In loving memory

There's a silence in my mind, rattled with unbelief, while wrestling with compromise.

Who knew growing up could be a painful realization that the world was not as innocent as it seems?

In the midnight before Christmas, I stare at the screen with unblinking eyes. My thoughts scrambled, yet converging onto the one, single thing that has been haunting my mind.

That one thing starts with A, and ends with Y, and there's two other vowels in between, but hey, go figure.

The minor event that happened today, has sparked a stark truth in all of us. We're drifting away.

The thought of us growing old together, and bringing all our kids for our yearly gatherings and whatsoever, it ain't happening.

If that is happening. Then, i solemnly bow my head, and lay my bouquet of roses in front of the tombstone in my mind that reads " In loving memory, of our youth. "

To 2010, a beginning of our departure.

Salmon, signing out.

Contented is one word that summarizes my absence

Back to the world of blogging, after being out of the scene for such a long time. Figured that this will keep my mind ticking, slowing the process of a imminent decay in the neurons and cells up there.

From bmtc to sispec then to selarang camp, my migration has landed me 20 mins away from home now, and the feeling is awesome!

Love my new working environment and all the different people there(:

hope its permanent

this kinda of joy should last till ord

salmon, signing out

Its been a month and a half since i entered the army. Things have been ok, not fabulous, not horrible, just alright. 

In the army, I've learn how to push myself mentally, sometimes past the inconceivable. That being said, the most important growth experienced the last few weeks have not only been physical, but most importantly mental and emotional. 

When you're facing tough challenges, that hovers between monotonous and strenous activities, we all need a focus, a deliberate point of motivation to keep us charging ahead. Taking one footstep for a purpose,  and another for glory, and another for destiny. The most important challenge is not made up in a form of competition amongst each other, but the ultimate battle is the war that rages inside our minds, that calls us to give in and give up every other second.

But, i'm glad i made it.

No injuries, no sickness, no prolonged pain.

Only a tinch of heartache.

In the deep recesses of the island, my heart grows numb to it,

but back in the world, the shell protecting it fades, and here lies my bare heart, raw and vulnerable.

I really miss her, even if its only a couple of weeks, not being able to see her this weekend, has left a lingering sadness at the back of my mind.

Salmon, signing out.

So Ordinary

Here's my latest song. enjoy

http://www.sendspace.com/file/2fib1f

So Ordinary

Today, I'm trying to get you out my mind.
I'm sorry, but you have overstayed, your way.
Tomorrow, we'll wake to the sounds of rain,
and feel the wind that never left us the same.

Fly me straight into your arms,
And i should never let you go.

And I am so ordinary, you amaze me.
Out of my league, that's where you're standing.
But inevitably, you inspire me.
Out of mind, out of sight,
Yet you, you make me sing.

Take heed, the lessons learnt from yesterday,
And know, we all deserve our chances the same.
And don't go, drifting along the streams of time and space.
We've got to set our eyes on other better days ahead.

Fly me straight into your arms,
And i should never let you go.

And I am so ordinary, you amaze me.
Out of my league, that's where you're standing.
But inevitably, you inspire me.
Out of mind, out of sight,
And you..

And there's just so much of me, you refine me.
Deep in my dreams, that's where you're standing.
but inevitably, you remind me.
I'm outta line, outta time,
yet you, you make me sing.


Salmon, signing out

And finally,
the creator returns to his creation,
bidding it a temporary farewell.

Dear Blog,
This is it.
It's officially a day away.
I'm going to be honest and say,
that i don't really know wad to expect.
But, but. i really hope it's not a dread.
Having to be away from my world for weeks,
and i guess i'll miss loads of things.

Like.

dota
my guitar
my drums

yea, but all these are trivial.

there are about a hundred more important things to miss,
but it's hard to miss something i don't know i'm missing out yet.

like.

my bed.
my family
my friends

oh, and i will miss dinners with cherish.
and. jogging with andrew
and talking rubbish on the phone with audrey
and jermyn's sillyness
and soccer with vscb
and net!
and.. bumming around.

So, dearest blog, until next time. i would definitely be able to think of a thousand other things i would miss while i'm away.

salmon, signing out.

random poem thinggy.

What if the best thing that's happened to you walked you by?
You close your eyes, and let it just slip by.
When you open them again, you see it move away. far from where you'd stay.

You try running after it, but felt exhausted after awhile,
you thought, " it'll be okay. Something else better's bound to be along the way."
so, you tried and tried so many times, and it hurts so much on the inside.

What if the best thing that's happened to you walked you by, again?
Do you see with different light, and pursue it with all your might?
Or maybe, just maybe.. you'll work everything down to a second time.

My, Oh my.
It's hazardous to chase one's mind.
Sigh, deep sigh.
Not gonna make the same mistake twice. i'll try, i'll really do try.

Salmon,signing out.

Subconciously. I'm refusing to let my blog die. And having a blog is like having a.. baby? Like the added responsibility kinda lingers around in your mind when you're going through each day.

Anyway, today marks the end of my teaching career and honestly. Knowing me, i'm not a sentimental person, even when pamella and the kangs left for Australia for a year, i was pretty much unfazed. haha, but for my class oneone, darn. i'm ACTUALLY sad that i'm leaving, and miss kuah was so nice!! (: she made them put up a performance for me, like this guy was playing the guitar and another guy was singing. Although he was really bad, coz he was out of tune and he forgot his entries but it was so sweet(: and they got me this big board and wrote little tweet notes for me, all along the lines of " thanks for teaching us physics" and then i performed for them "you and me" by lifehouse, although i got sian after the first chorus and went like ok, that's all. oh, and i gave them 8 dollars worth of sweets, and they were so happy. lol! then i started talking about life after secondary school and like tell them "VJC is very good, you all must do your best and come." then miss kuah was like " temasek is better" then i seriously, thought for awhile, then i was like huh? really ah, they beat us this year? Then, i realised that she was trying to say she was from TJC so i gave her a -_- look. and she said "temasek is better" again with an even louder voice. lol, wadever.

On the bright side, i get to play for 1 whole month! yes. (:

Salmon, signing out.