The First Time

She looks around, searching with her eyes the comforting voice she has grown used to hearing. Once found, a look of peace replaces the tears in her eyes. I smile at her and in my mama voice tell her "hi" reassuring her that she is ok and safe now that mama is here, something she already knew once her eyes settled on mine. It amazes me how quickly a baby learns to trust and how much I still struggle! 

I pick her up and carry her down the steps, whispering in her ear many "I love you's" and telling her how pretty Jesus made her, all the while her little hand gripping the collar of my shirt and holding on ever so tightly. We find our spot on the couch, settle in and get comfortable. I do what comes natural and so does she, the suckling bringing nourishment and comfort. She is getting old enough to look up into my eyes, a moment I always treasured while nursing both Emma and Caleb as well. It is as if she is making sure I am still there, never wanting to lose sight of me - her comfort and safe place. 

I place her over my shoulder, patting her back ever so lightly and hum whichever song comes to mind. She nestles into the nape of my neck and I hear the gentle rhythm of her breathing, her heart still feels as if it is beating in tune with mine. Sleep overcomes her and I rise to place her back into her bed, savoring the sleepy cuddles as long as I can. 

She is 6 weeks and 5 days old today. Too old for me already. I want to go back to that room in the hospital on the day she was born. I want to hold her again for the first time. I want to look into her eyes and kiss her soft skin and breathe her in all over again! This sweet baby is truly living up to her middle name of Joy. For she has been such a Joy from the moment I knew God was knitting her together inside my womb. She continues to fill my life with Joy when she smiles up at me and giggles. When she grabs my thumb and wraps her little fist around it. When noone seems to be able to bring her the comfort and peace she needs quite like I do. There is just something so beautiful about being a mama! 

“Joy is the serious business of Heaven.” ~ C. S. Lewis

Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory. ~ 1 Peter 1:8

On Wanting to Stop the Hands of Time

She's one month old today! 

As cliche' as this sounds, I am wanting to stop the hands of time. Freeze these moments, these days, with her this little. Keep her this cuddly and squishy for a lot longer than time allows! 

But since I am dreaming the impossible, I will instead embrace and hold onto each memory made, cherishing them all and thanking the One who gave me such a beautiful blessing! 

Then God promises to love me all day, 
      sing songs all through the night! 
      My life is God's prayer. ~ Psalm 42:8 {the MSG}

{these days}

Rhythm. It's what our days have been lacking, but at the same time, it is what we have slowly started to gain back again.  

Any time a new baby arrives, things seem to get a bit jumbled and life takes a turn in a different, but good, direction. Working to get us all back on the right track has been a lot easier than I had originally anticipated. It has actually been quite enjoyable. The sweetness of our baby girl fitting right in with our way of life. She is as pleasant as any baby can be and a complete Joy. 

These days we are counting our blessings - thankful for, 

Tiny Baby Feet

 My sweet  older girl who has become such a wonderful help to her mama 

The silliness that comes from my older two children 

Early morning cuddles 

Babywearing 

The love and sibling bond between Emma and Caleb

Kindness from others 

My Husband  

Lazy Sunday afternoons listening to the rain 

Blackberry Cobbler 

Friendship - no matter how near or far

Great Reads 

Wonderful views     


   

“The unfolding of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” Psalm 119:130

Being Thankful for the Here and Now

The summer is passing by a little too quickly. School will be starting soon for us and I need to get myself started on getting organized. Since the baby has yet to make her appearance, I have been taking every opportunity to start cleaning things out, making room for the fun new things we have purchased for this year!

We are still waiting on 4 more books to arrive, then it will be time to start planning!

Throughout this process of reorganizing and finding room for all the new, it is easy for me to let my mind wander to what I wish I had - a house with an extra room to use as our "school room". Unlimited homeschool funds to buy whatever we wanted. Pretty shelves and desks and chairs. Yep, my mind wandered about all that today while I sorted, threw out, and re-organized all of our supplies.

But, not long after, I was brought back to reality and reminded that I need to be thankful for the here and now. Not the if only.

Thankful for the freedom to choose where and how my children are educated.
Thankful for the fact that I get to be their teacher.
Thankful for the money we do have to buy the books and supplies that are needed for our preferred method of homeschooling.
Thankful for wonderful homeschool curriculum available to teach my children His Truths.
Thankful for websites like this one {and this one} where I was able to purchase a few of our textbooks for more than half-off!
Thankful for a supportive husband.
Thankful for a supportive family.
Thankful for the wonderful homeschool support and community I have found through social media.
Thankful for children who are eager to learn and are making this whole experience all the greater.
Thankful for the guidance from my Heavenly Father.
Thankful for the step of faith I was not scared to take.

I am going to go into this new school year being thankful for the here and now and not let greed and envy steal my joy out of this wonderful journey!

Clap your hands, all peoples! Shout to God with loud songs of joy! ~ Psalm 47:1



Just for Me

I pull out the boxes with all the saved baby things. Booties, onsies, sleepers, and sundresses. All so tiny - I can't remember any of my babes being so little!

I wash them all, reminiscing of the times Emma wore them and daydreaming of the upcoming times that you will wear these same, adorable, pieces of clothing - realizing how blessed you already are. How blessed we all are!

I place each item, clean and folded, in your drawers, thinking of you and becoming more and more anxious!

Your bed is made. Sheets washed and smelling baby clean. Emma placed the baby doll that she bought for you in the corner of your crib. The doll is all smiles, as we all are, awating for your arrival! I just pulled the fresh smelling, clean diapers from the dryer and a smile comes across my face! I cannot wait to see your little tush wrapped up in soft cloth!

A few handmade mama knits and sewn mama made items have been finished and are waiting to be worn. Each item created just for you out of love from me! Each stitch had you in mind. How fun it was to sit and watch each bootie, hat, and dress, come to life as each knitted and sewn stitch was made. 

And in just a few weeks {2 weeks 6 days!} I will get to see the handmade blessing that God created just for me. Each thread of your beauty He created with His Almighty hands out of love for me! You are His treasured possesion and He is trusting you to me! Just as He has done before with Emma and Caleb. How am I so blessed?

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them." ~ Psalm 139:13-16

Tears of joy flood my eyes every morning as I pray for you, your sister, and your brother. How I love each of you so much! Your daddy and I are not rich at all according to the world's standards, but we are rich beyond imagination with the gifts God has given us named Emma, Caleb, and you, sweet baby girl! Your presence is already abundant in our home and it hasn't even graced it yet!

Today I will sit poolside, watching Emma and Caleb splash around in the coolness of the water on yet another hot summer day, knitting a little sweater, for you, to wear when the weather cools this fall! Thinking all the while of you and how very anxious we all still are!

Soon baby girl!! And I am all smiles!! I simply cannot wait!!

God blessed them and said, "Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth." ~ Genesis 1:22


Linking up with Lydia!

Lately...

The weather lately has been nothing but perfect and we've been outside enjoying every last second of it that we can!

The sky has been the most gorgeous shade of blue and the sun seems to have never shown any brighter around here. So much joy has been celebrated lately and thanks to my fun, new, toy, I have been capturing every moment of it!

{cupcakes that my sister made...she really needs to open her own cupcake shop!}

This past weekend found us celebrating a special little guys birthday as well as allowing me to enjoy a day of doing something that I just cannot get enough of lately - learning about alpaca's, sheep, and the wonderful world of fiber! We attended a sheep and fiber fest, my first, and let me just say that my experience there only confirmed even more how much I need to live on a little farm with some sheep and alpaca's of my own! My husband even commented that he never would have thought I would want to be a country girl - but I do sweetie, I really, really, do!

{sheep herding}

{my bag of goodies}

This is my life, right now. Anticipating summer's offical arrival, but enjoying this warm spring weather until then. Still trying, each and everyday, to simplify and enjoy life, just as it is, right where I am! For the future looks so bright, filled with so much joy, as well as new life and new adventures.

We cannot wait! It is only going to get better...

What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? ~ Romans 8:31

Blessed Everyday in the Miracles

{Trying to get Caleb to smile and look at the camera at the same time can, at most times, be a trying feat. Hence the reason his tongue is sticking out in this pic and Emma looks upset that he will not cooperate!}

They make me laugh. Everyday!
Their little quirks and out-of-nowhere repeats of what they once heard mama or daddy say has me wondering most days, "how did they remember that?".
It is truly amazing to me how much their little minds are soaking up and learning, all on their own, each and everyday!
One day they start to crawl then walk and it's like, "how did that happen? I never taught them that!"
They start to talk putting sentences together right before my eyes. Helping themselves to fruit and juice in the kitchen. Feeding the dogs, making their beds, putting their clothes away once mama has them washed and folded. These little miracles growing up ever so quickly right in front of me.
And if I am too busy, I will miss it. Miss out on all the little blessings these little miracles give to me in one day!

{I just adore this pic of my mom and sister walking with my kids!}

God gifted these children to me! I know they belong to Him and are essentially on "loan" to me, so while we are here on this earth together, I want to enjoy every moment with them. The good and the bad. The hard and the easy. The laughter, tears, triumphs, failures. Because they all exist in each and everyone of our lives. I want to show my children how to praise God in the good and the bad, as I am learning to do in my own life.

I want to be present through it all. Since I cannot have a video camera on 24/7 catching it all so I don't forget, I want to be available to witness it all - as much as I can - and cherish, saving the memory in my mind and my heart.

Maybe it is the pregnancy hormones really kicking in, or the fact that we just celebrated Mother's Day, but I have been feeling extra sentimental towards my children lately and how truly blessed I really am. I am in awe of how loving and giving my Jesus is! Everytime I look into their little faces, I am reminded of just how much He loves me!

Beyond anxious to meet our newest little girl in a few short weeks and experience a new set of blessings each and evertday!

::

**hubby gifted me an iPhone for my b-day and needless to say, I am having way too much fun with it. all the pics in this post were taken and edited with the iPhone! Love it!!

**we had the pleasure of visiting the Detroit Zoo while visiting with my aunt last week. this is where these pics were taken at.

::

"Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him." ~ Psalm 127:3

For you, sweet little one

I have been thinking of you a lot lately.
It may have something to do with the constant kicking, but I honestly do not mind.
Kick away, little one. I like knowing that you are there and like to think that you are trying to kick your way out, because I know you are just as anxious as I to meet!

I have to tell you how blessed you already are.
God has given you an amazing big sister who has prayed for you long before we knew you were coming. She is just as anxious as, if not more than, I am for you to arrive! Oh the plans she has for you! Sisters are a blessing...a treasure! I love my sister, your Aunt Holly, and I pray you and Emma become the best of friends, as sisters should!
And Caleb...your big brother...oh what a joy! I always wish I had an older brother. So this, sweet one, is truly a gift indeed. He is so gentle and kind-hearted. I have a feeling that he is going to take you under his wing and show you how to do most anything. He is going to look out for you and be your protector, but most of all, your friend, just like a big brother should be.

Your daddy, is amazing! As you get a bit older, he will be the one with whom you will have all the fun with! He will chase you and do somersaults with you, wrestle on the couch, jump on the bed, and teach you how to laugh at just about everything. He will love you so hard and make sure that you know it each and everday! Emma and Caleb adore him, but I know they will gladly share him with you!

As for me, well, I am your mama. I will love you no matter what. I have prayed for you from the beginning...always knowing from way back when that I wanted to be a mama to as many children as God will bless me with! I am looking forward to seeing you grow and witnessing your personality; your likes and dislikes; and just how different, or alike, you and Emma will be! I can't wait to look into your eyes and see you smile for the first time - hearing you laugh and talk for the first time as well! I am anxious to see if you will end up with red hair, or the same light brown as Emma and Caleb. But most important, I cannot wait to teach you about Jesus and watch you fall madly in love with Him! For He loves you more than your daddy and I ever could!

Counting down the weeks...11 more to go! I cannot wait, baby girl!

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ~ Psalm 139: 13-14

{weekending}

This weekend was spent enjoying some much needed down time.
The cooler temps and rainy weather made it perfect for said relaxation.
Chili cooking in the crock pot and yummy cornbread muffins for dinner on Saturday night.
Having the hands of my beloved hold a pretty, new, skein of yarn while I wound it into a gorgeous, new, ball in excited anticipation of getting it onto the needles!
Enjoying the first three movies in this series and looking forward to obtaining and watching the rest. So very good! I belong in that time period!
Saturday night game of Scrabble and laughter...always laughter!
Today will begin with church and later result in much of the same as yesterday!
Relaxing, loving, enjoying, laughing!

How was your weekend?


weekending with Amanda...

“Six days you shall work, but on the seventh day you shall rest. In plowing time and in harvest you shall rest." ~ Exodus 34:21

They See Me

"Mama, I knit?"
"Sure, buddy. Come here."

We head over to my basket full of yarn and pick out a ball that is safe for little ones to pretend on. I hand him some knitting needles and he sits down in front of me, ready to create.

"Like this, mama?"
"Yes, buddy. That looks good!"
"I like the green sticks better. Green is my favorite color!"

Once she gets a listen as to what is going on, she is quickly by our sides, asking to join in.

"Mama, I want to knit too!"

"Come sit and grab some needles then."

"I know how to do this better than Caleb does. See, you twist it around like this!"

She sits, patiently, and concentrates on the yarn and the intertwining of the needles. I sit watching, amazed at her movements.

"Emma, how did you know how to knit?"

{I had yet to sit and actually show her how it was done.}

"I see you do it, mama."

"Emma do it better than me! Emma, teach me!"

"I can't teach you buddy, but mama can! Mama, will you teach him?"

"Sure, I can teach him. I would love to teach you both!"

"Mama, when I get big, I want to be a mama just like you!"

*be still my heart*

It amazed me how much she actually knew how to knit, just by watching me. If the simple act of sitting and knitting leaves an impression on them - a wanting to learn more about it - how much more of my life is leaving a positive reflection on their lives? Do they see Jesus in me? The most important aspect of my life that I want them to get; to learn? Am I speaking His name to them enough? Telling them of His goodness not only in our lives, but in the lives of so many?

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

I am the biggest influence in their lives right now at this young, tender age, and if I am not doing right, how can I expect them to? They pay attention to me, my actions, more than I realize, and I want those actions to be ones I am proud of them to mirror.  Kindness, love, patience, respect - these are character traits that I want making up my childrens personalities. But, are they part of my own? I need to check my own actions before teaching them and correcting them of their wrong actions. I want them to learn all they can from me - not from this world!

"Mama, you're the best mama in the whole world!"

"And you are the best daughter in the whole world!"

"I love you!"

"Oh honey, I love you too!"

They see me, all of me! And I want it to always be good!

Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me -- put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. ~ Philippians 4:9

Fresh Air

Spring has sprung here...at least for the past few days.

Even if the colder weather happens to return before Spring makes it official debut, we have been taking advantage of and enjoying the beautiful sunshine and warmer temps. Having the windows opened until the cool, night time air forces us to close them, while the sun shines a little longer each day - a favorite among the kids. Hearing the little ones laughing and chasing outside.  Yes, we are ready for it!

Since the weather has kept us busy lately, outdoors mostly, that is why this space has been a little quiet for the past week or so. And it just may continue on until next week since a special little girl has a big birthday coming up! {5 years old!!} Presents have been bought and made...just need to do a little wrapping. Guests have been invited; menu planned. Just a few final preparations to be made and we will be ready to party!

This is such a glorious time of year with new beginnings and celebrations - each day bringing us closer to meeting the newest little beauty to grace our presence this summer. She has definitely already made her presence known, however. Kicking and swimming around. I never remember Emma or Caleb being this active while in the womb. But it is such a joyous feeling, her playing around, as I like to call it. She is also excited for Spring and her fast approaching arrival.

Yes, this life I live is a blessed one. And I love taking the time to sit and reflect on just how wonderful it really is!

Has Spring-like weather arrived in your neck of the woods yet?

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. ~ Philippians 4:13

When A Princess Invites Buzz to a Tea!

What started out as an ordinary Monday morning filled with baskets of laundry and school books yet to be opened, quickly turned into a party fit for a princess (and prince).

She asked for a tea party and I couldn't say no. This little girl who is growing into a little lady, too quickly, right before my very eyes! I put the over-flowing laundry basket down and grab a piece of fabric from my ever growing pile and turn it into a stunning table cloth for her "guests". I pull out my better china tea cups and begin to set the table...transforming a small, wooden, table, into a table suitable for a Princess Tea!

::

Delicious fruit and yummy "tea" adorn the table while she rushes to get dressed for her party. Her guests arrive and I begin to serve. Tea is first, followed by the most delicious of all fruits in the land.

She comes down the stairs and into the "ball room" to join her guests dressed in the most prettiest of green dresses. Light conversation begins to fill the room and little girl dreams are whispered into the air.

Not long after the party begins, Knight Buzz arrives and she invites him to join them. Her guests are thrilled at his arrival. They enjoy his conversation and silliness. He is always sure to bring a smile to just about anyone's face!

They continue eating, sipping, and laughing, while listening to some friendly and fun music, which then leads to dancing and singing of their own.

Giggles erupt from the room and this mamas heart is about to explode!

Princess Emma's guests decide it is time to go and thank her for a lovely party. She tells them that they must do this again.

Buzz retires to his room for a nap, filled to the brim with laughter and good company. Sweet Princess Emma helps the waitress clean up after her guests and retells the most memorable parts of the party.

It was a lovely tea; Princess Emma thanks the waitress and heads off to do what little Princess girls do!

::

This mamas heart is overflowing with love and much joy this morning. Seeing my children play together in this way is what makes it all worth it. The memories made this morning are ones that are sure to last a lifetime.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, I am not sure, Lord, what I did to deserve these amazing children; this amazing life; but Thank You! I am forever grateful and truly, truly, blessed!!

*linking up at the Hip Homeschool Hop



For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. ~ Matthew 6:21