Lost In Beauty-

31 December 2010

Last 2 days had been a very great fun moments. Tho is cold, tho is wet, tho is trembling but still have joy. Could say tired but nothing compare happiness to flying in sky.

Today is last day of 2010. Count down ? ...... with who i wonders ...... gan mei working, with families ....... friends ...... makes me this that i'm just a drift wood in sea right now. Each and every special day would to share with but just ...... haiz ...... Maybe i should just slept through my way into 2011, maybe woke up acting shocked that it's 2011 and i forget to celebrate it.

~the beauty exposed~

26 December 2010

Thinking about the "Sms you later", "Sorry busy now", "Msg you tml", "Confirm with you later" ...... All this never came. I start to get used to it bit by bit, everytime you said and ended up nothing but thin air. I start to realize i shouldn't cling on to the single hope that you are really occupied and would eventually message me sooner or later. What am i hoping for ? A single sorry ? This is me right now, walking away from the spot that i been waited for like eternity.

Guess i really a good actor and would definately be the next star actor cause everytime i with you, i always put up a strong front. Wearing a mask to show how happy i am even in front of her face when i hear her talking on phone, care so much about him even when it feels like knife kept slashing in my heart. Concealing tears that swell up behind my eyes, looking else where to blink away the silvery reflection of it, controlling my voice not to give hints of soreness, grip myself tighter to stop my trembling. Strong walls that building brick by brick around my heart shutting itself sealed tight so that no one will see, no one will know, no one will ever come in again. Maybe i should even put a "DO NOT TEAR DOWN!" sign. I just couldn't bare my heart to revived just to bleed to death again.

I just get used to it ...... me being alone ......

~the beauty exposed~

24 December 2010

So ... what day is it today ? Guess it ? no ? give clue ...

Clue:

Got it ? Yup , Christmas Eve !!! Actually got 3 plans, 1 go out with my TKD mates, 2 go to musical from ex-church(ya cuz i no longer there) and 3 with someone special. SOOOoooo.... so many to choose how ? can't split myself into 3 you know ...... but ya ... kinda sad la ...... every christmas is same for me, nothing special seen i always alone de ...... dun ask me why but ya; alone.

TKD mates all want rest seen training continuous for like 4 days straight ? even ironman will fail de la ...... someone special didn't want to go ...... so that's 2 down liao ...... still last one is to attend musical production. Not that i want to go seen i totally gone from there. It's like no returning road and sick of those acts inside but go because is invited by pris aka fishball, one that really like big sister to me. She like only one not acting or do things for sake of some stupid objectives (that why you know why people does dislike Christians, somehow like sales promoter). People go in also got objectives, some want friends, some for chio girls, some for hunks ... who cares, definitely not kind for me.

So you ask me how i going to pass my christmas ?

Prolly walk on some streets alone

~the beauty exposed~

23 December 2010

Didn't got out today with wanyi again ... ai yoyo ... wanted to go NEX but she scare i not reach my training in time so cancel it and shop herself for presents. So afternoon i just have a long long nap seen no one chio me out. Haha near 4 i woke up by vibration of my phone .... RUYAN ! not scolding la ... just lucky u sms or i sure sleep until shiok, =night time.

Yup training moved to today cause tml is christmas eve ... teehee so good right ... hmmm what else le ... half way through training stop liao cause back cannot take it ...... walao !!! expected to recover in half year time ... siao longer then that time i injure my instep that took like 1month+ ? wonder how my tournament going to go ......

FASTER HEAL ~!~!

~the beauty exposed~

22 December 2010

人往往都是现实的。。。看到立意半没好学位（有好成绩与有个屁），没有兼职的工作，有再多的时间陪她也没有用。居多和你一两天就离你而去，只应为她要人疼和关怀的感觉。。。。。。

一侧都是短暂的，熊熊要记得不要太认真，不要靠近每个人。即使靠近了了也千万不可喜欢。把心好好的放在保险箱里，把钥匙仍进海里。

~the beauty exposed~

21 December 2010

Count down of 1 month to another match ...... this time i really dunno what to do. See the encouragement from ... just make whole of me heavy. Will i get headshot this time ? Will i be able to think clearly ? Will i ignore everything and just be a player in the ring ?

Why do i have to get selected ...... while my friends are out ...... i'm not that strong as i look ... Why ... WHY .... WHY !!! Whats my motivation this time ?

~the beauty exposed~

Think it's already time i long get use to it ...... people come and go, say and forget.

You guys know why i don't always get close to people guys or girls ...... betray by your buddies, infatuation with girls if get close too much. Yup, buddies who you think can have fun, sorrow and secret with end up one saying them out creating those sorrow behind your back. Girl who got too close cause i just been ...... too good i guess, always try to control myself to keep distance from all. Once this person,S ,told me Virgo person(which is me are like that, how could i say wrong =( ;

Virgo :

People look up to Virgo for friends because they are straight thinkers and solve problems logically. They are truthful, loyal and determined. Some people might find them cold or emotionally detached because they live in their minds, not in their emotions and feelings. It might be hard to pin down how a Virgo friend is feeling because they easily live in denial. A person who is able to read deep into another person will notice when Virgo is not well but if they confront them about it, they would rather retreat then talk about it. It is best to keep your emotional distance from a Virgo friend unless they open up to you first. Virgo might try to analyze and control a friend's life but only with the idea that they will improve their life, not purely for the sake of controlling.

However, what can i do here ? Hurt inside cause day i been waiting for counting for. For what i remind myself. P once promises will be there to watch my on-coming taekwando sparring match but well ...... guess she forgets it. The sweet promises that's been said just like expired honey, actually taste bitterish yuck. Why do i remembers ALL things we do together, ALL words we said, ALL promises made, ALL just came back to nothing.

Ya just had selection matches yesterday. All those thinking and training, wasted ? My mind didn't pull out those move i though of, my reflexes didn't work at all(what the hell my mind was in). Just like some low belt, totally not up to standard. Sir told me this that my performance is just average(ok for a club, young lion level). Is that really average ? It like almost not even a club. I don't know what i been thinking. Somehow ...... somehow ...... i manage to snap out of it in time i guess. Twice blows swept through my defense and pass right in front of my face, feeling the nails scratched my chin when i pull back. What am i thinking about now ? You going to be a dumbie and get yourself killed(ya my opp. was pikachu, he was dam serious and can't control himself once he in match) ? Was thinking that i can't be knock down ...... not here, not now. My last simple promises to someone; "Take care of yourself xiongxiong".

Everything lives on reasons, to walk, to hide, to study, even least to live. Reasons keep one alive, reasons keep one going strong. Without reasons, everything will deem pointless.

There's where i reverse the positions and turn the table. Trapping and attacking pikachu in corner repeatedly. Sorry pikachu ...... i had to live to fulfill my side of promise (least ...... that's what didn't do what i hate to do, LIE)

Ya i been acting a happy joyful person, one that even give councilling, to people ...... least that's what i want people to though. Tears start to drop when i writing this ...... dunno for what but ya ( ha ... stupid bear try make singapore flood again ) ...... All this history taught me to be one person. A lonely person that can only depends on his shadow. That's how he, Lee Wei Xiong, or should i say xiongxiong goes through everything.

~the beauty exposed~

19 December 2010

Ya ya ... haha i better update bit ba ... someone want to know how i been liao le.

Well sum up everything in short ba (ya when i say short is like few words only la). Joking ... haha (i know not funny =P )

Finally had nice nice outing with my gan mei. Ya you la dun see else where liao, the one want me update de. Picture speak more then thousand words so here it is.

1)

Guess where is this =P (Place: Cathay)

Me & my gan mei

Eating ice-cream

Her feeding her invisible friend

Lol ! Eat ice-cream also want see hunk

First time eating so gracefully

Seen she treat me yummy yummy ice-cream, i treat her to watch Rapunzel 3D. Cinema cannot have flash so cannot take ... haha ... plus we already late bit liao so =) But i would rate that movie 9/10 stars + best movie award of the year (eventho it have simple storyline, they film it in way of comedy,especially the character's character but not sidetracked). After that we walked around SP, just nice they have this show, kinda remind me of what i am when i small XD

Elmo and friends

Her watching inattentively

Me snap snap

Mirror, mirror in the ball~~~

Small Christmas tree in purple

Lovely hearts in christmas

Sesame Street ~!~!~!

2)Prawning Time !

Huh? Really ?

First time try ... scare scare

Yi ting really scare liao

Just joking ... the prawn bite and ran

The boss

Prawn is cute

Teacher

3) Finally which just happened 2 days ago *Drum roll* *Drum roll again* Wei Xiong's sister(this part joking de) Wei Xin Birthday !

2200 - Got there bit later cause everyone was having training so .... haha. Sirs all over there liao and and and that fangfang ar got there earlier then me le -.-"' humph ~!

0100 - Wow ...... we still chat chat around. Got to know weixin's BFF named Joyce (nice name, joy in latin if correct). We did play scissor paper stone with beat hand de(weird is that joyce didn't feel pain even her hand got blueblack ... waaaa ... sorry didn't mean it)

~200 - Fang, earthworm and stanley go home early. So only weixin, kevin, joyce and me left. 4 person Chatting around. Not forget we drink some mixer >.< should have though bring some Vodka or Tequil ... least want try mix with joyce's lime mixer(hope there is nice taste =P )

Dunno what time - Joyce accompany me go buy tibits at cheers but we end up sitting at the fitness corner and chat chat about everything. Kinda of fun this few hours. Especially when she try climb to top of monkey bars to sit.... haha ... like cat cannot come down. We had great laughs and enjoy time talking. Oh woops ! It's going morning liao le ...... that time fly so fast already 6 in morning. So we 2 go back room seeing both of them already slept so soundly. Having great idea, we both of watch sunrise at the park. Having to play at the maze ... haha ... ya i remember the "shortcut" she trys to take when running from me. Well people say this time at this kind of place is for couples. *Blush* haha think we do look like one here now. We both sit there waiting for sun to show itself. This few hours is really fun enjoying moments. This feeling is like ... dunno how to say and dun wish to say even tho this my blog but is long time i never had. Just for few hour dunno can happen so much ...... just hope izzn't too soon again.

~the beauty exposed~

04 December 2010

Haiz ...... ya haiz is all i can say in front right now. A lonely guy in a lonely house doing lonely thing. Who else could win this lonely guy.

Just wondering, wondering, if one day i was to leave this place quietly, no letter, no call, no goodbyes, who will notice it first? Will it be the one who once said dun want see me go? my gan sisters ? my normal friends ? tkd friends ? stranger ? or my enemies ?

*If sighing would minus 1 year of my life each, i wonder how good will it be.

~the beauty exposed~