Time for Pictures!

Anna traced the whole alphabet while waiting for Luke in the carpool line yesterday. She was VERY expressive throughout the process and just about bursted with pride after every letter!






- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Test blog on the meaning of life

I'm sitting in the carpool line waiting to pick up Luke, and I'm testing out this blog writing app. Since it's the free version, I can't upload pictures, so unfortunately, you will not be getting adorable iPhone pictures of Anna at this time. I do apologize for that, but if all goes well, they will be forthcoming.

I'm also not going to directly continue my thoughts from my last blog. I apologize for that, as well. I have actually written two (two!) drafts trying to follow up, and no matter what I do, my thoughts seem to come out too maudlin to publish. Instead, I will just sum up my reaction as a three step process: complete panic, an attempt at sustained self-distraction from life, and finally, exhilaration as I came to embrace the amazing adventure that God has for us.

(And yes, it turned out that my chute did work. In my mind, it opened when Greg got a great ministry job in Nashville working with a group that is very close to his heart. He starts in November.)

Instead, I'm going to hold forth on the meaning of life for a moment. Despite all the wonderful blessings that God has given to me this past month and a half (and they have been plentiful), I still managed to get in a funk yesterday. I was physically tired and mentally weary of this holding pattern we seem to be in. We can't buy a house in Nashville until ours sells or rents, and so for now, we are staying put while trying to get rid of it. And as of yesterday, I was over it. I was mentally ready to be settled and living a productive life, not biding my time wondering if we are leaving next week or next month. Here is how I put it to a close friend in an email yesterday:

"Because of this, I find myself looking so forward to Nashville. I can't wait to move and get settled in, even though I really should be dreading it b/c it means leaving all my friends and the life that I know here. Instead though, I see it as my way out of this "in-between" stage: right now, we are living in a city, but not really inhabiting it; going to a church, but not really being a part of it; sending our kids to school, but not really participating in it; dwelling in a house, but not thinking of it as our "home." I'm tired of the in-between."

Like I said, that was yesterday.

Yesterday, I did have a profound thought in this very same carpool line while I stared, defeated, out the window. The thought was this: The fullness of life is right here. You will never get more meaning out of life than what is available right now.

I pondered that the rest of the day, and this morning, I woke up knowing that it was true. I live a full and blessed life, not only because I live in a beautiful world (which I do) or have a wonderful family (which I do) or can count on a great group of friends (which I can) or enjoy good health (which I do). Instead, I have the fullness of life because I can fulfill the purposes for which I was created RIGHT NOW. I can glorify God right now. I can love my neighbor right now. If my life is on hold, it's only because I choose to put it on hold.

Today, I don't choose to put my life on hold. I choose to move forward. I choose to worship my God and love my family and serve those around me. And I choose to use my time well, starting with blogging in the carpool line!

Okay, let's see if this thing publishes. Here goes nothing...

My Skydiving Experience

So, this is a little unconventional, but I'm going to go for metaphor in my blog today.  Or maybe allegory.  I'm thinking it's in the style of "Masque of the Red Death," so I will leave you to your own literary analysis on the exact nature of the symbolism here.  Regardless, I have found that this is the best way for me to understand the tumultuous events of the past month.  In its own weird way, the images below describe my feelings more accurately than if I just told it to you straight.  Also, you will see that the narrative is from my perspective alone.  I don't want to tell anyone else's story or to speak of aspects that would not be beneficial to others.  So, without further ado, this is my version of my most recent experience:


I am not a skydiver.  It's just not in my DNA.  To me, while it looks fun, and while I even have some respect for the courage and faith it must take, it also looks a bit foolish.  And terrifying.  It's just not for me.

That's not to say that I don't like adventures.  In fact, I enjoy adventures very much.  I just want them to be somewhat safe.  And somewhat comfortable.  That's why I like to fly in planes.  Flying in planes takes faith, too, you know.  Flying in planes can be adventurous, especially for the faint of heart, like me.  For the past eight years, I've been flying on a great plane.  It was a little scary at first even to get on the plane, but that's just because I'm a chicken.  It turned out that my plane was very comfortable, and I enjoyed the journey very much.  I liked my fellow passengers, and I enjoyed our adventure together.  A few years ago, though, some things happened in my beloved plane.  A few of my fellow passengers decided to skydive.  They believed it was what they should do, and so they prepared to leap out of the plane on faith, and to go on to other great adventures.  I watched them with a mixture of wonder and bemusement.  I admired their resolve to take risks for their adventure, but at the same time, I thought they might be a little crazy.  Still, they were intriguing to watch.

Along that time, I began to read various books on skydiving.  These books challenged my level of comfort on the plane and made me wonder if this was the adventure that God had for me.  I spent a lot of time thinking about that and talking it over with others.  I began to wear a parachute around, just in case.  I didn't even know how to operate the parachute or if it would even work, but it seemed like the thing to do.  I began to sense that maybe my plane ride had become a little too comfortable, but honestly, I didn't know what to do about that.  First of all, I personally don't think it is wise to jump out of a plane for no reason, just for the general sake of adventure.  I think you need to have a purpose to skydiving, a destination in mind.  And I had no purpose or destination, so I didn't think skydiving was for me.  And secondly, I liked my plane.  I liked my comfy seat and my ability to roam freely about the cabin.  Thirdly, skydiving continued to terrify me.  Yes, the idea of an epic adventure was intriguing, but to recap, I am not a skydiver.  I am way too chicken to do anything that crazy.

So that's where I was, living out the tension between life in my comfortable plane and this seemingly ridiculous impulse to skydive.  I was torn between two worlds, and I was even trying to live as a skydiver while still in the plane.  It was a strange existence.  And then, very abruptly, something happened while I was walking around the plane.  The hatch opened.  That does not seem safe at all, and I was very terrified, but before I could even fully process what was happening, God (and that part is not a metaphor) threw me out of the plane!!!!!!


True story.

Tomorrow (or next week, or never--who can say?), I will write some of my reactions to being thrown out of an airplane by God.  (Hint:  it wasn't, "Thy will be done.").  In the meantime, if you have no idea what I'm talking about, I wouldn't stress over it.  The takeaway is that God is doing some big and scary and cool things in our life right now, and even though I wasn't ready for them, I'm pretty sure that I would have NEVER been ready for them.  Which is why He had to give me a push...

“If you want to be happy, then be.”

My daughter teaches me that.

My son gets it, too.

Daddy Daughter Date

Yesterday was busy, busy, busy, so we were all wanting some down time today.  Thus, while Luke was at school, Greg took Anna on a little date, so that I could do some therapeutic cleaning:).  Greg let Anna choose wherever she wanted to go, and she promptly chose Barnes and Noble.  It is a family favorite. 

On the way, Greg turned on the Veggie Tales cd, but Anna said, “We should listen to Daddy music.”  She changed her mind about four seconds later, but it was a sweet, if fleeting, thought.

At Barnes and Noble, Greg bought Anna a strawberries ‘n cream drink and a cookie. 

Afterwards they went to Target to get a little surprise for Luke, and then they passed a rack of Strawberry Shortcake DVD’s, which led to the following conversation:

Anna:  Look at those Strawberry books!

Greg:  No sweetie, those are DVD’s.

Anna:  Oh. [Pause]  You thought they were books.

Greg:  No, Anna.  You thought they were books.  I told you they were DVD’s.

Anna:  Oh.  But…you thought they were books for a little while.

Greg:  No, Anna, that was you.

Anna:  Well…we both thought they were books.

She cracks us up.  And yes, Greg ended up buying her a DVD.  They were on sale, after all:).

Another memorable moment on their date was Anna walking down the aisles of Target, belting out “Awesome God.” 

Now, they are home and enjoying lunch, while I am enjoying having my family (almost) together in a nice, clean house:).