Blue Funk

Sloppy, amateurish updates on the adventures of Chelsea Football Club.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Chelsea 4-2 Blackburn Rovers

From Soccernet:
Chelsea threw away a two-goal first-half lead against Blackburn but stormed back to win 4-2 and now look unstoppable at the top of the Barclays Premiership.

Two goals inside the first 13 minutes from Didier Drogba and Frank Lampard had put Chelsea on course for a rout, but a brace from Craig Bellamy - his second courtesy of a dreadful error from Blues keeper Petr Cech - had levelled the score by the interval.

Lampard rescued the Blues with a superb second-half free-kick and a fourth came from Joe Cole.

It took them 10 minutes to take the lead. Blackburn failed to clear Lampard's corner and when the England midfielder returned the ball into the middle, Drogba steered a near-post header beyond Brad Friedel.

Two minutes later they increased their advantage from the penalty spot. Blackburn captain Andy Todd brought down John Terry and Riley pointed to the spot. Lampard converted the kick.

Blackburn got a lifeline in the 18th minute when Ricardo Carvalho brought down Zurab Khizanishvili in the penalty area and Craig Bellamy scored from the spot.

Blackburn equalised thanks to a dreadful error by Cech. The Czech international attempted to clear a backpass from Asier del Horno but only succeeded in slicing the ball high inside his own penalty area.

Shefki Kuqi beat Terry in the air and when the ball bounced free, Bellamy ran on to head the ball under the red-faced Cech.

Blackburn manager Mark Hughes was sent to the stands by referee Mike Riley for kicking the physio's bag on the touchline.

Tugay was shown the yellow card for hauling down Lampard and it was a costly error as the England midfielder fired home a 25-yard free-kick.

Cole made the game safe in the 74th minute when his 20-yard shot was deflected into the net by Khizanishvili.

• 'Mama mia!'

Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho hailed England's Frank Lampard as the best player in the world after his superb performance against Blackburn at Stamford Bridge.

'I don't see how he can improve because for me he is the best player in the world at the moment,' declared Mourinho. 'I don't know what the people who organise these world awards do at the weekends because only English people recognise what this player is.

'He was the best player in the Premiership last season and you have some great players in the world but they play one game a month. This player is top in every game.

'I would not change him for another player because he does everything. His defence is incredible, he can pass over a long distance, he can pass over short distances, he's professional, he can score goals over long distance, how can he improve? I just hope he carries on because he deserves to break the record for consecutive appearances in the Premier League.

'David James has the record and he is a keeper. That is completely different because a keeper has more chances to play.

'We played very well and the pace of the game was very high,' said Mourinho. 'We were better than them and they had one shot at goal.

'I told the players we had scored four goals in the first half and so we have to score more more goals but in the right end. I would have have been stupid to make changes at half-time so I didn't.'

Mourinho is so delighted with 10 wins and one draw from their first 11 games that he joked about experiencing the downside of the game with Chelsea one day when asked if his side were now back on track after their difficult week. 'Back on track? Ten wins and one draw - back on track? I hope to be here enough years to have the experience of my team being in a very difficult position. It will be bad for me but I will enjoy. Back on track? Mamma mia!'

Blackburn boss Mark Hughes responded by saying: 'We've had five players booked which reflects badly on us but it was never that kind of game. Maybe he was possibly shaped by the comments in the programme which I was a little bit upset about.

'I thought the things said in the programme were a little bit wrong. There were bits and pieces in the programme and their goalkeeper mentioned a challenge from Paul which I didn't feel needed to be highlighted in those terms. Referees are only human and maybe they read the programme.

'It's annoying because every time we play Arsenal or Chelsea, this stuff gets dragged up and we have to try to defend ourselves. But I thought our play in the first half was excellent. We started badly and went two down very early but fair play to our lads we came straight back and caused them problems.

'We felt we could get something from the game but getting sent to the stand doesn't make my job any easier.

'I'm a little bit confused as to why the referee felt it was necessary to send me to the stand. I wasn't happy with a couple of decisions. I jumped up to get the referee's attention but he ignored me so I kicked a bag.

'The fourth official, who I felt was a little bit pedantic all afternoon, decided it was time for me to sit in the stand. Apparently I ignored him three times.'

In other news, the North London derby ended 1-1 and Manure were thrashed 4-1 by Boro.

Friday, October 28, 2005

JM at the pre-Blackburn press conference, in response to insinuations that Chelsea could be bullied away from victory:
Everybody is crying that Chelsea keep winning and winning so I think that draw at Goodison Park makes everyone more happy. It gives people more hope and what everyone was waiting for. Everyone is waiting for Chelsea to lose a game and when we do there will be a holiday in the country. We are ready for that.
Then he walks out of the conference with typically scathing parting remarks:
I think you need me to say something that can stop the strange questions. Do you want me to say we are going to be Champions? Whatever happens in the next two or three matches, we are going to be Champions.That stops the strange questions. It doesn’t matter the result against Blackburn, it doesn’t matter the result against Man United. We will be Champions. Now you have a story to write.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Carling Cup: Chelsea 1-1 Charlton (4-5 on penalties)

Poor Huth. He was excellent against Everton, but messed up twice in this. Report from BBC:
Charlton caused a major surprise by dumping holders Chelsea out of the Carling Cup in a penalty shootout.

Bryan Hughes hit the winning spot-kick for the Addicks after Robert Huth had missed for the Premiership leaders.

John Terry had put Chelsea ahead in the first half with a header from an Arjen Robben corner, before Darren Bent levelled after a Huth mistake.

Frank Lampard went close with a drive and Jay Bothroyd forced Carlo Cuducini to save before penalties settled it.

Chelsea started the brighter of the teams and Paulo Ferreira forced Stephan Andersen to palm away before Hernan Crespo headed wastefully wide.

Darren Ambrose and Dennis Rommedahl lashed shots over the Chelsea bar as the visitors threatened but it was the home side who went ahead through Terry.

Just four minutes later, though, Huth failed to get sufficient contact on a header back to Carlo Cudicini and Bent took advantage to steal in and grab an unlikely equaliser.

Chelsea came out in dominant fashion after the interval and Terry was a fraction away from grabbing his second, a left-foot volley arching narrowly wide.

Soon after, Shaun Wright-Phillips drilled off target before Andersen pulled off a magnificent save to deny Eidur Gudjohnsen.

It was ebb and flow as Charlton came back strongly, substitute Bothroyd seeing a stinging shot palmed away by Cudicini for a corner.

Lampard was also introduced as a second-half replacement and he went close with two trademark long-range drives - one flying over and the other ending up in Andersen's arms.

But no one could muster a winner and penalties settled it, with Huth's effort saved by Andersen and everyone else scoring.

Chelsea: Cudicini, Paulo Ferreira, Terry, Huth, Bridge (Lampard 60), Wright-Phillips (Joe Cole 60), Essien, Geremi, Robben, Gudjohnsen, Crespo (Drogba 83).
Subs Not Used: Cech, Diarra.

Booked: Essien, Geremi, Terry.

Goals: Terry 41.

Charlton: Andersen, Young, Hreidarsson, El Karkouri, Powell, Rommedahl (Thomas 64), Ambrose (Bothroyd 73), Murphy (Kishishev 82), Holland, Hughes, Bent.
Subs Not Used: Kiely, Spector.

Booked: Hughes.

Goals: Bent 45.

Charlton win 5-4 on penalties.

Att: 42,198.

Ref: A Wiley (Staffordshire)

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Everton 1-1 Chelsea

Report from BBC:

Everton's dogged display ended Chelsea's 100 per cent start and eased the pressure on boss David Moyes.

The home side broke the deadlock when James Beattie scored from the spot after Tim Cahill had been fouled.

Frank Lampard levelled after the break but Everton held on with help from the assistant referee, who wrongly ruled out Didier Drogba's strike for offside.

Everton remain bottom of the table but the draw meant they avoided a new club record of seven consecutive defeats.

Chelsea hold a nine-point lead at the top of the Premiership despite being denied their 10th straight victory.

Moyes responded to his side's scoring problems by partnering the fit-again Beattie and Duncan Ferguson up front for the first time.

And though prompted by a training injury to Ricardo Carvalho, Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho responded by bringing Robert Huth in at centre-back, as well as restoring Petr Cech in goal.

Unsurprisingly, the visitors were immediately into their stride, Michael Essien blazing over and Nigel Martyn turning away Lampard's fierce drive - all inside five minutes.

Everton eventually settled and began to get to grips with the Premiership leaders.

They might even have taken the lead on 15 minutes when David Weir was left unmarked from a Mikel Arteta corner, but the defender could not keep his header away from Cech.

Beattie added to Chelsea's unease when, in the space of five minutes, he cut John Terry's nose in an aerial challenge and caught Claude Makelele on the head with a stray boot.

Then, after Shaun Wright-Phillips had brought down Cahill inside the box, the Everton striker drove home a penalty off the underside of the bar.

Chelsea scorer Frank Lampard
Lampard's equaliser failed to open the floodgates for Chelsea

Everton lost Nuno Valente to injury before the break and Chelsea then drew level when Lampard bent a wicked shot past Martyn at the start of the second half.

The visitors continued to enjoy plenty of possession, but Everton refused to capitulate.

They rode their luck when Drogba's strike was disallowed for a dubious offside decision against Eidur Gudjohnsen.

But Chelsea also escaped when the referee waved play on after a cross from substitute Marcus Bent hit Terry's arm in the penalty area.

Substitute Arjen Robben beefed up the Chelsea attack and saw one dipping effort fly just over the crossbar with Martyn beaten.

But the visitors could not break down Everton, who were given a huge ovation by the home fans at the final whistle.

Everton: Martyn, Hibbert, Yobo, Weir, Nuno Valente (Ferrari 45), Arteta, Cahill (Davies 70), Neville, Kilbane, Beattie, Ferguson (Bent 78).
Subs Not Used: Wright, McFadden.

Booked: Arteta, Ferrari.

Goals: Beattie 37 pen.

Chelsea: Cech, Gallas, Huth, Terry, Del Horno, Lampard, Makelele, Essien, Wright-Phillips (Gudjohnsen 58), Joe Cole (Robben 67), Drogba (Crespo 71).
Subs Not Used: Cudicini, Paulo Ferreira.

Booked: Drogba, Huth.

Goals: Lampard 50.

Att: 36,042

Ref: M Clattenburg (Co Durham)

Friday, October 21, 2005

Chelsea 4-0 Real Betis

From the BBC:

Didier Drogba put Chelsea ahead from Michael Essien's pass after 23 minutes.

Ricardo Carvalho added a second just before the break when goalkeeper Antonio Doblas dropped Frank Lampard's free-kick at his feet only a yard out.

Joe Cole struck a stunning third after 58 minutes and substitute Hernan Crespo headed home a perfect cross from Shaun Wright-Phillips five minutes later.

Carlo Cudicini won a surprise recall in goal in place of the rested Petr Cech, while Wright-Phillips was given a rare outing on the right flank.

And Cudicini had anxious early moments as Betis made a flying start, Claude Makelele clearing Juanito's header off the line from a Joaquin corner.

The dangerous Joaquin, who has long been linked with a move to Chelsea, then demonstrated his quality with a brilliant driven cross that narrowly evaded the incoming Betis attackers.

But Chelsea were easing their way into the game and took the lead through the in-form Drogba after 23 minutes.

Drogba had already missed a simple chance from Wright-Phillips' cross, but he made no mistake when he was sent clear by a clever reverse ball by Essien.

And Chelsea claimed a crucial two-goal cushion after 43 minutes when Carvalho took advantage of a gift from Doblas.

Lampard's free-kick was harmless, but Doblas was indecisive and dropped the ball at the feet of Carvalho almost on the goal-line, the Portuguese defender scoring easlly.

Drogba, who had been limping on several occasions in the first-half, was eventually replaced at half-time, giving Crespo an opportunity.

And Betis suffered a blow 10 minutes after the break when Miguel Angel stumbled under a perfectly fair challenge from Essien and appeared to injure his knee.

Chelsea were rampant and emphasised their superiority with two goals in five minutes to finish the game as a contest.

Cole struck the third after 58 minutes, taking another pass from the outstanding Essien before curling a right-foot finish past Doblas.

And Crespo added a stunning fourth, heading home a Wright-Phillips cross after he had been found by Lampard.

Chelsea: Cudicini, Ricardo Carvalho, Terry, Gallas, Del Horno, Makelele (Diarra 76), Wright-Phillips (Gudjohnsen 66), Lampard, Essien, Joe Cole, Drogba (Crespo 45).
Subs Not Used: Cech, Geremi, Paulo Ferreira, Huth.

Booked: Wright-Phillips, Gallas.

Goals: Drogba 24, Ricardo Carvalho 44, Joe Cole 59, Crespo 64.

Real Betis: Doblas, Melli, Juanito, Rivas, Oscar Lopez (Xisco 45), Varela, Miguel Angel (Assuncao 56),Rivera, Edu, Oliveira, Joaquin.
Subs Not Used: Contreras, Dani, Arzu, Capi, Nano.

Booked: Rivas, Varela, Joaquin, Xisco, Rivera.

Att: 36,457

Ref: Terje Hauge (Norway).

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Chelsea 5-1 Bolton

Robben and Duff injured, Crespo jet-lagged from internationals, so Cole and Wright-Philips get to start.

Report from BBC:
Chelsea produced a second-half surge of four goals in nine minutes to come back from a goal down and beat Bolton.

Stelios Giannakopoulos stunned the home side when he slotted in from six yards but Bolton had no answer as Chelsea burst into life after the break.

Didier Drogba's strike levelled matters before Frank Lampard's shot and free-kick, after Ricardo Gardner saw red for handball, put Chelsea ahead.

Drogba's shot and Eidur Gudjohnsen's cool finish completed the rout.

Bolton had barely had a touch of the ball before Chelsea had their first chance - Drogba angling a drive narrowly wide.

But the visitors shocked the Blues as they caught the home side's normally watertight defence off-guard.

El-Hadji Diouf slid a cross in between John Terry and Asier del Horno with Giannakopoulos applying the finishing touch by side-footing past keeper Petr Cech.

Chelsea's response saw Del Horno head just wide and Bolton scramble the ball away after a Joe Cole shot was saved by keeper Jussi Jaaskalainen.

But those two chances proved to be the home side's best in the first half as they struggled with the aerial threat posed by Bolton.

Giannakopoulos then went close as he latched onto a long-ball into the Chelsea box only for his shot to be blocked by Ricardo Carvalho while Speed thundered a half-volley against the crossbar for the visitors.

Midfielder Michael Essien summed up the Stamford Bridge side's frustrations with a dangerous tackle on Tal Ben Haim and was fortunate to escape with a yellow card.

There was more urgency about Chelsea's play after the break and their equaliser came when Drogba was quickest to react after Lampard's free-kick was parried by Jaaskalainen.

And Chelsea's powered into the lead when Lampard drove the ball home after Drogba had the presence of mind to produce a clever backheel as he was swarmed by defenders.

Bolton's misery was then compounded when Gardner was red-carded for handball and Lampard scored from the subsequent free-kick.

Drogba converted Lampard's corner with a well-timed near-post strike for his second and Chelsea were proving irresistible.

Gudjohnsen's goal only served to cap an emphatic comeback for the Premiership leaders.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Class post from Perillo on Chelsea Chat:
One thing that Liverpool have achieved (momentarily at least) is to encourage a wee grass root of interest in the game to poke its way through the sludge of disinterest that has slowly enveloped me in recent months**. No doubt I will trample it again as the thought of schlepping into the bully boy money grabbing hideous nightmare of a zone that is Fulham on matchday confronts me again.
But when those fekkin whining, over-rated darlings-of-the-press cyyuuntfaces wend their whiney way into town again, that little blade of grass will force its way through again.

Yesterday's result was so brutal to Liverpool in every way, from the absolutely perfect symmetry of the rout being begun by a penalty, to the re-furling of the ridiculous "THIS is the special one" (is it me or was it spelt "speshul won"?) that I was tempted, for a fleeting moment to have a little sympathy for Gerrard -I think for all his faults he is at least an honest player.

Was the phrase "football is a cruel sport" ever more applicable than it was yesterday? A week of cringemaking comment from the players and manager gave their already delusional fans the genuine notion that they and they alone were the team to blemish our record, to pull us down a peg or two, to take us on. They, and not Arsenal and Manure were the team to form the other half of whatever new dynasty we have given birth to. And we resoundingly, mercislessly and unequivocably flattened their ambition. And to cap it all, who were the players to do it to them? The much derided Joe Cole, the lumpen donkey Drogba, the forgotten Geremi...imagine if you will, that you are a Liverpool fan and how you felt the moment the ball eluded Robben and scurried across the area to Geremi: you realise the inevitability of what is to happen next..."oh no, it's going to be four, FOUR FOUR
FOUR
. At home. To
Chelsea
. After all that has been said. FOUR. FOUR goals at home. FOUR goals with the world watching. FOUR goals to the cockneyrussian scum. FOUR goals to the team who lack "dignity". FOUR goals to a team Rafa said we could,nay WOULD beat. Further, who Rafa said ONLY we could beat. FOUR FEEKIN GOALS!
And then Geremi smashes it nonchalantly into the roof of the net and all those Chelsea fans behind the goal erupt with less a cheer than a huge "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH". And even though it took only a few fractions of a second to realise the inevitable was about to happen and even though you were ready for it, when the net bulged and Reina sprawled uselessly across his goal, it still hurt like feck. It hurt that your only hope in this game would be that it wouldn't be FIVE. Imagine the lurch in the pit of your stomach?

I have been imagining it all day. Boy is it good.
CUUUUUUNTs.

**Does not apply to European competition

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Liverpool 1-4 Chelsea

Another intense "basketball" battle. Neither side with clear chances until Traore brings down Drogba in the box. Lampard squeezes the penalty in under Reina's body. Gets booked for shushing the Scouse fans (missiles fly at him as his teammates engulf him with their embraces).

Gerard equalises with a fierce shot from the right side of the box.

Was quiet after we scored, but now Anfield is rocking. Scousers surprisingly in tune.

Drogba skillfully (surprise, surprise) turns Hyppia with a stylish backheel, lays on for Duff, who slides it in the far corner. Beautifully worked goal.

Start of 2nd half: Pool throwing the sink at us. Unrelenting pummelling with long balls, all adequately dealt with by the best defence in the world.

Misdirected header by Hyppia leaves Drogba 1-1, but he takes it first time and misses.

Note: find out why Carvallho has been nicknamed 'Percy'.

On a Pool attack, Cole goes down theatrically in a tussle with Gerrard, as though he'd been elbowed (though videos show nothing). In the ensuing dispute, Drogba and Carragher are booked.

3-1. Joe Coooole again, after his two winners against them in the PL last season. Long ball over the top of the Pool defence, Drogba gets it, rounds the goalkeeper, lays it on for Cole, who taps it into an empty net.

Crouch fools Carvallho but blasts his shot over.

The tempo is much slower now. To our advantage.

Can hear the end of "One Man Went to Mow". Also "Chelsea Chelsea" and "We've Got the Special One".

Robben on for JC, Geremi on for Duff.
4-1. Wooo. Geremi taps in after more good work from Drogba and after Robben misses his chance. I swear this is sweeter than beating the Arse. How I despise the Scousers.

Unanimous opinion that Drogba was the MotM.