2016 - A personal reflection

Photo by: Michael Juliano

I always thought of writing this blog as something others can relate, so this article will not collate all my past events for this year, but what I gain and learn from them, so it can be a beneficial lesson for you and me.

On Reading 

I've read 14 out of 20 books that I targeted this year, although I ended below my target, I am unapologetic about it. The practical reason for this under-achievement was time-constraint. My time is divided for family, day job, volunteer works, exercise, part time job, ICS and dozen more things. But this under achievement is not so bad, because books differ in length, if my reading this year is measured by pages, its surpassed pages I've read in 2015. My longest read this year was a lifetime's work of Adam Smith, The Wealth of Nation which is 1264 pages long and equal to 4 typical paperback books. It took me 8 months to finish.

Well, there is also a moral reason behind this under-achievement. As Noam Chomsky put it in his book, Power System (I'm paraphrasing): "that reading should be an intellectual exercise, we should think about it, go back and reflect and try not to forget what we read". So, after that encounter, I've changed my approach when it come to reading. Instead of racing to finish more books, I am more concern now on analyzing the content, to critically reflect on the ideas presented. 

Out of my 2016's book. 5 were on politics, 2 on economics, 4 novels, other 3 were on women and work, the future of human in space, and on the philosophy of existence. I'm thinking of writing my recommendation on reading for this year (I'll try). So, looking forward, I'll keep 20 books as my target for 2017.

On Family

My daughter became 1 year old this year. Flashing back, she grew up very fast. I watched her learn how to stand on her own feet, making her own baby steps, now she can run already. From just feeding on milk, now she already have her own teeth and can eat durian with me. Sometimes it feel magical watching a baby grow. Of course raising a child is hardwork, I learn how to shoulder the financial commitments, making time for her. During the early months, having a child made me appreciate a good sleep, something seems so precious during those period.

I also very grateful that my daughter and my wife sleeps very early. At night, when I boiled water to brew my coffee, they usually already fast asleep. This would give me extra time to flip through pages of my piling-to-read books, also gave me some space to type some of my thought.

On writing

I find it harder now to write in Malay. Not that I am not proud of my mother-tongue, or not patriotic, its just my surrounding was totally different now. Most of the book I read is in English, I also have to converse in English in the office, I speak Malay now only at home, or with my old friends. This changes has changed the language inside my head. I had thought in Malay previously, now they speak English. As I write what I think, its very hard to resist on writing in English.

On happiness 

I discovered 1 good book in my office's pantry, written by Michael Gill Gates. On his reflection, he once wrote of his French friend who take life on much more easier way. The idea that life is not a game or examination, you cannot fail in life. Its true sometimes bad thing happen in life, you lost your job, divorced, fail an exam, infected with disease, but these were not failure. Its just life in action, happening. Life has it twist and turns.

When I was a young kid, I remember once, I made a promise to myself. That I want to be a happy person, I will never get sad and will make sure that people around me always happy, I will help them to be happy. This is true, I don't make this up. Its a naive childhood dream, but as I getting older, I realized that maybe I should try make that dream of mine come true. I should try to be happy and not taking life very seriously. I was not competing against anyone, I have nothing to lose.

Final words

To be honest, I started writing this piece on the eve of the new year early this year. It should be published on 1st January as my new year resolution and reflection. But then, life happens. I was drown with work. I then realized its better that this piece come out incomplete, rather stuck in the draft folder forever. Although by society's standard this is very late, I'm still happy to announce that for 2017, my resolution is to be thankful and live happily.    

Your book is as important as your pillow when you want to sleep

Pic credit: Telegraph UK

Sometimes I do encounter with some question which a little more sound like this "Hey, how come you can read so may books, what is your secret?"

I love joking, so most of the time I will pick one joke out of my pocket to entertain the questioner, but in the end I did not answer the question. So, this piece of writing should be my attempt to answer the question, while trying my best to keep my bad lame joke inside my pocket.

First of all I want to disappoint all of you who read this piece of mine, that there is no secret. Every each of us learn how to read as early as our life begins. Almost all adult in our country can read. If you can read, than that is enough, you already have the key to read books, lot of books. The only thing that is lacking, is your will. So the hardest part is to pick one book and start reading. Which sound like a simple physical act, but strangely many of us reluctant to do so. How can you read lots of book if you don't start pick one and read?

The second fact I want to introduce to disappoint you further, is the fact that I am a normal, average slow-reader. I does not hold any super power to finish one book in an hour. It took me 8 months to finish Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations. But even if you are slow like me, you can still read many books, as long as you continue reading. Reading should not be a burden, it should be something fun to do. Like solving a puzzle, you can always pause for a while and continue at later time. As long as you continue, you will finally be turning the last page of the book.

Okay, now that you have already disappointed with my no-secret secret, I should offer you an apology and gave some tips to help you along the way. Its not really a tips, it is more about strange habit, which different people may accustomed to different reading habit of their own. While I don't usually share this publicly, I think its about time to embarrass myself for the benefit of a larger community. You may find some of this habit strange, its okay, do excuse me.

1. Give the book the same status as your handphone. Bring everywhere, even to a place which you know you can't actually read them. For example I always bring my book, when I went to kenduri, although I know that I will met people and compelled to chat with them. You will find that even at first you think you can never read them if you brought them, you will find that actually there is some small interval of time between the events that you actually can read 1 or 2 page.

2. Your book is as important as your pillow when you want to sleep. Read before you sleep. Make a habit to sleep with your book, and make a habit for your wife (or husband) to help remove a book on your face when you are asleep while reading it.

3. Never wait for anything without a book in your hand. I hate waiting, honestly. Be it at government offices, post office, bus stop, clinic or at restaurant waiting for a friend which always 'on the way' everytime you call them for their location. I even read in toilet when I have to wait for my processed food to come out of my body.

4. Every place should be equipped with book aside from fire extinguisher. I have books everywhere, in my home, office, even in my car. If I travel anywhere and suddenly I remember that I did not bring along the book which I currently read, there is always a spare in my car. You should also put one of your book in your wife's car, in case you switch your car with them regularly.

Of course there are others trick which can be utilized to read more. But for now this should be suffice. As long as you took the first step, pick a book and read. Then continue reading, you should be in good shape.

As Noam Chomsky once said "reading is a mental exercise". So reading should be like playing football for your mind as it is to your body. You may not remember everything you read, but you will find a lot of things, lots of them. So please. Read.

The RUU355 debacle - A Malaysian's perspective

I was asked by Mr. Lee, one of few colleague in my office which exchange joke with me everyday, he asked about one of the comment made by Marang MP which said that "non-muslim MPs should not interfere with Islamic matters". Personally, I don't like to talk about it, I am afraid that my view will upset some people. I wish on doing no harm. Before I elaborate further and put forward my case. I want to begin with a perspective, with which we should look into the matter. 

Malaysia is a multi-ethnic, multi-cultural, multi-religious country, which does not have a replicate models elsewhere. This unique-ness present us with many blessings, for example if Malaysia is one ethnic from the start, we may not have mamak stall or char kuey teow. Many fusion of the culture produce positive and tasty things. But there is also another side of the coin, the unique-ness also present us with flaws and drawbacks. Especially when we want to assert our culture or our thinking into other group, the hardliners (fundamentalist and chauvinist on each side)  are pushing into more polarization of opinions.

For one second, I think we should reflect how our forefathers have lay the bricks on building our nation. How they agreed to tolerate each other, agree to disagree, and forged a social contract which retain the stability. The Pribumi was given their special rights, and other races were given the permission to stay, to live, and to prosper. They were given citizenship and allowed to keep their culture, languages, religions, intact. This kind of tolerant were not seen in Indonesia, Thailand or even mainland China, where other races have to abandon their culture completely and assimilate with locals. They were not given rights to have special school with their own language. But in Malaysia its different, we are prospering in diversity and differences, and proudly I can say we thrived in doing so. We often compare ourself to other nations. Some want to derive our future from the US, they want to replicate US model here in Malaysia. Well, I suggest we read Howard Zinn's book on how Columbus killed the Arawaks, it was their history and it was ugly. By this, if we want to mold our future, we must do it ourself, our own way, we cannot derive it from others.

Of course it will be difficult. As Tun Dr. Mahathir once said "its impossible to please everybody". Technology also did not help in producing consensus among people. Henry Kissinger note this in his book, that the notion of truth is altered by technology. For instance Google altered your search according to your profile and search history, so two person searching the same subject will get different set of results. The rise of alternative media also in many ways distort our opinion, we have no control over informations today. This is of course have its good and bad side. For instance the trending news these past days is how to combat fake news on facebook. We have vast informations, mixed between right and wrong. The information feed into society today also were exposed to manipulations. So, people today have various informations, and various of truths, we don't have any universal truth. The result of this is polarization of views and very difficult to achieve consensus. It is okay actually to have multiple of views, and not agree on various things if the mindset is to live with each other, if we can respect each others choices. We can have division as long as we don't resort to violence and militarism. It is very critical to settle our disagreement using diplomacy.

Now, after having these 3 thick paragraphs on our perspective, lets look at the issue in our hand. The RUU335 concern about Shariah Court, so basically non-muslim is untouched by this change, because in our constitution the Shariah Court will only hear Muslim cases. It has been amended before in 1965 and 1984, nobody bat an eye during those days, and it hasn't become national polemic either. Why? First, they respect each others choices. Second, we don't have the kind of media that we have today. Our media today play on every issue, even restaurant menu can be a national debate today. Why? Ryan Holiday explain brilliantly in his book about the structure of the online media. He explain that many online media depend on page views, its their bread and butter. So they have to tailor their headline to be very provocative, nevermine if it is misleading, as long as people will click it. They does not concern over public anger or chaos, they don't have that accountability. If people went to riot, they does not care, leave it to the police, its other people job they say.

So, if we can have it on 1965 and 1984. I don't see the damage of it, if we have a revision today. I think its normal for any law to have revision, to be kept updated. If we can see things objectively, and does not fell to the game played by the media, this kind of thing should not be in the front page of every newspaper, everyday. I think there are much more important issue we have to be concern with. The multi-billion national scandal, the infrastructure, the free fall of the ringgit, can we have national debate on this kind of things?

Datuk Seri Mah Siew Keong said that he oppose the bill because "two legal system will tear the country apart". I don't know, I want to laugh or to cry. It seems like he does not reside in Malaysia for a very long time. The fact is the bill will not create two legal systems, we already have two legal systems in the first place since the country was born. If he want to abolish two legal systems, he should call Stephen Hawking and convince him to accelerate his research so that time travel is possible. Then he should travel back to the time when Shariah Court was founded and destroy it.

We have many things that are Islamic. We have Islamic banking system opposing conventional one. Nobody is talking that "two banking system will tear the country apart". We have Hong Leong Islamic Bank and Public Islamic Bank,  why don't Malaysiakini publish a story that  the bank should stop being Islamic to protect the non-muslim interest? Many non-muslim food manufacturer register for halal certification. Should we condemn them and asked them to go to their respective temples to get certification? It just absurd.

I lived in Malaysia for 22 years (minus 4 years in Russia), I think I can understand that racial issue played very well in our nation. Every issue in this country will be politicized and be seen on racial perspective. People like to discussed it, it served the online media very well, they got their clicks easily. It also served the politicians very well, they need an enemy, so they can be seen as doing a job to protect you. But, it fuel division and hatred. We demonized other groups, and perceived ours as sacred. Some people like to talk about Pribumi special right, they want to abolished them, we should have equal right they say. I can agree with that, but other races have to give up their right too to be fair, we should have one school system, we should use only one language, one religion, one culture, (no 1MDB please), lets become like Thailand or Indonesia, can we? Lets have an equal right for all.

See, its okay to embraced ideals, to envisaged the future our own way, to have dreams. But in the end we have wake up and face the reality, we lived in the imperfect world, we have to lose something to gain something. To live happily together we have to learn to be tolerant to each other, respect their choice and live with ours. If we strive to live in a perfect world, we will live our life unhappily. Lets embrace that Malaysia is perfectly imperfect in its diversity. Let us prosper together.

Power and Terror – Post 9/11 Talks and Interviews

Author: Noam Chomsky

Publisher: Little More, Tokyo 2002

I borrow the book from Penang Public Library in Georgetown. It was a small book, easy to read, and contain mainly interviews which Chomsky discuss the American exceptionalism and brutal repression to accomplish its foreign policy agenda, mostly to safeguard American control on resources and geopolitical power in the middle-east, Asia Pasific and Central America.

Noam Chomsky is a professor of linguist at MIT, but he was widely popular for his works in the political sphere. Where he along with Howard Zinn were a fierce critics of the US foreign policy. The book discussed in depth the role that the US has played in the international stage, rampaging small countries and using force to dominate the oil reserved.

Chomsky is a bit witty in his remarks, he mark Israel as thug operated by their master, the mafia don, which refers to the US. In his words “when the master speaks, the servant obeys”. This is in light of the optimism that people had when they see that the US now seems to have some consideration for the Palestinian cause. In fact it wasn’t, argued Chomsky. What happen was that the tanks in Palestinian soil seems to interrupt Dick Cheney’s mission. That is why the US politely asked Sharon to withdraw them.

Israel is the American base in the middle east, it supported the US policy and help them to be accomplished. This reason alone, made it valuable to US. For example in 1967 Israel crushed Arab Nationalist, this service is done to ensure that the US influence in the region remain firm, an independent and democratic society in the middle east will undermine US strategic interest.

Chomsky also elaborate on how the US consistently blocking the peace settlement, by vetoing the UN resolution. The Geneva Convention also can be seen as a perfect example on how the US is alone in international views. The forth Geneva Convention makes what US and Israel did to the occupied territory a war crime. In 2000 the UN security council voted that the Geneva Convention applies to Israeli Occupation, the vote was 14 to 0, but the US choose to abstained.

What the US used as a pretext to invade other countries seems paradoxical to Chomsky’s thought. They said that it is the ‘war on terror’. Saddam Hussein is a maniac which kills his own people with poison gas, that is why the US need to come and free the Iraqi from this brutal tyrant. The only missing fact is that the tyrant atrocities was done using military equipment supplied by the US. To end terror, Chomsky note “everyone’s worried about stoping terrorism. Well, there’s a really easy way: stop participating in it”.

Toward meaningful life

Picture credit to: flatrock.org.nz

This article is meant for those who are searching meaning in life. Maybe you already graduated from a prestigious institution, landed a good job. You earn good money, and can provide your family enough. But yet, there is a small spot inside your heart longing for meaning. All that you already have seems cannot satisfy the needs, it kept you awake at night. What was the thing that really missing?

You need a cause.

There are causes for everything, it is the reason for existence. For example, a pencil. The need for human to write cause the pencil into existence, this is the reason why we have pencils. But if, say that all people can write using keyboard and want to write using keyboard, then pencil will cease from existence. It cease because it no longer has a reason to exist.

Then come you. You are much more tricky than pencil. You have emotion, talent, means of communication, you can think. But fundamentally, it is the same.  You exist, thus you need a reason for existence. Or we shall term it as cause for human. Actually the need, something that you felt missing from your life is a psychological thing. To satisfy that psychological void, you should have a cause in life, one that does not related to material things. The cause that will satisfy your void is by giving service to other people.

Do you still remember the feeling when you give something without expecting something back? When you offer to help your teacher carry his/her book? When you stop your car and give way for a pedestrian to pass? When you help your junior solving math? When they accept your help, they smile, and thank you, suddenly wonderfulness fill your tummy. You felt better, you felt that people can rely on you. You feel great. It is by giving, and providing service to others that we will feel fulfilled.

One way of giving is enabling the less unfortunate part in our society to have better education. In other words, be a volunteer, teach the kids, our future generation. You will find that the void in you ceasing fast, you will find meaning when you look them in the eyes. You will overwhelm with happiness when you knew you contribute to their success. You feel more humane. You contribute to the betterment of the world. A great historian, Howard Zinn once said ‘I had a modest goal when I became a teacher. I wanted to change the World’, and that exactly what teacher does. They change the world.

Teaching is one part of it, that you might feel useful. If it does not suit you there are tones more way to give and contribute to society. You can donate blood, run a charitable event for the orphans, feed the homeless and etc. But bear in mind, it has to be a constant, otherwise the void will reappear.

So when you can’t sleep at night in the weekend after a busy tired week, you ended up staring at the ceiling. Ask the question, what was the one thing that I can give to my society. Think deeply. Once the sun shine the light in the next morning, change your midnight thought to action. Go out and contribute. Fill that void. Live meaningfully.