Shake off your woes

No awe inspiring quote here

Current weakness(es):
Kristen Stewart
William Beckett
Amber Run
Hippo Campus
Mansionair
The Maine
Jeon Soyeon
Kaneki Ken
Marius Von Hagen
Fye D. Flourite

Phyllis
01/08
Gauche

Yearns for:
Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland Shackle Bracelet
Gacha pulls
Gloomy skies
Head pats
Huskies
Indie bands
Grey eyes
Ribbons
Tap Tap Revenge

and the slow life.

Shouts

The Others

credits

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Icon: x o
Basecodes: Fragilelove[:

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Sunday, June 26, 2022, 4:00:00 AM

Ooh, I'm dead
Walking 'round but there's nothing in my head
Thought I was highest shelf
Guess I’m something else
I can see now I was misled

Ooh, is gone
Took a while to realise it went wrong
Barely can find my way in this awful age
Guess there's not much to depend on

I'm just waiting on you
Waiting on me
Waiting on something to come my way
Sometimes it's hard to know what I'm living for
But I come back again each day

'Cause I want more
More
More
And I'm almost gone
But still keep holding on

'Cause I want more
More
More
Never know if this will be the end
But all I know is I would do it again

Ooh, too bad
Thinking 'bout myself is making me sad
I barely feel the day
Still I’m here awake
In the off chance it might come back

I'm just waiting on you
Waiting on me
Waiting on something to come my way
These days it's hard to know what we're living for
But I come back again each day

'Cause I want more
More
More
And I'm almost gone
But still keep holding on

'Cause I want more
More
More
Never know if this will be the end
But all I know is I would do it again

So many days
I feel like I’m drowning
Looking for help but I still haven't found it
But I still wake up for the hope of what's in store

'Cause I want more
More
More
And even though I'm gone
I still keep holding on

'Cause I want more
I may be scared that I'm living it (more)
Can you see the way that I’m giving you
Even though I'm probably going back to the way I always am

I'm like can you tell me (I may be scared that I'm living it)
Which way to go (can you see the way that I’m giving you)
Been so lost for so long (even though I'm probably going back to)
I don't know (the way I always am)

I don't know anymore (I may be scared that I'm living it)
I don't know anymore (can you see the way that I’m giving you)
Trying to find my way (even though I'm probably going back to the way I always am)
'Cause I want more

* * *

People learn the most during their formative years.

But it took me decades into my existence to learn my self worth, and longer still to find my sense of identity.

As we unravel the mystery that is life, we realise how much we have been shaped and molded by the people around us - sometimes in not so positive ways.

And how much we are confined by who we are is stiffling.

* * *

There’s glasses on my ant.

Saturday, January 8, 2022, 1:53:00 AM

Fickle Game - Amber Run

I wanna be older

I wanna be stronger

I don’t wanna fall at the start

I wanna be quicker

I wanna get closer

Don’t wanna feel worlds apart

‘Cause I’m fast enough to get in trouble

But not fast enough to get away

And I’m old enough to know I’ll end up dying

But not young enough to forget again

It’s all a fickle game

Oh, life’s a fickle game we play

I wanna be older

I wanna be stronger

I don’t wanna fall at the start

I wanna be quicker

I wanna get closer

I don’t wanna be worlds apart

‘Cause I’m fast enough to get in trouble

But not fast enough to get away

And I’m old enough to know I’ll end up dying

But not young enough to forget again

It’s all a fickle game

Oh, life’s a fickle game we play

Fickle game

‘Cause I’m fast enough to get in trouble

But not fast enough to get away

And I’m old enough to know I’ll end up dying

But not young enough to forget again

I’m sick of fickle games

‘Cause life’s a fickle game we play

* * *

By 1900’s standards, my life should be done.

Although there’re still so many things I haven’t experienced yet.

But I’m exhausted most of the time.

I think I’ve lived enough.

* * *

Living like a chemist dog most days.

With heaps of procrastination.

I miss the eager wide eyed days.

And bodies that were stealthy.

* * *

“But for things when I could die, I’m like lmao finally.”

Monday, January 2, 2017, 9:33:00 PM

Sophia - Venus Demilo

Disappear
Disappear into the atmosphere
After all it's just the great unknown
The black hole in which we float

A year ago, she was someone else
A year ago, she still had her health
She threw it away in a box left beside the road

Who are you to think you understand
Just take these six words written on my hands
They read "Sophia, I'm yours forever, from tonight."

She knows the road from darkness back to light

Can't raise the dead and bring them back to life

She screamed "Sophia, I'm yours." and ran into the night

She screamed "Sophia, I'm yours forever, from tonight."

Don't tell me what to do because you don't know

I've tried to heal the past but you just can't grow

Come and tell me

Come on and tell me I'm wrong

After the war, her skies all turned to black

Carried her failures with her on her back

She screamed "Sophia, I'm yours forever, from tonight."

She laid to rest upon the hotel floor

I tried to help but I could help no more

I screamed "Sophia, she's yours." and ran into the night

I screamed "Sophia, she's yours." and ran away

Tonight, tonight, tonight

I screamed "Sophia, she's yours." and ran into the night

Read more about this song here (you won't regret it).

* * *

Because you were shiny and new.

And I was misled.

I would still very much like a time machine.

But not for that.

* * *

Now it just feels like I'm stuck in a suppressive-oppressive relationship.

Words I would have used:

Interesting

Attractive

Smart

Words I would use now:

Egoistic

Demanding

Manipulative

Pushy

Dense

Childish

* * *

Disappear into the atmosphere

Tuesday, October 27, 2015, 9:06:00 AM

The cause of many of my tears was you.

But i never once regretted them because they were worth it.

You are worth it.

But I'm not.

Not worth wasting your time over.

* * *

I feel like we're going through some sort of cycle.

That we'll always end up hurting each other.

How much do we have to push and pull before everything comes back together?

Maybe in the end, we'll only have memories to hold on to.

* * *

Naw, you don't like me.

You're just fascinated because I'm different.

Weird, in your terms.

And sooner or later, you'll just get tired of it, just like the rest.

Like I'm just a plaything.

YOUR plaything.

* * *

Once, is more than enough.

Monday, June 30, 2014, 10:09:00 AM

Your selfishness is overbearing.

What's the point of keeping me around just to belittle me and pretend that I don't exist?

Looking back, you were always moody, angry and practically asking us to fuck off.

What was the point of getting married to someone who doesn't care for you and treats you like a dog?

I would've been glad to be left on the shelf instead of being in this hellhole now.

At least I would've led a more fulfilling life, having all my time to myself and not ending up more fucked up.

And maybe have a shot at not being the weird one for a change.

I know our ideals are different but I am human, not a caged bird.

Rest assured that when this bird finally spreads its wings, you'll see a lot less of me.

And I'll bet I wouldn't be missed.

You'll have to find someone new to channel your fucked-up-ness on.

But of course, there's your ever so precious darling that you so desperately want to mother.

Apple of your eye, certainly.

Well we'll see if this apple was worth it when you left the other one to mutate.

You should think about your actions before pointing your fingers because oh, what terrible things others do to you!

Oh, and what double standards you have!

Do unto others what you want others to do unto you right?

Ever thought about that?

No?

Well, never too late to start, I suppose.

And don't come and try to tell me that you care because come on, we both know you don't.

Don't try to refute that because you told me so.

"I don't care", was what you said.

In my face.

Tell me how wrong am I now?

Tuesday, October 22, 2013, 1:37:00 AM

I wish I was born in a different era (ficticious or not).

An era where chivalry isn't dead would be good.

The Victorian era would be nice - elegant gowns and dances (lots of waltzing)!

The Steampunk era would've been awesome - I would tinker all day and came up with my own accessories.

The Cyberpunk era would be just fantastic - high tech gears all around.

And those neon lights!!!

And cool suits!

But then I would have to watch what I eat to keep in shape so...

Maybe not those suits.

But something leather.

Definitely something leather.

Sunday, April 14, 2013, 9:47:00 PM

State of Grace - Taylor Swift

I'm walking fast through the traffic lights
Busy streets and busy lives
And all we know
Is touch and go

We are alone with our changing minds
We fall in love 'til it hurts or bleeds or fades in time

And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same

You come around and the armour falls
Pierce the room like a cannonball
Now all we know
Is don't let go

We are alone, just you and me
Up in your room and our slates are clean
Just twin fire signs
Four blue eyes

So you were never a saint
And I've loved in shades of wrong
We learn to live with the pain
Mosaic broken hearts
But this love is brave and wild

And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same

This is a state of grace
This is the worthwhile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right

These are the hands of fate
You're my Achilles heel
This is the golden age of something good and right and real

And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same

And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same

This is a state of grace
This is the worthwhile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right

* * *

Well you can't blame me for being unfeeling when the time comes.

I think the problem is that I feel too much.

I'm not sorry that I can't meet your expectations.

After all, he's always more important than me, than anything or anyone else.

He can do no wrong in your eyes.

He'll be the most precious thing in your entire life.

But has it ever occurred to you that I exist as well?

That I have feelings and observational skills?

Sometimes I question my existence, my worth.

It seems to me that I am only here to do the things you don't want to, to be a go-to source when you wish to speak to something else rather than the wall and when things don't go well, I take the blame.

And to hand you coffee money as well.

What else is there?

I would really like to know why you keep me so heavily caged under lock and key when keeping me in the future was never your intention.

And STOP giving me the crap that you worry about me.

We all know I am past that phase in my life.

* * *

It saddens me to know that your opinion is as such.

But what am I to do since I am always sidelined and on the losing end?

I had to beat down my curious mind because come on, we both knew the answer to that unasked question.

It hung so thickly in the air that it suffocated me, clogged up my throat, squeezed the air out of my lungs and filled my eyes with sadness.

I shudder to think if anything untoward should happen to me.

Because you would probably leave me there to die.

What's the big fuss about?

Just another person who you never cared much about.

* * *

Don't you know that at the end of the day, you have no one to turn to or to depend on except yourself?

It's strange - living in such a forward world but yet your minds could be so backwards.

Our mental shields are all we have.

And in times like these, I'd keep them on.

You would have to protect yourself somehow.

The world is a scary place whether you're alone or not.

And it would be such a waste if I were to fall prey to illnesses of the mind caused by people who don't even know what I was worth.

It's a dog eat dog world out there.

* * *

I may be a flightless bird now, but in the not-so-distant future, I am going to fly further and live a more fullfilling life than any of you have never dreamed of.

That I promise you.

And as you look on, you'll wonder why you never found the courage to step out of all this madness.

In this life, all we do is wait.

The timer is counting down and I am getting restless and impatient.

Tell me, what is the use of staying when all they want is for you to do their bidding?

* * *

Nine, or get the fuck out.