hunters and gatherers

while most three year olds have imaginary friends, my nephew has imaginary coins. he holds out his little cupped hand and says “here chelsea, i have a coin for you.” it’s sad to me that i can’t keep the movement of the coin going – you know to help the economy grow and all. people don’t take well to a 25 year old trying to give them an invisible coin though. i wonder at what point people stop thinking imaginary coins are cute and start calling you crazy?

my dog isn’t as much about helping the economy grow. he doesn’t share his wealth so much as he does bury it. anything and everything – treats, toys, dead bodies. (this last item is yet to be confirmed) when you’re an inside dog, your hiding places become a little bit limited. under a blanket, under a pillow, under the carpet after ripping it up. the other morning, meghan woke up with a chicken nugget buried deep down into her hair. it still had bbq sauce on it.

a good way to contribute to the economy is to go see a movie at your local theatre. u23d is a good option. bono is pretty much sitting on your lap. who would complain about that? i told bill i would leave him for bono. i think he was okay with that because he probably would secretly leave me for bono too. anyway, when you buy tickets for a movie and the tickets say 11:30 with no am/pm indication, don’t assume that any theatre would show a family friendly imax movie at 11:30am on a saturday morning. you’d be wrong and then you’d look like a dork as you rush into the theatre at 11:45am (we blame our tardiness on the gps. it led us astray) and hand your tickets proudly to the ticket guy and he says “you realize this is at 11:30pm, right?” yes of course we realized that. that’s why we decided to come 12 hours early to reserve our seats.


happy president’s day!

the order of things

me: i’m bored
her: me too. what should we do?
me: i have a hannah montana wig (i bought it as a gag gift. i swear) want to try it on?
her: sure. i always wondered what i’d look like blonde (with perfect crease lines throughout my hair)



me: you look like garth from wayne’s world (she did)
her: i look like a cross-dresser (also true)
me: dare you to wear it to work tomorrow
her: i’ll think about it (she didn’t)

1. some day i'll figure out how to turn this to face the right way

2. in the meantime, enjoy the change of angle. and the amazing dance..

3. oh yeah and there's no sound so use your creative liberty to add dialogue. was i really born in this generation that's supposed to be so tech savvy?

4. notice the blue shrug on meghan. she added that for hannah montana/cross dresser effect. doesn't take away from the fact that she looks like garth

does it suit me?

What's Your True Color?

My Result: Black

Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection. Not surprisingly, you tend to set challenging goals for yourself and do whatever it takes to achieve them — your strength of character is second to none. This unfaltering determination, along with your natural elegance, impresses people. But keep in mind that your personality might be intimidating to some. Try to temper your demanding side with a little softness — trust us, it won't kill you. Overall, though, black is the color of professionalism and achievement, which means it's clearly the color for you.

What are you?
http://web.tickle.com/rd/50651/color/index.jsp?testname=colorogt&resultid=G

music to my ears

so i'm not typically a fan of female vocalists, but this little ditty has somehow seeped into my heart and i don't even know how many times i've listened to it this week. it's both joyful and triumphant!

i think it's because i'm envious of how well their cake turned out despite having a boy playing xylophone in the fridge. maybe that's the key we're missing in our own baking

yay for unsigned bands!




they're called the mollies and are from salt lake city. other songs are on http://www.myspace.com/themolliesmusic

thoughts for a tuesday

- my new office lamp looks like a female leg pointing her toe and it’s kind-of freaking me out


- yesterday i went to heidi’s deli for lunch and soon realized that i was one of two girls in the entire restaurant of about 50 people (might i remind you – it’s a deli, not a gentlemen’s club). i could hardly focus on what i wanted to eat because i was laughing to myself the entire time and thinking of different taglines in my head that i could sell to heidi’s for a small chunk of cash. i wonder if it was called esteven’s deli would it be all women eating there?


- if you are deep frying homemade eggrolls, do not use a pot thinking maybe the oil will splatter less. it’s amazing how quickly an entire apartment can fill up with smoke so thick you can’t reach the smoke detector to rip the battery out


i'd really appreciate you not calling my apartment complex and letting them know we don’t have a battery in our front room smoke detector. thanks


- there were two new songs that i know of in the past year about girls named chelsea (this is big news – i’ve never known a song about a chelsea before). chelsea dagger by the fratellis and chelsea by stefy. sadly both of them are about cheaters/show girls… i’m scared for the future of the name chelsea


- i’m concerned that my female leg lamp is subliminally making me write about things like gentlemen’s clubs and show girls. i’m scared for the future of the men in my office who get this lamp on their desks

happy anniversary

one year ago today, we said our goodbyes to seattle and hightailed it outta there back to the glorious sunshine that is colorado. this means two very significant things:

1. i’ve been in colorado for a year (!)
1a. i’m not itching to leave the state anytime soon – a huge accomplishment for me

2. anniversaries should be recognized and celebrated so in recognition of our final moments in seattle, i’d like to recap what i remember from that day.

(disclaimer – i don’t remember much about my entire time in seattle. it’s what therapists call “repressing depressing memories” …bet you didn’t know therapists liked rhyming so much, did ya. (disclaimer on a disclaimer – i’ve never seen a therapist and don’t really know if this is a term they use. i did really like the cartoon dr. katz though and was sad when it was cancelled.))

leading up to the move, meghan didn’t think i was really serious about moving so she didn’t do much to aid things along. i sold all our furniture, subleased our apartment, packed our entire house (with the exception of her room, which she finally packed at 1am the night before we moved), packed the car…

so the morning of our move was an interesting one. meghan and i were both in moody moods for no particular reason. well, probably the reasons were that meghan finally realized we were really moving and i had been in seattle for four months too long. here are the highlights:

1. meghan decided she didn’t like the way the car was packed. (it was packed perfectly. thanks for helping, daniel). so she took everything out and repacked the entire car. (it wasn’t packed perfectly anymore. i couldn’t see out of any windows)

2. we had a couple of things still to do before leaving. we broke up the chores:

i took a box of unwanted stuff to the salvation army. i couldn’t see out of any of the windows. not even my side mirrors. not even when i rolled my windows down. it was by pure luck that nobody was in the lane when i shifted over. well, either luck or karma – probably since i was taking a box of stuff to donate to salvation army, good karma was on my side. yay karma!

i gave meghan the job of a final cleaning our apartment. would’ve been a fairly easy job only:

- the people who were subleasing from us showed up at the house to move stuff in. this was not planned. so they hovered over her, watching her scrub toilets and stuff.

- our new jamaican neighbor came over to see what was going on. he hovered over her to snatch up any remaining food or cleaning supplies we failed to pack.

- poor girl

3. we left a lot of things behind, but for some reason, meghan and i were both insisted on bringing along some interesting things.

- meghan wasn’t about to leave seattle without making sure every hanger we owned was in the car. and they couldn’t be clumped together in a bag or anything. no no – they had to be strategically strewn throughout the entire car. every time we opened one of the doors, hangers would be puked out.

- i wasn’t about to leave seattle without making sure every trashcan we owned was in the car. they were nice trashcans. not really, but we got a good deal on them and why would you leave behind a good deal? retrospectively i wish we would have taken the black lamp instead of the trashcans. meghan didn’t plan on taking the trashcans so she didn’t make room for them in her repack jobs. i wasn’t about to leave those puppies behind though. so, she filled them with hangers and shoved them in.

4. it’s also our mom’s birthday today. happy birthday mom! she called us last year to remind us that we didn’t call her to wish her happy birthday. we reminded her we were moving and that we were both moody, but that’s no excuse for not calling on a birthday. sorry mom.

5. i drove like the wind. i think i maybe took my hands off the wheel two times to scratch my head or something. the only words i said to meghan were part of this conversation that would happen every few hours:
“want me to drive?” “no. i’m good.”

i was on a mission. i’ve never driven with such determination in my life. i think we made the trip in nearly half the time as we probably should have.

we both breathed a huge sigh of relief as we crossed the colorado border. and then we started talking to each other again. like this:
“want me to drive?” “aw, that’s so sweet of you to offer. i’m doing just fine thanks, but let’s stop for a leisurely lunch and i’ll treat.”


it’s been sunshine and lollipops ever since. only not so much lollipops but that's just a personal choice.