ARGH!! Fking projects stressed me up like f***!!! So much to do man! Stupid tourism, but luckily i managed to complete some of the parts for the proposal... Erm... nth much to update though, its just projects all the way... After that, at least we will be able to rest a while...

Recently, ive found that iam quite a changed person... With all the vulgar languages come spitting out of my mouth like nobody's business and so much more negative improvements! Since 2008 is here, i seriously hope that i stop saying so much vulgar words and stop my bullshit... But i know all these are hard to quit when u got such friends with u all the time.. Isn't it right? LOL...

Hmmm... i dunnno if its me or that ive been rather positive lately that i dun seem to be in any sad mood or what... Even with the stresss accumulating like nobody's business, i still feel very positive...

Anyways, its getting late, meeting my group tomolo... projects agãin~ yeah.... i know, u guys are complaining and feeling tired already.. so am i... but its all for the sake of getting good results! Dun u all think so... ciao...

I dunno how i managed to pass time without u...
But it seems that ive gotten myself into a routine.
A routine which does not consist of you...
And now that your coming back,
i'd probably be thrown back to square one...
It took so much effort for me to at least not think of you as often...
In the end, i still let my heart do the thinking...
35 more days...

Its christmas! Merry xmas to all my friends and family and relatives! Just got back.. Reached spore from KL at bout 7 smth... Went to my aunty's christmas party and head back home.. Last fri till now was tonnes of fun fun and more fun! A christmas most well spent i would said... Overall, my best xmas experience!

Shall post some of the photos someday... Tried tonnes of things which i dare not try last time too... Oh, if u guys go to malaysia, try going to yong peng... There are lots of good food there, esp. the "hei mian"... hehe... damn tired now... gonna zzz.. ciao..

37 more days!

Just finished 90% of the games in genting theme park... From roller coaster to viking ship to the sucide machine to the flying coaster! Super uper fun esp. with my cousins around... Saw smth "dirty" at night... my first encounter with the supernatural... super scary... dunno if its halluncination or what... Now in KL staying at first hotel... at a cyber cafe in the largest shopping mall in KL... Thats bout it...

Its christmas eve! And tomolo is christmas... finally... After that its the gruesome projects... ARGH work work work!!! I dun wanna come back so soon... Esp. with all my cuzzies around... hahaz.. going back to the hotel already... ciao..

my mind is all bout u...

Currently a crazy fan of Han Ga In who acted in witch yoo hee! You guys should watch... a very sweet drama.. Ands currently re watching Full House, starring song hye kyo and rain... Think iam going crazy over these dramas and wondering when i can experience such love... think iam dreaming too much...iam still young afterall...

Anyway, been rather in a cranky mood lately... stupid weekends! Sian, shall not elaborate... And finally my uncle is planning yet another genting outing with one big groupof us!!! IF everything i set, might be going this fri, but that is depending on the room vacancy! Really hope to go... it will definitely be fun with all my cuzzies along...

And... my sis will finally be back on this wed.. more krispy cremes for me man! i wonder when i have gotten addicted to donuts... hmm, nth much to update already, oh.. i watched warlords starring lee lian jie, andy lau and takeshi... Not a bad show, quite nice.. it depicts a mixture of how good pple get bad while trying to attain peace and getting the perception of what is right and wrong admist of the constant war and taking over of territories in order to gain the so called peace... In the end, of course, all 3 of them were being made used of and turned on each other... Its rather complex, youve got to watch it to understand what the director is trying to say.. haha.

ehh... nth much to update already... tomolo going back to sch for proj, so gonna head off to bed now... nights...

My life may be filled with laughter and friends
But somewhere and somehow
I feel so empty without u
Even admist of laughter, i thought of you...

Exams are finally over! CTs i meant... No more studying till 2-3am... Been playing too much during studying of my CTs, but i compensated it by studying late... hehe, hope it helps. So far, the papers are alright, abit of hiccups here and there, but overall should be ok, i HOPE.

Had a pre examinations celebrations with my dudes and dudettes (female dudes)... Though the places we went are not very fun, like we went to the LAN center to waste time... lolz... but its the company which matters.. :) AFter that marcus and sheela left, GL came and we walked around the mall... Brenda u better thank us for waiting with ur BF... lolz.. Jkjk..

Bought meiji and played Ji Koh Pa... And went home.. And got a bit of stomach upset... probably the milk... with strawberry and vanila meiji mixed, gives u a big time lao sai...

Eh.... now at my grandma house, playing with the baby...

And iam gonna officially declare that THE MAPLE GANG IS BACK! i hope... lolz.., cox i personally feel maple is only fun for half an hour only...

ANd tomolo still have to go back jb again... this time hope we can stay longer... Ciao...
And good luck to us, cox we got 6-7 projects left untouched...

Your happy, and thats all it matters
Nth else...

IES buang~... And status of DCI? At lect 3... can die already... Bloody exams.

Somehow my mood is affected even if your not here...
Just dun feel like studying anymore... :(

Somehow part of me is gone....

no mood to study at all~~...
i wonder why...

iam f**ked like totally...

Pls let time fast forward...

Today's IS was per usual... Nth much.. went to marcus's house to see the kitten... Very cute but NOISY.... haha.. Went for dinner and head on home... And later its MARCUS TAN WEN JIAN'S Birthday... hehe, shall make a post here and wish u a very happy bdae and enjoy ur day...


The familiar place
the familiar ride
the familiar surroundings
but not the familiar person...

Another boring sunday...

Sundays used to be fun
But not, without u now...
Boring sundays shall continue to haunt me...
But not after 2 months later!

The wait in glee...

Finally the strainous project weeks are coming to a stop.... TEMPORARY. Nonetheless, its still a break for us. Though there is still 1 or 2 reports to do... Been feeling VERY tired. All the presentations and stuff to do, plus the tonnes of revision not yet left to do... think my GPA 4 buang liao.

Anyway, school's been great... Ok, not so, with those couples around... lol. kindda makes me jealous... But kindda happy for them at the same time la, so loving... hmmm... nth much to update, but finally on sat iam going in to jb for my grandparents 50 yrs anni.. haha... diamond anni..

Today, smth damn infuriating happpened. And boy, that guy was unlucky to be discovered by us... Anyway, to the innocent person involved in this saga, u know the whole class is behind u... And to those 3 assholes, pls stop coming with this excuses of "i got high fever" or "my family has problem" shit. We dunno whats ur purpose in coming up with these stupid excuses. But definitely ur pulling down ur team mate and if ur reading this, pls... come up with better excuses...

2 more months! =>

i hereby wanna thank gl and les for getting me addicted to cs that iam still not aslp at this hour. and i left my tt and project untouched the whole weekend. thanks and regards... PS: Be ready for my headshot!

i still have not forgotten what it feels like with you around
still have not forgotten the outings we've had
still have not forgotten the tingling sensation you brought to me
still have not forgotten the words u said
still not have not forgotten the smile
still have not forgotten the jokes youve made...

been feeling lousy.. bad tempered... being such a jackass to my friends.. very sorry... couple of things hapen, dun wish to tok bout it. but i really hope that everything will turn out fine... just din wanna lose this friendship.. projects are piling up everyday... every week also got stuff to do.. and as each report and presentation were completed, i began to feel more and more dejected... maybe iam leading my team to doom. and i always think SO MUCH...

really need to score on projects etc cox to me, i really need those marks... to get into a local uni. its a do or fail kindda thing. i dun wish to get just a diploma... i wanna accomplish much in life. but iam just not doing anything much now. Amnyway, thanks to my friends, really... without ur suppport i could have died. and to my group, thanks for understanding.. dunno why iam being so ke qi.. but just felt like thanking u guys..

and on with the damn projects and down with those damn presentations....!

a less coloured life without u...

To all my friends who have made this a wonderful day.. Thanks alot, had a really enjoyable bdae. Esp. the cake, the wishes on blog and through smses and the loud bdae cheers. Not forgetting my parents and sis for their early bdae wish and the wonderful dinner and cake.. thanks to al for making this day a woderful one...

The post which meant so much to me... :)

i dunno if its me or what.. Iam just feling fuking pissed at everything.. projects, life, school, friends, EVERYTHING.. Its fuking tiring to have presentations and reports to rush every week... it feels fuking irritating to complete work just before deadline. Iam not a gan chiong spder but rather u guys are relax spider.. lOl... what a term.. iam going craaaaaazzzzzzyyyyyyy...
It feels fuking irritating when bfs stick with gfs ALL THE TIME... and i mean it.. joking? nope... i seriously feel irritate now... but what can i do right? Me feeeling jealous? or me feeling that my friends are gone one by one becox of their relationship!
And everyone just wants a piece of me... its like everyone is using me as a fustrating bin.. they shout, they attitude, they bitch and they fuking disrespect me... ARGh just fuk it.. i think iam crazy and angry at the same time...
I need a life.. i need night lifes... yea.... thats right.. i need girls... LOL.. crazy me.. ciao..

damn shagged! just finished 50% editing of the korea trip report! FUK man, everyweek, there are presentation and reports, then when can we start on designing and programming of the website? sianzzzz... One thing iam glad is that my class is real fun! Ok, except for one medicure bast@rd... we all know la, hor? hehez...





This is the first time iam being driven to extreme exhaustion, but somehow somewhere in my heart,, iam kindda enjoying it... maybe iam crazy..

The girl of my dream! Fuk to those pple who says she's ugly like hell, i know the right side one is... Her personality is like the best.. Only pple who interact with her knows it! dun u guys deny it? hee... ciao...

Projects are just driving me and my group crazy.. Sorry for being cranky all the time, cox iam always in stress and i seriously want good for my team... my grp, Pls love me kkzz.. forgive me... lolz.. *pukes*

Its not fair for me to think of u always...
So many questions popped up my head every single day
How are u?
How have u been doing?
Can u withstand the cold?
but i jus could not being myself to ask u...
3 and a half more mths...
i really miss u suddenly...
In the mean time, projects will be the only thing to keep u out of my head,
temporary....

Finally back from korea last saturday... Enjoyed myself quite a bit.. (perhaps 60% fun, 40% sianess) Seoul, is a very nice place with different culture, its like a culture bang when u go there. YOu see old palace with modern buildings surrounding it. The company visits really amaze me... And saw a girl of every guy's dream man! Too bad i din take a photo with the SK girl... :(

Been VERY busy with projects, haven had a good sleep though, eversince i came back.. Anyway, think iam going bonkers ever since iam back from korea, how true.,... To my friends pls bear with me for a whie, cox i will be back to normal soon! I guess... Anyway, iam very lucky to have them in school to hang out with, if not, i will be seriously bored. And for projects, thanks for bearing with me... i know iam unbearably gan chiong, but its for the good of the group... must get AD! hehe.. i shall upload trhe photos taken in korea next time then.. ciao.

-----> Its been long, but nothing can ever replace u... nothing. <-----

Going off to korea in 3 days time! somehow, iam not very excited...

4 smses, 3 days of waiting, 0 reply... devastated.

Iam feeling real terrible now, not physically but just mentally. I feel like there are so much things left untouched and so much i can do and yet i did not. Somany things to improve on and yet i did not do it. The competition is tight man, ever since the first presenttion.. Kindda felt that we could have donemuch better, whats with the W11!!!? Even iam addicted to it.. I really hope that we can compleet everything on time and do it well.. i really need to score for this sem man! ciao.....

Went to les house for project, or shall i say more of a winning 11 session.... hehe... Din make much progress with the coding but hey, at least we got a plan... Keep ur chins up ya! We will do it as a group...

Watched lots of"shows today, inclusive of prison break 3 and the plot was seriously disappointing, whats up with al; the conspiracy shit in panama? And all the fight scenes and with scotfield getting tangle up again in the prison having to "make use" of pple to get what he wants... Seriously iam tired with all The Company's consiracy already...

Its gonna be another busy week, so.... i better get some rest.. ciao...

Get me my life back
cox now its all bout u!

a nice morning slacking around etc, after a very busy week... a couple of issues happened, shall not elaborate... afterall everything's coming to an end finally after this sem... My darling cousin is coming, she should be about 6-7 mths old already, anyway my sis took their car so they could nto fetch the baby over to our house and guess what my dad and mum do?! They say they wanna take mrt there!! I was like.... Cox from what i know my dad hates mrt to the core and more ever they live around serrangoon there... hahaz...

Anyway, back to my work... hopefully we can get AD for our project!

Sometimes i wonder is it just me or that iam being taken for granted or is it that iam being too coward to voice out my unhappiness...

I feel empty inside...
hw i wish u were here
to fill up my everyday...

But its because of this that i realize that there are nobody quite like you
as perfect as you are
as understanding as you are
3 and half mths more!
I will be waiting...

ARGH! Everything and everyday is just not running smooth for me! from my leg pain (FYI, its back again!) to work... From projects to PBL! And stupid overseas trip made me feel so halfhearted which affect my mood...! I dun even know wth is going on during lecs! even collect pda can ganna the spoilt one! WTH is wrong with me!? &*^$&*^#^(*&#^(*^$(^$(^$^$(^*(*&%$#$%^&!!! Sorry to those who got affected by my mood...


End of rant, back to work.....

It sucks to not have your clique going to an overseas trip with u and missing out tonnes of fun and probably foreseeing yourself getting stuck in hotel playing masak masak on ur own...
It sucks to not get a subsidy not even 100 bucks...
It sucks to not have a room mate whom your close with, in the first place those who are close with me did not go...
It sucks to not go visit samsung!
It sucks overall... but i still wanna go... Maybe i should explore the place on my own... and enjoy the cold breeze...
Comtemplating again...

Iam running away, iam leaving this place... to a faraway place where thoughts of you can't reach me...

Joined my dad's compay Sports Recreation Day! Wanted to just follow my dad and not join the competition, end up got one team do not have enough members so i was forced to join their team. Ran here and there and played many fun games.. Got to know many pple also... Shall post the pics up someday.. After that dinner near labrador park, sat there for nearly 2 hours listening to them toking... Sian... after that went home and watch my fav. korean family show now showing on channel u! A very good show, recommended!

And finally naruto is out after MIAing for 1 week!! And its not even a double episode! Damn it! Ok la, gonna slp soon, got to go malaysia later! Finally can see my cousins already!! ciao...

It sucks without u here.... Seriously.

Somehow i feel lethargic every single day...
Be it mentally or physically...
It seems that iam running away from something...
Be it a thought or an emotion or even the tiresome waiting of a physical self to appear...
Its so tiring for me...
It seems that i can find no place in my mind which doesn't have a shadow of existence of you...

I was on the bus today and somehow i was reminded of you again... Once again i broke your promise to not think of you... iam sorry.

Today's dinner at imperial herbal at vivo was great! Ex but overall the food was top grade... Too bad i din bring along the camera... The baby's throwing tantrum again, kept crying in the restaurant etc, and i guess instead of celebrating my dad's borthday, everyone were instead busy trying to pacify the baby... lol..

Walked around and bought many stuff from giant and head on home... Reached home and watched taxi... One of my fav all time movie, its ncie esp. with gisele bundchen around... It makes the movie smoking hot!

Anyway, school's starting later on, have to reach there by 8am.. wonder if i can do it...iam not very nervous bout school starting but instead iam more nervous about me cutting hair with cus... Will i look wierd? Will pple think iam tyring hard to look good? I know i dun look good AT ALL, but its the inner self of me who wants or rather needs to at least try to look good... Really hope they dun cut a schoolish hairstyle for me, cox ive been having this hairstyle for the past few yrs! Pls...., i need a hairstyle that looks good and likeable by everyone... Somehow iam just feeling nervous, its worse than having to cut my hair for the first time... I know iam being paranoid for nth again... hahaz... its getting late... ciao...

The same place
which brings back memories...
I suddenly have the urge to go to the places we have been before...

Maybe iam already crazy and i din even know it...
Its probably the double life that iam leading which leads to this craziness...
I may smile, i may be crazy, i may act like i dun give a damn...
But ultimately, happiness potrayed is not happiness from within..
As iam always showing the opposite of what iam feeling in front of others...

Maybe i should stop this "gathering" thing... Its just not for me if every gathering turns out like some awkward screnario which i myself can't explain.. I apologise...

To all tt04-ians!! Les and I hope to have a meet up before school starts since we will be busy with school stuff and attachment... Can we pls meet on sat for a simple dinner at Tanjong pagar that "zi cha" store for dinner and probably some other activities after that... Fri cannot cox jun wei and marcus they all end work at 830...

So i suppose sat we all should be free...!! No excuses ah!! Pls try to squeeze out some time... Reply at my tagboard or sms me to confirm... Time will be confirmed once i know how many pple are going... Thanks... REPLY BY FRI!!!! IF NOT I SMACK U AH!

I may be stuck at the crossroad now...
But someday, when i find a map,
A map without your directions,
I will walk out my own way soon....

Today's another family gathering at bedok... The baby's throwing tantrum again... And my auntie quarrled with grandma over the baking of banana cake... -.-"
But overall, it tasted good, i contributed a bit too...

After that, went home, and here i am blogging... Kindda tired... And tomolo's monday, which will be another chaotic day, with pple swarming in with tonnes of questions, which consist of a few retarded and stupid rheotorical questions. Last week, got one secretary called,

Secretary: hi, is this the IT helpdesk?
Me: Yap, is there anything i can help you with?
Secretary, Oh yeah, can u come up now to help me put the adpater into the bag?
Me: Its actually quite easy, u just have to pull out the plug and put it in the bag...
Secretary: But i am not too sure with the wirings and all, can u just send someone up?
Me: *what the fuck*

so... i went up and help her put the adapter and go back down again... see, even educated pple are stupid... I seriously cannot believe it, at how dumb they are...

Anyway, its kelvin's birthday today! Hope your skin tone will darken a bit and grow taller and stop bitching with me always... hehe... Anyway, hope ya enjoy ur day.

Tomolo's gona be a helluva hectic day... ciao!

The photos, the memories and past messages are what kept me going... 4 gruesome mths to go...

OT for u and u still not happy. I handle many of the things myself and u still say why i do things so slow? wTF u want?! ARGH PISSED!

Work's pilling these few days since its the starting of a new mth, and many new joiners need their com. And there's no one who can help me at all! The amount is killing me... But luck for the OTs for the past few days, if not i would died amount that stack of new coms....

Seriously.. iam not in the moood to update, so....... ciao...

Tired session yesterday... Met up with kok and kel for swimming... After 2 laps only, my arm ache like hell, but lucky still manage to swim a decent amount of rounds, though i nv count though. MEt up with kai lun for bball... Lolz,he looks wierd without hair! But soon it will be my turn la.. =X

Anyway, went to my grandma house today, relatives from malaysia also joined us. Had dinner, played with the baby and went home.

I really dread going to office tomorrow... Argh! Iam stil not very familarize with work, and both of my colleagues left. And iam suppose to do cloning of coms too!!! What a mess ive landed myself in.. Anyway, i dun even wanna think bout it, shall "shun qi zi ran" ba.

I really hope that the situation in Myanmar wil improve, i blogged something bout the issue, but... decided to delete the entry... u guys would probably know why.. anyway, tomolo's gonna be a tiring day, shall zzz.... Night...

1 mth down... 4 to go...
it feels like yesterday when we met up...

Today, was last working day for gabriel, jonathan and Boon kwong. And iam left with all the major mess, since gabriel and jonathan is leaving, i will be alone at the helpdesk.... =(


Anyway, next mon there will be a new person coming in, hope he/she will be of great help, if not iam dead. And boon kwong left, and iam in charge of cloning coms (its just liek reformatting com) and i will be running both side. ARGH! But lucky iam only left with 2 weeks of work... So the poor new comer has to take over everything fast...





Anyway, farewel was at china square there. It was a simple lunch at pizza hat. Had fun there, with all the p**n talk with samuel. Lolz... And after work, the whole IT department had a brief chat with those pple leaving and we took photos here and there...





Thanks to jonathan and gabriel, for teaching me alot of stuff and keep answering my queries etc... And good luck for jon's army and gab's attachment... Lastly, thanks for leaving this pile of shit for me... lolz..=X

The 3 guys who are leaving, from left to right (jonathan, boon kwong and gabriel)

Same pple with addition of another jonathan, our lao jiao and frontline helpdesk person.

Finally, our one big IT family.

Front: jonathan, boon kwong, christy, gabriel and chris

Back: see heng, (erm.. i forgot this guy's name.. lolz..), me and jonathan.

anyway, i gtg watch naruto, survivor and so many other shows.. Hope next mon i can survive since i can barely breathe even when both of them are around. I wonder what will happen next week when both of them are not around! ciao...

Work for the past few days is busy busy busy! Many stuff to complete and more coms to settle. Anyway, tml samuel and gabriel are leaving.. I will definitely be very sad. Cox no one helps me in the helpdesk... hahaz. Anyway, i will be missing out lots of fun and laughter, not forgetting the street fighter game samuel shared with us when he is around... and of course all the bad things he taught us. Not forgetting gabriel... Though i dun have much good impression on him, but he is alright afterall. I wil definitely miss seeing him guai lan with the pple at helpdesk...

Lunch wasn't so lonely for some days, since i got to know most of my colleagues well. And pool with the pple in other department is fun also... And i Must thank auntie christy for stuffing so many moon cake and all the cakes etc to us... haha...

I guess i have nth much to update already, cox its work work and work... Argh! And i have one thing to complain... Some users are just not appreciative of their coms, saying they spill water into the com like its none of their business... Fking attitude... And all they want is just to see if their hardisk data can be taken out or not... Ass... Pls la, appreciate the com la, u guys are holding a laptop which is nto even urs in the first place.. And we did not even charge u in the first place!!! Enough of rants, its useless and futile and adds on to my psycological unbalance... lolz.. i sound so serious...

Hmmm.... Anyway, i'd better slp. cox for the past few days, i have not been feeling too well.. ciao.

I went to that place
Where it holds so much memories...
Where it reminds me of u...
It felt kindda nostalgic...

The F**king feeling is back...
To taunt me again for days and nights...
But I chose to live in repression
And not wanting to think bout it..
But no matter what i do.
Its just plain useless...
Tell me what u want me to do,
to get ur love...
Do i have to slit my wrist to get ur love?

For now, all iam hoping is that ur well and safe... Thats all iam hoping... 31/8/07

Iownder, if ANY of my friends are actually single??? cox its like they have their own bfs/gfs that they dun have time to spare, esp. my bball buddies... Buddy 1: eh sorry have to spend time with my darling... Buddy 2: sorry ah, my darling will scream if i choose to go out with u... And the rest of them went to ARMY!!! As for my class guys, no need mention la, all got gfs.. All except a few? But we are overly united, if one nv go, the rest all dun wanna go out already.. In whatever way, iam jealous.. lolz... Cox all of their gfs/bfs snatched my buddies one by one! But what can i do right? Which is why iam glad that i have my family to count on, to go out with....

Anyway, iam watching constantine now... And I got a feeling that i might wake up late tml... ciao.

Gosh... My weekends feel so boring without u!

A temporary departure
marks a souls's eternal sorrow....

Dad: One day, 2 robber went to rob a bank. But instead of finding money, all they find are containers of yogurts. Why is that the bank have full of yogurt instead of money?

Me: dunno, maybe the bank staff love eating yogurt...

Dad: no because its a sperm bank!

Me: -_________-"

Mom: *smacks dad*

Nonetheless its still funny la... Keep it up! I just love working days where u have so much free time on hand.. lolz. ciao!

kElviN says:
thomas says (8:53 AM):
they all couple there and here liao

thomas says (8:53 AM):
no time for singles like us

kElviN says:
dont need ask me liao

thomas says:
lolz

thomas says:
then i and u la

thomas says:
we play daytonna

kElviN says:
dont want lah. you weak one. LOL

This is what u get for trying to be good.... Pple pls ignore him. thanks block him from msn if possible...

It was a bad day yesterday. Had to see a doc and took injection yesterday cox i got a sudden breakout of itchy rashes all over my body... My parents brought me down to the doctor and after the jab, my rashes were gone INSTANTANEOUSLY... But that comes with a whopping fee of 63 bucks... Wonder if i can claim it from the company...

Anyway, work's been ultra hectic... Tonnes and tonnes of pple coming to the helpdesk today... Managed to cope and i heard that after gabriel is leaving, i wil be the only one left, and there will not be anyone there to help me once he is gone... ARGH! Jia lat liao... I wonder if i can actually manage since i only know how to troubleshoot a couple of problems!

On a side note, results are out, all of us did well... I suppose no one got even a B for their IAP... lolz...

Erm.. I don't really have much things to blog about, so... i shall end here! Actually iam just being lazy... haha.. ciao.


I landed on the earth,
like droplets of rain...
Stuck on the ground,
just like a puddle of water,
waiting to rise up to the sky again...
Just then, you poured me with heat,
And here i am, rejoining you with glee...
Just as i was enjoying,
I was brought back down by your dark clouds...

And now,
Here i am on the ground,
waiting for resurrection...
And waiting for that gleam of the slightest glare from you...
I hope i don't wait in vain...

If a picture paints a thousand words
Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show
The you I've come to know
If a face could launch a thousand ships
Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you
You're all that's left me to
And when my love for life is running dry
You come and pour yourself on me
If a man could be two places at one time
I'd be with you
Tomorrow and today
Beside you all the way
If the world should stop revolving
Spinning slowly down to die
I'd spend the end with you
And when the world was through
Then one by one the stars would all go out
Then you and I would simply fly away...

I just wanna fly away with you...
To somewhere in seclusion
A world with stars, moon, sea, beach and everything else beautiful...

This feeling of lost, signless, no directions ahead, its been long since ive felt them. Iam beggining to think bout where i wanna go, how am i gonna further my education. But all this have to be only done after my NS though. Perhaps iam thinking too much ahead, but iam a person with big plans but no effort done. To own my own corporation, to gain expereince in every field of job, to earn big bucks, but i don't have the extreme determination to do it. Now here i am dreaming bout all these. I have been calculating my gpa tonnnes of times and it seems that it falls short of entering a university... Now iam really starting to worry... :(

ahhhh..... fuck it!

Whoa~!! A very hectic day today, but overall still manageable... Hope i quickly can get used to helping at helpdesk, cox Gabriel is leaving soon and i will be left in the helpdesk, which spells trouble... Learnt quite alot... I rather want this for my attachment la, but then again, not fully IT, got some mixture of business will be good also!

Today i helped a client installed a 5000 dollars worth of software!! I was holding it like iam holding a gold la... lolz... Any scratch on the cd and there goes my pay!

Hmmm... i really dun have much to tok bout, cox i really have no social life now... All my friends are working in ITP/IAP or working part-time... Iam just glad that iam not joining the league of the slackers during the holidays...

And... I wanna learn more stuff, give me more...! geesh, iam so random, gtg.... ciao...

I saw a backview today,
so similar to yours...
It gives me the tangling sensation,
So i went forward without hesitation
I lost my rationale to realise that its definitely not you
But i still wanted to do it...
And to only find out that its not you...
What am i thinking huh?
I wonder...

Some pple just dunno how to treasure what they have... Don't we ever understand the true meaning of ownership which comes to us without much effort...?

In this gallery,
lies priceless worth of art...
Some are beautiful,
Some evoke a certain feeling within
But only one particular art piece is what i want.

Its common
It may not be as priceless
It may not even worth a second look for some people
But its the art that i want...

However, this particular art work is too priceless for me to own afterall...
As the saying goes, the art chooses its owner, and not the other way round...

At Subway..





Person: hi sir, which bread do u want?


Me: Permasan bread


Me: Btw, give me the 1 Yard one...


Person: 0.0"





Yeah basically, i suffered another subway embarassment again.... Think i have the problem of differentiating between the various statistics lengths of measurement..




Anyway, work's been alright, getting used to the various IT trouble shooting and met lots of friendly pple... The company is not bad, but no orientation was provided for me... And no
training, everything just self learn which is quite tough... Hope i can manage it...

Anyway, gabriel has been teaching me lots of stuff... Thanks man... Took a few pics of my workdesk, which is actually a long table shared by 3 person... lolz...

Coms waiting to be troubleshoot...

And more coms.. Waiting in line... Second from right is my com..

















Dell coms...

















Basically thats bout it.. Iam seeing coms after coms... Shall post more pics if i take any pics.... ciao... Its been a long day for me... Oh, saw jasmine, ms cleaner... lolz.. had a long good chat with her... Good luck for ur job in HP... And in case u happen to read this, i din dare to look at u cox my nose is overflowing with mucus and it keeps leaking out... YUCKS..!!

My company in construction... song.. hee..

















Getting over ain't easy,
Forgetting is harder,
To forcefully wipe away feelings is the hardest...

Iam starting work in like 7 hours' time... Finally i dun have to rot further anymore at home... And i always find it funny that iam liek the only one who does not work during the holidays.. So as of today, the whole of tt04 is working...!!

Anyway, guess whose bdae is it? Wheeeeee..... This guy holds a PSP for less than a mth and wants to sell it... This guy has a gf who loves to cheat me during MINDS... This guy always ask me come to his company and dun wanna come to my company... Guess u all know who la... Those who dunno, here's a very big hint: he loves asking pple to eat punggol nasi and go his house which is so bloody out of place... And his favourite phrase is "eeeeeee.... bo jio sia!" and he always loves to add a word "super" when he is describing something... lolz...

He is................ lesnar chen jinquan! lolx... Anyway, a happy 19th birthday to u... See i so good, blog bout ur bdae... Anyway, enjoy ur day... Now i know why u wanna take one week off.. I din know pple will celebrate their bdae for a week sia.. Shall we make it a public holiday then? hehe...

Anyway, i better head to bed soon, if not cannot wake up... ciao...

Is there a better way to ease this sadness?

Violence, by people
peace, by people

Beauty, by people
Ugliness, by people

Strong dominating the weak, by people
the weak being overtaken, by people

war, by people
peace, by people

greed, by people
selfless acts, by people

money for evil acts, by people
money for good, by people

Ugly thoughts, by people
wonderful insights, by people

Racial war, by people
racial harmony, by people

Separations and betrayal, by people
Harmony, by people

Hatred, by people
love, by people

Evil, by people
good, by people

There are many things in life such as thoughts, actions, morals etc created by people... Its scary to know how evil we can be due to greed.. Yet there are many good things done by people who wnated to stood out to help.. There are so much things in life where we often want to do, but are lazy to do... The heart wants to do, yet we are bound to restrict ourselves, to do things that are considered the norm, and oftn neglecting terrible things that are happening... To honestly say, iam ashamed of myself as a human being, for failing to help others when i knw i could, but i just did not wanna do it...

Just some random thoughts... iam just suddenly sadden by how the world is coming to...

Yet another sleepless night... I forsee another coming...

I miss u every minute since u left...

i thought i will be alright, but iam not...

Haiz... another sleepless night.. Overall, a lousy day.. Ive caused my team to lose all the matches... The feeling is damn fked up! The shots not going ur way, a layup with no defenders in front also can miss, all the rebounds once u take gets snatched off... what the hell am i doing???

Anyway, gtg sleep, have to go vivocity to get smth.... Alone! Anyone wana follow? I doubt so.. Cox all working or going out... sian..

Dawn's leaving
Darkness will soon come
There will be no more mornings in my world
Only night....
But one thing's for sure
Some part of that darkness
Lies a beam of light,
Emmiting from you
Which will continue to bring hope somewhere in my heart...

I can't sleep...
I can't sleep...
I can't sleep...
I can't sleep...
I can't sleep...
I can't sleep...

i just can't sleep...
Iam listening to running away by the midnight hour. U guys should listen to it... Its a very sad song though...

Iam already hook on to you
Only you can release the hook from me
Or else i will be stuck forever...
Now that your going off
The hook is stucked
Iam left stranded,
bloodied by my own sadness and constant pinings
I know that one day u will be back
Till then I will bleed till you return...

What can i say? Its madness today!

Bubblebee Vs Optimus

Sometimes i wonder what lies ahead
How long til my hunger is fed
They say it's hard to make it in this part of town
so many people on this merry-go-round
Some folks try astrology
Some turn to crystal balls
To find an answer
To get through it allI just fall on my knees and i try to prayin the silence i can hear Him say

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time
I often feel like that i'm two steps behind
Somebody must have moved that finish line
There are a thousand reasonswhy i should give up
But i'm stubborn in the things i believe

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the skyI promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to the patience and watch for the sign'cause maybe there's another plan
One i still cant see

A little surprise, like your love in your life
Funny how time changes how we see
The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to the patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time
Everything in its time

Today's class gathering was alright i guess... It just feels wierd without GL and the rest around... I wonder if its just me, i just dun feel the vibe, or maybe iam not giving in much vibe when going out with them... Not that u guys are not fun or what, but i think we belong to diferent groups of pple coming together... Or maybe going out with smaller groups of pple is much more fun! lolz, I seriously dunno what iam talking bout. Anyway, Minds cafe just sucks... With all the games that we dunno how to play, and also its hard to play in large group... But the final game we played was fun! Sorry for the wrong recommendation... Went to watch ratatouile after that, the movie was dead boring in the beginning and at some parts... But towards the middle and ending was kindda funny...

Went to eat tau hway and this fuking lady said "ah pui ah! Why are u standing here, can siam?" I was like *(^&(*^(*(*&)(&*^%$^&%&!! I dun mind the siam thing, but the ah pui was very unnecessary la! But i must admit the tau hway was not bad... Then we went home after that and here i am typing my blog entry..

Anyway, pearleen is leaving for China this coming fri for 5 and a half mths... Wish her all the best and take care ok? Enjoy ur attachment... Shall end my post here, iam dead beat ever since watching the movie. ciao..

What are feelings?
Ive lost them long ago...
What exactly am i feeling now?
I wonder...

Somehow iam feeling kindda nervous now... Cox its a class outing, iam suppose to plan but i kindda did a sloppy job... pls, guys, be more enthu tomolo! if not i will be labeled as a man who always fail to plan a class outing! But seriously dun blame me! lolz.. cox spore really got no place to go...!

Anyway, finally finished watching heroes.. but i still prefer prison break! Anyway life's pretty mundane for me... Congrats to all those who have just finished their tests... Attachment is not as simple as u think... u still got final and interim reports and forthnight reports to do...

Anyway, iam pretty tired already, gotta zzz! ciao.. hope tomolo wil be a fun day... But guys be prepared to spend lots of money.. muhahaha...

ARGH!!! Tong, hang the clothes. Tong, wash the toilets ok and also clean the house floor. Tong, throw the rubbish. Tong, fold the clothes... See the amount of fking tasks! Itas irritating to have someone rining u everytime on the things to do. Housework, thats what i hated to do most! Its so tiring to do housework. I know iam lazy but whenever they ask me to do, i will do. But pls dun use a tone like as if i owe u smth. Dun use a tone like iam ur maid. All these requests from youall could have sound nicer. And in the end, i keep hearing things like: Dun be lazy, go help this, go do that!
Wth... Ive already done so much and you still give me that attitude. Since i do also give attitude, dun do also give attitude, i might as well not do! Just hire a maid la, for god's sake! Or just quit the job and be a housewife la! Why is it that every week must mop the floor, vacum the floor? Do it once every 2 weeks la... What is so difficult bout cleaning the floor once every 2 weeks?

Argh! Sometimes this family wants everthing done to perfection and it gets on my nerves sometimes!

Anyway, to those taking exams, good luck and study hard!

If ur still in the transition in the midst of the confusion
Take a deep breath
And think along the line of what u wanna do with ur life
Only then
Will u find that the things happening in life is in ur favor...

But human's biggest error is that we always dun practise what we preach... And thats why we always regret not living life to the fullest... =(

2 weeks more....

All of us regard life and death as if its a natural cycle
Which is a fact ever since the day we are born

Most will cry only when their close ones pass away
Few will cry when some unknown person is dead

Some people died without regrets cox they led a meaningful life
Some people died without knowing why this kindda thing happen
Some people died due to diseases
Some people died due to war
Some people died due to natural disaster


So, does all these mean that we, human beings are being controlled by strings of destiny attached to us, and be controlled like a puppet?
So what is life and death anyway, as long as we do not die with regrets... But how many of us are able to live and do things the way we want and live the life we want?


Most of us will look back and say why we did not treasure when this person is around, or why didn't i take the initiative to talk to this person... We always know that its too late to say all these when the person is dead. Then why is it that we keep repeating the same mistake of not treasuring everyone, even those whom we've had breif encounter with, when they are still around?
---------------------------------------------

Iam sorry that my post is kindda random, there are many issues regarding life and death going through my head, and i don't really know how to go bout expressing how i feel bout this issue... Thus the randomness...

Well, its been a rainy afternoon, wanted to go town, but checked out local forum and they said 1 litre of tears is only avilable in japan version... @#^&%&^%&^!!! Though i know a bit of jap, but i still have to refer to the jap. cart for reference of words! I can't possibly keep making reference to the charts while reading the book... I guess i will have to wait for the english version or source for other alternatives... i really wanna read it! =(

Anyway, my sis is going to shen zhen i think, to accompany her boss for a business trip... =(
I will miss her though! And now iam stucked with my parents! And my dad is going taiwan next tues... How come they got so many opportunities to go overseas? but not me....

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When its time to give up,
I will.
But now,
lets keep it as it is now...

Today's just another normal slacking day for me. Ive sent in tonnes of emails to companies for part time jobs but all taken up or they will say, we need someone who can stay longer than 2 and a half mths... Thus ive decided, not to work during holidays.. Just slack and hopefully can go overseas... Meanwhile i shall keep watching dramas and animes...

To the peeps taking their tests next week, dun envy me, cox soon u all will be like me, and i will be like u all now, mugging for exams. I keep wondering if i lost touch with studies or not, afterall 6 mths is neither a long period nor a short period of time. Hopefully, i can do well enough to get into a uni!

Yesterday, played bball with some people. Saw steven, wei quan and some other pple. Quite enjoyable, but got this crap asshole suddenly in the middle of the game walk into the court which we are playing at, and wanted to join in. And we have to take in another person to make it 4 v 4. Suay suay, this fellow have to come and ruin our game. We thought he could play, but in the end, play like noob. Dun even know how to pass, still dare to say wanna join in. Sian, in the end we lost 11-5... Kindda injure my tendon again, this time is my left leg. Great... no more bball for me for the next few days.. I shall continue to nua at home. Iam probably going town tomorrow, alone, to find a book called 1 litre of tears author is aya... Anyone who happens to read this can tell me where i can get the book? thanks...

Anyway, to those mugging for exams, good luck and study hard! Tc...


Love for someone
Is just like an ocean
Calm on the surface
With constant showing of ripples and waves of affection for someone
But deep underneath lies currents of feelings
Which are unexplainable and unexpressable...

Feelings... is something which is uncontrollable. It not something where u can just stop thinking bout it and thats the end of story, when u know somewhere deep, that feeling still has a glow. Its hard to let go... Its hard to accept that someone u like doesn't like u. One good friend once told me, "u can't expect any person u like to like u back", which really is so true...

Sometimes i wish i can smile for the rest of the day and be happy, but its always not the case. Whenever iam alone wthout my friends, i revert back to myself... A gloomy and unhappy me. In the end, i started asking myself, why am i studying so hard, why am i trying to be happy in front of her, why din i bring the courage to tell her iam unhappy and more whys... In the end, i find myself daydreaming bout something where i can nv get my answers...

Some things are just not meant to be... Sorry, i just got a little emo... but i promised that i will get better... i will try, cox there are many more things in life which is more impt! tc all...

its hard to accept the fact that your going somewhere, far from me...

Hi guys! Finally, iam back to blog... Decided not to abandon this blog... Anyway, holidays have been great so far. With causal meeting ups with my class, playing winning 11 etc, its been long since i have experienced this kindda life... Really enjoyable.. haha...

Anyway, i have been watching a show called One Litre of Tears. It is about a girl called Aya Kito who was diagnosed with a disease called Spinocerebellar Degeneration when she was just 15 years of age. She was able to continue her life until at the age of 25 yrs old, when she died. It is based on a true story and is a really touching show. When she was 15, she started writing a diary, recounting her daily encounters and her feelings until the day where she cannot writes. Slowly, this disease took away her ability to perform simple tasks of her daily life, such as walking, writing, talking and etc. However, she gets to retain all her mental abilities which is why she is living in pain. Imagine you wanna walk, but u just couldn't stand up to walk and imagine u wanna say thanks to that person but u could not express how u felt. This is really a terrrible feeling.

I must really say, this drama is the best show i have ever watched, it really epics how human life is strong yet fragile at the same time. Even though Aya could not do many things, but her determination to live is just termendous, it also touched the people around her. In school, although her friends are helping her, but they began to find it to be a chore because of the lack of social and study life due to the time needed to help her get around the school. Her parents are also giving their best to care for her. It really evokes lots of emotions and thoughts in me.

Like what she wrote in her diary, "just being alive is such a lovely and wonderful thing." It gives us a new meaning of our perspective to life. One phrase which really touched was when she said in her diary, "If you look up at the sky after falling down, the blue sky is also today stretching limitlessly and smiles at me... Iam alive".

So, guys if u have the free time, go watch this drama, although the romance is not based on true story, but the feelings and thoughts are according to the diary that she wrote. She was just 15 and she had to face such truth of suffering from an incurable disease.

Many times, we are complaining bout life, school, work, romance, money and wanting to live in luxury but we often overlook the greatness of being alive, being abe to run, being able to talk, being able to perform daily tasks which seems simple to us but in fact difficult for people who suffered from diseases etc. Thus, these shows are constant reminders to us,of how life can be wonderful. Even though. such thoughts of how simple tasks we do are deemed simple by us, but to other people, it is impossible it is a wishful thought of standing up to walk. After watching this drama, i really thought things out. Hope you guys will watch this drama and realise the greatness of life itself. Tc...

I might be closing down this blog, for some personal reasons... Meanwhile i will be on hiatus, probably weeks or mths or maybe just days... thanks for tuning to my blog for the past few mths... Tc all...

-----> iam glad everything's been sort out... I know its impossible between us, but u can't stop me from liking u... U do know that ur one very extraordinary girl... to be able to make me smile even though iam feeling real sad... thanks for everything and good luck for everything u do! hope you will find a guy who's suitable for u.. This will probably be my final dedication to u<-----

How many times must i shed tears for u?
how many times do u have to invade my mind?
how many times do i have to sacrifice for u?
how much time do u want me to waste on u?
how many times do u want me to go crazy over u?
i have only 1 live
so please, just let me off
this feeling is killing me...
i hate the world now...
all because of u
but u just din realise it
don u?

My heart sank to the deepest sea
so far till i cannot reach it
iam no longer who i am
ive lost all emotions
i thought i will be alright
but i was wrong
pls dun leave
i really need to feel ur presence
i wouldn't know what to do if u choose to leave
iam afraid i might not be able to take it...

Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack
Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack
Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack Pack pack
AND TONNES OF PACKING...
Going nuts....

----> All i can follow is your shadow only... <----

I seriously dunno what to update to you guys.... hahaz... shall talk bout the dinner yesterday... The food is just ok for me... maybe cox of my flu... hahaz... i cannot taste anything at all... but the company was fun... its been long since ive felt the company of that many pple... And i think i ve made a complete fool of myself when i made jokes that only i can understand... i think i can see many of them nodding in agreement...



its like 2 weeks to the end of attachment, iam really looking forward to it... Ah peng said something that almost made me cry... He is like the first 40 plus yr old friend that i really can communicate to really well... and sharon too... she said "without u, no more people will buy apple juice for us liao"... They are the ones who really kept me going... Anyway, i think its still early to give them a farewell entry here.. haha



Anyway, ive just heard this song by dishwalla, called angels or devils... its a super nice song... Though the context of the song doesn't apply in my case.... its a super emmo song... i prefer the piano version though... makes a person feel more emo... go listen to it!



If life is just a game,

where i can call it quits as and when i like

where i can do things that i like

where i can delete things that i dislike

where only my rules will apply

wouldn't it be great?

But would that defeat the purpose of life itself?

where we are leading a life that is unpredictable

where we cannot forsee the future...



-----> i really wanna see u now... can i? <-----

ah peng: hey why u look so tired? nv slp ah?
me: sick lor... flu
ah peng: confirm last night catch too many sotong is it?
me: huh?
the drivers: evil grins
me: *rolls eyes*

Somewhere along the clouds
lies a silver lining
which represents hope which has finally prevail
our dark world shall beam with light
and light will always overshadow darkness
soon my world will be light up once again for me...

Sometimes i scared that i might explode and quit my attchment just like that! And tomolo iam working!!! God.... who knows i really hate this freaking job of mine?

-----> my feelings for u is unexplainable <-----

Look at the time!! Damn... Iam always sleeping at this hour... And tomolo i got work!!! Can i not go??? Argh!!!! Iam so totally not in the mood to go to my company which i dreaded the most...

Another 3 weeeks to the end! and it seemed like 3 yrs left.... pls.... let time past faster! ciao!
my heart sank when u chose to be attached overseas

-----> Do u know much influence u had on my life? <-----

Its been long since ive smiled from within
I wanna wipe off this facade smile of mine
And smile from the bottom of my heart
When will smiling from within stop being so hard?

Today, totally had no mood to work, shall i say this surge of depression is back since last week. Argh, iam like so demoralised all again though i keep saying its ok i got posted to such company! gosh, when will i stop feeling this way! Think the pple in the company can see that iam reluctant to do anything, not as proactive anymore. But its still anothr 3 weeks only till the end of attachment! Really looking forward. And stupid report wants us to write o what we do for the last 2 weeks, i think the teachers are out to get me. First they send me to this company and they want us to write report in a way that as if we contributed alot. The report format is out to fail me la! So iam just gonna say iam packing for the last 2 fuking mths. Woots! Shiok! I love packing! I love doing mindless stuff like this. I love my table to bits, i love staying outside instead of inside in a aircon room! (hope u guys realised that iam jut being a sarcastic moron)
And i got a burning question in my heart that ive been wanting to ask NP lec, is my GPA so fuking low that i deserved to get send to such company? Why other pple GPA lower than me can get into corporate company leh? TO those who think iam insulting u for ur gpa, i dun mean it.

Enough of rants! I know u guys arew tired of listening to the above CRAP... Sorry for that...
Anyway, watched transformers yesterday, super nice! Esp. the transformation process... The sound and the animation details just rocks! Anyway, iam watching harry potter in like half an hours time! iam so Excited!!!

-----> Thanks for coming! More meet ups pls? <-----

I can't sleep... period!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anyway tothe whole nation, is counter terrorism more important or living in a healthy world that ismore impt... No matter what we do, we will cease to live, one day we will be the ones causing our own extinction. No amount of effort is able to overcome cause a solution will soon be overempowered by another major problem... I may sound kindda demoralising here, but i believe its our own selfish acts which leads to destruction... No choice, human beings, we are selfcentred. They always say, the best way to solve a problem is to eliminate the root of the problem and i believe its the human mind that is polluted. Once everyone gets the correct concept, we will not commit any heinous stupid acts like killing one another or polluting our earth. Think bout it!

Sorry bout my random post, iam just writing what iam thinking now... For now, iam just gonna continue to brainwash myself, thinking that completing my education and pursuing a job is more impt than saving the earth and counter terrorism! To those pple who are self induldging themselves with this mindless theory, including me: is education stil more impt than world issues?

You know sometimes, my parents just love pissing me off... Its like they knew ages ago that i dun like doing certain things and i will attitude them if they ask me to do it and yet they keep asking me to do this and that (stuff that i dun like to do).... Its irritating la! And the point is whenever i give attitude, they will reprimand me for being so unwillling to do... but they knew it all along that i dun like to do it.. why keep asking me to do stuff that i dun like?? For example my dad called the house phone usin his hp when he was in bed at 1am ish to ask me to spray insecticide to the rubbish bin so that ants wun come.. wtf? Its like 1 plus already leh... And whats this theory of spraying insecticide to the rubbish? ANyone does that? see.. this is the reaso why i locked myself in the room.. cox the moment i come out, u guys will keep asking me to do stuff... Ridiculous........ iam in like some shitty mood now and this happens to be my off day... argh....

totally shagged tday but stil managed to play bball.... totally sucks... lost 4 matches consecutively in a row... With the same team somemore.. wth! Anyway, spent 1 and a half hour to help check whether all the things for the new build order is completed or not... See the amount of stuff!! The whole storeroom was fileed with that particular order... lucky got my colleaugue help, if not i really will need 3 hrs to check... lolz..

Anyway, took a day break, felt that i really need a good sleep... lolz... ANyway, went for dinner at hougang with my class 2 days ago... Its a fun fun day! They really lighten up my day.. cox i wasn't feeling all too good on that day! Really have not regret travelling fro lavender to hougang! haha... The western food somehow sucks, for me... i mean the chicken cutlet, its tough and tasted kindda salty...

Wanted to post pic but somehow msn is nto working and i cannot received the pics...

Anyway, attachment's ending in like a mth's time! Really looking forwad to that day... And can we like have a full class reunion or not!1!?? When ah? Its like ia always meeting part of the class for every outings... And to all BLSS pple who asked me regarding the carnival, iam still wondering wehether to go for the carnival on sat or not, cox i got work.. so iam not too sure..
iam starting to lose focus already, think iam really into winning 11 already... i still have some scores to settle bout winning 11 with marcus! ciao...

-----> i feel like iam leading my life because of you <----

If iam a singer,
i will compose the best melody for u

if iam an artist,
i will draw the most beautiful picture of u

if iam a poet,
i will compose a poem everyday just for u

if iam a photographer,
i will capture the most beautiful side of u

if iam a lover of yours
i will make sure that every moment of your life is colourful...

will u give me the chance?

Hi peeps.. Today was another routine for me except that its a little different.. lolz... Went to work for like 3 hrs only then went BBDC... met up with cus at bbdc... then ended up having to wait for 2 hrs just to register -.-"... So we decided to just go home... Damn pai seh...

Played winning 11 and tok crap etc, then finally he went off.... lolz... Total expense breakdown for marcus tan : 2 cans of soft drink which is 2.40, tidbits etc which is 3 bucks, electricity and water consumption which is bout 1 dolllar and it all adds up to bout 10 bucks.. Pls bank in to me.. thanks..

Lol.. Kidding de la... i where got so petty hor... Anyway iam going off to malaysia soon in like 6 hour's time... and my report is in a "anyhow do" state... And tomolo dunno got time to do or not.... haiz... shall worry bout it tomolo then... hehe... ciao...

-----> Can i turn back time, to the time where i get to see you everyday? <-----

Finally ima bothered to update my blog... Anyway lunch with les yesterday.. Chatted bout work stuff, think is mainly me complaining again! HAhaaz, thanks for hearing me out..

Went to jp just now with my mum, bought a new bball shoes...!! Finally, cox mine looks ragged and the shoes got one big hole. Then went to crystal jade for dinnner and went home...

Iam feeling damn excited now cox tomolo's NBA draft!! Ok i know non bball fans will be like, sian.. hhaz... Anyway, seriously hope yi jian lian gets drafted to a good team! He is good, and with oden and durant, and horford and brewer, so many upcoming contenders this yr and all are quite good... Durant is said to be the next big thing after lebron, which is so true.. offensively, perimeter shots, slicing and dicing, he is mr do it all man.. With the next upcoming contender, Oden is compared to Hakeem Olajuwon as a versatile center and hawks seriosuly needs some big guys who can grab some rebounds and gets some block shots.... got a feeling that hawks will choose a more flexible shooter than a good center, so i think durant will be the number 1 pick...

And kobe might be going to chicago which i think is useless cox got gordan and hindrich... And kevin garnet is going to lakers?? -.-" With him and kobe, lakers might be alot more stronger...

hahaz, enough of NBA already, think u guys are bored by my post... gtg watch videos on youtube... ciao...

-----> Waiting for the right moment <-----

Sometimes i wonder what iam really angry at... U know, its like i suddenly got angry for no apparent reason.. And ive been rather disrespectful to my parents. Giving them attitude and yet they still compromise me. I seriously dunno what iam already angry with. Perhaps i still feel a sense of unfairness for being posted to such company. Its not fun when some auntie walk pasts u and say, "next time dun be like that kor kor, so young do this kind of job". it feels fuking unfair, its not like iam uneducated or something... For this job, i dun really have the responsibility to be a fuking storeman u see... Thats what u guys dunno... I could just hac care bout everything and do a lousy job and at the end of the day, u guys are the one at loss, not me.I really hate going to work now... There's always so much things to pack and take! ARGH! Let this bloody attachment end quick..........

Btw i really wanna apologise to a good fren whom i vented my anger on this afternoon... Iam really sorry and i know u really tried helping me...

-----> I realized that at the end of the day, iam just being a stupid coward <-----

I looked into the water
And i saw reflections
Reflections of u and me holding hands
I stood there, induldging in this fantasy
And then i realized its all nothing but illusion
Now ive finally awoken to reality
And iam left with nothing but an empty shell
would u be the one to breath life into me once more?

a F**ked up day.... nth more nth less... i seriously wanna end this bloody attachment quick!
A note of advice: If you ever think that your going through this ordeal which you think you wun be able to get through, try remembering the last ordeal you faced in which u felt the same way and convince yourself that "if i can get through the previous ordeal then i will be able to get through this one"... I dunno how long i can withstand but its just another 7 weeks... Hang on!

-----> Missing you becomes a daily gruesome task for me... <-----

When ur all alone
With no one to fall back on
Your on ur own
Literally
Living a life of solitary
In this kingdom you called "Yourself and nth else"
You live a selfish life
Ignoring all the people you once ever had contact with
All you know is whatever happens you only rely on yourself
In the end things will get too much for you to bear
And you start wondering why is this kingdom filled with senseless defence called "seclusion"
Which fends off people who tried to care for you...

Copyrighted by Mr Thomas Chua... Lolz...

Feeling lousy cox spurs won in NBA! Lolz... Kindda made my mood bad... Sianz, thanks marcus for the live coverage.. U should be a sports presenter man... hehe... Overall, its an easy win, timmy under performed but effort was made up by ginobili and tony... robert horry did well in game 3... Kudos to them... Good teamwork, good defence and parker really impressed me with his 3 point shoooting... But at the rate he is scoring esp. his layups, he is gonna injured big time someday. lolz... Look at his videos when he lay up, he is always falling on the floor...

Anyway, lebron will be back.... He needs better team mates a better point guard esp. Big Z did not perform well at all! If not they might have actually won... Nvm there's still next yr... Upcoming event is the NBA draft 2007! Watch out for yi jian lian man! I nv thought he will be going to NBA though i saw his matches in CBA before... haha.

Ok la, enough of NBA news, yesterday, spent the whole night cleaning the lreafs of the "ba chang" with my sister. Washed mushroom etc... Kindda fun but tiring. But the effort was worth it cox my mother makes fantastic ba changs! Haha...

Anyway rewatched PRIDE by takuya kimura... Ultra nice show, one of my fav jap drama... hahaz..

And there's still report to comp[lete and here iam slacking and watching PRIDE! Hahaz.. Gonna go do my report... ciao.. Btw, check out the video ive embedded in my blog.. It literally drove me to tears.. Tc all...

Cavs lost again! Lebron did well... So are the rest,.. but not well enough... Think spurs confir win already... sad...!! Nvm afterall its their first experience in the finals, and they did fairly well...
Work today was all pack pack pack and more packing! orders of New builts and stuff seriously can kill us man!
Ermm....... Nth much already.. lol...Just work work work till 3rd aug!! Pls let this attachment end as soon as i wake up tomolo.... In my dreams i think... Anyway these few days, theres so much packing to do that iam getting a little cranky...

And so i took a photo of myself being taken over by darth vader -_-"....

This is what u do when job simply gets u on ur nerves... ciao.

-----> what's this empty feeling that iam having... <-----

website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery
website pack delivery
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website pack delivery website pack delivery
website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery website pack delivery

BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dunno what iam feeling now..! its like a mixture of anger, fustration, uselessness, confused, helplessness, and other feelings... argh! I hate this feeling its making me exploding!!! What is wrong with me??!

Had ramen for breakfast... Full as helll, i really missed the ramen by les and gl! Damn nice... Lolz... this is so random... ANyway lebron did nto delivered as promised in game one against spurs! But fear not, he already promised us that he will play better tonight! he is a fast learner as proclaimed, go penetrate that defense and dunk man! I seriously think that spurs is too good, even the substitutions such as robert horry and manu who is a sub for spurs in game one??

Anyway enough of basketball, working was madlike hell on fri and sat! Pack until i can die...Ah peng and michelle did not come, tonnes of new built and stupid list of orders consisting of items which cost only like 3 or 4 bucks.. lolz... Seriosusly, its not worth to pack such items... waste resources.. lolz..

my family Went to kulai last night to have dinner.. Glad to see all my cuzzies...

anyway, IAP is ending soon!!! Woots... Another one mth plus and all's over i will definitel missed my co workers! They are so good, except one or two of the drivers? lolz... Recently i discovered that i get easily agitated over small things, for example, my mother ask me to this and that (all are simple takss) but i got angry and rant at them! Iam sorry, really, i din mean to... Work is really getting on my nerves sometimes... Hope u all will understand... Ok la, gtg now.... going out later...! Weeee..... ciao.

----> 2 hr and 15 mins to happiness! <-----

Sinking into the depths of ocean,
I saw a glimpse of light,
so blurry, yet so bright,
i tried trailing it,
but ive lost it
how i wish i could find it
but it can only be etched to my memories from the moment ive lost it
Now that it has resurfaced
so far yet so near
should i let go or continue trailing it?

----> the glimpse that meant so much to me... <----

ARGH! Work today simply sucks. lolz, marcus ur so damn rifght bout me being very contradictive. I think i like the people in the company but its the envoronment that sucks. I dunno. Anyway, apck and pack and pack like crazy dog... i haven have enough rest for even 5 mins and here comes things to pack again! And we barely made it for the delivering of the things for shipment tonight la.. End up dunno why tml can deliver to them, when the ship i heard is leaving tonight... -.-"

Anyway, 8 or 9 more weeks and iam free!!! From all these, from this kindda envoronment that i really dislike. This is definitely not the kind of environment of company i wanna work in, so i better buck up! Good luck to the next intern, oh i mean kelvin. lolz!

Finally gotr my hp fixed, total damage = 65 bucks, but the phone itself is sort of a gift from my sis which costs 298 dollars last time with my plan, so i gotta fix it. Anyway saw cf, played bball a while and went home. Anyway, to those taking exams, congrats, finally u guys are freed from the torture. hehe..... ciao...

---> Bus ride=2 bucks, journey time=45 mins, seeing u = 5 mins, but a glance of u = priceless <----

Woohoo!!! Ive withnessed clevelands cavalier won! They got into finals! They beat pistons, most importantly lebron leads them into finals within just 2 yrs upon entering clevelands..!! Iam right bout lebron afterall, he is not the next jordon, but he's himself, lebron #23! My inspiration man! How i wish i could play like him. WHo can score even when there are liek 2 or 3 defienders all over him, scored 29/30 last points during game 5, does well assist and can even dunk after doing a spin move on defender? Its LBJ! hahaz..

The 2 heros of game 6 vs pistons! James and gibson. And he is playing super good in playoffs.. Though i think he's not a good guard, but his performance rocks big time during the playoffs!

Lebron!!! #23

Lebron! Iam going crazy over him... Iam not gay la!!! lolz..

Of course not to forget bout Big Z... And drew gooden , larry hughes, eric snow and of course the rising star sasha palvovic... Next up unscrupulous team of bruce bowen and robert horrry, of course tony parker and tim duncan are not like them! Good luck cleveland!

Shagged day man... Imports came, have to move goods into warehouse... Sweat until my whole jeans wet... But good exercise la, this is how i console myself... Iam kindda used to thislifestyle now.

Rreport must handin on thurs and my report is like anyhow do one... Sian. ANyone help!!? And i realised that my website for the company looks like a noob one! But lucky my LO says its ok. Hmm... nth much to update!! Lolz... All i know is that ive got bout 2 mths and iam free from all these.. But i heard that this sem in sch is ultra tough.. With so many presentation to do... Hope i can get through it, i shall worry it next sem... Anyway to those of u in school, dun feel too stress, cox u can always rely on ur groupmembers, and things will always turn out "not so bad" afterall... And good luck for ur tests. Those in IAP, good luck for the report... hahaz.. ciao..

---> Do u know how much i wished i could be with u and go through what ur going through now? <----

Basketball... I used to have a passion for it... Now, no... Totally out of mood. Sian. I begin to feel boring. My legs are hurting when i play bball.. I dun care bout winning anymore, i just wanna end every game quick...

Met up with the usual gang, played bball, things turned ugly when some motherfucker gives u attitude and accuse u of doing the wrong things... Its damn sad when ur teammates dun pass the ball to u when ur at the right position. I run around, postup, no one pass me the damn ball... And this particular guy, good in bball, but i seriousl dunno what he is trying to do. U attack to the rim when the centre of the perimeter is filled with 4 defenders against u.. U get du lan when u dun have the ball. U blame me for helping u screen, u blame me for not helping u screen, u blame me for not saying where is the direction of the screen when no one even bother to tell me that i got screened. I admit that iam lousy, passing and stuff and to the fellow who said i did not looked while i passed, ive looked la.. Pls, if passing u have to look at the person then the defenders will know what...

The 2 guys, since u 2 are good friends, u all will nv blame each other and i think u guys only see that the fault is with me, not with u all.. One of u solo, the other once i hold the ball, u call for the ball... Pls la, i only hold it for one sec la and u expect me to pass liao. WTF? Damn pissed esp. when this fellow got pissed with me and wanted to change person, but i volunteered to be out, dun wish to ruin ur fuking mood cox the sight of u ruins mine too. I know u dislike me, but pls, dun be a copycat and follow what ur that fren say la.. He say i do this u also say... WTH... Anyway, i just walked off the court, got so pissed with them. Their good as frenzz but when in court they just blame me for everything... Not gonna play with u guys anymore, i enjoyed freindship with u all but not bball session, u guys ruin my mood for bball...

Mr chua is totally in a bad mood, website must redo, interim report haven finish, no friends, iam always alone now, eating lunch alone sucks even more... I miss my friends, i miss my classes, i miss my poly life... And with the work pillling, the neverending orders to clear, sweating my guts out from 8 to 5... Now i know money is hard earned...

Ok la enough of rants, gonna watch naruto! To the bball frenzz, sorry bout my attitude but this is me, look at urself, ur style of playing before u criticised mine... Ciao

----> Do u know that ur being missed by me? <----