Moving On ...

Sometimes, you just need to get some things off your chest ...

Decisions ... sometimes they are easy to make but, sometimes, wow, they are so hard! My decision to stop having kids was one of the hardest things I had to do. For those who are close to me, making that decision may have appeared to sound "easy", but it was not at all. 

We were planning to get pregnant in 2009. So, by now, we would've had four children. Well, life is not always how we plan. Wes got really sick and I actually thought, for a long time, that we were not going to have more kids. I was OK with that. The thing is, Heavenly Father wasn't. Even after I got rid of pretty much everything baby I had, I could not get that "peace" that we were done. I remember seeing pregnant girls or finding out someone was pregnant and I remember feeling "jealous" in one way. 

The time came when Wes and I decided that we really wanted another one so I went ahead and got my IUD out. I got pregnant the first month we tried. It's weird but, at that time, I knew we were done. 

I heard once that you will never regret having more kids, but you may regret not having more. Well, I KNOW that Heavenly Father is happy with our decision to stop here. He knows the desires of our heart and I can feel He is happy with our decision. Still ... it was the hardest decision EVER! 

I look at Mason and see how adorable he is. The little things he does that just m.e.l.t.s. my heart and it makes me so sad that I won't experience that again. It makes me want to cry. However, one day, it has to stop. So, no matter if you have 1, 3 or 6 kids, one day that door will need to close and it's very emotional to turn that key and lock it.  

I feel my family is complete and, oh, how nice it is to have this feeling. I am happy! It's still hard for me to close that door though. I love kids and I love raising them. But I also had my first when I was 30 years old. Believe it or not, that makes a big difference when deciding to have kids close to 40. 

Today, I see pregnant girls and I think "I am glad I am not getting pregnant again". I am so happy for them but the desire is not there for me anymore. I've said it many times - It's time to stop making and start raising :) 

I am so thankful to Heavenly Father for giving me 3 wonderful children. They are my life and I can't imagine going through this life without experiencing motherhood. I am, by far, a better person because of them. 

As for now ... I am moving on ...

What an unexpected surprise!

This happened about a week ago and it brought tears to my eyes ...  

I usually make sure Spencer and Isabella clean their room before bed. About a week ago, we were getting them to bed and their room was a huge mess. I didn't have it in me to get them to clean it. I was so tired. So I just told them that they didn't need to clean their room until the next day. 

They both get a bout 5-10 minutes to read on their own before bed. I say goodnight and they, on their own, turn the light off, once the timer goes off. So, it wasn't until about 11:00PM, when I checked them before I went to bed that I noticed ... their room was SPOTLESS!! They decided, without me asking, to clean their room! What a good example of being responsible. (Of course it doesn't happen often, however, I think it's good to recognize when it does happen :)

I remember getting teared eyed and, that night, in my prayer, I could not ask my Heavenly Father for anything, but just thank Him for my family and everything else I am so blessed with.

Spencer and Isabella THANK YOU!

 Mom and Dad loves you soooo much!

OOOPS!

Just one of those moments (0:48) ... hahaha

One step at a time

That's my almost 9 months old baby ..  crazyyyy!!

Sleeping ...

These pictures and the video were taken about a month and a half ago. 

1. I was doing my things and when I checked on Mason he was in dream land ...

2. When we went to bed, Isabella was sleeping in her bed and Spencer had PJ's on. When I checked the kids in the morning, this is what I found ... 

3. A couple of days later, I was feeding Mason and suddenly he started to fall asleep ... haha



I just thought it was so funny! Cute boy ... cute kids! 

My Preschooler!

Isabella started preschool today! It's weird to think she'll be in kindergarten next year!! Even more weird than that, is not having her and Spencer here for a while. I guess Mason is going to get a lot of attention and mom is going to get a lot done too! haha                       (at least that's the plan!)

Let's say my little girl was pretty excited about her first day of school ... she's so fun!

Yesterday they had an open house so the kids could meet the teachers and friends. She already knew the teachers and she's really excited to be the "big girl" this year.

Isabella, you are such a good, sweet, loving girl. I'm so proud of you! We wish you a great school year! Love you!!!!