it was the first day.
good, i would say.
although my course mates.
i have yet to relate.
but time will tell,
and soon it'll be well.
however for now it seems,
i need time to dream.

Risque

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And a phone to the other
And I can't get a hold of her
And what's a crush to do?
What's a crush to do when he can't get through?

Medically speaking you're adorable
And from what I hear you're quite affordable
But I like them pricey
So exaggerate and t-t-t-t-t-t-trick me
Pretty please, just trick me
Pretty please

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And a phone to the other
And I can't get a hold of her
And what's a crush to do
What's a crush to do when he can't get... through?

I'm obsessed and stressed with this mess
I can't think of things
To write down
To type down
And these fingertips are moving faster than these lips
So you can only imagine how jealous my mouth is
So you can only imagine how jealous my mouth is

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And a phone to the other
And I can't get a hold of her
And what's a crush to do
What's a crush to do?
What's a crush to do?

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And what's a crush,
And what's a crush to do?

Yeah (yeah)
Yeah
Ohhhh
I turn on a dime, spin me around
So you can shine, shine right now
We'll even have a crowd
We'll make this purchase count

Medically speaking you're adorable
And from what I hear you're quite affordable
But I like them pricey
So exaggerate and t-t-t-t-t-t-trick me

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And what's a crush to do?
And what's a crush to do?

I got birds in my ears (I got birds in my ears)
And a devil on my shoulder (And a devil on my shoulder)
And what's a crush to do
When he can't get through, when he can't get a hold of her?

What's a crush, what's a crush to do?



-Cute Is What We Aim For-

some guys are just so not worth it.

night out with zhen and nat was good.
so physically exhausted though.
but it was good just chatting.

the history boys.
interesting.
i like.

thoughts.
never ceases.
never stops.
uncomprehending.
and yet, a myriad.
however, still a total enthrallment.

i will continue.
to soak in bliss.

im not exceptionally happy today. despite the fact that the news that reached my ears yesterday evening caused me to be estatic, the events that unfolded as the day went on dissipated that very joy.
i was so pissed with that bus conductor. he really made the beginning of the day awful. not gonna go into details here. but if you wanna know, i can tell you when i see you next.
but aaron and shawn really made my time in TP much better. i didnt expect company. really, i didnt. somehow they were like God-sent dudes to make my morning a whole lot happier.
hmmm met up with zhen. cabbed. ex. but i needed that break. we spoke. we laughed. we ate. we drank. we walked. we shopped. we enjoyed. im just glad i got someone like her. well, like we always say, "i know you love me.". hahaha.
im just feeling extremely tired now, but i may be meeting them for the usual wed event.. but not sure. see how it goes.
and nat babe, im here for you.
even if it means just to listen.

i can see it in your eyes

you mean all of what you say

i remember so long ago

see, i felt that same way

seeing the children today really made my day.. they just make everything seem alright.
feel real sad for nana though. i wouldnt know how much it would hurt her as a mother, but if it was me, as only a friend, i would be extremely upset and disappointed.. but oh wells. i dont have any advice to give her. all i can do is listen, and pray.

ron came down for lunch.. haha gosh, the weather was so humid! and HOT. seriously. we were perspiring under the sweltering heat. moreover, we had sambal fried rice for lunch. HEATY. haha but it was good having him around. took some time to chat.. thanks darling!

met up with the usuals for dinner.. hmmm.
zhen, kat, nat, nia, wen, joyce, manda.
swensens? ice cream.
caught up with a few of them..
gossip. HOT gossip.
and the things we spoke of in that small restaurant was obscene and raw. i wasnt surprised to see the change in the faces of the staff there.. haha it was absolutely hilarious. but in any case, time spent with them was worthwhile. oh! and FINALLY. we can meet and HEAR each other. no need for screaming and competing against loud music at zouk.

something triggered the thinking all over again. once again, i thought of *. darn, it was like a flood of memories rushing into my head, telling me that though it was awesome, it will never work out. like NEVER. cos we just dont click. hahaha oh wells. i'll get over it.

okay, finally, i conclude for the day that..
I NEED TO STOP CONSUMING CHOCOLATE.
in all honesty, i do.
before i start getting zits.
hahaha LOL.

:)

today was nice.

van, ron, aaron, anthony.
time spent with you guys was good.
CORN! CHIPS! GREEN TEA! SUSHI! CAR RIDES! SANDWICHES!
pity the R wasnt with us..
she and her mahjong.
FOREVER lah.
haha but then again, you guys are so into mahjong too.. oh wells. i dont quite understand how that very activity can amuse a bunch a people and leave them glued to their seats.
hahaha oh wells.

and daddy and i have come up with this fantastic layout with regards to our home! we sketched out the floor plan of our living room after supposedly rearranging the furniture, and ta-daa!
beauty. simplicity. space.
i like.

hmmm alrighty. i just hope this week will be super awesome! gonna meet up with the usuals, the VAAAR, and the skit team. and im like awaiting THE CALL. as to whether my dream to enter public school will be realised or not. so, wait i will. and that NOKIA CARE CENTRE better call me soon or i'll just flip. it's been more than a month! poops.

okay. tonight must rest early! long day tmr. and i miss the children so much. its really odd.. cos i was only away on fri, and yet.. the feeling of not being there to take care of them is surprisingly exasperating. weird. oh wells.

good evening loves!

darn.
fever.
aches.

hurt.
over.
stop.

tired.
sleepy.
tonight.

and happy birthday daddy.

im in shock as to how everything unfolds. as to how situations leave me confounded with questions that baffle my every thought. im left stranded trying to find my way out of this stormy sea of perplexity. its getting tiring.. i dont even know why i bother.
i just want to be happy.
in any case, the call gave me so much hope. now, the only thing i can do left to do is do my best and leave it in the hands of God.

but thoughts they change
and times they rearrange
dont know who you are anymore

hmmm, the day's been good. it was just really good seeing all those familiar faces that make going to church on sundays oh-so-worthwhile. well, i totally didnt realise that class was not combined today! jenna and i like totally freaked. fortunately, gerry and jo helped us out, so we split the class by half.. the lesson went well, i would say, though i didnt do any teaching or talking.. maybe thats why it went alright. initially, i was delegated a part, but i was so stressed to the point that i told jo "i cant.". i usually dont say no. but today, i was feeling so down and demoralized at how little i knew, and how little i had to say with regards to the seven sacraments. and the pain didnt make things any better. oh wells. after class there was a meeting for the camp skit.. it went well, i would say. i just hope the cast that God provides will prove to be the awesome-est. its so important.. so yeah.

after a super lunch, the rest of the catechists and i attended this workshop which supposedly was supposed to provide us with knowledge on how to carry out a lesson. basically, teaching us presentation skills.. to my surprise, i felt that the speaker himself had loads to learn instead. oh wells. the bottom line is, i now know more of what i should not do. in any case, i just enjoyed spending time listening to different people's opinions with regards to the afternoon spent.

hmmm i wanted so much to see him, but.. odd.

alrighty, gonna start work tmr. for a few weeks.. and im totally looking forward to may 5th! housewarming and bday at josh's. omg its been like so long since i last saw them.. i miss them so much like nonsense man. hahaha cant wait! and josh says im still the carebear he used to know.. that really made me smile.

anyways..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLINGS!
kathie ho ye teng.
daisy joan khng hui shan.
hope you girls enjoyed yourselves today.

okay, gonna grab some dinner now..
take care loves.

buddy-G, i told.

and things are different now..

but at least i got it out of my system.



hmmm my bio-clock is a little bit late.
okay, not a little.. a whole lot.
its like, i used to sleep at 12?
now, its 4 am for me.
i have to change!
because..
im gonna start work soon.
LSH SGH.


went bowling with van and gerald ytd.. gosh, i was totally terrible at it lah! as in honestly. their average score was like at least 110+, and mine was... 50+? hahaha poopie i gotta train.. wonder where my parents' awesome bowling genes went to..

in any case, it was super awesome spending time with them..

alrighty, its time for me to head to bed.. got a super long day tmr, and i dont intend to sleep through it.

take care dearies!

VAAAR.

blog-hopping..
and a thought struck me.

VAAAR.
i really love you guys.
its just amazing how we found each other, and how God led me to you. in all honesty, i never thought i'd ever be able to build solid friendships with you guys.. it just never occurred to me that it was possible. but now i know how it feels like to have you all around. you guys really make my life meaningful.

VANESSA.
ms buaya. wahh all these years i've known you and yet we failed to find each other.. until now. 2007 really rocks with you and the rest of VAAAR lah. but seriously, im so glad i've got you.. someone i can share my life with, talk crap to, be myself and not hide. its just something really special, and i really treasure you. lets meet more, laugh more, and indulge! you'll forever be my indulgence buddy.

AARON.
chua. it started with the hugs. hahaha no idea how such a simple act could actually result in such a wonderful friendship. i remember i always saw you as the tall one (with the taller brother). but now, you're no longer just the TALL one. you're my FRIEND. and when i say FRIEND, i dont mean anything flimsy. i mean SOLID. hahaha okay, dont think dirty, darling.

AARON.
ron. mpm lead me to you. the hi-byes made us friends. facilitation made you a buddy. its super amazing how each step we took slowly built up this bridge. i really enjoy the long chats with you, the trying-to-figure-out-what-dirty-things-you're-saying moments. its been awesome lah, really. haha ron ron ron.. you need to help me 'train' and stop me from saying things with puns.

RACHEL.
we've known each other for like.. almost 6 years? and all that time we never really spoke. until 2007. its like, WOW. i really have no idea how we started journeying with each other.. all the retarded calls and hilariously silly antics. not to mention our BLUR-NESS. its been so much fun. and I KNOW I MAKE YOU LAUGH(haha so random + ego). but in any case, lets keep this friendship going.

VAAAR.
you guys really make 2007 special.
you guys really make everything oh-so-fun.
I LOVE YOU!

xoxoxo
drea
120407

YAWN.

i've said stupid things.

im completely drained.
exhausted.
though i didnt really do much..
well, just got back home.
was at mich's chalet..
hmmm zhen joyce and i just made a fun din.
it was good.
but...
just hope mich is feeling better.

sentosa made me perspire.
woah, the sun was scorching, i tell ya.
but it was good all the same.
and carl's was like the ultimate!
shiok.

okay, a huge shoutout to all the birthday girls..
AUDREY!
MICHELLE!
GERALDINE!
JANE!
you guys are getting older man.
hahaha LOL.

okay, im gonna get some sleep now.
need energy for tonight.

:)

ALRIGHTY GOOD DAY EVERYONE.

the final week.

time to enjoy.

:)

oh no. i did let myself get affected, and i fell a little. i cant believe all the stupid things i said and did.. i never meant it to seem D, i just needed answers.. but i shall not seek anymore. otherwise things may just get awry.. thats the last thing i want.
drey said it could be 60%.. sigh. what if it is? then that is really bad. real real bad. i should never feel anything above 30% if i know it wont work out.. and yet.. i.. dont know. argh!
time to stop.
time to move on.

yawn. feeling really tired, only had four hours of sleep last night.. i didnt realise how i tired i was until the moment when i settled down and just sat. my body totally shut down after that. I NEED SLEEP.

hmmm.. in any case, HAPPY EASTER everyone.

the feeling is like.. wahh.
i really dont know why it feels that way.
hmmm anyways, the past few days have been pretty interesting.. did a lot of things that i've never before, and i enjoyed every single moment of it. but it did result in feelings that i didnt expect.. weird.
its like, you know it wont work out, and that it never will, no matter how much the signs may say something, it could very well be your misinterpretation. and to go all out to do something special, only to deliver it without much fancy, makes it so not fulfilling. but no regrets. all i hope for is to keep in line, and not do anything stupid that may affect whatever is already there. i mean, i should never expect anything. for it is only when you least expect something that it becomes meaningful and more memorable.
and so, i leave this confusing entry with yet again an unsolved mess in my head. a mess that i wish to untangle but if i do so, i may just fall apart. gosh, i hope God helps me out here a little before i fall too deep and start thinking too much. i refuse to hit the state of a head full of white. and so, i shall live in my mental cell and try to make sense of the things that affect my oh-so-easily-affected mind.

the time i'd spent doing the things i did these past few days have created feelings that i've never felt before.. and its making me a tad bit confused. well, its nothing big.. just that home doesnt feel like what it used to, and different people are starting to make a change in my life.. i dont know how to accept the changes, and the fact that what people feel about me may not necessarily be how i feel about them.. its just making a whole load of disorganized sense. okay okay i dont think im making things easier to understand, so i shall not brood over it..

well, zhen mentioned that she browsed through my journal in the hopes of seeing her name.. hmmm seeing how we've been friends for so long, i shall just indulge her a little bit..
SIOK CHING IS MY FRIEND.
hahahaha lameness.

and its 20 hours more til someone's 21st!
hmmm. but poops, soon it'll be our turn to grow old.
oh wells.

i am going to try to sleep soon.

met up with wen, mich and joyce for dinner today. hmmm, after our evening of thai dining and window clothes/shoe shopping, we finally settled our butts down onto the couches at starbucks.. mmm iced caramel macchiato! yum.
and so, we began our random, undirected conversations which lead us to one main issue.. and that was.. AGE.
it suddenly struck me how fast time was zooming by. we've reached this point whereby we either cross the line into adulthood or remain in our perpetually happy teen zone. and i dont know whether im ready to cross it or not..
so basically, i was just sharing with them how i felt about the whole big 2-0.. that its really rushing straight into our faces, and i just want it to stop!
gosh. the moment we hit our twenties, we have so much to accomplish..
build our reputation..
get a stable job..
find a significant other..
produce significant others..
hahaha just so many things to accomplish in a decade, and it definitely doesnt seem like a lot of time to begin with.
okay, you may think that i/we are thinking way too far, and its pretty realistic actually. alright, i dont know how to explain myself, but whatever it was, joyce and i were like totally freaking out with the whole idea of leaving teenage life.. woah! rush.
hahaha and jiawen mentioned that 'age' is just a number, but this number means a whole lot. hahahaha.
oh wells. all i can say is, we've gotta learn to embrace the age issue! and kiss it when it comes.

okay, wed.. come soon.