I need to document my journey of weight loss so far, because it
has been a powerful experience that has changed me more than just physically. I
mentioned in my last blog post that I've lost forty pounds so far since I
started the last of March. How have I done it? I want to put out there that I
understand the struggle many have, since I faced much of it too, and I don't
judge anyone who hasn't made the choices I have now, or cannot loose, no matter
how hard they work at it. I also realize that someday I may gain
weight again, (medically induced or whatever,) but the lifestyle I'm choosing
for myself will be better for me always, regardless of other influences.
Whatever happens, I'm better off, because I am choosing self-control over
indulgence. I am especially thankful that I have finally made choices I
needed to for most of my life, and that I'm being a good example of change and
even repentance for my children.
I joined WeightWatchers March 31st, which I had wanted to do for a
long time, but until then it wasn't possible. That day I made a commitment that
this new lifestyle I was taking on was going to be for the rest of my
life, permanently! It's been like a conversion process
really. The biggest thing I did was repent. Before this I pretty much ate
with reckless abandon. The "See-Food" diet. But no more. I recognized
that what I was doing was putting my physical cravings above what was right, with
excuses like, "But I just can't help myself!", or "It's just too
hard," or the worst, "I guess I love food more than I love being
fit." But it all felt true.
So it truly was a repentance process for me. Yesterday I listened
again to the talk from this last general conference by apostle, Elder D.
Todd Christofferson, The
Divine Gift of Repentance. Find
the text or audio here. As I listened to it I realized that the steps
of repentance he was outlining were the same I have taken for my commitment for
weight loss too. I knew that it had included repentance, but I didn't realize
how much until listening again to that talk. Let me quote a few of them that
apply:
"...repentance means striving
to change. "
"With repentance we can steadily improve in
our capacity to live the celestial law."(Or weight loss laws)
"...repentance means not only abandoning sin
but also committing to obedience. The Bible Dictionary states, “Repentance
comes to mean a turning of the heart and will to God, [as well as] a
renunciation of sin to which we are naturally inclined.”
"In the memorable expression of Professor
Noel Reynolds, 'The choice to repent is a choice to burn bridges in every
direction [having determined] to follow forever only one way,
the one path that leads to eternal life.'"
"...repentance requires a seriousness of
purpose and a willingness to persevere, even through pain."
"True repentance is not superficial. "
"Any pain entailed in repentance will always
be far less than the suffering required to satisfy justice for unresolved
transgression."
Elder Christofferson also said, "Real
repentance, real change may require repeated attempts, but there is something
refining and holy in such striving. " (SO true of weight loss attempts,
right?)
I have never believed in dieting-such a temporary
measure-somehow I believed that a different lifestyle was the correct
principle. I've been praying about a real commitment to change for years, but
until last spring I hadn't been truly ready for it. My daughter put it this
way, "Mom, you were finally ready."
WeightWatchers became my tool to learning what it took to live an
effective lifestyle. With their new PointsPlus system, I learned that certain
foods take more effort for the body to digest; those are the power foods.
Those foods (fruits, vegetables, whole grains, proteins), when eaten
in proper quantities make the body work harder at digesting and processing
them, as well as contributing to feeling satisfied quicker. With the new PointsPlus
program, all fruits, and most vegetables are FREE! That meant that if I was
hungry anytime during the day, I could pick up any of those and feel satisfied
again. Realistically, you should limit your intake of those too, so that you
don't overeat on those, but it's so much less likely. Besides, if you have
a choice between a piece of brownie and a banana, and you realize that
the brownie will use up 4-11+ points (depending on if it's carefully homemade
or a BYU mint brownie!) of your allowed 29 points, it's so much easier to pick
up that banana, and know that it's FREE, free, free! So WW's allowed points,
and points connected to food items taught me, little by little, what choices I
should reach for, and even taught my body to desire those over the other
options. I also learned to slow down while eating, and to listen to and
understand the signals my body was sending me.
The one element still missing in my plan here is exercise. Believe
it or not, I haven't done much of that. I know I still need to make the
commitment to that too - I still intend to - and I know that it would speed up
the process. I'm working on it. For many people exercise is an
essential element; I don't know why it hasn't been for me. At least
moving around is a lot easier and more fun already!
I have discovered that instead of being thrilled beyond belief
that it's finally happening, I'm more grateful and content. I'm feeling at
peace with myself. I know I'm doing the right thing. This is pleasing to the
Lord, as well as me, and those around me. I'm not so worried about my weight as
I am my well-being, and that includes my willingness to be obedient to that
which is right. I don't even have a specific "target weight," because
I know that my body will settle down into whatever is best for it if I keep up
the lifestyle. Interesting, huh?
I am especially thankful that I have finally made the choice
I needed to for most of my life, that I'm being a good example of change and
even repentance for my children. I'm worth it, and so is my family!
