shabs.

you always make me smile.

and im so glad we've come this far.

happy 21st my dear.

love.

hmm.
usually i wouldnt care less about idol results, but i still feel that jonathan should have won the title.
reasons?
1. he can sustain his energy for longer periods of time.
2. he's more versatile.
3. his charm overpowers that of hady's.
4. i dont think he's cute, but he still has appeal.
oh well. its just idol.

laa laa laa.
today was awesome.
shabs, thanks for everything.
you're my bestest.
<3 <3 <3
love love love.

weeeee~
here's stuff i wanna get done by this year..
1. clubbing.
2. vacation.
3. ice skating.
4. croc pumps.
5. get organized.
6. pack my room.
7. go to the beach.
8. complete my dpt.
9. paint shabs's room.
10. dinner with ij peeps.

yup. alrighty, lazy to go on.
take care all.

i like hugs.
i like puppies.
i like the smell of roses.
i like people smiling.
i like photographs.
i like being with him.
i like my job.
i like my sisters.
i like lavender scented candles.
i like the sea breeze.
i like music.
i like fluffy clouds.
i like singing.
i like the way tink scurries.
i like warm sunshine.
i like kittens.
i like working with children.
i like the colour green.
i like the warmth of sincerity.
i like soft toys.
i like flowers.
i like my dad.
i like craft materials.
i like praise and worship.
i like raindrops.
i like to feel like im loved.
i like the taste of sweet chilli.
i like to relax.
i like my friends.
i like romantic dramas.
i like my mom.
i like a good cry once in a while.
i like God.
i like books with beautiful covers.
i like holding hands.
i like comfort.
i like my family.
i like rainbows.
i like twists.
i like now.

God.

Always here.

Never away.

My secret strength.

My hope.

The one who stays.

Thank goodness.

im happy now.
right at this very moment.
but the camp's gonna prove to be tough.
i've got responsibilities..
can i handle it?
hope so.
but in any case, im happy.
happy with the way things are now.
happy with the people in my life.
happy with being happy.
happy.

i need to make time for friends.

a dip in the pool really does wonders.

feeling much better now.. but i got a feeling i wont feel that way for long. really hope ** calls.. okay gonna wait now.. feeling super tired, and cold too. oh well. take care loves.

i feel so lost. like im all alone and there's no one there to cheer me up, that kinda thing.. i dunno, maybe its just that time of the month when my emotions just go berserk. haha my previous post seemed pretty happy eh? but thinking back, i dont think i was feeling the way i wrote. gosh, smth is seriously wrong with me man. i hate hate hate feeling so low. its making me depressed. okay, not the kind that wants to commit suicide whatsoever. sigh im getting stupid. this post is so unlike me.. but man, i cant possibly keep everything in. argh headache headache headache. school's been bad. why is there so much difficulty being happy in school? man, it annoys me. i hate bring the mediator. why cant people just solve things on their own and approach the other party instead of making me sandwiched. argh i hate hate hate hate. the worst part is we're all training to be teachers. why cant people just maintain reputations so that no one will shun them or leave them out. argh headache lah. people are people. and man, sometimes i really hate myself. thats a seriously bad thing man. bad bad bad. i just cant control saying certain things, and eventually, it irritates my loved ones. shit lah, im so annoyed with myself. annoyed annoyed annoyed. damn, i think i've got serious issues. and shabs wont pick up my call. maybe he's sleeping.. i hope. gosh, i can just slap myself silly at this rate. i think i need a swim. i need to cool down so that i can think straight. im so glad i've got a pool downstairs. argh whats the matter with me. i dont understand how a person can feel so many emotions at a single moment. angry, frustrated, upset, tangled, low, tired, insecure, dejected, exhausted. darn, i need a break.
break break break break break.

the world is small.

guess that makes me smaller.

but im no smaller then you.


well, my life may be physically tiring of late, but it sure is fulfilling in so many other ways. i really appreciate all the simplicities of life..
the air i breathe.
the water i drink.
the food i eat.
the people i meet.
the body i have.
the mind i use.
just everything.

whoopee! camp's this weekend. pretty scared though.. cos i might have to do smth i might be uncomfortable doing.. aahhh i dunno lah. im so screwed. in any case, school's been good. feeling really tired though. like super super tired. must be cos of work too. but work's great! the children are awesome. haha im so glad im in this line.

laa laa laa.
i need to meet so many people..
dates!
coffee with wena and gerald!
chicken rice with mel!
dinner with nia!
clubbing with the rc peeps!
shopping with drey!
so many, so many!

hmm miss him loads now.
sailing.
why?! so often.
*blergh*

okay, gonna shower.

love love love!