Blueprints for City Friendships

Drive to the Bus stop. Bus to Changi. Kayak to Pasir Ris. Walk home. Reverse.

When I hear the word LUXURIOUS... I think of two things.. Long hot showers. and Lazy uninhibited sleep.

If I cant pull of an eyebrow piercing no one else can..No, really, please don't pull it off.

I'm going to become a "full time writer".. which always sounds much nicer than "unemployed"

From Malabar to Malacca to Singapore to the Gold Coast. I trace my family lineage to the cities of the sea.

candy cane empire island city state

Playlist for 2009

New Years High

'Lollipop' Framing Hanley

'Just Dance' Lady Gaga

Obama's Inauguration

'Its a new Day' Wil.I.Am

Maybe March

'Sex is On Fire' Kings of Leon Cover/ In Current Standing

'I Turn my Camera on' Rock Kills Kids

'Love Save the Empty' Erin McCarley

Sundown Marathon Training

'All These Things that I have Done' Killers

'Handlebars' Flobots

'Sophia' Nerina Pallot

Happiness

'Portland Maine and the Pouring Rain' The City on Film

'I Can Feel a Hot One' Manchester Orchestra

'When did your heart go missing' Rooney

'Dismantle.Repair' Anberlin

Sad Times

'Inevitable' Anberlin

'My Favourite Accident' Motion City Soundtrack

Merry Month of May

'Break Even' The Script

'Green Light' John Legend

Holiday Season

'The Way I Am' Ingrid Michaelson

'Leavin' Jesse McCartney

'How Do You Sleep' Jesse McCartney

Anberlin Concert

'Adelaide'

'Day Late Friend'

Army Half Marathon

'I Got a Feeling' Black Eyed Peas

'Make it Mine' Jason Mraz

Birthday

'Weightless' All Time Low

'Cross my Heart' Mariana Trench

'Big Girls Don't Cry' Fergie

Pre-ORD High

'The War' Melee

'Mrs Officer' Lil Wayne

'Fun house' Pink

ORD

'Body Language' Jesse McCartney

'Most Beautiful Girl' Flight of The Conchords

'Empire State of Mind' Jay-Z

------

Looks like it hasnt really been a year for rock.

I wonder what december has in store...

"Lets have

a ce

le bra

tion

baaby"

Jesse mcCartney

of fish and flight

of fish and flight

by Rishik Vijayadas Menon

dear i fear

you know you love fishing too much

and while ive tried in vain to fall for the

cast of line and bait, in luckless faith

that nylon threads would draw us closer together

it seemed i proved too unromantic a

reeler to spin the odds to my favour.

alas I still have my tact, and tackle box

packed (not to mean intact)

I was able to take flight

off the jetty the next morning

mourning another wasted night,

trying and failing to get you to notice me.

being sensitive, and careful, noticing you

the most minute of oncoming sneeze

offering you tissue,

buying you lemon barley

rigging your lines

oh you have no idea

i would do your dishes!

...if only you gave me the chance

but like hook and master,

in spite of all our efforts

we simply could not connect to our

catch. so i thank god for small favours instead

that I did not have to open my box of

dettol plasters for one

and I suppose I remain in your regard

as that sub-species of men found in

the less favourable rungs of the evolutionary tree

more commonly known as "The Friend"

Ive not always been this impotent

though ive been known to let laundry soak

in the rain while I myself drift into

seas of luxurious afternoon sleep

in fact, I even had the audacity

to entertain notions of myself

wielding a competitive advantage

owing to my years of experience

of flying kites at the field

you see, dear, theres so much in common

with fishing and flying kites

you tie hope to the end of a string,

and throw it out into a sea of chance

and well wishes

with only instinct left to guide you

on how much to pull and let go

but the differences

'tween the two now dawn on me

as im waiting for the first bus

home to pasir ris without you

The type of prizes I sought after

while flying were momentary

snapshots of colour in the sky

while sun and wind dried my

heart into patient comprehension

of the beauty of solitude

Your game was tangible

and that was the crux of the matter

My art could not satisfy

your appetite for something real

if not always alive.

as vibrant as it might have been

that lack of direction or purpose

spelled the end of

what-just-might-have-been "us".

without anything definite to look forward to

I flew as long as the wind would let me.

if you like it..then you should have put a ring on it.

No comment. (or does this become a paradox?)

Why ask rhetorical questions?

I never use extremes!

Us lone wolves need to stick together.

The following sentence is true. The previous sentence is false.

The following sentence is false. The previous sentence is false.

Homophobia is gay.

Austerity at any cost!

stay educated

Im only 20 year old people. But im gonna make myself a promise.

I am going to stay educated!

Seeing as how I've run out of 'witty', and 'clever', and Mensa Singapore has kicked me out for not paying yearly subscription fees, its pretty much the best I can hope for. In the long run.

Its not a bad deal actually. all it takes is a little effort everyday to...

read

write

converse with people

listen to music

watch movies

try something new!

kay so its not exactly being educated. but something in between educated and cultured. you get the drift.

Janadas Devan has got it right. the guy is awesome. he doesnt show off a whole lot. but when he writes this quality about him shines through. his education. his cultured mature mind. he doesnt use academic lingo to build a barrier beyond the common man to show that he's better. He does it in the most simple of ways. engaging. shining light on new perspectives. introducing new ideas in moderate doses. serving bite sized portions of history, fact and anecdote. never extreme. but clearly passionate and confident about where he is heading or leaning towards.

how do you reach that stage in life? that ability to write so comfortably without falling into old traps doors of a particular niche' audience and crowd.

im thinking experience has to do with it. and a very conscious effort to stay relevant. to stay educated.

Let me contrast that to sXe Phil (Philip de Franco). I watch the guy's show on youtube and there are brilliant moments on quite a regular basis. Not easy considering its virtually a daily show. and i think to myself.

Its certainly possible. If you dedicate that much of yourself online everyday, your bound to come up with enough material to talk about. but dont you wanna move beyond talking about it? beyond mere commentating and reflection.

I guess the internet is full of that. witty comments. insightful and sharp reflections on society.

But blogs (or Vlogs) will never replace mainstream media or the news in particular. because there is no sustained focus online. topics fly and trends die in a blink of an eye.

and while communities might form, like the vlog brothers (the Nerd Fighters) or certain forum communities (even on Yahoo! Answers) these communities tend to be immersed neck deep in their own lingo and inner references and jokes. not exclusive. but private.

and while you can build a reputation for yourself online, also with experience, its simply not sustainable. people will forget you. you can pour your heart into issues over time, and become something of a credible force. but are people ever gonna say, "they wanna be like you"? cause its not gonna last forever. your only popular online for 10 minutes. and then they have their own lives to get back to. well at least for me anyway.

I wanna be popular WHILE im online. and then I wanna return to the normal world, and do normal things.

I guess what Im saying is, I think sXe Phil is a talent. who deserves to get out of youtube and do something bigger for society. cause he really is quite a smart-ass. and i mean that in the best sense. but he strikes me as a talent who is being wasted for an online audience who will forget him when his time is done.

and the other thing im saying is.. you dont get educated on the internet.

you get informed. you get striked with news your allowed to take in, and then you get to comment or blog about it.

you get access to google and wikipedia and dictionary.com and with a few clicks your capable of making obscure witty references and riding on trends and memes only comprehendable to a small few group of online peers.

but because its so easy to get that information, your so unlikely to remember it in the long term.

and when push comes to shove, your at a black tie cocktail party trying to make conversation, your ideas of things to talk about run dry and theres no google or wikipedia to pull you out of that hole.

so yes. I may belong to this wired generation.

but i still believe in education.

god forbid I don't let myself decay.

run for 5km

Sweet
Lime
Sugarcane

your the first girl
that made me wait

a day i missed
just spent on
counting minutes

to the last parade
and white collared train

trying hard to be different
but I feel the same

I cant resist
Ive got to
make you notice

Rose
Syrup
Carnation milk

I cant go on
while im feeling jilted

But you still insist
that "boy
I wish you made it

for the wine high banter
but it wasnt filled

cause i missed your laughter
could not sit still"

I fall in disarray

how could i not have known this?

--
more random thoughts and quotes.


Age: Its just a number... that signifies the number of years in your life.

I wanted to dedicate this post to The People of The World with Low Self Esteem.
But after thinking for a while, I realised they didnt deserve it.

"its okay to not have a dream. kids in africa dont.." (WTF!!)

"if you can run for 5km, you can run..forever!"

tuesday and lyrics

so as i recently discovered im actually quite a Pink fan.

"Funhouse" and "Please dont Leave Me" being the two turning points.

As if that discovery wasnt battering enough for my already fragile male ego, it turns out im also quite the unwitting jesse mccartney fan.

catching me off guard with "how do you sleep" and "leavin" (both of which I had no idea he sang), I recently went to great lengths to discover that the tune I have been humming the entire weekend was "body language" by, lo and behold, Jesse Mccartney!

sigh. or maybe its not sucha ego bruising after all. i mean. maybe jesse mccartney IS cool.. i mean he must be right? all the cool radio stations are playing him. haha. sigh. no, rishik. i guess faking enthusiam is just not within you.

its really not easy to track down songs stuck in your head by the way. driving alone at night listening to the two 98s of local radio, where one rnb track merges and melds into the next, certain hooks just have a way of ingraining themselves into your head. whether its a collective effort (as in the case of loosening the bottle cap) or not is beyond me. the quest to find out the lyrics of the sounds stuck in my head is challenging as it is. to discover the author of those sounds, and the name of the song truly is an achievement.

i mean really. try googling "konichiwa" and "lyrics" and see what you get. no joke. god knows how i managed to discover "Body Language" with just that one word.

BY THE WAY..

If anyone can help me with this other song i have stuck in my mind I will greatly appreciate it. This is how it sounds in my head. lord knows the actual lyrics but ive given up searching.

"im still on you. like my very first love.." yeah.. thats that.

not all songs are that hard to find though. take "empire state of mind" for one. surprisingly so, since you would expect loads of songs to have the phrase "in new york". but i guess the power of google is how its top searches also tend to be the more recent and thus current. and that definitely helps in a treasure hunt like the one I'm involved in.

Empire state of mind.. another great song by the way.. most of all, leaving me with this feeling of..

can we write something like that.. with that kinda feeling and emotion.. for singapore..

and i think the answer is yes. simply a matter of time.

but songs by themselves dont create patriotism. they reflect it. so what then creates patriotism? and what IS patriotism?

this feeling. that something is on the line. you have something to lose. this fear and sadness of losing on a collective level. (interesting how as im writing this out, its starting to sound like collective kiasuism.)

war creates this feeling. for sure. losing something on a collective level.

but no need to go to such extremes. cause sometimes competitions are enough.

i wont forget how pro-TJ lizzy became near the SYF band competition. that was school pride. she was out there to make a name for herself. by assoiation. as part of the collective. that was patriotism.

i think i felt it too last night at CHIJMES, watching the liverpool Man U match. there was patriotism around me. and the competition definitely fed it.

so is that what we need then? competition? is that why so many singaporeans are pushing for singapore to rejoin the Malaysia cup? cause its a cause for national pride. its a case when national pride was on the line. ironic, how one form of pride (which says we are too good to join the Malaysia Cup) is stopping another positive form of pride from being created.

which is why i think im gonna support the ABL. Im not a basketball fan. but for the first time, without any excuses, once again, national pride is on the line. and thats a good thing. this aint the olympics of the SEA games. this is a league. plain and simple. regular. and hopefully televised. with all the power, to breathe back some life and fight into a society with a suffocated sense of sporting pride and culture.

light it up

the great thing about the army, is how much material it feeds me for my writing.

how there is such prosperity of character and poetry over flowing, simply waiting to be harnessed.

for example, did you know the word "deepavali" was also metaphorically used to mean anything which is brightly lighted up.

"When driving overseas must be careful la. The roads there not as deepavali as singapore"

OR

"What the fuck! You never 'tactical' your torchlight?! you think this is deepavali is it?"

Happy Deepavali Singapore.

And may our street lights always overpower the stars of our city sky, in all its resplendent glory.

kopi shop soundtrack

Sweet.

Lime.

Sugarcane.

your the first girl

that made me wait

a day i missed

not spent on counting minutes

to the last parade

and white collared train

living the motion

not quite the same

my mind in disarray

how could i

not have known this?

Rose.

Syrup.

Carnation milk.

with an empty taste

my night is filled

a glimpse erased

its keeping me guessing

---

To be continued..

Rishik.

Old School

This is an essay dated 20th November 2007.

What Im ashamed to admit, is I dont really remember my own references to Jung and Schopenhaer anymore. I think its something to do with freedom and personal choice. heh. this is what 2 years in NS does to you..

Anyway..

Enjoy!

Punk is such a sad torrid farce, its not even funny anymore.

Now dont get me wrong. I still love jimmy eat world, something corporate and dashboard confessional. Helena by MCR, oh most definitely. I see no shame in listening to emo, indie, goth, rock, but I will punch you if you dare try and fit me into a typecast. I will intentionally wear what you dont wear to avoid looking like everyone else, and I will

So just what then do I make of everything I had said before this? Well.. I suppose nothing. Or maybe everything. Because thats the whole point isnt it?

All this culture and counter-culture, this action and reaction, is simply going to go on forever. There are forces beyond our control and im not talking about divine intervention. To borrow on a metaphor from both Jung and Schopenhaer, all of us are water molecules riding these waves and movements we know nothing about. Well not nothing, obviously. But thats another fine line. Of course right now, what im talking about is fashion.

No one would dare says they are independent of fashion trends unless they are seriously deluded. But neither do I believe we are slaves. Nor are these fashions the result of animals spirits. There is no doubt they are our own making. But how can something of our own creation take on a life of its own. Its beyond dynamic, its animated and emergent.

It would be most dishonest of me to tell you where the line is from the personal choice and the societal choice, and just how personal that choice may have been in the first place. And i dont know myself. But I do know I am getting tired. So Ill say simply this.

Ill buy my fossil watch today, and wear my sleeveless OBS tee tomorrow. Ill spike my hair and I wont. Ill just learn to appreciate as much as possible, and take in all I can. Because there is no one to differentiate between decent and prunish, sexy and slutty. No one is to tell me whats mainstream and whats a sell-out. Because it doesnt really matter. Except it most definitely does. And we are all victims of the machine and system. Perhaps context is all, after all. Perhaps. Or is that just my way of coping out and not really answering the question?

It most certainly is.

Good night.

so maybe its not my week after all

foolish young second lieut.

why must you start a fight

when your only just an NSF

and you already know that your right

is it worth the seven extra?

to let your pride retreat tonight

dont believe its wrong to be silent

its wise! why, some might say "polite"

hold your tongue now, good second lieut

we know your hearts alight

the time will come to let it go

but right now, its too damn tight

desire

a poem

by rishik menon

"have we met before?"

a plan sparkling in her eyes

teasing the world

her fingers curl

licked clean she exuberates

con fi dence

no she does not know

how her lips still smack

of chocolate.

sensual..

desire takes me

and I just wanna

cup the small of her arm

pull her in

and pass her

a packet

of tissue.

equivocate

There was this thingy on Facebook where you picked your top 5 indulgences.

so naturally i had to do it.

1. taking long hot showers

2. sleeping during lectures

3. rolling around in bed

4. chocolate chip cookie dough

5. joking/lying and forgetting to clarify that i was kidding

----

Being the dictionary.com sell-out I am, i present to you:

EQUIVOCATE!

equivocate \ih-KWIV-uh-kayt\, intransitive verb:

To be deliberately ambiguous or unclear in order to mislead or to avoid committing oneself to anything definite

...i love to equivocate.

But there are a few things id like to make clear.

Singing in the Rain IS my favourite song.

And this is a pretty damn awesome video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1q98m7qJ8g

----

Sucha sucker for romance

..

My favourite movies of post A level 2007.

"Stardust"

"Enchanted"

to think those times are over.

--

48 hours of rest is required after working out.

1 week to my driving test.

10 weeks to the standard charted marathon.

fast forward

fast forward.

i wanna start my day running. 5 am. in the dark, in the quiet calm.

i wanna sweat and pant and feel exhausted and detoxicated.

i wanna shower. and then have breakfast.

its a new day. i wont let my my past regret its future.

i wanna stay awake.

fast forward.

i wanna run an errand. be punctual if not early.

perform favours without obligations or habit.

i wanna know that i have time to kill.

and my weapon of choice is a paperback fiction novel,

or better yet the morning comics. dilbert. get fuzzy. zits.

i wanna feel lucky, even as i test my patience.

fast forward.

i wanna work. i want independence and purpose.

fast forward. i wanna perform. i wanna know that i excel.

fast forward. i wanna be rewarded. with words and praise and hugs.

fast forward. i wanna lead. i wanna feel my own destiny in my hands.

wrap up.

i wanna go home. i wanna go out to friends and society.

healthy pace. a light dinner. time to inflect and walk.

sharing my life. my stories. taking in someone else's. alert.

i wanna stay awake. i wanna pamper my body.

with another shower. and rest.

playing out.

a slow dwindling of energy. watching documentries or talk shows.

absorbing the world of people around me.

and exerting enough energy to maintain. clean. and wash.

fast forward.

i'll have to sleep. because what i want. is to stay awake.

weightless

manage me, im a mess

make believe, that i impress

I cant believe it myself. Its september.

September October.

Its time.

Sharpen. Refine.

I hit a new personal best of 19minutes for 5km.

I went for open mic last night.

1 star kayaking course is through.

Anberlin were amazing!!

Driving test in 3 weeks time.

Sigh.

But what I really want.

Is someone to talk to.

I want a woman to sit me down and tell me ten things I didnt already know and make me buy 12 things i never believed in, in the first place. I want a conversation, I want a good long story. Please, someone to make me laugh and bring me for a walk just so she can trip me over and make me fall into a trap or a prank or plot of common interest and life. not just a presumed overlap of social circle and understanding of pop culture references and personal banter, i want to be in formal introduction and touch your hand for a brief shake, if nothing else for tonight. I want to start from the beginning I want to shed all pretence, i want a reader i want a listener i want a talker i want her.. to be free from cynism for a change, be opinionated and open minded at the same time, where are you oh if you exist, and why dont you come on over and talk to me about your family and life and exams and plans and dreams and hands. im dying to listen, and not manipulate the conversation into a topic im comfortable with. no i want you to find me in as clean and clear as a state as I wish to be found. hungry and passionate for that someone for that argument. i want her to tell me Im wrong, in a way that Id actually believe it. I dont expect her to bump my fist in telepathic cammarederie. Im expecting and hoping for nervous laughter and reserve thats not restraining. and all the hope for the future wide open, without any preconceived notion and assumption of either music or silence.

and thats pretty much what I currently want.

ah well..

we dont always get what we want.

at least i had my apple crumble.

and I have my family.

=)

timely reminder

Chin up, lad, chin up.

good things happen to good people.

its all a matter of time.

jack of all trades, master of the univision

A thought experiment.

by Menon

There is a zebra crossing. The law gives right of way to the pedestrian when he crosses. Of course when no pedestrian is in sight, the car has right of way.

However the law did not take into consideration the existence of two scientists, simultaneously working on the invention of an invisibility cloak. Their names are Mr. Green and Mr. Zed. No one knows of their inventions as of yet.

One day both Mr Green and Mr Zed have achieved their life's work inventing the invisibility cloaks, in different parts of the same town. Mr Green throws his cloak around his car, and goes for a drive most undoubtedly invisible. Mr Zed throws his own cloak around himself, and goes for a stroll. Equally and unquestionably invisible.

By an unfortunate stroke of fate, the very moment Mr Zed crosses the zebra crossing, Mr Green drives straight through and the invisible car unknowingly knocks down the invisible man. Thankfully Mr Zed is still alive, but the case goes to court.

Mr Green argues he was not wrong as he did not see Mr Zed crossing. In fact Mr Zed most willfully avoided being seen, by wearing his invisibility cloak. But Mr Zed counters by claiming, Mr Green was being an irresponsible road user by choosing to stay invisible, which he clearly did. No pedestrian cannot thus be made to take the blame for an accident involving a car they cannot see.

clearly based on principle they are both right. so how then should the court rule?

and is the long term solution to outlaw the use of invisibility cloaks?

so good to be alive in sucha hazardous world

"Yeaah the war is won.."

Sigh. Is it premature to be indulging in such happy feel good liberational songs?

The war by Melee

maybe the measurements of distances are dodgy. but its no excuse. i still need to get faster.

16km- 72 mins

18km- 85mins

42km- 263mins

powerboating. kayaking.

heh.

ill keep trying new things out till it kills me.

going out with my nikon later today.

"so good! to be alive in sucha wonderful year"

antonio carlos jobin

I wonder now that Ive submitted another article to STForums, am I allowed to republish it here in my blog... hmmm.. maybe not.. maybe I'll just wait for it to be published and I'll just post the link here! wheee! =D

..

..

of course assuming they actually do use it..

hmmm. =\

--

So ive signed up for the Standard Charted Marathon. Oh yeaa. lets keep this pace going. Soon it'll be time for the Adidas Sundown Ultramarathon. 2010, heerree we go.

losing the benefit of your doubt

losing the benefit of your doubt

by Rishik V. Menon

a movie!

a party!

you make it sound so easy to faall in love

another weekend spend your evening chilling drinking

pizza!

some coffee!

maybe you could teach me your insincere

methods dear im losing faith in hopeful waiting

almost there

almost here

almost almost gonna see her

almost certain

almost sure

almost means "you'll never make it"!

---

To be continued...

Johari's window to Gordan's knot

4 years ago marc asked me what was the most superficial thing i cared about in people. and the answer was their voice.

im not sure how true it still holds. But i do know this.

I think I fell in love when I heard "Funhouse" by Pink.

God thats what I call a fucking sexy voice.

Invigoratingly alluring.

--

on another note.

Jesse McCartney has gone the way of Justin Timberlake. His voice has turned black.

"leavin" and "how do you sleep".

so i must admit it of course.

guilty as charged.

i liikee.

tum de dum.. im off.

run, read, write, shoot.. watch.. and listen..

--

Reading keane. sweet book.

call your shawty tell him you found a new man

midnight reveille

by shik

I lost my bike today

ever happened to you

one day you lock it

leave it at the bicycle stand, could be anywhere

maybe at the bus interchange. maybe under the block.

point is... you did what you could to keep it safe.

but in spite of all your efforts

chain and key are no match for the world

the world does that to you

it made me walk home pulling my hair in frustration

it made me send spiteful messages which i regreted almost at once

it made me hungry

it made me selfish

it made me take a cab

it made me think about you as I walked.

bikes are stolen all over singapore everyday

and i swear syndicates of thieves are behind these abductions

the bikes that are left unattended are bigger targets than the rest

unattended

this is where love forgot to come home

where love went for a walk on his own accord, and

love decided he could take a chance with chain and key

love isnt safe from the world

and every now and then

love too gets stolen

abducted

by individuals or maybe teams (if you believe in those conspiracies)

i walk home at night with no means to travel

but im still walking in the light

it sucks oh believe me it does la

but bo pian lor

life goes on in spite of the world

and if you can pull yourself together

your gonna find that

"fuck! fuck! im never gonna buy a bike again! ever!"

isnt quite..the most well thought out reaction..

the means to buy yourself another bike

aint lost. its there alright.

just gotta give it some time to make it work

and till then, i have one more reason to borrow my mom's car.

if one day, you come home looking for your bike

and find its not there, i want you to know

that you can call me.

a scream will let it all out,

so yell and cry that pain and useless feeling of helplessness

into that phone

so maybe the world might

overhear our communion

and how losing our bikes doesnt mean we are alone

tackle care

The new coalition for taking what you want

By Rishik Menon

so you calling this

freedom

leaving me

dreaming

you I we and a little

cycle with no reason

maybe you will stop short

whos in for the long drop

little hope will take you

to my heart at the roof top

moon light almost patient

glasses hide amazing

eyes and a smile

sinisterly so appraising

wow

...

I think i see

i think i see

i think i see

the sense behind these words now

its an opportunity

cold hands excuse

my company

unless that what you

want is not some

simple sweet complicity

hear the words

gorgeous

and here i love the

genius

play off on positions such

we start to feel we serious

closely lose our dinner plans

far enough to understand

nights the time

forget your pressing

curfews and that other man

ow

...

I think i see

i think i see

i think i see

the person she needs me to be

could it smell excitement

nostalgia or innocence

either or or maybe for the

chance to stop an accident

so message me by 2 am

a weekday ill take off again

another cat, basking in your

magic tame illuminance

with nothing left to stop

I find

your not gonna change

my mind

wings are left too far behind

plunge seemingly dangerous

so I may stay unprepared

for records of no regrets

locking chances sailing

to a sea quite mean yet

wonderous

now...

I think i see

i think i see

i think i see

theres no way i can make it out

---

air pork and bad timing

"i love the way you say goodmorning"

Ingrid Michaelson

well its June27th and the world is still turning. michael jackson is dead, and so is farah fawcett.

to be honest this celebrity news doesnt affect me. im really not that sad.

cause people die all the time. people who actually matter to our lives.

trivia tabloid like this. its dribble.

2 years ago my grandma passed away. well, 2 years 2 days. and its funny cause the night before I was happily chatting on MSN. and the conversation took one of those unexpected deep serious turns to death. so before i went to bed, i felt suddenly awakened. and aware. like there was this presence around me. and i cant say what it was, but i definitely felt something, like a soft white light. i slept well. it completely slipped my mind what day it was and the significance of it till the next morning.

morale of the story

you dont need to believe in god to feel blessed.

needless to say lifes not simple at all, but you cant blame me for pretending it is.

h1n1 is just one of those really terrible serious things that can really mess the many plans you might have had.

and yes its true. im afraid to go clubbin because of swine flu. haha.

and other plans too. like family visitng from overseas.

sigh. i know im broke. but im feeling a sudden obligation to meet my friends. so we work around excuses like birthday parties and movies.

still. still Im waiting for that time when we can do without excuses. too much to ask for. but i can wait.

wait for a point when we have progressed beyond formalities and introductions. and luck might have it that time and space (and commitments) are in our favour. so all I feel obliged to offer, is my own thoughts and honest conversation without image to uphold or ego to butter. there is no game to play. my logic makes even a chase sound boring. "as boring as a chase." i can imagine that.

but im a runner. you must forgive me my passions.

im hungry. for food.

did i mention its a saturday?

its june 27th.

this is the best there is to offer. take it or leave it. the worlds your bitch.

wake up. grab a brush put on a little make up.

You have no idea how hard it was to come up with this list.

sigh..

but it has to be done

.

of course i know its gonna be impossible to NEVER eat any of these foods ever again.

which is why (in the spirit of the Flying Spaghetti Monster) I shall name this list my

"really rather I didnt" list of foods.

its a start. viva la health revolution.

--

"so whats the point of living?"

"health, art, love, happiness, beauty...?"

Nice

I find the term "love marriage" a disturbing one. Because it reminds me that there can actually be any other type.

--

"There's a hole in my sock."

"There supposed to be a hole in your sock la, fuck"

--

Id like to think that the majority of singaporeans are actually secretly patriotic. Like when we saw the newflash that Singapore won Pedra Branca; and in a synchronised spontaneity our arms shot up in cheer.

But I guess these things dont happen everyday...

--

all my foreign friends. and excuses to go out and meet them.

but the best are those you dont need an excuse to see.

the ones that leave you feeling..nice.

genius secrets revealed magic

"who i am hates who ive been"

Relient K

"i wont let my past regret its future"

All Time Low

it pays to wake up early

it pays to wake up early. sometimes.

but im gonna sleep now. 

-

Running at east coast park, that best thing is running into meeting you know. 

spruyt, prem, sugu, simar, kenneth, aunty suja, lizzy. 

and meeting new people too. 

And night cycling from east coast park to changi village. ahah. my god, what an adventure. 

gears and flat tires, handlebars and wallets. 

by god I love this good clean fun.

so now im awake.

after watching/sleeping to

Hes just not that into you.

Definitely Maybe.  

Back in the real world. My mind knows better than to find hope in movies.

But with a sun as warm as that, shining through my window at the moment, Im finding my return to cynicsm being delayed. lets hope i dont do anything stupid in the interim.

which is why its best for me to go sleep right now.

its too late so say goodnight, so good morning 

goodmorning. 

to you.

Sweet Lime Sugarcane

will ferrel? I didnt know land of the lost was a comedy. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dI_3BjIeiD0&feature=PlayList&p=679F7E1000FF4F28&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=36

everyone deserves a nice dream

cant believe nadal lost. its not fair. how.

that orange juice is so pulply i feel like I should chew before swallowing.

I swim as fast as a fat man runs.

the kind of guy that gets fit by walking an unnecessary 2km everytime he misses his stop.

 

I must be a nerd to understand half of all the references made in "Get Fuzzy". Yes i think its official, guys. Get fuzzy is a geek comic. 

He's not gay..just cause he has a flower in his hair... hmmm...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NH_lOvsF5GE

aku boleh makan... nasi lemak!!

Gonna book my practical test for September. I can win Kiran! Just believe..

---

Sundown Marathon. First Marathon in my life. 

Out of the few thousand of participants. My ranking.

104

Its not astounding.

But it feels sweet.

No stress. June has just begun.

thoughts on the rich and famous

you obviously know that smrt buses arnt making too much revenue from advertising when they still have a giant Nikon D60 parading around Boon Lay and Pioneer on bus 182. Either that or nikon is so rich, they have decided to go out and advertise ALL their dslr models. 

sometimes i wonder about this economic recession. like could it be that i am having better conversations with taxi drivers these days. because more well educated singaporeans are being forced into jobs like driving taxis which they previously wouldnt have to do. or could it be that all the nice makan places near my houses are super packed, because those who would usually eat outside in nice fancy posh places have decided to go budget eat at not so nice but still pretty okay ish places.

its justa theory. 

the hindu times "I take leave I got flare!"

Im surprised to find myself so fascinated by sarees.

but they were oh so pretty.

gorgeous. that was the word. and to touch touch. ah. 

makes me an instant fan.

And while im on the topic of India (is it racist to associate sarees with India? or is that just race-related?) Im gonna talk about supporting a team for the IPL.

season two has just ended, so here is a good question. 

Which team does one support? 

Unlike EPl and soccer, the IPL has only just started. There are no clear favourites. There is no history or tradition which any one team has more so than any other. You could arguably support a team based on merit. Or based on style of play. But in twenty twenty, i honestly cant really see any distinct styles existing. Its all more or less about the same thing. hitting big runs and taking wickets. So at the end of the day I suppose picking a team comes down to several random factors.

The players. the City. The colour of the jersey. 

While the teams as entities lack any history or character, most of the players are already national stars in ODI, T20 and Test. Unfortunately for me, most of my favourite international players ended up being scattered across different teams. 

Murali playing in Chennai, RP Singh in Hyderabad, Malinga in Mumbai, Vettori in Delhi and Ishant Sharma in Kolkata. 

So I suppose players arnt that important then. No matter which team you eventually support you find a need to support its players and they grow on you.

when it comes to city I suppose things become much clearer. Let heritage and ancestry guide the way. Completely random its almost fair and natural. I dont usually advocate such tribalistic patriotism, but in this one instance, im willing to make an exception. So that brings me down to the three south indian cities/teams in the league. 

Bangalore, Hyderabad and Chennai. Ahh.. At least now we are getting somewhere. narrowing our options. To make things even clearer I decided to eliminate Bangalore, what, me having no blood whatsoever coming from that direction.

So it was down to the Chennai SuperKings and the Deccan Chargers.

In season 1, SuperKings performed incredibly well. With stars like Murali, and Dhoni, they easily made it to the finals, only to lose to Rajasthan. The Chargers on the other hand finished last. Winning only 2 games in the entire league. 

In a way this made the difference between the two teams more striking. A high flyer vs a barrel scraper. My choice of who to support was no longer a matter of whim. It was a test of character and personality. How would I choose!? And So it was down to colour.

In season 1 both chennai and hyderabad sported disgusting yellow and beige jerseys which was very dissapointing for me, as i hate yellow. But then came news that the chargers were going for a makeover. new jersey, new logo, new captain, new coach. In a way this spirit added just that much more character to them. I was starting to lean towards them. 

The new jersey colour was dark blue. I was sold. Mid season, right before the semi finalists had qualified, The Deccan Chargers became my pick for the season. 

Bottom of the table in Season 1, Champions in Season 2.

Everyone loves a good underdog story. 

--

and so to round up a night of indian fun

AR Rahman's 'Jai Ho'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejKfQpzIdIY

YES the original version! No Pussycat dolls! =)

Not that i dont like their version.. It just ticks me off that people can like them so much.

haha. No its not jealousy. Kay maybe it is. Ah fuck it. This version is nicer because i say so.

And with that, Im off!

lions and swordfish (a working title)

Ive got so many things I wanna do right now and wriitng isnt exactly on the top of the list. But ive still gotta keep this in record before its gets lost in the dreamland (before time) of my memory.

so ill keep it short.

What went right

Learning new things, like driving and photography

Pushing my limits like in running

Feeling accomplished and strong

Speaking to strangers

Appreciating beauty around me

Making improvements and feeling progress 

Staying calm and zen

Talking to people about things which are intangible..like people

Commiting myself to the future

Taking care of my health and beauty

Taking time to listen to music and read

What went wrong

Still spending too much money

Still not getting enough sleep

Still not giving my body enough time to recover and rest

Still too damn nice. But thats okay.

So life is good. 

Breathe deeply, eat lightly, stay mentally and physically active and love the people around you.

I think my day went alright so far. 

God permit my attitude and frame of mind keeps this up.

Now im gonna swim. 

Clutch.Gas.Release Clutch.Hold Clutch.More Gas.Release Clutch.

And roll.

dammit. i guess this is growing up.

And now...Just for fun..a small glimpse into the kinda things I hear in songs, before making the effort to google the lyrics online. 

I want to hold your hand by the Beatles

What I HEARD

"I wanna comb your hair, your hair..." (You'd think the song title would have given it away)

The LYRICS

"I wanna hold your hand, your hand..."

God's Love by bad religion

What I HEARD

"And what im frightened of, is that they call it dodge ball!" (it was the anti-climax of it all that inspired me to find the lyrics)

The LYRICS

"And what im frightened of, is that they call it god's Love!"

My Favourite accident by Motioncity Soundtrack

What I HEARD

"I got the message on the phone, you said you knew~" (I actually kinda like my version)

The LYRICS

"I got the message long before you said you knew~"

Safe in a crazy world by Corinne May

What I HEARD

"You understand me. Embrace my fertility. You keep me safe in a crazy world" (oops! sorry Corinne.)

The LYRICS

"You understand me. Embrace my fragility. You keep me safe in a crazy world"

Im Yours by Jason Mraz

What I HEARD

"Ive been spending way too long checking my tummy in the mirror" (to be fair, im not the only one who heard tummy!)

The LYRICS

"Ive been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror"

Miss Independent by Ne-Yo

What I HEARD

"she move like a wock, and do like a wock, and got me thinking about the jabberwock...Thats the kinda girl I need!!" (haha. come on. who really listens to lyrics of RnB songs anyway!?)

The LYRICS

"she moves like a boss, do what a boss do, she got me thinking about getting involed... Thats the kinda girl I need!!"

So beautidul by dashboard confessional

What I HEARD

"Its not the salad you ate but the shell!" (I actually believed this was some deep metaphor or something)

The LYRICS

"Its not the sale that you love its the sell!"

bedroom talk by the starting line

What I HEARD

"Im gonna tear your ass up, like we just got married, and your all mine now"

The LYRICS

"Im gonna tear your ass up, like we just got married, and your all mine now" (..oh. So i didnt imagine these lyrics wrong.. hmm. =S thats actually almost sad)

--

and this weekend was full of small achievements. photography. poetry. driving. shopping. play-watching. eating. strumming. and of course tomorrow, running and cycling.

for a better body! HOO HA!

Im off. 

communist pig

i understand giving. i understanding taking. i dont know why, but im just super uneasy with the idea of sharing. just gets on my nerves.

i guess communism isnt meant for me.

---

"We Just Dont Care(PDA)" vs "Delicate"

we might make out...when nobody's there...its not that were scared...its just that its..delicate.

lets make love...maybe somewhere they might discover us...

hahah. and i like them both.

---

Spider Thread

by risheek

Spider thread

catching my attention spam

ming across the distance

tween that sunlight and some indecision

of my steps towards your

hopeless ambition

its timing.

thats lead us to this alarming 

charm so surreal coruscating 

sparkles start to steal

the magic from the lime and shine 

from eyes across the room to mine 

well what but I

and I feel fine

and your so pretty 

sing pretty lines

to me, to me

you see,

but only for a while

before i lose you to the light

yes you

your so pretty for tonight

spider web

catch my admiration

agaisnt the odds and angles of elevation

your focal length merely 

agravates the time itll take me

to get away from your sight    

well what but I

and I feel fine

and your so pretty 

sing pretty lines

to me, to me

you see,

but only for a while

before i lose you to the light

yes you

your so pretty for tonight

tonight will last me all my life

--

my home is the most awesome bed and breakfast. 

loves it.

...

"Do It alone" by Sugarcult

And hell have I done it alright. for longer than i imagined.

Jamie Scott & The ParkTown-bench theories

working on two poems right now.

'weather' and 'spider thread'. Hope itll be done by June. 

sigh. busy time in the office. but its MayDay, so i think it was only right, that I went cycling this morning to the tune of MP3s ive not changed since nov 07. gosh time flies. if its not on 2 wheels its too slow. 

Flashback.

You should not marry the person you can live with.

rather someone you cant live without.

but that simply doesnt sit with reality. 

human spirit is too strong for that. 

my thoughts?

its a slow steady fire. that cant be put out with absence. only a change of mind. 

"100 years of solitude" is a beautiful book. 

but as a matter of personal preference I prefer "birds without wings".

maybe its because ones a transalation and the other is an original. 

My current favourite song is Sophia by Nerina Pallot.

Played in my head the whole way as I jogged 27km, from Pasir Ris to East Coast. 

Maybe this weekend I can break the 30km barrier. heh. 

ill need more songs.

the most awesome song from the movie Transformers

"baby come back" by player =)

--

If I become a newscaster I wonder what my goodbye call would be like? 

DFTBDFTBDFTABA

Tis Official. the offer from UCL. 

.

The weathers been insane lately. But it rained today. 

And I wont say it made my heart sing. 

But rainy Sundays at home always lift my spirits.

--

You know what else is cathartic? Taking the MRT at 5 or 6 in the morning. 

and staring into the clouds. 

Especially if the journey takes you from Pasir Ris to Pioneer. 

yes its true. Id pick coffee over alcohol anyday.

Sad how fast days fly by. 

But we do the best we can in this sleepless city

and we got the soul to play the part of soldiers..

for 2 years at the very least.

--

And one last thing before I go

Pop Song by Jon LaJoie

"Hey, baby, baby, I can tell 
That you are crazy crazy
Shake that ass, girl
My rhymes are getting lazy, lazy
These things I'm talking bout have
Nothing to do with the song, baby
But it don't matter 
Wont you show me that thong, baby"

--

Im off.

Doubling Back Now: The rant

Disclaimer. Good way to start: I have nothing clever to say.

Not that I ever did. Though I loved to pretend at times that I spoke

wiser than I intended. And maybe intuition and gut genius could

lead me to greatness.. or at the very least popularity, fame,

and lots of friends. But the whole charade is just leaving me very

tired at the moment, and Id rather not pretend to be witty or the like.

But I do know this. Im sincere. When I shoot its from the heart. 

When I hate its cause im hurt. When im irreverent its not out of 

a desire to rebel but a sense of injustice and honest disregard. 

Simple regretless, lack of respect which I plainly believe is undeserved.

I may not be straightforward. I may love my playful lies to unhealthy

extents. I beat around the bush, and encrypt and euphemise my language

for fun and even for concern. But i dont care what anyone says. Im a nice

guy. And I know its true. If I mean well, I know I do. If i butter up and flatter

its cause its a fucking delight to. Even when I fall into the lows of

hateful sarcasm the dichotomy of my options are straightforward. 

Apology or honesty.

But I really dont know how I came to this. To talk so much about myself. 

Am i being defensive? I dont know. Is this what it feels like to be defensive.

Defenseless. Its a possibility. Nonetheless its not what I thought I would write

when I first turned on my computer. I had something else in mind. Something

that went more along the lines of this...

---

"Rishik why arnt you seeing anyone at the moment"

The reply I wish I had the sense to say: "Im still not ready"

Im afraid if I stay near anyone for too long, Id fall hopelessly for her.

Its a risk.. 

I dont like to think about. 

But i have thought about this.

This is exactly what i didnt want to happen. Where you dont even know

how to act like a friend anymore. Stone and cold and silent and lousy. 

You start to make a farce out of communication and affection. 

This is exactly what i didnt want to happen. Where maybe your afraid 

that any sign (any sign!) will end up being the wrong sign. So you become

signal-less, and redundant to my life, and I might as well go punch a wall

cause at least Newton's law is kind enough to give me that basic love

of reaction that all matter is entitled to.

I have not thought this through very much yet.  

that is quite true.

But you know my life isnt that bad.

Im running quite happily. I got my IPPT Gold. Im running the Sundown.

Im in the CSSCOM Team for the army half marathon.

Ive passed my BTT. My plans to get my driving licence are on track.

And I have confidence in my plan to get my powerboat licence too.

I still read. I still write songs. I still play my guitar. I still watch plays.

I still go back for drama. Im even serious about taking my interest 

in photography to the next level. I still go for long walks at night. 

---

But that shit doesnt comfort me anymore.

Not like it used to. 

So rishik-the-ever-troubled finds something new to be sad about?

Wrong. No. Not like that at all.

Maybe the distraction of personal-development has finally stopped 

working. And the root problem that was always there simply...

remains...always there.      

Bingo. Hammer on the nail sherlock/einstein/batman.

So I guess Ill just go now and give our lives some time.

We always need a little more time. 

But not to get over it. and grow apart. 

I pray you dont stick to foregone conclusions.

maybe just to give me a chance. 

But not all of us are acceptable with giving chance. 

And thats eating me as Im thinking all this.

The truth that people hate to be wrong, and would rather change 

themselves and their own mind. Just to stay right. 

Its so sad. But hard to admit. And even harder

for me to accept. But well...dear.. if you do change.

I hope its not born out of any poorly-formed notion

of doing me any so-called favour to help me move on. 

---

Lord thank you for the strength to stand at all. 

Thank you for the love that cradles my fall.

Thank you for the courage to keep me valiant and true

Please forgive me for my sins, if I know not what I do.

A quiet prayer, I first uttered when I was 14, walking home from school.

I used to utter it everyday. 

Until it got to the point when I was 17 and all I could say was 

"thank you. give me strength. thank you. thank you. 

and please give me strength."

Because life was so beautiful and I didnt know if it could get any better. 

If life can get any better. Hmmm. I know I have my doubts.

My Atha has passed away, But I still believe in love.

So Im just gonna give it some time. And hope. 

And thank god ive had the strength, to stand this all.

when music doesnt help

"I got the message long before you said you knew
There was no chance of us at all"

My Favourite Accident
by motion city Soundtrack

"Why cant I feel anything for
anyone other than you.."

Cute without the e (Or cut from the team)
By Taking back Sunday

"and I cant stop pretending
that your forever mine"

Dressed to Kill
A New Found Glory

arial size ten

maybe im falling apart
by rishik

Just give me 4 years in advance
to make amends
to what ive done
i cant pretend
that I wont try
to make things worse..

OH! to see things work
out all for you
its not a phase
that I am willing to
go through right now
I need for you to huurrt..

listen to my lies
and bad advice
you know how much
I dont think twice
about the sad and tragic
build of consequence

I dont have a plan
just my heart in hand
and a misplaced sense
of wrong and jealous pain
yet tonight you'll see me
give it all its worth

~

but didnt you already know it?
talked like you knew it all along
and if your surprised, well you dont show it..
and i cant be fucked to prove you wrong.

~

Im kidding time
to play forgiveness
as if Im big enough
to live this wave
of crashing dreams and
false memories to the deep

its my fault again
that i keep relent-
lessly pursuing downright ends
with painful courses
god wont allowed this
to repeat

~

but I guess I already knew it...
that you dont love me anymore
and if you do, well you dont show it..
and it hurts to think you wont prove me wrong

Time to Field

Time to Field the Bench
by Rishik (otherwise known as Dee Wy)

I sit there next to you
you crying, not me, you see
i see time aflying, although
you know, I have places to go
I sit there, unsure
next to you, you crying.
Some stare, as I smile
Im just awkwardly trying
to find a space that is more
than less accurately depicting,
my role, who knows
how i was cast in this setting
where I sit there, sincerely lost
as you sit there, so-simply crying.
I'm late, I hope you know
But you just sit there crying
your forgiven i guess,
your allowed to be uncaring
to my needs, and my appointments
and my discomfort of placing.
Girl, dammit, I got to go
But you sit there, crying.
still I can't leave you, on your own,
No not while your sitting there,
make up running.
I wonder if its necessary,
my patient, hesistant precence
cause come on your on the phone
not that thats an excuse
to take my absence.
rude to leave without sayin goodbye
rude to interupt when people cry
is it rude to sms, while im standing by
is it rude to buy some custard puffs
its looking good enough to try.
I wonder how we look,
side by side. as we sit here.
you crying.

constantine maroulis?

This is a story of listening to advice from bad dreams and
feeling a blurring between imagination and memory.


Forgive my past so I dont ruin my present.


silver ribbon project. go find out more if you can.


"your such a grateful boy!"
"why thank you!"

---

The things I do for conversation.
And the things I do when I dont feel like it.


Im off!

Live high

have you ever seen something so beautiful in your life!
oh wait, im sorry. i take that back. that was an invitation
to comparison. and quite frankly ive seen beauty all around me
for as long as i can recall. wow. butterflies at the window,
squirrels and mynahs playing, perhaps having a quarrel, below
that stouter than average, fun-sized angsana. oh i love it love love it.
wind chymes, water jets cleaning the condo's common area, a steady
muted tribal beat of construction piling and catching a kingfisher in the
same act of voyeaurism your currently indulging in. outstanding.

nails are wet after washing a bowl that was emptied to fill me
with the simple lightness of bread and luncheon meat. toes are dry
and toughened after years of neglect, and overwork, but propped
up on a bed meant for a sibling, both of whom live 9 hours away,
its getting all the rest it ever asks for; and it never asks for much.

he said 'take care', and hell am i taking care alright. my body, my
room, my mind. and ill help myself to some pride while im at it.
this zen is good, and im safe and secure and glad for it. my prime
driver has been satisfied i suppose, and now im relishing what was
always there. cant say im not spoilt. but im the best kind. the kind
that knows hes being spoilt and as a result appreciates everything
all the more tenderly. i know it i know it, and lord how i love it love it.

its gotten to my head. nostalgia, dreams and the love for long walks.
independence was over-rated but you had the idea all wrong, friends.
it not the cash to go, or the time to let go. well then again. maybe time
is right, but then get me wrong bout the idea of letting go. all i mean
is..lepak? chillax. no dont allocate a time for it to happen. it just makes
its own time, see? its not traveling all the way to some starbucks or beach-
park. its in between the freaking trips between work and home, and
just before you got to bed and realize you have 2 hours to spare and
no more work can be done for the night. lets take another bath. and
watch a movie. cash-easy, live easy. smell good, feel good, keep talking
and going out, and everything has fallen into place. we dont want a revolution.
not tonight anyway.

out with the in old with the new

talking about olden day thinking, andrea, drama and chicken pox.

and im not one for superstition.

but heres somethign interesting my master sergeant in NS

told me about when I told him I didnt sleep on Sunday night.
If you cant sleep well, there is a spider near your bed.
And i mean come on. Who believes that stuff..
But.. there it was. The little cobweb on the top left corner of my bed.
Tiny fellow. I wont say it gave me the chills cause it
really is not that surprising, or that big a coincidence.


but it did give me something to think about.



"If you cant sleep, look around your bed. There is probably a spider
hiding somewhere there. could be any size. but it will be there.
Once you clear the spider, you'll be able to sleep already."



o_0.

------





And Song Lyrics these days. really reflecting the new(MODERN??)
world we live in.
I dont know why. Lyrics like this.





"My life would suck without you"
My Life would suck without you by Kelly Clarkson



"If you text it I'll delete it, Lets be Clear"
The 7 things I hate about you by Miley Cirus



I mean. all these modern day references to texting,
and all these slang terms like "suck" appearing in the freaking title.
Its leaving me unsure.



Has their time really come? Or are they forcefully using these words
and terms to try and prove just how young and hip they are?

Or am I thinking too much?
haha. the ever present final option by all questions asked by rishik.



--
Breakfast at mifa's was sweet.
Love the Dark Knight man.



But not the same way I love 'Little Miss Sunshine'.

Like I can actually watch Dark Knight a few times.
whereas Im so obsessively in love with Little Miss Sunshine
I feel a weird need to ration out the number of times I watch it.
And also caue its infinitely sad, and I cant keep letting art
make me feel that way.


hmm. maybe ill geta dark knight poster for my room. justa thought.




so Im done for the day. gnight.


"and we sing ord-ohhh~

Fade to Reflect

ive discovered someone on youtube.
who is currently number 1 in my list of hot youtubers.
wow.
she can sing. she looks hot. and we share taste in music!
ahha. i love how i talk as if I really know her. right. anyway
heres the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOvFt8v313s&feature=channel

...

And in the history of my blog.
I have never done this before.
Post up lyrics of other people.
But what the heck. I like this song.
"Slow Down" by Academy Is


Close the door and take the stairs.
Up or down?
Ups and downs.
Don't pretend you've never been there.
You kiss me like an overdramatic actor who's starving for work,
with one last shot to make it happen.
You've won the role, you've played your part, you've been cordially invited.
But I'm not impressed, and I'm definitely not excited.
'Cause the film runs a shallow budget,
and the writer's subject script isn't any deeper.
So dive right in...


Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
hey you, who are you kidding?
I'm not like them. I won't buy in.
Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
hey you, who are you kidding?
Don't quit 'til 47.
Then we'll turn it up and we'll play a little faster.

[Chorus:]
Take back everything you ever said.
You never meant a word of it. You never did.
Take back everything you said.You never meant a word of it.
You never did.


She said 'Alright, Alright, slow down!"
Oh no, oh no, we won't.
'Cause I regret every thing that I said
To ever make her feel like she was something special,
Or that she ever really mattered.
Or did she ever really matter?


Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
hey you, who are you kidding?
I'm not like them. I won't buy in.
Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
just don't count on this summer.
Don't quit 'til 47.
Then we'll turn it up and we'll play a little faster.

[Chorus]

I'm not saying that I'm not breaking some hearts tonight, girl.
Oh...I'm not saying that I'm not breaking some hearts tonight, girl.


Alright, alright, slow down...
[Chorus]

Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
hey you, who are you kidding?
I'm not like them. I won't buy in.[x3 to fade]


--
Fade.

awesomeness

What i love the most about my group of friends and our gatherings.


the talking.


Sigh. Just dont let it stop. not for a moment.
and when there is silence its always a happy calm.


i wanna hear their stories
dreams
mis-adventures, philosophical theories,
plans of action, jokes, reviews of the latest movies,
opinions about ex-teachers, gossips,
discoveries, just keep the tales coming
and the conversation rolling.

---

"were coming home again" Green Day

---

the Movie Slumdog Millionaire is really a feel good movie. About luck and destiny and victory against the odds. and I love the movie.
Such a simply beautiful work of art.

But the book. wow. THAT tale. I cant even begin to break it down. Genius in the way, the whole while you presume its a similar tale of luck. But the twist at the end changes the entire paradigm of the book. And suddenly it becomes clear luck had very little to do with it. This was a tale of destiny and making your own life. and thats what I loved most about it. It wasnt about achieving the victory. He had already won from the start of the book. It was about how you can make your own life, and control your own faith. That was what Q & A was really about.

and i really like that theme so much. the idea of self control.
I think maybe thats why I love the song "Handlebars". Its about the possibilities that open up from within. About what can be achieved even without outside help.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuTlIo1Zr4&feature=channel_page
--
Anyways im off.

the short history of writing

Its come to my attention, that I no longer feel a need to write poems.
And its not a bad thing at all. No..

Its very easy to understand, once you know my personal history
and how i even got started with writing.

Itall has to do with st pats.
Beause the sad truth is, as english-speaking as the place may be
my entire time there, I had almost zero creative outlet.

When people asked what cca i wanted to join, i said without
thinking, ELDDS. Young stupid 13 year old. No idea that there
was NO ELDDS at that time!! I was heartbroken.
But not to fear. There was still lit at that time

Lower sec, I lapped up all there was to learn about literature.
It wasnt a science of disecting language. To me it was just one thing,
plain and simple.
A chance to enter another world: one of culture and poise, and education.
A chance to appreciate writing, and be caught up in the moment.

Lo and Behold. St pats did me another great favour by
NOT offering lit to upper sec. to ANY CLASS.

Zit. No Class. Science. Arts. It was.. a loss cause.
I would never get to know lit again. So off I went to sec 3e1
and that was more or less when it really started.

The secret writing, the scribbles, the only outlet and form of
expression i vaguely had.
It was weak in every sense. structure, vocab, meaning.

But it was what i clung to. It was my escape. Its all I had between
prefect meetings, and scouts, and lessons.
It was pathetic, but it was reason enough to keep my faith in the arts.
The fact that it made me that much happier.
That it gave me that much more faith in myself to achieve the vision
that Mrs Nelly Leslie set for us at the start of 2005
"To Become Cultured Young Men of Poise, Pride and Passion".
It became a part of me.


To cut the long story short.. Things changed.
Not drastically. Not overnight.
But over time they did.

I was exposed to real literature, in every form in JC:
movies, music, novels, poems. Real art.
I truly understand beauty.
My dream came true (and I fucking swear, this had been my
DREAM in the most literal sense, since I was a kid)
to actually act in a production.
And yeaah. I got what i wanted.
I got to appreciate beauty. taste it feel it love it live it.
I got the experience I had been deprived the bulk of my teenage life.


and now im happy. Satisfied. I dont have to write anymore
to feel the same joy. I am actuallyt truly content that
now I know good writers and artists out there.

and thats all I really wanted in the end.



---
Another random thought


clubbing attire geared for moshing rather than dancing?
You know where your heart really lies.

..
Im off.

love of a mother

i had no idea, that when running the sweat on your body could dry
up and form salt.

dry salt.

=S

---

Anyway I clocked approx 32 click. has to be more, because i also
ran to the big spash and back.

Must do Nigel poud. haha.
Dude is enlisting tomorrow. Hope he does well.

--

Just watching TV. Uncle Taxi has met Crazy Ang Mo. =S
Singapore is a very very strange country.
But i love it. haha.

goodnight

A crush on youthfulness OR
The Quarter Life Crisis
by RishikVijay menon

you got a new shoe
and i wonder if its pairred up
to your new hopes and
we dont like to set up any
long term plans
because the state of
our hands are still too
fragile..
fraid of losing
tingling chilling thrilling



but im goal-
centred
and i know that you
love to hear me
sounding interested
in maybe more than
school results and
parties, fabrics meant
for generational
cohesion
why you need to
prove your seasoned
is beyond me.

but girl,
i dont doubt you
but youve got right to
doubt my reasons
expired virtues
may be the
least of all your problems
but given a chance
ill prove im new
to this romance
as long as words
dont escape before
tonight.


cause before long
Ill be long gone
and falling
asleep.
without you.

--

"Slow Down" by Academy Is

put the blame on the eclipse

Quotes of the day.





(Telling a story) "You know, when me and prem worked at barfly"
(repeating last sentence for effect)"Prem worked at barfly!?"
(genuinely surprised)"How do you know prem worked at barfly!?"
(shocked out of words to respond) "..."
(Me, a third part listening. )"HAHAHA!"





sigh. that was some priceless shit.
That was between dharvin and selvam by the way.


--
Another priceless moment.

Walking with mom to changi village.
(getting really excited)"want to sprint!!"
"..are you sure??"
"ya ya! Sprint!"
"okay. eh. after you."
(mom starts sprinting, I chase after.)



after reaching the sign i stop, turn around and wait for my mom.
(as she runs 2m past me) "i win yooou!!"

hahaha. sigh. that was almost too cute.

--

anyway id like to think i had a good weekend. a long good weekend.
and im only halfway through.

in the wise words of Duff Man : "Ooooh Yeaaah.."

out.

the google game and ong bak 2

Now. Some life lessons. Brought to you, by Ong Bak 2!!

1. Pressing hard on an elephant's head will get it to kneel for you!
2. When you get one elephant to kneel, every other elephant in the
herd wants to kneel too.
3. If savagely slashed in the calf, grab a handful of sand to rub the
pain away!
4. Beware, he who dresses as a crow, and has frequent neck spasms
5. When nation is on the verge of war, send your children to dance
academy
6. Before assuming you have killed a villain, always check for
inconspicuous armour plating.

Tune in next week, for more life lessons from
action movies I watch.

---

GOOGLE MEME! Answer the following questions.
Q: Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search.
Rishik needs to understand that all delegates may vote however
they wish

Q: Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search.
RishiK looked like a boy next door and Himesh looks like the
Incredible Bulk next door!

Q: Type in "[your name] says" in Google search.
rishik says:. Posted Over 30 Days Ago. bungee jumping is pretty
extreme

Q: Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search.
Rishik wants me to beat hci haha so dont wry mate, I will haha

Q:Type in "[your name] does" in Google search.
Rishik does not tell you is that those members also receive more services

Q: Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search.
(Wow. really cant find anything... NEXT!)

Q: Type in "[your name] asks" in Google search.
rishik asked 153 days ago: If I remove my current investment in FD with one bank say PNB at less rate of interest few years back and now wish to transfer/move it to the new investment which would fetch me more interest. So is there any penalty or reduce of 1% for premature withdrawal?

Q: Type in "[your name] likes " in Google search.
Q: Type in "[your name] eats " in Google search.
Q: Type in "[your name] wears " in Google search.
Q: Type in "[your name] was arrested for" in Google Search.
Q: Type in "[your name] loves" in Google Search

nothing for the last five!! ZIT.
hmm. well thats comforting at least. my name is still that rare.
The internet cant find me.

---

fuck it. I miss school.


because staying up late at night
and doing whatever you want to do
just isnt as fun
when you dont have a purpose
obligation
responsibility
schedule
timetable
to drive you.

the rewards always richer
when you work for it.

the weekends used to smell
sweeter than this. I remember. I think.

I WANT TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL.

dammit.