Dream

I was real bored, so I browsed through the Facebook, reading others' accounts and I came across this saying in one of the notes I read.

" By their very nature, dreams can never come true. If we were ever to fulfill a dream, it ceases to exist and is a dream no more.

Forever a journey, an imaginary destination..."

I don't know if it's his own opinion or he took it from a book (i think it's his opinion), but these made me ponder upon the meaning of dreams...

Dream is "forever a journey, an imaginary destination", is it?

I think it depends on what the dream is- how realistic it is... If it's realistic, it can come true! It is not imaginary. Well, it may start out to be just one's imagination, but it is possible to be realized.

I agree that if the dream came true, it won't exist anymore...

...It has become a reality!

Holiday mode...
It's freezing out there, making me not wanting to take a step out of the house, just wanna cuddle up in my room watching shows...

I got Doong Ee for dunno when. His owner went to dallas so I got to babysit him. Kinna miss him, but he's still sooo spoilt.

We had a Korean Bbq stlye dinner last night. Too bad we din take photos. I just realized that I havent' taken any photo with my roommate before. haha...

Anyway, back to slacking...

The finals are finally over!!!! Yeah! An end to a busy, busy semester! The semester seemed to take forever to end! Ok, i'm just exaggerating... I wished the semester would end as soon as it started... Anyway, I had 5 exams and one each day MOnday to Friday.

Honestly, I still couldn't decide which one is worse- one every day for 5 days or a combination of one or two per day with a day or two break in between. There are the good and bad for each situation... I'm just soooo exhausted with burning midnight oil, sleeping at 2.30am each night... Needless to say, I have a pimple breakout due to late night and unhealthy diet :(

Time to relax now!

What I take away from this semester is that ... accounting is not that bad. Seriously! I hated accounting! Journal and adjusting entries, statements of cash flows, balance sheet... But I don't hate accounting as much after this semester. I guess I really put in more effort in learning about the subject and it turned out to be pretty good.

Speech is kinna fun! Perhaps that's because I have the greatest instructor ever! haha... Ms. Elwood. She's so bubbly, always smiling and her passion... you can see it! She made the "dreaded" speech 2713 seemed less intimidating and fun! She always refers us- her students- as sweet students, greatest students ever... I'm gonna miss her!

And, it's kinna nice not working and just studying... more time to "relax". No more going home at night feeling bumped out from standing for 5/6 straight hours, no more worrying about finding a sub., no more working during final weeks.... but... there's always a but, isn't it? But, I have no income :(

I really hope I would get a better job- as in hopefully no more job in dining services... but I think it's just a fat hope >.<

Finally!!!! the end of october... end of a busy, busy month! *sigh*

I can finally feel relaxed!

I got my ex-roomie's dog for almost a week. Ani brought him over, but couldn't really play due him for my exams and assignment. So felt bad for not playing with him.... he felt so restless for being tied in a corner. I wanted to set him free, but he needs supervison. Otherwise, I will come home to a mess!

But he's such a spoilt puppy! You have to sit beside him when he eats, otherwise, he won't eat -.-
But he was so cute last night. He kept looking at Ani's hamster. He sat down beside the cage, and when the hamster went into his house at the corner, he scratched the corner to make the hamster went out. haha.... And he was soooooo absorbed with watching the hamster that nothing we did distract him! I almost thought he was a cat!

I want a puppy too.... but not as spoilt as this puppy. haha...

Also, i learnt an important lesson about gossipping >.<
I felt really bad... Lesson well learnt!

I went to my first American football match, finally!!! The atmosphere was alright. It wasn't a big game, but I got the feel of the "orange" spirit of OSU! And also a little knowledge of this version of football... still prefer the English version though!

I have been super busy these past few weeks and will be busy till the end of October. October is- will be- an extremely busy month. Started with 2 birthdays--> 2 birthday cakes to make.

First, Zhi's birthday. I decided to make an ice cream cake. Literally, an ice cream cake; ice cream on top, and cake below- ice cream cake :P

The next day, it was ani & ana's birthday... cheesecake for them! And Ani wanted to have a bbq for her birthday. So bbq at night... (an another bbq the next day!)

It amazed me too that I can make two cakes which were honestly not bad for a first timer. It was the first time I make ice cream cake and cheesecake! Haha... kinna relieved that the cakes turned out well- both taste and appearance :) (althought the cheesecake was rather under baked). I guess that's one of the good thing of coming to US. I'm "forced" to cook!!! Haha...

The day after, it was International Expo. Had to help out selling satay, grilled the satay, not forgetting the hot afternoon sun grilling us all too... 3 days in a row, my days were filled with food! Not surprising, I was left exhausted at the end of the third day!

Finally, Fall Break came. Only 1 day, but it's still enought for a weekend trip to Dallas, TX...

We basically went there to eat, shop and get away from Stillwater. Ani and I went to get our haircut too. hehe... 4 hour drive for a haircut. hmph...

Exams are coming, assignments and project are due.... I want October to pass quickly!!!

I'm sooooo over the moon right now.... why? 'caused I passed my driving test! Yup, i passed my practical test in my first try :D I always thought that it would be a kind of miracle if I ever passed my driving test in my first try. I'm not so good at practical stuffs....

But with practice and a little faith, nothing is impossible... my passing the test is a prove of that! I always have issues with my self-esteem. Zhi asked me why I am always so pessimistic... it's not that i want to think negatively, but at times, I felt the more confident I feel, the more I was likely to fail, and when you have high expectations, the more you will be disappointed. And I always give myself an excuse for thinking negatively-- I'm preparing for the worst, so if it happened, the impact would be lesser on me. I know it's a mindset that I have to change. It's difficult, no doubt about it.

But i'm slowly trying to alter my outlook on things. I guess I just have to learn to have the right dose of confident- not to small but not to much- just the right dosage.

I have to buy zhi ice cream. We agreed that if I fail, he had to console me and buy me ice cream and if i passed, i have to buy him one (though i just write it off). Anyway, it's an ice cream that I would gladly buy for him :D

It's 3am on friday 20th June (singapore time). The alarm clock rang, but I was too lazy to get up. I would just catch the second half, I thought. I slept, and made a dream about betting... weird dream, but it made me remember about the quarter-final match between germany and portugal.

I was rather irritated when I learnt that I would have to watch the euro 2008 online as only cable tv broadcasted the match :(

cable tv... i missed US at this time... it would be afternoon so I would not have to cut my sleep short and I wouldn't have to settle for online tv...

anyway, the match was entertaining with 5 goals. 3 of them were through headers!!!

My bet was on Portugal... Thankfully, I kept my money where it belonged and did not bet.
Germany3-2 Portugal FT

Germany was right on target!

Off the field...
I just read from a blog that a teacher from zhss, mr kelvin tan passed away... I'm not sure how old he was, but he was YOUNG! And from the days in zhss, he came across as someone who's healthy and fit (likes working-out type of guy). As it turned out, he had a liver infection and delayed his treatment so as to be there for his students for Mid-year.

I was shocked by his sudden death, but deeply moved by his commitment as a teacher.

I guess it's just another reminder of how fragile life can be.

Didn't bring camera but thanks to zhi kai, the budding photographer, we had this photo. hehe...

I'm back at Spore!!! =P

The day after I reached, Bangkok trip was awaiting. Even before I managed to shrug off the jet-lag, I had to board another plane to another city.

Overall, Bangkok was alright. It was hot and humid... duh! What was I expecting???

Anyway, we visited temples, floating market, and some shopping areas. The things were not as cheaply priced as I thought. Nonetheless, we still bought some clothes and souvenirs.

Back to Singapore and fatigue was bugging me down. It held me back from going out. I was soooo tired that I stayed at home for 2 days.

Then, it time to check out the great singapore sale (GSS).

Last night, meet up with some of 4e1 people. The guys or shall I say the NS guys had nothing to say except NS stuffs -.- Nonetheless, it was nice to meet them again after a year! We at Fish&Co. I had seafood platter and shared it with Jac and Yaowen. Then we went to Giraffe, restaurant and bar. Initially, I thought they wanted to go to a pub, and I would definitely not go there (Zhi forbid me to go there too. hehe...) But the "pub" turned out to be a restaurant cum bar. So jac and I decided to join them for a little while. We ordered juices, a very expensive juice, and we chit chat for a while. Just 20 min past nine, we bid our goodbye to our NS guys and headed for PS. However, almost all the shops were closing for the day, so we walked for abour 15 mins and headed home. I was tired, but felt happy to meet up with my ex-classmates!!! But I didn't bring my camera -.-

while I'm happy to meet my family and friends, i still miss zhi >.< I wish he was here!!!

last sunday, we met a lost dog opposite my apartment.

Ani was going home and while we chatted at my door, she saw a dog opposite and whistled. To our suprised, the dog came to us. We quickly went inside and closed the door but the dog was still outside.

We played with dog for a while. The dog was pretty obedient and we saw a red strap on his neck, but no name, just a strap. We brought the dog to Viking and Indra's house. Played there for some time and then we walked to the original place where the dog was last spotted. We let the dog roamed on his own hoping he will find his way hope. But the dog was really lost.

After debating, we decided to call the police. Ana called. The first time, he was told that it was not an emergency -.-

the second time, he was told that the Animal Control unit was closed and we should call again tomorrow.

So we decided to bring the dog to Zhi's house. It was easy to ask the dog to go into the car but he just refused to go down. I think he was scared he would be abandoned again. When zhi and ani wanted to carry him, he threatened to bite them.

We fed him with bread and ani managed to lure him off the car. finally!

The dog stayed over at zhi's house.... we went home at 1am! and we still had an 8.30am class tmr >.<

Zhi brought the dog to my place in the moring and we decided to bring the dog to ana's house for ana to look after. The dog wouldn't climbed up the stairs, unfortunately. then, he saw a squirrell and chased after it. The squirrell seek refuge on top a tree nearby while the dog waiting patiently for it to go down. He would leave the tree no matter what we do to distract him. We were running late for class. Ana was left with the dog and the responsibility of calling the animal control people.

While we were sitting bored to sleep in the lecture room, ana messaged ani and the dog was brought away by the control unit people. The dog kept looking back at ana, asking for help. Poor dog! Wonder who's the owner! I hope he found a better home.

And the puppy above.... isn't he cute???

teeth

such a loong time with no update... sorry.

I didn't even know where to start... May be I should just stat with what happened to me a week ago...

I had sore throat on Thursday night, I think... got a little worse on friday and on saturday, the sore throat is better, but got cough and block nose :S On sunday, all seemed to be better till I ate satay from the group gathering... couldn't resist the temptation, it's been a while since I ate such food... So I had to face the music with more sore throat at night.

On Monday, I decided to go the the doctor, by this time, my sore throat was a little better. No antibiotic needed just some medicide to unclogged the phelm and the "liquid" blocking my ear which caused pain when I swallowed.

I was soooo desperate for the flu and sore throat to go away before or by Thursday. But still had a littel cough on Thurday, nothing serious, but i could say that it's some what recoverd... I was glad for this as Thursday was the "BIG DAY" ....

On april 17 2008 afternoon, I had to say goodbye to 4 of my teeth! Two wisdom teeth which I have never seen before as they have yet erupted... the only pictures I had of them was the X-ray. then my two first premolars. So beautiful and nicely grown they are, yet they had to be extracted to make way for the other teeth when I got my braces T.T

A few minutes before I was called to the "extraction room" I was second guessing myself... Zhi and Ani went with me. I told Ani that i was so scared that i didn't want to do it anymore, lets go home... but I paid the cost alr... Ani and Zhi kept telling me it will be alright.

I was called... made one last trip to the restroom before I sat down at the dentist chair. My blood pressure was taken... the nurse, Pam I think asked me a few questions before he gave me some laughing gas to help me relax. Then, the oral surgeon came. I assured me it will be easy for me... He inserted a needle on my left arm... I could feel the laughing gas worked its was down my body as I felt as light as feather. Then the GA was inserted. The last word I could hear was the nurse telling me that I would see the ceiling swirling ... I looked up, saw the ceiling and the dentist lamp...and then blank!

When I opened my eyes again, I saw Zhi and then Ani with a nurse, explaining to them my after surgery care.... I slept for a little while agian before waking up. I was then told to sit down before Ani and the nurse helped me walk to the car.

At home, I was quite a struggle to eat or drink anything liquid nevermind trying to swallow the medicine when my mouth was numb. The lips to the side of the tongue were soooo numb. Zhi and ani tried to fed me mashed potato (which i only managed to swallow with difficulty twice) and then sprite (for some reason the doctor recommened me to drink sprite or 7-up before I ate anything). I couldn't get much things down my throat with the numbness. But I had to eat my medicine nonetheless.

They had to crush my medicine but it's still so hard to swallow it. Many were left on my tongue... After all the crushed medicine seemed to be swallowed by me. I lied down with my head elevated to get some sleep.... after a few minutes, my stomach felt so uncomfortable. I know I wanted to vomit.... I tried to fight out the nauseous feeling, but unsuccessful. By this time, Ani has gone back to eat lunch and Zhi had a meeting.... I husled my bag for my cellphone to call ani, before I could hit the dial button, the vomit made its way up and I had to rush for the toilet bowl.
thereafter, I called Ani. The nurse left a voicemail on my hp. I asked ani to call her back telling her that i had just vomit. the nurse asked me to take the medication for nausea, but only zhi knew where it was.

Then zhi came back. A few minutes after that, I vomitted again.... that's what you'll get from eating medicine with an empty stomach. Drank the nausea medicine and no more vomitting after that. Phew!!!

the rest of the days was spent lying on the bed, bitting on tea bags, going to the rest room, compressing side of my neck with ice, and drinking the medicine after 4 to 6 hours.

The left side seemed to be more painful and swollen than the right. May be it's more difficult to extract *shrug*

I hope the pain would subside after Saturday at the very latest. I need to get back to studying! And I really hope I won'd get dry socket .

downtown

Went to visit the State capitol on Saturday. Finally, I got to see it and what's inside---supreme courts, history of oklahoma... all those american gov. stuffs... then, to our surprise, you can actually hold a birthday party there!!!

The dome shape of the capitol building reminded me of the architecture in italy.

I don't know why some people would think that visiting the state capitol is a waste of time and stupid... to me going to the mall is a more waste of time! I'm happy to finally be able to go to visit other places besides the malls at OKC. Now, I can say that I've been to Oklahoma!

but we did went for about an hour of shopping while waiting for the sky to get dark to go to downtown. We were at loss, following a bunch of people who turned out to be going to Ford center to watch some concert =.= But finally found the downtown and dissapointing it was to see that the night life had not begun (began at 9pm I supposed, we were there till 8pm). Not that i'm into the night life, but if the place were buzzing with people, you could soak in the atmosphere, like in san antonio.

Anyway, we searched for some places to eat dinner, but thought of the price then decided to go somewhere else. We went to Olive Garden! finally get to eat at olive garden. haha... italian food. But when I looked through the menu, I got a little "xian" of the food there as some of the pasta can be found at pistol pizza... may be it's nicer (the alfredo was nicer, duh! ) but i still it's somewhat the same type. so went on to have a "meal set" consisted of lasagna, alfredo pasta and chicken parma... (dunno how to spell >.<)

oh, we went to cheesecake factory too!!! I like the caramel pecan cheesecake! I think it's about ordering the right cake for your taste bud.

i don't even know where to start now that i have stopped blogging for a long time.

On feb 23, we had International bazzar. Went rather well for us. People came in throngs at times and the number were more than expected!

Came march, more exams before my spring break! Still unsure where to go, but i definitely not spending a week of break here in stillwater. I need a break not only from the hectic yet monotonous days of college, but also from the contrasting slow-pace, quiet, jaded city of stillwater. Hence, i need to get out! haha...

cultural night... i just want to be "backstage helper' and/or the audience now. After last year, for me if i were to take part, i want to dance. Not that i like to dance. I totally hate it! and can't dance, but if i were to be on the stage, i might as well go all out and dance! I dont' want to just sit there and stone in a traditional costume and heavy make up. No more of that for me. Once is enough. I'm trying to find ways to avoid their prying eyes and constant request. How do you turn down request from insistent people NICELY?

I gained a better understanding of myself thanks to my zhi. It's not a sudden revelation. I know it exist, but I chose to ignore it for many years, nonetheless unconsciously feedng it. With my anxiety and pessimism as its water and warmth/ sulight, it sprouted from a seed and bloomed into a plant. How far has the roots grow? Is it deep enough to not to be able to pull it off anymore?

I think the first thing I have to do is to stop it's growth. Stop feeding it! Step by step, it would hopefully wither and died... How long? It's hard to say. it takes time. Some are stronger than the other. I think this one would take a bit of time. it's been growing healthily for years.

my two specially made b'day cakes *teary eyed*


my specially made b'day ice cream ^^

21!!!!

Liverpool beat Inter Milan!!! 2-0!!! =D Gerrard scored too and I loved his goal! I'll take it as a present for the birthday girl--- Me! =P haha...

I got 2 cakes for my birthday and both were homemade *teary eyed* Ani, ana made me one and my "special someone" made me another. The cake or rather how it was decorated really surprised me. It was better than I thought! hehe... Thank you ^^ Ani, ana's cake was nice too! Had 21 made out in chocolate cubes and 3 layers!!!

You mentioned that i had two this year to make up for last year. May be you're right! Really enjoyed last night! hehe...

I really enjoyed my birthday this year!!!
Thank you for all the wishes, the cakes , the presents and more importantly thank you for all of your sincerity for making this day special and memorable! T.T

thank you sooo much!

A bouquet of roses... Never thought I would be receiving it... with a vase , wrapped nicely in red rice paper and trasparent plastic... along with it was a small exquisite box of Godiva chocolate ^^
I could only smiled happily!


Finally a relax week after what I should say a crazy and tiring week. Four exams in five days not to mention having to fall ill before the second exam! So tired I was till I had to spend the weekend recuperating (actually, I spent the whole week... slacking around not really wanting to study =P)

I haven't been following soccer much lately... liverpool aren't performing so well... and on tuesday, they will meet Inter Milan... CL... gone! Fanished! the inkling of hope for a consolation for this season! Liverpool is still dear to my heart so to make the thought of losing worse, it had to be on Tuesday, Feb. 19!!!! ARGH!!!!

Anyway, I hope I will get a compensation! I know YOU know! :P

3 weeks of class has gone and I wished it was 3 months instead. I just wanted this semester to be over and done with. Not sure why I felt this way, but i just not enjoying the classes and especially work as much so far. I'm really hoping for a new and better job next semester. I'm tired of making pizzas! haha...

First exams are coming and I would be having an exam on CNY's Eve and two on CNY. Great! *sigh* No ang pao again -.- but I'm pretty sure that this year's CNY would be much much better than the last. At least I know I would not be so lonely :D

It's only been 2 months, but I felt as if it should have been longer...

First week of school was gone... And i'm actually rather worried for my courses. All seemed to be more difficult and demanding... may be except for my managerial accounting as so far it's not as difficult as financial accounting and many people told me that it is easier than financial (i hope so too).
And then there's work on Thursday night and Friday aftre school. Wanted to change my job but so far no other job, so i guess i just had to wait patiently. *sigh*

Tommy A. has gone back to Houston and he might be going back to Indo. 0.o! I know... so wasted! But that's life you don't know how it would turn up to be... so unpredictable. i wished him all the best! We had a small farewell party for him and he was being showered by beer! haha...

I got a new roommate alr! She's aaron's gf from korea! My fridge smells of kimchi now. haha...
Thinking back, i think this would be the first time ever I shared an apt. with a stranger. Well, not really a stranger. i mean i don't really know her... We just met a few times. But she seems nice and we'll see how things are. I'm both excited and apprehensive having a roomie, but i know my bank account is smiling. Haha...

School again tmr... =(

Stuck at home for new year!!! countdown on msn... how fun! yeah, u all should try it =p studied for my 3 weeks internet course. Last exam on Friday!!! then,

jan 4 came and the 3 weeks were finally over! happy...

but...

the school started...

and what a good start by missing the bus!
so decided to walk to catch another color bus, but still missed that bus... ended up having to walk to my class in BUS which was sooo far away! Came in a little late... eyes tired (who won't if u slept late -.- n ...) then huff and puff and tired I came to class only to get chided! Like i want to be late, like i want not to be able to get "good" seats! And was my fatigue, especially in my eyes and breathlessness so difficult to notice?????

... doom sgniws...
Sometimes I just wonder if I'm being too sensitive or not sensitive enough...
Sometimes I just wonder if I'm expecting too much or you're not doing enough...

*sigh*