Hong Kong

My last post did elicit some form of response from my readers so I shall clear the air up. Like some movie trailer, it was meant to stir up some controversy. :)

Anyway, this was my character in a short film project for a group of students at Ngee Ann poly. My very first film! The group was given a short dialogue which they needed to expand on and turn into a short film. So, my character was that of a 30 year old lecturer (which I absolutely don't look like), who has an affair with his student and impregnates her. Desperate to keep the affair under wraps, he tries to avoid her in school but finds out that she's pregnant in the female toilet. It ends with the student breaking up the relationship while the lecturer stands there, shocked, only to be greeted by another female entering the toilet. I'm too lazy to explain the later parts but if you're nice enough, I'll let you watch it once I get my hands on the finished product. ;) By the way, Liz Chay went something like "the role suits you perfectly!" when I told her about it. -____-"""

It was a great experience though I had my doubts about the entire thing, having heard scary stories from dear Chrystal. Most of the crew were late to begin with and they didn't even bother with make-up so I wound up looking like, ah well, myself. The first half of the day was a little boring, since it only involved the female lead. Things got interesting after lunch though. The scene was set in the female toilet, and later in a cubicle. We spent the next half of the day in the female toilet - for once, it didn't few wrong to go in one. Haha (that sounds wrong). A quarter of that was spent squashed in a single cubicle, three of us - camerawoman, female lead and I in an intense scene. Really cool stuff. We had problems at times though - the automatic toilet bowl kept flushing whenever the camerawoman moved resulting in a few NG takes - I named the place "flushing meadows".

I learnt quite a bit from the whole experience. Didn't know filming required the cast to rehash the scenes so many times to film from the different perspectives; the importance of that clipboard which actually is a backup for records of the recording timings on the tape; the fun of it all and getting to meet people who are future directors.

Ah yes, the group consisted of Jonathan - who is Zhu Hou Ren's son (re: The Unbeatables I); Sophia, a spunky English-Chinese mix who views Islam and Christianity as largely similar; Kimberly, from Bedok Tampines Bethesda who dabbles with musicals and other stuff; an emo guy (can't remember his name) who's really an emo; and a girl (neither can I remember hers), who is absolutely against prosperity gospel (and I stand by her on this one) who said "God is not our maid" that is now etched in my heart. Fantastic people. I love film and drama - ah well...

So the Christmas drama is over, my passport is filled up after going to Hong Kong, Macau, Shenzhen and back, and Christmas is tomorrow. Malaysia is next - my third holiday this year including Thailand in Nov. I need to find a job. I need to start mugging. I could SO get used to this life.

No. I will not turn into a slob. I need a job but no more calling up 500 people in 3 days and pasting 500 envelopes. No. No. No.

Confessions of a Broken Man

I have something to confess.

I had an affair with a student of mine. Now she's pregnant. It was meant to be a secret - if not , why then call it an affair? It was meant to be kept underground, the thrill manefesting itself in the process, of acting as non-chalantly as possible in the presence of the other in school. Yet the moment we were safely tucked into the arms of privacy...

What am I to do now?

Still busy

Spent the last 3 days most fruitfully and i have a ton of things to say.

Unfortunately, having spent all my energy in the past 3 days, I will blog tomorrow.

My eyebags need support.

Busy Busy Busy

Busy, Busy, Busy Week,
I feel like a Buzzing Busy Bee.

Sister's back, mommy's home,
no more peace, in my home.

Drama drama, everyday drama

winston drama papa,

amy drama mama,

drama drama, so much drama.

I go crazy "la la la".

Winston's random thought of the day

"Who arranged the alphabet?"

Ans: A musician?

Vinna's reponse to that

"-__________________________-

Amy,"My friend Xiao long's fighting tonight in a caged muay thai boxing match!"

Me,"Is he xiao long nu's boyfriend?

Adele's and Amy's reponse to that

""-__________________________-

""-__________________________-

I've been on a cold joke spree lately.

Globalised citizen?

My mom came back from Zurich (Switzerland, for those who don't know) after an eight day business trip. She arrived home at around 8, went shopping for groceries and came back at around 10.30, about the time I had just awakened. She proceeded to unpack her luggage, grab a nap, wake up, pack her luggage and trudged off to the airport to catch a flight to Shanghai at 3.15pm. Total time spent at home - an estimated 6 hrs, minus time spent outside doing grocery shopping. Now this is what I call a global citizen.

Apparently, my mom is on her way to being exempted from paying income tax. As long as you are not in the country 50 percent of the time, and if you're overseas on the last day of the year and the first of the next, you're exempted. My dad has been to the airport about half a dozen times within this month alone, but he's always there to send someone off. This shall change next month when we go for a family holiday in Hong Kong! Yeah! Shopping and eating and shopping and eating. Xiang1 Gang3!

The yin-yang balance in the house is once again way off. (No, it's not because I do not consider my sister a girl, it's just that she's in Thailand building houses for the poor. The men in the house concur that my poor sister will be assimilated into the community, becoming a victim of her own fussiness over food. She is likely to join the ranks of starving children in Ethiopia.)Testerone floods our corridors. But, I am not complaining. At the moment, this place seems like a euthopia for the house has never been so peaceful and conducive for studying. Life is good.

I had my encounter with Mike and Mikey yesterday. Little did I know that they were like twins, like the twins on the Amazing Race. It was a... a... I-don't-know-what-word-to-insert encounter. Two blackouts occurred before I arrived so I don't know what went on between the two of them - are they electrifying or what! To be continued...

Mike

Last night, I met Mike. Mike picked me up whilst I was checking him out, though to me, he was as straight as a rod. Mike was already hooked up, but that made him absolutely electrifying, cutting a sleek silhouette against a dark backdrop, a gorgeous body.

Through the course of the night, as we "interacted", Mike was fantastic. He was real sensitive and made so much noise! Mike was loud at times , and soft at others, sometimes verging on a screechingly high pitch. That was the feedback Mike gave to me, everytime I pushed up his buttons too hard. Handling Mike was easy - he could, with some assistance, stand on his own, positioned in a 45 degree upward angle. Also, I could turn him on by pushing the correct buttons ;).

I tried many different positions with Mike - at first, he was in front, later behind me. Both of us experimented with each other to see what was the best combination, to achieve the most desired effect.

I had a great time with Mike last night. Can't wait to meet him again - this time, with another friend of his. Wheee!

Thailand!

I'm typing this entry at a computer terminal down at the lobby of my hotel. It's called Bangkok City Suite and thus far, it has been a pleasant trip. Apparently, they used to have free internet for guests but this has ben, unfortunately discontinued. Thus, the clock ticks off a second each time I type, my free use expiring in 30 minutes. Despite the scarcity of time, I shall though, take time to go through my trip thus far.

I fast running out of cash, having spent three quarters of it shopping. Going to chak tuk chak market is like a bargain hunter's haven and I came back with so much stuff, I think my luggage is going to go overweight. Chak tuk chak is huge, HUGE HUGE HUGE as compared with anything in Singapore and the stuff is really cheap. It's a huge maze and going back to one shop would be almost impossible so we had to adopt a "if you like it, buy it" attitude. Singyong's rationale is that you can't go very wrong with a purchase of only a few dollars. But purchases do add up and I bought so much that my KP and Cheeks had to lend a hand in carrying my stuff. I'm almost out of cash - the bright side is, my Christmas shopping for this year is done, at a fraction of the possible cost. I shan't however, due to time constraints, elaborate on my purchases so question me upon my return.

We woke up at around 11-12 today after a night of partying at Hollywood Awards, a club with a live band and concert. Didn't really enjoy the experience - true, there were skimpily clad women and the likes but cigarette smoke, thumping music and long hours plus fatigue don't make a good combination. The experience kinda left me a little drunk and served as a good reminder as to why I don't club. I just don't like it.

WE arrived in BKK at around 11 due to a flight delay from congestion at the airport runway, circling the area for a while. Nothing noteworthy.

On day 2, we were supposed to head down to chak tuk chak market but it was closed, apparently due to a bomb suspicion. It kinda set off alarm bells but the taxi driver that we approached, who also was the one to break (this heartbreaking) piece of news to us, said it so nonchalantly and comically that the whole situation seemed rather absurd. He said something like this," Chak tuk chak closed. Boom (he meant bomb) Boom. Boom! Closed.) Upon further enquiry from the staff, we confirmed the news and thus headed off to MBK for a day of shopping.

MBK is highly overrated, or maybe it's because there's just SO many shops that you are overwhelmed by a barrage of goods and shops everywhere. IT's so huge, you just don't know where to start. So, we didn't buy anything - except to have Japanese food. Later, we went to this shop which everything was going at 50% and splurged.

Enough of the shopping experience. At Hollywood Awards, KP got picked up by a few girls. She was ALL OVER him. I found it terribly amusing so I kept looking in their direction. She caught my glance and invited me over but once there, I didn't know what to do. Winston stupid Winston! Don't even know what to do around girls. But yeah, she just kept coming back for KP. Haha. Dirty dancing etc. Terribly amusing - my first time experience. Anyway, KP is a babe magnet - all the girls seemed to want to grab him - leaving me alone. Sigh, just says SO much about my looks.

KP bought me a belated birthday gift today at this gift shop call LOFT. I now have a badge that says "I can turn from 0 to bitch in 6.38 secs" bleahx.

Gtg, time's running out.

20 years ago

20 years ago, while I was still looking like this:


Ain't i adorable?! I think I was the cuttest little thing on earth; who could ever resist my cute little charms?

I may have been singing:

For a moment like this
Some people spent two lifetimes,
For a moment like this
Some people search forever,
For that one special kiss
Oh, I can't believe it's happening to me
Some people wait a lifetime,
For a moment like this

OHHHH, LIKE THIS

OHHHH, YEAH, 'cuz people search for every moment yeah.

Some people wait a lifetime,
For a moment like this.

Ohhhhh, like this.

-----

The last part sounds a little orgasmic if you know what I mean but hell yeah, I've waited a lifetime to ORD and tis day has finally arrived!

F-R-E-E-D-O-M!

Yes people, there is still reservist but don't remind me of that yet so I can enjoy this moment of bliss.

Back to reality.

As a male Singapore citizen, I am almost like a piece of property. The government knows everything about me, down to the nitty gritty details. They know where I live, my grades, my school, and goodness me maybe even things that I don't know about myself! They require me to report to them every time I leave the country and threaten me with the prospects of getting locked up in a claustrophobic cell should I fail to take my fitness test. It's amazing how they have everything down in their system, making use of the gateway to the country ie. the airport to catch NSmen and defaulters.

I understand that I have to serve my country but do such draconian measures have to be implemented? Having been through and suffered so much in the 1 yr and 10 months of my NS life, why won't they cut us some slack?

Crap.

Happy Birthday to me

Each year, my birthday seemed to be the worst day of my life - no one except my family kind of knew that I was born on that day and it was rare to receive a birthday greeting. I treated each sms I got with much gratitude and I would be on the verge of tearing out of happiness knowing that someone actually remembered. Till today, I still keep the birthday messages that people sent me over the past few years.

I guess everyone just wants to be loved and remembered, to know that someone acknowledges their existence - God wired each and every person in this way, there's no doubt about it. Over the years, I always wanted to be remembered but yet made no effort to give. And every year, I would hope that I would step home to a surprise birthday party or something. I remembered my sister's church friends plan a surprise party and as I stood there, I wished so much to be in her shoes, to know that I had close friends who would go that extra mile to make me feel special on my special day.

I've not had a cake in many years - I can't recall the last time someone sang Happy Birthday to me. Each year, I grew older and that special day would just flit by like any another day, and I would wallow in self-pity, feel unloved and that the world was a cold, cold place or rather, I was an insignificant being, more insignificant than any other. As I kinda grew older, I grew to hate my birthday since it always brought disappointment and tears, resigning myself to look beyond the superficiality of such "special" occassions and to try to focus on making people happy. But ultimately, while making others happy, I would always secretly wish to be in that position.

On hindsight, I had always overlooked the people around me who actually remembered. Grandma never forgot my birthday, my other uncle and one or two close friends. I never considered myself lucky, treating that meal with my family as perfunctory, neglecting other less fortunate people who didn't even have a family to begin with. Ah well, it's easier to wallow in self pity than to open my eyes to see the world around me.

This year was different. Though I didn't really want to turn 20, it's the best birthday I've had so far. Grandma went to lengths to buy me a choc tiramisu cake; my cast members, thanks to Kenneth, celebrated with a breadtalk cheese cake, complete with candle and imaginary flame. I originally had thought the actual day would pass quietly - since we'd already celebrated on Sunday, and was, admittedly, tempted to cancel rehearsal, find a few buddies and go out. Fortunately, I reasoned what a better way it would be to be serving God and having fun with my great drama team. I honoured God and was blessed by Him in return.

To the people around me, my family - sis, grandma, dad, mom etc. bryan, keng piang, chin leong, min hui, sam, sing yong, luke, joshua nair (thanks for the meal), jonathan wan, liz chay, chun wee, doreen, junming, jerald, law, Renhe, the drama team: kenneth, grace, vinna, kris, kenneth c, joel, clement and everyone else (please forgive me) for celebrating with me and making me feel special. I have been blessed by everyone on this day which I mark my 20th.

To top it off, my grandma struck lottery with my birth cert no. so I get another angbao. Yay!

Muackz!

What a difference a second makes. I am, officially, no longer a teen. I have emerged from the digit 1 and have joined the club of the twenties! It's a bitter-sweet moment - I looked forward to it because it would mean I ORD in 5 days. Oh well, it has finally arrived but here I am scrambling desperately for ways to deal with it.

I feel old!

I always had this feeling that once you hit 20, time just whizzes pass and before you know it, you'll be 30, employed and waiting to start a family. Then, by the time your kid comes out, you'll watch it grow up and then grandchildren and *poof* off to see your maker.

Sad.

It's halloween but over here, there ain't no trick or treatin'.

Thanks to everyone who remembered and sent me a message. Lurve you all, muackz!

My grandma bought me a cake, specially ordered from someone, so it's handmade. Chocolate tiramisu. Even though she was down with diarrhoea, courtesy of real hainanese chicken rice she had in China, she went all the way there to pick it up. My grandma loves me - vice versa. I'm her first and favouritest grandson (forgive me for using bad english). What can I say? I look at my baby pictures and I cannot deny that I was the cutest little thing on earth! Sadly, I'm not that anymore. :( But I love my grandma! Thank you mama!

Grandma gave me an angbao too. It was full of Thai baht because I'm going to Thailand next month. Last year, she gave me one full of yuan because I was going to China for a holiday. Twice she said, "this is what i have left from my holiday travels. I give it all to you."

Had dinner at Lorong 8, one of my dad's favourite haunts since it's cheap - I didn't demand anything expensive lest he got pissed off. Nonetheless, the food was good, I had my favourite hot plate beancurd. Sizzle, sizzle, sizzle - I LURVE beancurd.

It seems like a birthday trend. I broke a cup - I toppled it over and it fell off the table and smashed into a million pieces, spilling tea all over my beloved pumas, which are quite new. Two years back, i flipped another cup over (but didn't break it) when I was having a birthday treat (hokkien mee - like WTH) at AMK hawker centre. Seems like MY Dad doesn't like to splurge.

A friend of mine told me that he dreamt that I passed away and the class received news of my funeral. How morbid. 2 days before my birthday. How foreboding. Thunder, lighting, pathetic fallacy anyone (Is that how you use that term, I've totally forgotten)?

Pics pics pics of me tiramisu kik.





Cut cake


my beloved grandma who bought me the cake

Me sis suggested I act cute - not to my dad though...

The 3 shot mode - Nice/Not so nice/literally uuhh-ggly

That's why there're 3 shots, choose the best ;)

I have nothing else to say.

I am speechless.

Channel 8 Drama

This happened some 5 minutes ago when my dad, sis and I were watching the final episode of the 9.00pm drama on channel 8.

Thomas Ong proposes to Ivy Lee. Obviously, he does so with a ring.

Dad: Aiyoh, so small (referring to the diamond)!

Me: It's not as if the one you bought mom was very big.

Sis: Haha, loser!

Oops. I'm such a bitch. Haha.

The air is killing me. I understand the need to slash and burn, but on this scale?! My throat is dry, the air is polluted, how bad can it get? And say, what if I go to Thailand and end up choking on smog?

I'm came up with the "sappy" idea this week. A friend of mine was planning a birthday celebration for his beloved and was thinking of doing up a puzzle. He asked me for advice. He had planned everything from dinner to candles - the works. Whilst discussing the no. of pieces etc. an idea struck me.

My Romantic Recipe

1. Finish the puzzle but leave one piece out.
2. Put that one piece in a small box, perhaps the kind of tiff and co. ring boxes. (don't use that one though, receipient might think it's a ring from tiff and co.!)
3. After dinner, present the gift.
4. Receipient opens and questions, "A puzzle piece?" (Obviously he/she knows what his/her birthday gift is...)
5. Bring out the unfinished puzzle and say, "This puzzle is like my love for you, but without you, it's incomplete."
6. Invite person to place in the final piece.
7. Reveal the reverse side of the puzzle, which has a love poem/song/letter written at the back.
8. Serenade/read out the message.
9. Request person to put his/her initials down, next to yours.
10. Place the finish puzzle in a frame.
11. Say, "This message for you, is between you and me. That makes it all the more special."
12. Watch and enjoy seeing the person melt into your arms.
13. Enjoy the night. ;)

I'm amazed at the things I come up with. I am such a romantic.

Happieee! I'm so happiee! I'm going to be free!

Forbidden City

I'm currently staying over a a friend's place, typing this entry in air-conditioned comfort, complemented by the huge fan swirling above me.

We went to watch Forbidden City last night, the "highly acclaimed" made in Singapore production that will be taken overseas. Managed to get the tickets at 20% off thanks to Joel Nah who's in the production team. He's a pianist - an extremely talented one for that matter and I think it's absolutely fantastic to be working for such a huge production. It's one of my dreams to actually do a musical, albeit one that still remains high above in the fluff of the clouds; unreachable.

Anyway, given that it was my first experience watching a production in the Esplanade theatre, it was well worth it. Our seats were in the foyer stalls, which were rather exclusive. Raised on platforms in a box for 4, the view was spectacular, and what I reckon, VIP seats. There was even this plague with the company which is a private sponsor on the left hand side of the box. Gloria, JL and I sat in them like VIPs, people streaming in wondering why the hell the group of us could afford the tickets. Hah! Oh well, I'm probably making a mountain out of a molehill but too me, the experience was well worth it.

The entire production was satisfactory; Kit Chan delivered a pitch-perfect performance with her crystal clear voice ; the songs had a Singaporean flavour to it; the transitions were smooth; the set was used effectively and Hossan Leong and Sebastian Tan added much comic relief to the entire show. As court scribes, they played the role of narrators, which helped to fill up the gaps and fast forward the story. Their "opera" performance narrating the formation of heaven and earth of hilarious and who can forget their "yin-yang" fans. Both delivered absolutely rib-tickling performances.

Despite the critics' reviews with regards to the storyline, personally, I felt it was good that they didn't deliver the whole sequence of events based on history books. Admittedly, it did get draggy in the second half and I found myself losing concentration in between a few yawns. It would have been better though if they chose to focus on and develop some of the more significant events. The scene where Cixi lays beside her son and wipes his brow could have been a more poignant moment - lingering on a little more with a few moments of silence would have delivered great dramatic effects.

Overall, it was a credible performance by our local actors. It is a local production that when, fine-tuned, could be worthy of something great on broadway. The thing about Singaporeans is that they always believe in something that has achieved success overseas before giving it due recognition. However, from the turn out, I believe it was well supported.

A pet peeve though was to see people still strolling in after the performance has started. Thankfully, our seats were elevated so there was little disturbance. It just goes to show how 'cultured' we are in some sense and I'm not even talking about the dress codes of some of the patrons. Goodness!!

Went to Lau Pat Sat for supper, then to Harry's after to chill out. Had only like 1.5-2 glasses of long island tea and I was already halfway to not walking straight. Crap. I suck - I guess it was because I didn't really eat much so the alcohol got to me. Oh well, must train. Haha.

ATEC is over!

After four hellish days that I thought would never end, I have finally crossed the largest hurdle, ATEC Stage 2. No amount of conditioning, which in the army translates into MORE outfields, can ever prepare anyone for another. The dread of having to go for one, the fear of having to traverse a swamp and so on. Personally, nothing could be worse than getting your boots wet.

More importantly, soldiers are constantly engaged in guerilla warfare against wild and highly evolved species of mosquitoes, capable of sticking their probiscus through the thick camouflage green material of their long 4. They feast on the worst possible places - the fleshy thighs, the succulent buns, the lips and how in the world did they think of the finger joints? It is a battle that is often lost and these tiny creatures humiliate us by turning us into circus monkeys, scratching every possible inch of our bodies and slapping ourselves in the face. By day, they taunt us by flying in our faces; by night, these mosquitoes mock us, incessantly buzzing around our ears as if they're saying, "na-nee-na-nee-poo-poo".

But, and it's a big BUT, it's over. No more outfields in my remaining days as an NSF!

Dragon Boating

I have this gut feeling that I'm a SNAG. Either that or I'm suffering from hormonal imbalances or menopause. Why do I say so? It seems that I can get really emotional upon seeing certain things, especially when I'm alone. The other day, while walking home from the bus interchange, this kid smiled and waved to me as I was crossing the zebra crossing. I felt warm and fuzzy and that life on earth was worth everything to live for; a few steps later, seeing a poor Indonesian maid sitting in a newly opened maid agency almost caused me to tear, seeing how they have to leave their families just to earn a living, depriving both themselves and their kids of a relationship. Why oh why am I so emotional? However, I must admit that my best scenes in some scripts are created at these very moments...

The battalion organised a dragon boat challenge to celebrate the battalion's anniversary on Friday and in part, to boost the morale of the soldiers in anticipation of the upcoming ATEC Stage 2 exercise. It's the final hurdle and no one can afford make mistakes. With the careers of commanders and regulars alike on the line, they were scrambling to give everyone a reason to do well for ATEC, perhaps conscious of how they have treated us thus far. And so, the entire battalion was allowed to go home for the night and head to Kallang river for a day of dragon boating, to foster teamwork, camaraderie, esprit de corps...whatever you call it.

The river water was particularly filthy, with floating debris consisting of leaves, plastic water bottles, the odd dead cockroach - you get the idea. Nonetheless, practice sessions degenerated into splashing episodes and anyone who went out came back soaked to bone, but no one complained. Admittedly, it was fun and i thoroughly enjoyed the company of my friends in the final months before I ORD. I shall disappear soon, especially after ATEC. With 9 weeks left, it's time to start moving on with life.

Soon, I will be singing Aretha Franklin's Freedom and I shall be a happy man, having gone through this rite of passage.

Dry was not an option

Sam and SSG Tok

Andy Woo and our MO

(Supposed hunks? Do I see abs?!)

My gay partner (told you so!)

On the way back I saw this:

XL, L, M and S

AHM

Yesterday, I took part in AHM, my first (and maybe last) half-marathon (42.2km for a full marathon is crazy) and at the moment, I hobble around like an old man, my trembling knees threatening to give way at any moment. I finished it in 2Hrs 10min which is neither a fantastic nor a humiliating time taken to complete 21km and managed to obtain the finisher's medal, which is given to those who ran under 2hr 45 min. It seems like half the world managed to achieve that so I don't consider it much of an achievement but admittedly, I'm quite satisfied with successfully maintaining a speed of 6 min per km.

The run was grueling but nonetheless quite an experience. There were a few people who inspired me to just keep running, just keep running, just keep running running running and now I know what it feels like to be cheered on. At around East Coast, there was this Caucasian man who kept clapping to encourage the runners and it as I passed him, there was this tingling feeling of excitement and adrenaline - I felt really cheered on. Along the way, 6 Div put up a series of inspirational messages on huge boards a la nike adverts and even included a recycled lion and clown head (I don't know what you call that), you know the ones you see during Chinese New Year as their mascots, which was quite amusing.

What impressed me was not the turnout - since every year seems to be record-breaking, but rather, the girls and the older folks, who managed to seem so at ease even after 20km. It's amazing! You go girls and old men! Haha.

Have uploaded some of the pics taken at the Singapore Fireworks Festival 2006. Team New Caledonia was admittedly the best, though France filled the entire sky with fireworks so I hope you enjoy my pics. Some camera shake spoilt a few unfortunately. Comments are welcome.

http://cards.webshots.com/invite/pickup/120330170gjsn/album/553083245tfSWNR

2 more months and ATEC Stage 2, after which I'll be starting to disappear from camp. ORD loh!

National Day

National Day is here again and as I sit here typing this entry, my entire family, less the maid, is snoozing away after late night movie marathon that last till 2 plus this morning. The weather is fine - strong breeze, dark clouds hovering over - the before it rains type, which is perfect for sleeping.

To some, National Day is the perfect opportunity to unleash the bottled-up patriotism in some of us (but I think such people are as rare as the dodo bird is to Singapore); To some, Nationdal Day is just another public holiday to party hard the night before and snooze to their hearts' content a la yours truly; To some, National Day is just another passing public holiday, a time mark (if I should put it that way) that the end is near and the 3 letters "O-R-D!" beckons; To some taking part in the parade, it's an opportunity of a lifetime to celebrate the nation's birthday, to others, it could be an arrow you can't deflect which lands you in the bloody marching contingent.

To our dear PM, like it or not, Singaporeans have a love-hate attitude towards this country and to the National Day Parade. Admittedly, I seem to side with the latter part on the "love-hate" scale. Still going through a system that is as screwed up as the idea of free speech (oh what a comparison! Must be learning from SI's Ja), National Day to me this year isn't about loving my country, it's about hating it - for putting me through NS. I shall seize the perfect opportunity to bemoan the army system which seems to reward those who slack and exploit those who don't. While some might say the army shapes a man's character, I would say it does so by revealing to him how screwed up the system is and that unfortunately, he has absolutely no power to change it.

To start, the army provides certain individuals with ready cash for say at least 5 years for those who willingly sign on. Though better than the iron-rice bowl concept as before, regulars now have to fight for their contract extension after their bond. Incentive to work? Not really because some are in it just for the money and with NSFs around, these regulars just throw everything to them whilst they go for coffee breaks and basically, wait for taxpayer's money to fall into their hands.

And for the last time, even though I am a male Singaporean citizen to which I'm obliged to serve NS and defend the nation, I am NOT a piece of property of the freakin' SAF! Recently, my CSM said, "Anything above your upper lip is yours to keep, anything below your lower lip is SAF property, so you better cut." (Please note this is not the exact quote due to numerous grammatical errors which would cause any lay man to shudder.) I have an obligation to serve the country yes. I am not a property of this country. Get this right.

With all this said however, I wonder whether singing a medley of "Sing Singapore" songs later will suddenly make me change my mind about it.

Anyway, went fireworks chasing the past few weeks - Singapore Fireworks Festival 2006. Lousy camera but still, some rather nice shots. Hopefully someone appreciates them. Blah.

Setting Godly Goals

My uncle (a rather well-to-do fellow) made an appointment with my sister and I for dinner on Saturday. I received the call on Tuesday at 2130hrs while I was on the bus, rumbling down the dirt path that led to Murai open patch, the start of a 3 day FTX. Despite the prospects of a sumptuous dinner at some high-end restaurant, it brought little comfort since the field camp hadn't even started and the mosquito feeding had not begun.

Outfield does horrors to the physical body and the mind. It's mental torture before, during and after - the dread of having to go for a field camp, the frustration during the wait and intense desire for the end and the nightmares thereafter. Outfield results in irreversible physical damage to the body - I'm suffering from a major breakout due to the camouflage cream and zero-hygiene, which means I can't even carry out basic cleansing; foot rot with small, tiny blisters and peeling skin; mosquito bites all over my body from the numerous feeding sessions in which I'm an unwilling victim...the list goes on. For the record, i have at least 50 bites on my hand, countless numbers on my back and a few on my face. Thankfully, none bit my eyelid or lip this time. Damn those mosquitoes which have the amazing ability to insert their probiscus through cloth. I just wonder why God created those pesky little things.

I digressed.

God surfaced to me the importance of setting Godly goals in the past 2 weeks - goals which ultimately will result in glorifying Him. The topic for Beta last week was about setting godly goals and during my after-beta conversation with Dave, questions about university and the future led to the question of what was my goal in life. At the moment, my aim to earn to as much money as possible, achieve a 6 digit monthly income and retire at the age of 40, to travel the world and stay in each place for at least 2 years so that I may enjoy its culture and to truly get to know the country. I have shared this dream of mine with many people and despite it sounding very pompous and naive, many people believe that I am up to it.

Is it a godly goal? The clear answer to me is no. Pastor Dave asked me where God figured in this goal of mine; my uncle told me that our goals should be aligned with God's plans. Also, this month was missions month and every week, I'm reminded about the hundreds of lost souls out there that need the gospel and that I cannot be so selfish.

It's hard to put your faith in heavenly treasures, things that you only hear of but don't see as opposed to the material things of this world. I don't deny that I've become more materialistic, desiring branded clothes, huge houses and so on. I guess it's really hard for me, or for anyone else at this stage of life to just say, I'll give up everything just for God.

Nonetheless, God has assured me over the past 2 weeks that if I honour Him, He will honour me and more abundantly. Ps Dave told me something which really rings a bell, he said, "Whatever God gives you belongs to Him... It is worth sacrificing everything on this world for Him, because of the eternal rewards you get in Heaven." Ps Dave is a living testimony of giving everything to God and he's absolutely sure of snowboarding in heaven. I concur.

Week of Firsts

The first half of my week was horrible as I once again plunged into depression upon returning to "prison". Even though I'm way into my second year as a soldier, the unit that I am in refuses to recognise that and hence I remain a downgraded CPL, treated worse than a recruit. It's ridiculous - all nights' off cancelled, only to be given at the whims and fancy of my asS4 (my OC) or my CSM; roll calls at 0715, 1330, 2100; daily SOC/IPPT training without rest - the list goes on, infinitely. With no avenues to air our grievances, the men in HQ can only resort to complaining amongst each other and think up of sadistic ways to torture our superiors, such as slowly slicing the flesh of the men we hate, inserting 5 IVs at one go such that fluid pressure builds up and he implodes, inserting needles inbetween the flesh and fingernails before pulling it out and adding alcohol swabs, I'll stop here just in case all these sadistic thoughts amount to the actual act of murder.

Anyway, it was a week of firsts for me - I did a lot of things for the first time in my life, such as removing stitches, trying durian, visiting West Coast for a 10km run.

It's been quite an amazing week and God has showed me quite a lot of things this week, including the truth that He will honour you if you choose to honour Him. I was feeling extremely depressed about my circumstances, hating my OC, hating army, getting bogged down by a ton of work and I had enough of being hounded to pass my SOC and threatened with weekend RT. It's sick I tell you - my OC has no sense of what welfare means and for that matter, no sense of how to use the English language. For the record, in an email, he spelt durian as "durain" and wrote everything in singular form. I may intend to post one of his absurd (and senseless) emails one day, but not at the moment. I was seeking the Lord for comfort and how I should view my current situations and He gave me 2 verses, the first, "Slaves obey your masters..." and second, "For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows."

I was encouraged by the fact that though I was suffering, I could seek comfort in the Lord, comfort which is more abundant than the amount of suffering I am going through. Simple but very meaningful.

I also made the following choice of obeying my "master". Initially, I was talking to a lot of people and we were all intending not to pass our IPPT or SOC. This was so that the battalion would not be able to achieve good results in BUC and henceforth stifle the the chances of promotion of our superiors, since they were treating us in such a horrible manner. But I made the choice to do so and I prayed saying that I choose to obey and pass my SOC so as to honour God. With respect to that, I prayed to be able to pass my SOC the following day, and to do so, by giving my best.

The odds were against me: I was in the first detail with a lot of people, meaning that I would have to jostle and wait for my turn to clear the obstacles; I was feeling terribly weak as adrenaline had sapped every single ounce of energy that I possessed; it was the morning and dew would make the obstacles very slippery, the swing trainer my stumbling block. A

I was languishing at the back of the pack at the initial stage and so I had to wait for my turn at the swing trainer. I saw my friend, who never failed the obstacle before, slip and fall off and I thought I was bound to fail. While he was still cursing and swearing, I made my attempt and amazingly managed to complete it, the rest slipping and in the end, giving up on the obstacle.

The last obstacle, the low ramp was meant to be crossed by the 6min mark but I did so at 6.45min. Upon hearing my pacer shout my timing, I was so tempted to give up because it meant that I would ultimately fail. Yet I ran, and I ran and I ran and at the final stretch, the timer at the end point shouted something which I couldn't make out, which I deduced as run faster. As I crossed the finishing line, expecting the worst, I asked about my timing. The timer, Kiat Yi, gave me a rather uncertain look, paused and said, "9.29.64" He wasn't sure if they considered it a pass but IT WAS! Friends of mine, some of the signallers especially, say it is a golden timing and no one could be as lucky as me. I say, it was the hand of God.

I hope this is a testimony encourages anyone to choose to honour the Lord. Despite being extremely tired after my 10km run yesterday (55+min ;) ) I decided to go for Beta and ended up having a great talk with Dave, clearing my doubts about a lot of things and being really encouraged. So to those out there, choose to honour the Lord and He will honour you.

Retail Therapy

4th of July marks USA's independence day; the very same date this year marks my 1 year anniversary in the miserable abode known as Keat Hong camp. On the brighter side, it means I've been friends with some of my bunks mates for 1 year and they have been the people that are constantly around me 24/7. Those that I've known for exactly 1 year and are still around are... Renhe, whom I share the same birth date with. Okay, there's only one person left because the rest have ORDed and I've known Gilbert, my SMM buddy when we were, well, in SMM. Duh.

With approximately 4 months left to freedom, time seems to slow to a crawl and work is piling up. We had our ISO pre-audit on Thursday with the actual one this Thursday so it's very stressful since I'm in-charge of it. Sometimes, I wonder why I bother to do so much for a miserable $500 when others are slacking. This is exacerbated by the fact that the medics in my unit, besides being underpaid, are under-appreciated and exploited. Why oh why do I have such a good work ethic?

Zara sale started on Thursday - I spotted the advertisement in the Straits Times, a gorgeous word "SALE" embellished on a black rectangle. My heart skipped a beat for a moment and I had the sudden urge to barge out of camp. Fortunately, the thought of shopping in my No. 4 and getting charged for going AWOL, being sent to Detention Barracks and getting my ORD date extended stopped me in my tracks - it was not a John Little sale (A sale not worth waiting for), rather a sale worth waiting to go for.

I woke up early on Saturday with the intention of getting to the store as early as possible so as not to miss out on any good deals. I was delayed however, because I couldn't find any shopping kakis. Just before lunch though, an sms arrived and JL became my shopping partner.

One thing I learnt from the 7 hour shopping trip - from 2.30 to around 9.30 is that retail therapy does not need to result in busting your credit card limit. In my case, it is more of burning a whole in my pocket because I don't own a credit card. Instead, you can derive happiness from watching your shopping kaki spend spend spend! Oh well... JL is going to start work this Monday so we had to get him a nice jacket to wear in the office, plus a nice shirt. It looked gorgeous when he put it on - I chose it, heehee - it was a great combination. Brown jacket with a striped shirt with a tinge of pink plus the black polo he was wearing, it looked absolutely fantastic. Anyway, he was contemplating whether the jacket, going at $100 was too expensive. To cut the long story short, I convinced him to buy it. I was so happy for me. Haha

JL brought me to this small shop at Lucky Plaza which served abalone, sharks fin at just $5.00. Okay, the abalone slices, the sharks fin was microscopic but the taste was good. Besides, shark's fin in itself it tasteless so why bother? It's the taste of the soup that counts. Oh, it's home made beancurd is wonderful too. Will go back someday and who in the hell would know that such a place existed in Orchard?

23 June

There's been a dearth of posts lately, partially due to a lack of time, with laziness accounting for the other part. Sometimes I wonder whether anyone reads; whether anyone cares since my tag board seems to stagnate so much so that it seems to be the breeding ground for a whole hosts of virtual mosquitoes. However, I don't blame anyone for falling asleep reading the absurd ranting of a 19+ year old NSF about army life - who would ever be interested?

Life has been rather hectic. Apart from suffering under the oppression of commanders who use their rank to achieve their selfish aims, life is a whirlwind ride of ISO preparations and more recently, drawing blood for hundreds of people for their mandatory HIV test after the India exercise.

I do admit drawing blood adds some spice to life. It's an experience to get your blood drawn, it's an altogether different one when you're the one doing it. From those who take it like a man to those who whine like boys, I've seen myriad reactions to the simple act of drawing blood. I profess to be rather accurate - it's impossible to have a perfect record and have, at times drawn flak on certain occassions. For the record, all medics try their best to inflict the least pain possible, meaning that we try not to miss. There are certain occassions though that may result in an unsuccessful attempt, not of our own misendeavours, but due to the physical reactions of the patient.

I was particularly upset when someone criticised us for not being able to carry out this simple task. I was the person drawing the blood of this person after my colleague missed. I was successful at hitting a vein. However, because this person has a natural phobia of needles, fear resulted in the constriction of his veins and so, a paltry 1ml of blood was withdrawn. It's not within our control that such things happen so to put the blame on us is absolutely absurd. Dear faithful readers, if you happen to be in such situations in the future, please do not put the blame squarely on the person who draws your blood. If you ever doubted his/her skills, by all means, take the syringe and DIY. We'll see who faints first.

Last week, bought my first Guess T-shirt. Today, bought my first pair of pumas. What's next?

GSS kinda sucks. On duty tomorrow with a ton of stuff to prepare for our pre-audit. Why oh why do I work so hard for 500 miserable dollars?

Goodbye Joan...Till we meet again.

Joan passed away on Wednesday night at 9.30pm. Though she's gone, I'll always remember her bubbly ways, the time we spent together in the same class during the first 3 months of JC. I thought she was an ah-lian at first, her hair with a slightly brown tinge. She was my angel when we played the angel mortal game and I still keep the angel-shaped note she sent to me. She and my mortal, Sharon, bought me a brand new 37 degrees pencil box when they realised that my old metal bobdog one had been with me through my secondary school years. I'm still carrying it today.

Unfortunately, her life was cut short. Nonetheless, it was a life well-lived, a purposeful one and she'll always be remembered as a fighter - as she wanted people to remember her. She brought inspiration and hope in the midst of suffering and pain. Now, there's no more suffering for her, no more pain, tears and sorrow. Though we grieve over her death, we should be comforted that she's in heaven, sitting with God, talking about her life experience and enjoying the love, the happiness, the satisfaction and hearing the words, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

Joan, your legacy lives on. A short 20 years, but extremely well lived. Congratulations.

Goodbye Joan. Till we meet again.

The song below was written for Joan, taken from the blog set up for her.

Joan's Song

joan pls dont go
there are many things that i would like to know
thats getting hard for you to show
the way day by day
we've travelled miles and miles through deep turnstiles
so many softball slides and daffodils
and played

though it hurts
though you smile
looking back right now
i dont really care
just want you to know
that ive been thinking about you almost everyday
until i find the words to say
but now
just want you to know
that ive been thinking about you nearly everyday
until i find the words to say
i know youre hurting now
but we'll make it through somehow
wont we joan

joan say you'll stay
there are many things that i would like to say
that i forgot to mention yesterday
the way day by day
we've travelled miles and miles through deep turnstiles
so many softball slides and daffodils
and played

now it hurts
though you smile
looking back right now
i dont really care just want you to know
that ive been thinking of you nearly everyday
until i find the words to say
now just want you to know
that ive been thinking about you nearly everyday
until i find the words to say
i know youre hurting now
but we'll make it through somehow

wont we joan
wont we joan
just soldier on (x3)
wont we joan-oh-oh-ohh
wont we joan

pissed

It's been a really crappy and long week for me, despite staying out of camp on Monday and Tuesday. I'm extremely fed-up with my commanders, the CO, S4, CSM and even my immediate superiors. I've had enough of being accused of slacking and working my ass off for this bloody unit that doesn't appreciate the work that its men put in. As our highly educated SAFOS scholar CO puts it, "It's okay if we don't get the best results if you do your best. But if you don't get the best results, it's because you haven't done your best."

Recently, he said," There are 3 types of people - the coward, who knows of his mistake but chooses to run away from it; the loser who knows his mistake but chooses not to do anything about it; the hero - who knows his mistake and chooses to do something about it." Unfortunately, in the case of the army, it's best to be a coward, less more arrows come shooting your way. I've learnt over the past year or so that if you slack, you'll get a slack life; working hard brings more work and it isn't worth it. In addition, I'd like to point out that the first two letters of the word coward are CO.

Frankly, I'm not against working hard. I strive to do my best in whatever I'm tasked to do but one thing that irks me is when MY work is underappreciated. In addition, it really gets on my nerves when people keep suggesting that medics, especially those in our camp, are slack. I am so tempted to give these people one tight slap. This is an absolute slap in the face for us medics who work hard to give these ingrates medical service. Just a few weeks back, we were walking to the cookhouse to have our dinner when we unfortunately crossed paths with our CSM. We greeted him and his reply was, "Eh, medics very free right?" !@#$#^$ What is the problem with these people? In addition, with a complete disregard for soldier welfare, our S4 and CSM cancelled our nights' off despite full knowledge of the fact that rations weren't indented. We were left hungry and made to buy food out of or own pockets. Nights' off are officially cancelled unless approval is given.

I'm ashamed of myself for sprouting out a river of vulgarities this week but I am absolutely fed-up with the way we are treated. Despite putting effort in the things we do, we are underappreciated and deprived of our basic priviledges. If you'd like to think we are slack, why not compare it with those people in other units? If you want us to do work, fine by all means, but please, respect us and we'll return the favour.

We all play a part in defending the nation. Whether a regular or NSF, we make up the army. So let's treat each other equally and maybe, we could get something positive out of it.

To hell with the #$%@#%$ regulars - not all, just some.

Parents Out

My parents are away. They've gone to Malaysia to attend a relative's wedding.

So I've got the house all to myself!

I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!

right.

I'm stuck with 2 parasites and $50 to take care of their meals over the next 2 days.
One parasite is well, a parasite who eats too much.
The other is a parasite of the same species, who just got 19/90 for his Chinese mid-years.

I'm an evil, evil brother.

My parents say that this will be a sort of honeymoon for them.
That term seems to have a dubious, contrived sweetness to it.

The honeymoon of the initial years of marriage mean:
"Honey, I'm so in love with you, I'm way over the moon."

The honeymoon of years into marriage mean:
"Honey, I'll fly you to the moon, for free. I'll pay anyone to do it."

Ah, sweet honeymoon.

Honeymoon.

AFter 1 week

From a mangled mess of red blood cells and fibrinogen, to the healing process of mitosis and the proliferation of new genetically similar tissue cells, also known as somatic cells, we are almost at a full circle in the renewal and repair process of the physical body. My wounds sustained at Ubin last week have at least dried up and protective layers have formed over the once raw and stinging scrapes. No longer are the two major ones sustained, one on my left knee and the other on the lower left of my abdomen, swimming in the yolk of puss and plasma. They are slowly, but steadily being returned to their original state - ah, the wonders of the human body!

These wounds have left me out of action for one week and my fitness is dropping at an exponential rate. The busy week before had left me with little time to indulge in cardiovascular activity and the inability to this week has left me physically weak and perhaps, fat. Horror of horrors! Therefore, I will be working doubly hard to get back on track in aiming for the coveted prize of: six pacs and the 21km marathon scheduled for August.

Everyone now knows that I had quite a spectacular fall in Ubin and limping into bunk on Tuesday wasn't a very pleasant experience, both physically and mentally. Recounting my ordeal sent Gilbert into hysterical laughter and chiding that I overestimated myself, "as usual". He's grin grew wider when he saw how I undress (yes! in front of him ;) ) and changed out. To him, Winston was a comedy act being played out, physical comedy for that matter, and he revelled in making me look even more stupid in front of the others. Oh well...that's what friends are for...

Though a supposed "short" week, it's been meeting after meeting and more meetings to come in preparation for ISO certification. Workshops, discussions about the new manual are the new fillers that help the mundane hours as an NSF pass by. The months ahead are going to be really packed. REALLY.

ubin

I'm a little too lazy to add in my own comments and I haven't got the photos from Liz yet so I shall rip everything off Kenneth's and Liz's blog. Haha.

We're from the S.I.A (Singapura Intelligence Agency).
Handpicked and selected from the best of the best, the durian creme de la creme.
Our first mission: To spy out new islands to build more HDB blocks for our resource starved island.


With the assistance of the coast guard, we set off on our journey.
We promised not to divulge anything, not any word of what we spoke, saw or heard.




Our identities are secret. We blended in with the civilian population, acted like them and were subjected to the checks of immigration law.


We were equipped with jungle survival skills,

Primitive skills to help us escape

IF and IF ONLY, caught by the native islanders.


Our sole reliance: on GOD.



We spied out the new land.

and saw it was good.

Our mission accomplished.


Our reward: Exotic delicacies


and a one-night stay at the mud-plains.


What lies ahead we still don't know...what lies beyond us?



Next mission: Case File Still Open

Monday

It's MONDAY and I'm not one of those pathetic/miserable/zonked-out Singaporean suffering the blues. I can sit in front of my computer and type in an entry! Yoo hoo! Okay, I do admit that this is one of the rare events, with just a slightly higher possibility than the Big Bang, that occur. Otherwise, I'll be returned to my original state (as mentioned above), accompanied by my No. 4, boots, beret, red cross and the smell of antiseptic solution. Oh I feel like Cinderella at the ball, minus the charming prince at the moment. My time is up when I step past the gates of hell (the guardroom) and *poof, chariot to pumpkin, chauffeurs to door mice, civilian to *scary music please MILITARY PERSONNEL. Oh the horror of horrors! Meanwhile, let me relish in the satisfaction of taking the day off.

Sunday was Mother's Day: A commercialised, over-hyped and actually, just any ordinary day. mothers all over the world congratulate each other on a job well done, reminisce the days of their pregnancy etc. Mushy Fluffy stuff. Hugs and kisses. Yuck. Now now now, don't point the finger at me and say I'm an ingrate. I use to LOVE celebrating these events when I was young but I guess that when you grow older, things change.

Admittedly, I'm not one who openly expresses my feelings in my actions. I dislike hugs and kisses, open displays of affection because I'm uncomfortable with it. Perhaps it's because I was brought up in such an environment, perhaps it was because mom was working overseas during parts of my growing up years, perhaps it's just a gradual drift in the r'ship over the years so much so that there's nothing much left now. And so, there's much less a desire to do anything for that person.

Yet the reason why I hate such days is because people tend to have expectations and they end up getting really disappointed. My mom was complaining about how we weren't doing anything but I don't see the point of being superficial and celebrating for the sake of it. Worst still, I don't like people to judge me based on the things I do on some "special" day and accuse me of not being appreciative or showing any love. Over the years, such special days, especially my birthdays in my case, have lost it's meaning. These are the days where we are deluded into thinking that we're the most important people. We set expectations of the things that people should do for us and yet at the end of the day, when they are not met, you end up feeling miserable. What for?

Everyone loves to feel special but it's time to maybe overlook such special occasions. Random days become special when we learn to pick up the small actions of love from the people around us or to be thankful for every little thing, big or small. Perhaps it's my self-developed self-defence mechanism after years of disappointment during my birthdays but at the very least, it's taught me how not to overlook the smaller things in life.

I don't like talking to people I don't love. So if I do, remember: it means something to me.

Pulau Ubin

I'm in great pain now. I scrapped my hands, elbows, knees and a small part of my abdomen when I was flung of my bicycle. I was going down a steep slope when I saw people, so I tried to brake and swerve. I skid on gravel and sand and my fragile skin had to bear the brunt of it all. I hate friction and gravity. My wounds are getting inflamed, they'll leave scars, help! Okay, I shall stop being whine/wuss-ston. Anyway, it was terribly embarassing and worst of all, it resulted in two holes in my precious (and new) 1986 nike dunk t-shirt that resemble cockroach bites.

It all happened (music starts playing)...

Yesterday was Vesak Day so I jumped at the opportunity of going to Pulua Ubin with Kenneth, Liz, Grace and Kelvin. Haven't exactly spent a lot of time with church mates so it's one of those rare opportunities for me to join in. We went there for cycling and to check out Chek Jawa and God provided us with great weather. On the way to Ubin, our bumboat got stopped by the coast guard. Our IDs were checked by the police and we were all very excited about that. We started going crazy about snapping pictures with the police boat and moved on to taking a series of pictures, starring US as fugitives, much to the amusement of other passengers. It was spastic but seriously hilarious.

Not an experienced cyclist (it was my fourth adventure since I learnt how to cycle), I had quite a hard time manoeuvering along the dirt trails, crashing into the plants along the side and getting into a few near accidents. Terribly embarassing. We stopped by a gate facing the sea along the way, before heading to the quarry. The quarry had great scenery, a small lake nestled among man-made cliffs. We found some kind of trail, went "jungle bashing" that led into an open area of rocks. Scenery there was wonderful and so, we snapped more pics. -_-".

Chek Jawa was like my 6 pacs - submerged as it was high tide. It was cool to be able to see the mangrove trees which reminded me of mugging secondary school geography's Climate and Vegetation. I actually had the urge to just spew out some of the stuff I'd learnt. Bleahx. We saw a lot of mudskippers, which became Kelvin's next target to catch since all the crabs were nowhere in sight; stepped on the blanket of washed-up seeweed which felt like a squishy carpet; took in the sights and sounds of air (changi airport was nearby), land (our bicycles parked at a corner) and sea (a small private ship against the backdrop of a big container ship moving past) transport and smells of the salty and somewhat foul air of mud, salt and decomposing matter. We sat on some huge rocks nearby and it was something that I hadn't done in a long time.

We headed back when it became Cat 1 and it was during the return trip that I fell.

Photos to come soon, when Liz sends them over. ;)

Post Election

The election results came out last week, and once again Singapore's parliament was back to the status quo, with 2 seats going to the opposition party. Since the results were announced, Singapore is once again back to its sedate, stoid and routine state. The previous week was marked by candidates doing house-to-house visits and walk-abouts; this week flew past with only an inkling of activity - meet-the-people sessions have resumed and newly elected (or should we say RE-elected) MPs are trying to "clear" the backlog of requests/complaints/comments/whatever received in the past 2 weeks leading to the election. Who best to interview but our dear Transport Minister, George Yeo, who barely clung on to his seat in Aljunied GRC to show that indeed, elected MPs do care about the residents of their ward. Now, do I sense a tinge of desperation?

Despite the PAP government screaming that they have been given a "strong mandate" to govern Singapore in the next 5 years, I'm sure most would disagree to some extent. There was no doubt that the PAP would win, the main question was, "by how much?" Even though the PAP did improve upon it's 1997 election results, a thorough examination of individual GRCs may disprove the PAP's claim. Newspapers have given a detailed analysis so I shan't blabber on further. However, I do like to emphasise that Ang Mo Kio GRC, where PM Lee contested in, garnered only 67% of the vote as compared to SM Goh, who garnered 75% of the vote in his first election. If the votes cast were votes of approval of the current PM, I wonder how strong a mandate was given to our PM?

Anyway, the election is over so to hell with the results.

This week's ST forum was full of comments about the GE. Often filled with ridiculous complaints, it was heartening to see people talking about the need for upgrading in opposition wards. It at least reflects the desire of Singaporeans to "stay together, move ahead". It's nice to know that Singaporeans aren't a selfish bunch who care only about upgrading in their own estate, that they do recognise that other wards have their own needs and they are mature enough to reflect the issue to the ruling party. This is what I would call a transition to First World politics.

The 2006 election may be over but the fight for 2010/11 is far from over. The next election will pit the PAP against an even better, more credible opposition - a stronger, more experienced WP which has just emerged from this election and also face an ever-demanding, vocal and perhaps more cynical post-65 generation, including people like me *winkz. I believe new voters will want to see candidates working the ground in the next 5 years, not in the 2 weeks leading to the election.

For the opposition, it would be a good opportunity to establish itself. It should be proactive in responding to the issues, not just in parliament but also to the people. They should find solutions, not just oppose; mingle in coffeeshops and hold regular talks for residents to get feedback. More importantly, as representatives in parliament, ensure that whatever said is voiced out. They have a fresh slate of candidates, it's time to turn them into a slate of seasoned politicians with mentors like Chiam and Low TK who have proven themselves.

As for the PAP, it should stop assuming that they will be always be the ruling party. Singaporeans cannot deny that they have done a good job. However, the new PAP may not necessarily be able to match up with the old guards. By sheltering the new candidates in supersized GRCs, I wonder how much they now about what's happening on the ground. This elite group may never find out what the lower-income groups think if they're constantly in their nice air-conditioned bungalows enjoying their 5 digit incomes. Worst, being unable to speak Mandarin.

The election may be over, but the fight has just begun.

Election results

So far, WP's Low Thia Kiang has won the Hougang ward with 6 of the votes, an improvement from the 55%. That's a trashing and for the record, and we heard screams and celebrating going on around the estate, ours included.

With the exception of Bukit Panjang, the opposition has garnered a bigger share of the votes as compared to the previous GE. At the moment, we're back to the share of the votes that characterised the 97 GE . However, given the impending implosion of the SDA, it's a wonder why some still vote for their candidates. Is it a sign?

May 6 Polling Day

It's been a tough, long week despite the Labour Day holiday on Monday. We had our Influenza Pandemic Exercise, IPRE which went on throughout the week and simultaneously, a mobilisation exercise on Tuesday, spanning 48 hours.

The IPRE is an exercise to test the Medical Centre's readiness in the event that the dreaded H5N1 virus mutates into a form which confers it the ability to transmit from human to human. As the saying goes, "Imitation is the best form of flattery," this H5N1 virus seems to be following in the footsteps of its other cousin, the coronavirus which causes SARS. The coronavirus, which probably still exists albeit in a less virulent form, has learnt to co-exist with humans supposedly whilst the H5N1 is still on its evolutionary path to causing a full-blown pandemic. The beauty of viruses! The RNA, the base plates, the parasitic relationship - viruses need US to survive, that's why it shouldn't kill us all.

I digressed again. Anyway, we all had to put on the N95 masks which makes breathing really difficult, not forgetting the lesions that the tight rubber hands could leave on your face. Inspectors came down to "audit" us, a term which the army loves to use AND carry out. I was part of the 4-men emergency drill team so I had to down a PPE, Personal Protective Equipment (I'm suddenly not too sure the exact terms) which includes a surgical cap, gloves, a blue gown and a mask. It was quite awkward walking around the medical centre in that but nonetheless, it made me look as if I was an assistant in a surgical theatre. Not everyone gets to wear one too *winkz.

The other major event was the mobilisation exercise. In 48 hours, we had to be prepared to go to battle and preparations for such things are crazy. We had to bring in ammunition, which required 17 5-tonners, bring in the rations, body-armour etc. Got the chance to put on the body armour, which weighs a hefty 12kg. It is literally putting on two metal plates on you and it only provides protection from richochet bullets (bullets that hit you at an angle), not direct shots. I became overweight after putting everything on - body armour, SBO, rifle, helmet - an additional 22kg of weight (we used the weighing scale). Add in the full-pack and I don't think I'll be able to walk.

Despite the hectic schedule, we still found time to chase the happenings of the 2006 GE. The medical centre is split between the opposition and the PAP. Supporters of the former consist of those who are unable to vote yet and the latter, you guessed it, those working for the current government, including all the PSC scholars.

Although I'm too young to vote, I'm hoping the opposition wins over Aljunied GRC and Hougang. Potong Pasir's going to be a tough fight for incumbent Chiam See Tong. In a debate between a colleague (a PSC scholar), he chided me for "supporting the opposition for the sake of supporting it" and rebutted that it was important to "blow up" the Gomez issue because it concerned the integrity of the candidates we were voting for. All I can say is that whatever the PAP has accused Gomez of, is all a case of "what ifs", it hasn't taken place, it could have been his intention etc. Whatever. He has apologised, let's move on.

In reaching out to the post-65 voters, the PAP have argued that too much opposition is detrimental to the country. It would stall decision making, lower investors confidence level and bring in, as MM Lee says "Third-World" politics into parliament. I beg to differ.

Firstly, even if a 5 member opposition GRC is voted in, it will not stall decision-making. The ruling party still has a majority and as long as the party whip is not lifted, will be able to push through with the necessary bills and legislation. In fact, it will help in the process in decision-making. The opposition will be there to oppose, yes but instead of looking it as opposing for the sake of it, why not look at it as bringing an alternate perspective? Sometimes, we are unable to see possible loopholes or problems from our POV. The opposition would play the role of a "reviewer" and provide the necessary "checks and balance" in the government. I completely disagree with Lee Hsien Loong's point that the presence of an opposition party will prevent him from focussing on the important issues. I find that his claim that he will spend sleepless nights trying to think of arguments to rebutt the opposition reflects pure arrogance and quite simply, laziness.

I may not take such a stand if Chee Soon Juan was to be voted in. The opposition this time has slated a credible and decent team, especially in Aljunied. They're no longer as reckless and as useless as before. Yes, the PAP has fielded lawyers and doctors - so has WP. In fact, one of the weaker points of PAP candidates is that the WP has a better mix of candidates. One may view the PAP as consisting of mostly the upper middle class and above, which may exclude the views of the average Singaporean. This becomes more obvious when PAP candidates attempt to reach out to even the Chinese speaking audience. Based on the election speeches and rallies, I'm particularly amused at how some candidates stumble when they speak in Mandarin.

The papers report that this GE is threatening to become a "non-event", due to a lack of a central theme. There have been a few issues that the WP could have capitalised on, especially the more prominent one regarding lift upgrading. Frankly, I'm terribly disappointed that the PAP constantly uses upgrading as an election carrot. The issue that this creates an unlevel playing field is over-hyped but it also brings in other issues. Firstly, we all pay taxes and so everyone should be entitled to the funds for upgrading. Secondly, and more importantly, shouldn't upgrading be extended to those who need it, particularly, lift upgrading for the elderly?

The highly contested Potong Pasir is a perfect example. The PAP themselves are saying that Potong Pasir has an "aging population" and so should vote for them in order to get their lifts upgraded. I would like to ask, so what if you lose the ward? If one of the PAP's goal is to improve the lives of Singaporeans, shouldn't they consider providing lift upgrading to those who need it more? Isn't it a slap in the wrist if the PAP preaches that and yet only provides upgrading if they are voted in? The opposition could question these values and at the same time, offer up concrete evidence to prove that they can do it at a lower cost to discredit the PAPs claim.

The other issue that the opposition brought up could also be a focal point: The pay of ministers. The PAP boasts of a government that is not corrupt. They argue that a high renumeration is required to prevent corruption, to reduce the incentive to collect bribes. Once again, the have contradicted themselves. The PAP questioned the integrity of the WP's Gomez in the election saga. When questioned on whether they have "made a mountain out of a molehill", they justify it by saying that it is a matter of integrity. Now, by stating that a high renumeration is needed to prevent corruption, is the PAP then implying that integrity can be bought? In addition, isn't the PAP implying that the reason why PAP candidates are non-corrupt is because they're "bought over"? Doesn't that bring up serious implications about the integrity and the quality of our leaders?

In the long-term, the PAP will be the ruling party of Singapore. However, as the next generation emerges, how will the PAP fare against the opposition? In my opinion, I'm hoping the WP wins over Aljunied this time. Given current economic prospects, it would be good for Singapore to get a taste of a bit more opposition in the government. It would be a gamble, but one with less risk. Given the quality of the candidates of the opposition, it's time that Singaporeans give them a chance. We all seek to become a First-World nation, let's have First-World politics, with alternative voices. What I would like to see is PAP and the opposition working together to keep Singapore growing - it's not a contest of who can do a better job. Rather, it's a cooperative that should go beyond party lines, with the lofty ambition of doing things for the good of Singapore.

For me, staying in the hotly contested Hougang ward, my vote will go to WP's Low.

Let's see that hammer smash the chiku into pieces.

Able to blog again.

I'm back after a 2 week hiatus; I think hiatus is the wrong term since I wanted to blog but was unable to. Internet explorer went amok and everytime I tried entering a site which required logging on, it would crash. Fortunately, I managed to circumvent the problem and tada, I'm back.

I just had a sumptuous meal at a restaurant opened by Narnia's Singaporean cousin - the name being Kia Hia. (I know, I know, this is completely random. It's Winstonian fashion.) Anyway, we were there to celebrate Mother's Day in advance together with my mom's extended family. I got to see my cousin, who just entered NS, in his full glory - I'm referring only to his newly shaven head. Ah, the glorious rite of passage that every male Singaporean citizen has to go through. I was oh SO tempted to scream "6 months more" at him but on the account that he was almost suffering from a full blown URTI - sore throat, cough, flu and all, (plus, we were all in a nice restaurant which would make me a crazy mad woman if I shouted) I refrained.

It was a great lunch consisting of: fried fish with wasabe, drunken prawns, special homemade beancurd with abalone mushroom, claypot herbal chicken, vegetables, black pepper beef, yangzhou fried rice, sweet and sour pork, pork floss soft-shell crab and honeydew sago. From the adults table (we were split into 2 tables since we're a big family), ee-fu noodles and oatmeal soft shell crab. Nice.

We went to SAFRA Mt Faber for bowling after that. As we were leaving and going down the stairs, Gloria's heel's were making very loud "cluck cluck" noises. She started giggling uncontrollably, probably because she got a kick out of it, and went high after that. Do women really like such sounds? Hmmm...
______

Sickness and death seem to be playing out in my life as if it's a sick joke. The 10 year old son of one of the missionaries in my church died in a freak accident - he was choked to death when his saxophone strap hook got caught in the keyhole of a door. An ex-classmate of mine, whom everyone now knows, Joan, is in the final stages of cancer and may not live to see tomorrow. It's really sad to see someone you know suffer from diseases such as cancer which practically ravages the entire body. Joan suffers from tongue cancer which has spread to her neck. I was looking through some of the pictures in her blog and I just wanted to cry. A 20 year-old shouldn't be put through such misery.

She was my angel in the "angel-mortal" game played during the first 3 months of JC. My first impression of her was that of an "ah-lian", but she's a great person, great personality. Her bubbly persona hasn't left her, judging from the pictures but the entries in her blog reflect the emotional struggles that she goes through. Sometimes we ask, God, why do such things happen? and we don't understand. Yet God has a purpose for everyone and through her struggles, it's comforting to know that she's put all her trust in God and truely, she is bringing a message of hope to a lot of people, strangers included.

Suffering is hard, but it brings out the best and the brightest in every individual. Joan, fight on!

Outreach event

All praise to God, the outreach event went smoothly and there were so many new comers! I shall talk more about that later.

I took a walk home after meeting up with Chee Keen for supper. Along the way, I was praying to God to teach me to be satisfied with whatever I have and not to keep comparing myself with others. What made me do so? Well, Chee Keen is currently in OCS and so he gets a higher allowance than me. In addition, a few setbacks in the past year have made me unhappy about the amount of money that I get each month. I was originally scheduled to go for SPEC II course in March but missed the boat as my MO wasn't notified about the impending course. It was my last chance for promotion to 3rd Sgt and to enjoy at least 6 months of SPEC pay but it just wasn't meant to me. I was tormented by this last year as all my other good friends have been promoted (I was ranting about it in previous posts if you recall) and basically, after 4 months, I thought I had gotten over it.

Well, a few minutes ago, God showed me that I hadn't. I was conversing with a friend on MSN and found out that he had already been promoted to the rank of CPL (an additional $50 per month) since December, together with the same batch of medics. Therefore, I have been shortchanged at least $200. Frankly, I'm really pissed and I don't deny that I'm raging mad. I feel that I deserve every cent of the hard work I've put it as compared to others, in addition to the fact that I'm in an active unit. I'm toeing the line of letting my mouth sprout of unpleasant words. The only reason holding me back is that it doesn't reflect well on a person who does so. WINSTON, THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS. GOD HELP ME.

I'm thankful for whatever God has given us for the outreach. The programme went smoothly, except for some minor transition flaws here and there; at times, it was rather chaotic (that's because we had SO MANY people) but more importantly, people heard the gospel. Personally, I was expecting something to happen, I felt God's presence but at times, I did have my doubts about the programme and how people would respond. I think we did whatever we could, God had to do the rest and that came to 1 salvation and 17 wanting to know more about Jesus. PTL. Okay, I expected more but still, 1 is enough to cause a racket among the angels in heaven. Imagine the celebrations that would take place because of one saved soul! If it had been 10 or even more, it would as chaotic as the riots in France, but in a positive sense.

Met a lot of people udring the event. Talked to a lot of new friends including Alvin from RI gym (he knows my cousin) and a few others. Going back to camp soon.

Adios.

Easter

This was meant to be for Friday but since I was too tired to type anything, it got delayed.

Anyway, preparations for the Easter outreach had been running on a hectic schedule. 3 weeks to sort anything out isn't really a lot of time but that's what we were given for the drama, the skits etc. It's been crazy and I've been burning weekends in a manner similar to that of burning rubbish in an incinerator. A precious weekend just goes "wosh" and it's all gone.

Sometimes, it's easy to complain and at times, it was hard to drag myself down to church - it seemed like a waste of time when I only had a small role to play. Nonetheless, keeping in mind that ultimately it's all for the glory of God, giving up time for God is worth it. It is indeed a better way to spend my weekends as opposed to bumming around the house.

Cartel

I'm shocked, appalled and horrified that Cafe Cartel has implemented a 10% service charge. I only found out today when I met up with some of my JC mates at the PS branch. It's a much preferred venue, in fact, a cherished one where we had spent many outings together. It holds many memories for us mainly due to it's good food and most importantly it was service charge free haven for many of us price-sensitive students.

Something was amiss when the waiter actually opened up the menu and placed it in front of us as we were seated. Then came the shock and horror, stickers on every page exclaiming the 10% service charge. Everything on the menu suddenly appeared to be very expensive and in the end, all of us settled for the cheapest stuff. It also made me think twice about ordering the set lunch (an addition of 3.90 exlcuding service charge).

The overall experience was marred by the bad service, all the more unjustified by the addition of the service charge. We had a hard time trying to get the attention of the waiters and we weren't even served plained water! Cafe Cartel has a free flow of bread for all customers, unfortunately, this was still self service, with the exception that the bread was pre-cut.

Let's try to make sense of Cartel's move from an economic perspective.

One of the most obvious effect of the charge was a decline in the number of customers. Where before, one was accustomed to queuing and waiting a period of time before being seated, we were able to get a table almost immediately. I also observed an increase in the number of empty tables, something that I have never seen in my previous visits. Previous visits saw a full house, even during the non-peak hours of after 2.00pm.

Technically speaking, it is inevitable that the number of customers will fall, unless the Price elasticity of demand, PED, is infinite (ie. the same number of customers keep coming even if a piece of chicken is priced at $1000000). Unfortunately, without any statistics, it is impossible to determine if it is a wise move. If PED was elastic, ie. more than 1, an increase in the price would result in a more than proportionate decrease in the quantity of food sold, ie. revenue would decrease.

We must note though that PED for each individual differs. Each person's sensitivity to price would depend on other factors such as affordability, the propensity to consume and so on. So, in order to determine this, we have to look at the customer base of the restaurant.

If a large part of their customers are working adults, perhaps they wouldn't mind since 15% to them is nothing (I'm assuming so). If a large part of their customers were made up of students, the impact would be greater ie a larger PED.

Anyway, there are too many factors and too little stats to help support this argument so at the moment, it's useless to try to pinpoint whether the strategy adopted is the right step forward. However, I abhor having to pay service tax just because the waitor opens up the menu for me and yet having to serve myself bread and water. Now, where exactly is the service?

Meaningful Weekend

We've just crosed over to Sunday and I'm quite happy with the way I've spent my time thus far, especially today.

Managed to book out early on Friday so I went home and swam 20 laps (1 lap= back and forth) before going to church for rehearsals. I'm in-charge of the chewing gum skit, a very short mime and it was challenging to direct it, and for the cast too. Being a mime, it requires a lot of big actions and expressions to engage the audience. I'm proud to report that it's progressing very well and promises to be absolutely hilarious. I was demonstrating to Cheryl how to open the package of a piece of chewing gum, which elicited lots of laughs from the other cast memembers but also a comment by Kris/Vinna that I looked gay. Heck it - acting is all about throwing away your own personna and jumping into whatever role you're supposed to be in.

For the record, Liz Lee also said I looked gay in the T-shirt I was wearing. For another record, the rest, including Adele, Sarah and Chrystal disagreed, saying that it was not since I was skinny. Oh well, the debate on whether Winston looks gay continues. Stay tune for the next episode "So, if Winston looks gay, is he gay?" Bleahx.

I took part in a financial game which I was invited to by one of my seniors. Developed by Robert Kiyosaki, author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad, the game was developed to educate the players on managing personal wealth.

The game is divided into two parts, the rat race and the fast track. The first goal is to get out of the rat race, in which one has to earn enough passive income to cover his expenses. Termed a "rat race", it characterises the financial situation of many people, who spend most of their time trying to work to earn money to repay their debt, finance their expenses - a never-ending cycle that most of the bourgeoise is caught in. If you're lost, active income refers to the income that you get from work/services that you provide. Passive income refers to income generated from investments that you have made ie. making your money work for you.

In the rat race, there are different slots that you can land on. Opportunities, where you pick a card which presents a deal, like an opportunity to buy a piece of property or stock. It includes ROI: the return on investment (passive income), liabilities etc. Given your existing capital, you then have to make a decision (in 1 minute). You can borrow money from the bank to finance your investment or choose to reject it. What this represents is the opportunities that come your way while the time limit is where you have to make a decision before it slips away. It is thus important to calculate whether it is financially prudent to take a loan. If your ROI is higher than the interest rate (i/r) of your loan, it represents good debt (you still earn money). The converse is true. Although this is a general rule of the thumb, one must take note that it isn't always the case. I shan't elaborate less my readers fall asleep reading this text...

I wasn't very lucky in the game. Firstly, I landed on the 'You have a child' slot, which meant that I had an additional liability and lost income on the child's expense. And, I kept landing on the 'Doodats' slot, which represent additional expenses, stuff that you spend on leisure etc. and getting cards like "Marry off your daughter $2000", "Pay for son's education $1500" and "It's your son's bday, spend $150 on trip to amusement park". I learnt that kids are expensive and so, I shan't have one so early in life.

In the evening, I went to a concert, a very special one. It was a great experience. The performer is a child prodigy whom at the tender age of 13 was putting up his very first recital. He performed a very difficult programme namely, Schubert's Fantasie in C major D760, Prokofiev's Sonata in B flat Major Op 83, Beethoven's Sonata No. 17 in D minor Op. 31/2 and Chopin's Sonata No. 3 in B minor Op. 58. For those who aren't really into music, which includes me (I've not tickled the ivory keys for about 2 years), the level of difficulty is basically harder than the Flight of the Bumble Bee, which means tons of scales and basically nifty fingerwork so quick that you only see a blurred image. Add that too memorising more than a 180 pages of score and you get an amazingly talented budding pianist.

The friend that I went with was a senior of mine, who worked with Maestro Tedd Joselson, a renowned pianist who studied at Yale's Julliard School of Music, got me free tickets for the concert. (A short background: He managed a perfect score for the A-Levels, is a great pianist and is headed for Cambridge to study Chemistry on a million dollar scholarship.) The performer is currently under the tutelage of Mr. Joselson so the connection figures. It was an eye-opener for me as this friend of mine introduced me to various people. I was able to mingle with those in the industry (an inappropriate term perhaps?) where I managed to dig up some gossip about my ex-teacher, and hobnob with those who come from the top tier of society. A little pretentious and also a little over-aweing. I met Josh (or was it john?) Green who currently teaches Econs at SMU, who is also an economist at the IMF; Lilian, President Ong Teng Cheong's sister. Amongst them also include other local performers... Frankly, I felt terribly insecure among all those bigwigs, didn't really know how to react. Oh well...