Buy Used

After my posts about sewing, some folks emailed me and said "Michelle, I would love to learn to sew, but I just can't afford to buy a sewing machine."


Well, I have two words: Buy Used.


There are tons of machines out there, and if you are careful, you can get a machine that will work well for you, last forever, and if you are brave, can service yourself. I'm working my way up to that level of bravery. I don't want to break my new baby! But I want to prove that you don't have to spend tons of money to get a great quality machine, so I put my money where my mouth is and picked up a used Singer. I will keep you posted as to whether I have to tuck my tail between my legs and take it in to be serviced.


My recommendation is that if you want to get into sewing, but don't have a lot of money to spend, buy a machine made in the mid-60's or earlier. Why? Becuase you can probably get a machine that has all-metal parts. That means that unless someone left it outside in the yard as a garden ornament, with a little oil and some cleaning, it will work just fine.


Before I was born, my grandmother bought a Singer Touch and Sew. It was a 700 series, a fine machine. Every year she would clean and oil it, and that machine chugged along until I was in graduate school. Right now it is waiting for service because there are some problems with the tension, but I am sure that it can be fixed. Why? Because Singer made a quality machine. When my grandparents bought that machine, they paid $700.00 for it. Do you know how MUCH $700.00 was back then? That machine was meant to last forever. The quality of that machine is far and away better than the quality of the machines that you can purchase today. Even the machines that cost you $1000.00 today can't match the sheer durability of those vintage machines.


Being a bit nostalgic for that old machine, I started paying attention to some of the threads about vintage machines on a sewing message board that I belong to. I also started doing some research and found that there are a ton of great machines to be had out there. Namely, Singers from the 1950's and 1960's, especially Singer Slant-O-Matics. So I started searching, and this is what I found.

On Craig's List, I found a 1963 Singer Slant-O-Matic for $85.00. But it wasn't JUST the machine. I also got the original manual, two boxes of top-hat cams (which is how those old machines make all the fancy stitches that are programmed into the new computerized machines. Yes, they do everything the new machines do, just in a different way), and a box of feet, bobbins, and attachments. I also got a wooden desk that the machine folds into, cleverly disguising it as a lovely piece of furniture when not in use producing clothing and curtains.

I was also able to convince J. that this purchase was NECESSARY, because look at what an identical machine just sold for on Ebay....$377.00!! I didn't spend money, I just MADE us money!

The Ebay machine didn't come with a desk, AND you had to pay shipping, so there.

So, if you want to learn to sew, but don't want to spend a lot of money on a machine, keep your eyes on your local thrift shops, garage sales, and Craig's List. If you can find a Singer 401 or 403; 500 or 503 (the Rocketeer, very cool, very retro); or the 603, grab it. You won't be disappointed. They were considered top of the line when new, and vintage buffs will tell you that these machines will run for 100 years with a little TLC.

Stranded

Everyone should know a few basic things about automotive repair, because getting stranded is a real pain in the ass.

Most of us who have been driving for any period of time can recognize such maladies as a dead battery or an overheated radiator, but now that vehicles have become so complex, more often than not an issue that cannot be easily fixed and is related to something mysteriously referred to as "the computer."

Recently, "the computer" gave me some trouble in my car. I was really worried about getting stranded, but I remembered there is a SUPER EASY way to reset your computer, and you don't need any serious tools. All you have to do is disconnect and reconnect your battery. Remember, though, it will erase the computer's memory, so you won't be able to go back and find out what was wrong to begin with. On the other hand, when they "run the diagnostics" at the dealership, all they are really doing is erasing the computer's memory.

So, here is my story....

It started on my way home from work. About 1/3 of the way home, the battery light came on. Then, as I was sitting at a stoplight, the car just died. Completely. Lights, radio, everything. I didn't kill it. I can actually drive a stick competently, regardless of the fact that some people are convinced that ovaries secrete a hormone that prevents you from a. driving a stick or b. knowing the least little bit about cars and what may ail them and c. having any knowledge of finances, most especially home loans.

So, the car died, forcing me to curse a lot. I tried to restart the car. It just clicked. I cursed more, and in my frustration, twisted the key one last time, expecing nothing.

But, the car started. Kind of. It was idling really low, so I kept my foot on the gas while it was in neutral, not letting it fall below 1000 RPM. The light turned green, I put the car in gear, and at first everything was fine. But then it hit 2500 RPM, and the engine just backed off, back down to 500. I put it in second and got going, and again, once it hit 2500 RPM, the engine spun back down to nothing.

Cursing like a trucker, I changed my route home to avoid the highway, since clearly, I was not going any faster than 35 miles per hour.

As I was sitting at a stoplight cursing incoherently and throwing myself around in the seat like an epileptic, it dawned on me...I have the number for the dealership...it's on my keychain...it's only 5:10, sureley they are still there! People work! But they still need to pick up their cars!!

So I called and no...they were not still there...so I left a message on the service manager's voicemail to call me immediately when he gets in in the morning because he is going to have to come get this piece of crap!

Amazingly, he did acutally call me. At 6:45 AM this morning. The next time I tell someone to call me first thing, I'm going to do a little more research and find out when it is they actually get into work. So I explained to him what had happened and this is how the conversation went from there:

Car Guy: It sounds to me like there are some old fault codes stored in the computer, we need to clear those out.

Me: Yeah, it was acting so wierd, I figured it was the computer too. So I reset it. It's fine now.

Car Guy: What...Wait...Wha....you reset the computer?

Me: Yeah. I reset it.

Car Guy: Do you mind if I ask, HOW?

Me: Well, when I got home, I thought about it for a while, and it seemed to me that none of the problems were clearly the engine, or clearly the battery, or clearly the clutch or the transmission. So I figured I would reset the computer and see if that did the trick. So, I disconnected the battery cables, and then reconnected them and now it is fine.

Car Guy: YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

Me: Yes I can.

Car Guy: No, you can't!

Me: Yes I can. Ask any one of your mechanics.

So, I hear him set down the phone and yell for one of the mechanics to come over and he asks him if disconnecting the battery will reset the computer, and I hear the mechanic say "most of the time, yeah it works great. But sometimes it erases the codes so you can't go back and see what the problem was to begin with."

Then I hear him pick up the phone again and kind of sheepishly says "How did you know to do that?"

Me: Dude, I'm a girl, not retarded.

Car Guy: I didn't mean to imply that! But no one knows that you can do that!

Me: Yeah, but I know. Why would I be tooling around in a car that I don't know how to fix? Otherwise I'd be calling tow trucks for flat tires and transmission fluid.

Car Guy: Yeah, but lots of people do call tows for that.

Me: That is because they are retarded. But I'm not, remember?

Car Guy: Yeah, I caught that.

So, I let J take it in the next Monday so they could make sure I didn't accidentally remove the steering wheel while I was trying to reconnect the battery. Cause you know, I'm a girl and stuff and potentially retarded. This is the conversation that J had with the Car Guy:

Car Guy: Well, we can't find anything wrong with it, and all the codes have been erased.

J: Will it be ok?

Car Guy: It should be fine, but if she hadn't erased the codes we could tell what was wrong with it to begin with.

J: I'll let her know.

Car Guy: Tell her not to disconnect the battery anymore.

J: Tell her?

Car Guy: Tell her not to do that.

J: Tell her? You've met her, right?

Any Wall but THAT One!

Not long after moving into my current house, disaster struck in the form of a cracked stack. For those who have not had to go through this, the "stack" is the main waste drainage line for the entire house. It is that massive pipe in the basement that all the pipes in the house tie into. It then drops under the basement floor, and runs out to the main sewer line.

In old houses, if it has not been replaced, the stack is generally made of cast iron. Another little tidbit you may need to know if you purchase a house...if a house is vacant for a long time, a cast iron stack will "dry out" and will often crack. Yeah, yeah, I know it sounds like bullshit, but I have the awesomest plumber in the world and he is the one that told me this. If I ever paid what I should for the work he does, I would think the he was handing me some kind of line (just like the mechanics who want to recharge your air filter for $150.00), but he has actually done work for free here, so I think he's on the level.

Well, I bought a house that had been vacant for a year and as it would turn out, my stack cracked.

Now, when your stack cracks, especially in a two story home, the ONLY way to repair it is to cut out whatever wall it is behind. As my luck would have it, the stack sat in the corner of the downstairs bathroom. Meaning, that the wall that would have to be cut out was not a drywall wall, but a plaster wall. And not just any plaster wall...a plaster wall with an ornate combed treatment on it. NOOOO!!! ANY WALL BUT THAT ONE!! I recognized immediately that I was in for total financial rape. Here is what I was left with after the stack was replaced:


A cracked stack is not something that you can undertake on your own, and for the repair you may be looking at anywhere from 2-4 days of work at a cost $1500.00 to over $4000.00. Pretty frightening, right? But, there are some things that you can do to mediate the expenses.

1. When considering purchasing an older home, look into purchasing a home warranty. Your realtor can help you with this, or you can go directly to AON and American Home Shield. I have had warranties with both companies and was pleased with both of them. For about $600.00, you can get a year's coverage which is renewable. My stack replacement was covered by my warranty, and I ended up paying under $300.00 for the job after I was reimbursed by the warranty company.
2. Do what you can to prepare and to repair before and after. Rather than having the plumber cut out the section of wall at $50.00 or more an hour, do it yourself.
3. In my case, there were other things I could do to prepare that would cut down on the plumber's time. I cleared everything out of the bathroom (mirror, window treatments), shut off the water, and removed the toilet and stored it in the basement. While this might not seem like much, it saved me an hour in plumber's labor.

And the thing that saved me the most money of all...do your own wall repair after the stack replacement is complete. Now, I could have made the drywall repair. But, it was a corner, and I didn't want my first drywall project in the house to be all ganked up. Fortunately for me, since I had done such a good job preparing for the plumber to do his work, he offered to insert the patch for me....for free. Yep, for free. See, good preparation buys you goodwill with people who are used to dealing with assholes with ridiculous expectations. If you live in St. Louis, and need an excellent plumber, email me. I will hook you up!

After the plumber put in the drywall patch, he left the rest for me to take care of:


The next step was to figure out how to recreate the combed plaster on the wall. For that, I would need to make a trip to the hardware store. But how to match some kind of a tool to the combs in the plaster? Ahh...a stroke of brilliance! I grabbed one of the crayons and a sheet of drawing paper from the toybox I kept for my niece and nephew. I peeled the paper off the crayon, and using the side of the crayon, ran it over the paper as I held it up to the wall, making a "rubbing." I folded up the rubbing, tucked it into my pocket and headed for the hardware store where I was able to compare various different tools to the impressions from the plaster.

What I found was this, a trowel for applying tile adhesive:
Now to create the combed pattern, I had to get some additional materials, including a giant tub of drywall mud and also a sanding block. This is how I recreated the combed pattern in the original plaster:

First, I spread a layer of drywall mud onto the patch about 1/8th of an inch thick. I started by covering only about a 2-foot length. If the mud dries, don't worry, you can sand it off. It will be messy, and the dust will get everywhere except the crack of your butt, but you can do it. I then drew the short side of the trowel across the mud in a curving pattern:



As I recreated the pattern, I drew the mud over the undamaged part of the wall, so that there would not be a visible "seam" between the patch and the old wall. I allowed the mud to dry for two full days, due to the thickness. Then, I took a foam sanding block and "knocked down" the high points, as it was a bit rougher looking than the original treatment. Once I took a light sanding pass over the tops of the combed portions, it looked exactly like the previous treatment.

This left just painting. The bathroom was red to begin with, so you must use a primer when covering a white wall. Primer for red paint is bright pink...very fun!

I then painted the rest of the bathroom a deep wine color, assuming (correctly) that the original red paint would serve as a primer. When painting a patterned wall, it is necessary to use a roller with a very, very thick nap on it and be prepared to use lots of paint. I used nearly a gallon for the bathroom, and had to apply three coats in some places to get complete coverage deep in the combed pattern. However, in the end it was definitely worth it. Here is the completed project, new paint, fresh white trim, and window treatment and mirror back up.


Sometimes, big, expensive repairs are unavoidable, but if you get a little creative you can save yourself a lot of money by doing those things that are time consuming but not exceptionally difficult. After speaking with my plumber, we estimated that by preparing the bathroom, cutting out the wall myself, and finishing the wall repair myself, I saved approximately $1250.00 of his labor, materials, and time.

Be creative! You can do it!

Slip-Coverin' Away

My friend Michelle asked me to write about making slipcovers and my initial reaction was "Run! Save yourself! Don't do it!!" Because I'll tell you, my one experience making slipcovers was miserable. I was homicidal by the time I was finished, and I wanted to remind her "If you undertake this project, make sure you have some bail money set aside." But the more I thought about it, I thought that the best thing that I could do is to tell you what my experience was so that you could decide for yourself whether or not to take a project like this on. I don't even have photos to show you, because I gave away that hideous couch with those shameful slipcovers in 2003, so you will just have to take my word for it that it was a BAD IDEA and not in the least bit cost-effective.

First thing, you will need to select a fabric. If you are covering a couch, it may take as much as 15 yards. If you are covering a couch and a loveseat, you may be talking about 20-25 yards if you select a design with a ruffle, pleats, piping or other details.

When you select your fabric, you will want to select something that is sturdy, heavier-weight than your standard cotton. You will also want something that is washable, because really, what is the point of slipcovers if they aren't washable?

Now think about it....25 yards of fabric....if you get it in sale, maybe you can get the fabric for $5.00 a yard. That is still $125.00 just for the fabric. You will also need zippers, velcro, a heavy-duty needle for your machine (or two or three) and lots of thread. In fact, when I made mine, I made it twice. I bought some cheap poly fabric for 99 cents a yard and actually made the slipcovers from that, so that I would be able to adjust the pattern. For the final version, I used a khaki-colored cotton trigger, a fabric that is relatively inexpensive, but is heavy broadcloth.

You will also need to buy a pattern or get some other kind of instructions. Most major pattern companies sell home decor patterns, and I strongly recommend getting one. Keep in mind, however, that they won't be "patterns" so much as they will be detailed instructions. You can't really get a "pattern" since furniture is so variable. Some couches have two cushions instead of three. Some are pillow-back, some backs are upholstered and attached. Some have rolled arms. Some do not. You get the picture.



I also bought large sheets of newsprint to use to draw outlines of the cushions. You also will need to measure, measure, measure and measure again. I cannot stress this enough. I thought I had all my measurements right and STILL ended up with a wonky back on the couch. I nearly gave myself a hernia wrestling the couch into a slipcover that was just this much too short across the back.

But, if you are feeling brave, there are a couple of things I can tell you...

I replaced all the zippers in my slipcovers with velcro. And thank gawd I did, because otherwise that fabric would not have had enough give in it to meet across the back of the couch.

If you are a beginner, this is going to be hard to the point of making you insane. You will have to learn piping, you will have to ease corners, you will have to make box pleats. You will have to gather ruffles. You will have to draft your own pattern pieces. This is NOT, I repeat NOT a project for beginners.

By the time I was done, It took nearly $200.00 in fabric and materials to make slipcovers that looked almost exactly like this:


$200.00 in materials for slipcovers that I could buy today at JC Penney for $74.99 for the couch and $64.99 for the loveseat. Now, I was a liberal arts major, but I am pretty sure that $200.00 - ($74.99 + $64.99) = $60.02

Yep.

$60.02.

That is how much MORE it cost me to make slipcovers as opposed to buying them.

My advice to you? Buy the slipcovers. Make some throw pillows. Your sanity and your checkbook with thank you.