I'm kidding^^

Been out for all 4 days of CNY, after reunion dinner to the next 4 days of visiting and playing.

@ Wannie's house (day 3)

Lemme continue from where I left my previous post:

*********************
Day 1: Visiting at both paternal and maternal sides, supper & pool in the night with Leslie & friends!

Day 2: Aaron visited, went to an aunt's house for more gambling, and even more gambling followed at Zr's aunt's house & Betty's house. 16 people Gambling first time I gambled with such a big group. Baccarat made the bankers either lose/win pretty much. (on the low side of 3 digits, but its still considered quite a big amount to me)

BUT I KUP WITH TERENCE AND WON 80+ BUCKS! okay he was being kind and 'donated' alot to me LOL.

Day 3: 1st stop was Wannie's house, followed by Huishan visiting my side, 'bbq' over at Jac's place, and drinking with Andreas & Levi at Outdoors bar(Somerset, opp Orchard Central)

Day 4: Selina's house, then Betty's house again. This time round it was a full girls day out! A girly affair hmmm ^^

@ Jac's house with her ahgong a.k.a my god-ahgong! (day 3)

Peiying the chef cooking our delicious beef that night! sorry ah, we no patience to wait for it to slowly grill :<

Everyday sibeh happening, & the days were so fully packed that I'd no time for myself!!

Thank god I din join the girls clubbing on the night of day 3, sure shaggy max.

Levi, Huishan, Andreas! (day 3)

Muahh hot babies! @ Betty's house (day 4)

And yesterday we had to rush the BSD ppt slides for today's presentation.

Quite a sucky presentation, one of my worse, I hope it doesn't happen again.

I really feel that my grades this sem will be quite shitty :<

I cannot afford to let it drop any further!! MUST AT LEAST GET A 3.0 TO GET INTO SIM.

That itself serves as great motivation cos I don't wanna be stranded without a degree in the future!

I make the effort to blog, so help me out with ads ah! muacksss!

Just transferred the photos in my camera, those taken from the whole of yesterday to this morning.
I think the total amount of photos taken are able to fill 3 facebook albums, and this is only for day 1.

& I'm waiting for Aaron to come over my house to bai nian now!
I want big groups to come over leh, so that I can finally take out my mahjong set and play. (Every year my parents don't allow people to visit our house. weird much?)
It's rare that my family allows people to visit/step into my house, so do make use of this opportunity people!!

beloved motherrrr

I'm so lazy to edit the photos now. It's not just photos with friends faces, I've 'people shots' which I still have yet to filer. Not forgetting the many projects which are going to be due in several days time. Hmmm.

Maternal grandma!

Anyway there's this annoying throbbing at the left side of my head. My dad keeps telling me its nothing much to worry about, just the blood pulsating, probably because of the pressure from the paintball that hit my head.(you would know what I mean from one of my previous post)


Ugh I should probably get a full body checkup done soon. So many problems carried over from the previous year, I wanna enter this new year with good health!

Cai shen dao wo de jia men kou!

Hi, I'm back early from this year's reunion dinnerzzzzz.
Super boring. IKR, the festive mood just dips lower with each passing year!

Usually, its a norm for the family to play Bj after the dinner, but we've not played for several consecutive years. Sth wrong here?
Even cousins, as they mature, they disappear right after reunion dinners/actual day to meet their friends to countdown etc.

Some of the few pictures I managed to capture before the hungry people started devouring everything!

(sorry if pics are shitty, I don't really know how to take pictures of food to make them seem tantalising, this was the best I could do then!)

no.1 step that cannot be missed - LOU HEI !!

See the elated faces. HUAT AR!!

Bueh Kalak - Peranakan dish made by my aunt! All time fav.

Siew yok(Roasted Pork)!

Mushroom with some abalone imitation?

The TOU FA(HAIR) as they like to call it.

I H.A.T.E FAMILY CONFLICTS. Every year, it's reunion with pretentious relatives. And on the actual day itself, everyone's gonna be wearing a false smile, faking out a joyous occasion.
My family only visits for the sake of my grandma and to continue the tradition.
I can forsee that soon, reunion dinners will be held with only my family ourselves.

SHALL END HERE WITH A CUTE PIC OF MY YOUNGEST COUSIN AT MY PATERNAL SIDE!
MUACKSSSS<3

Help me out with my ads people! CNY - Season of giving ah? HUAT AR!