Pepe The Great: 11/03/2009 - 16/10/2010

So tomorrow will be one week since the horrible incident

And I miss her so so so much with all my heart

I miss the way she walked, the way she smelt, the way she loved having her belly rubbed

The way she always did that crazy victory breakdance after she pooped

The way she’d stretch and then wipe her mouth on the lounge and in recent months, her towel after she was done eating

The way she used to comfort me when I was down

The way she loved to go out, but always wanted to go home straight away

How she loved raw mango

How she used to follow me so closely like my shadow

How she taught herself to stand up as though to ask to be picked up

How she loved to bask in the sun in the backyard

She was curious and playful but never ever naughty

And whenever she sensed that she was in danger, she’d run and hide under the dining table

And whenever she sensed that we were in danger, she’d run to our aid – or at least to stickybeak!

She was such a tame dog, barely ever barked, she was timid, and shy and kind

When she was bullied by visiting kids or babies, she never growled or bit – she used to run to her corner and cry

She had asthma attacks which used to scare us so badly, I was always scared I’d lose her and was so protective of her

I miss how we would occasionally argue when she was sulky – I’d say something to her and she used to whimper back at me

She used to climb on mum's shoulder on the couch and make noises as though she was conversing

I miss how she hung out with me every morning without fail – how she occasionally slept in and how I watched her jolt awake and run to me when she realised…

And on days when I was late for work and forgot to go get her, she’d stick her head in my door as though to say “Hello!!?! Remember me?”

And when I came home late, she’d always make an effort to greet me, even though at times she barely made it to the door before collapsing into deep sleep

How she waited patiently to use the bathroom when there was someone in the shower, and waited patiently in the morning for her food

She caught cockroaches and lined them up for my mum

And she loved the colour red, her favourite toy, her favourite jumper were both red

And how she used to be so protective over them, guarding them with both her paws and her head

I remember when she discovered lychees and used to pinch them from the offerings alter and peel them then eat them

She loved fruit and often sniffed the fruit at the alter. Fruit and vegies were her favourite and when she couldn’t finish them, she’d hide them under her mattress for later!

From day one, she hated photos

From day one she often took off her jumper on her own! In the Winter time, we’d put a baby bonds singlet on her under her jumper and she looked so cute

Her first haircut was a fail, they put bows on her and she hated it, and left her with no hair and we couldn’t recognise her, when they dropped her off mum said "that's not my dog" but it was and she was an ugly cute for awhile, we still loved her heaps... the second time I told them to make sure they left it a bit longer and the third time I cut her fur myself! Because we couldn’t bear to have her away from us for so long. She was so good and still.

She was such a clown and a dag, she was quirky and she was ours!!

When she was spayed at 6 months, the vet doped her up so much that she was high for days, she was such a little dog and she mozied around for days, when we went to visit her after her operation, she was so drugged out she couldn't lift her head, mum and i cried to see her like that and amidst all that, she wagged her tail violently as though to tell us it was all ok...

on her deathbed, she tried to get up to greet me when she saw me, but her neck was broken and too far gone, i wish i could have protected her, my baby, my best mate...

We loved her so much, she always managed to make us smile even amidst pain

She was our sunshine, and will remain so forever in our hearts.

Trevs

scuse the absence but its been a very busy year for me, in between wedding planning, home preps and indulging in my culinary vices, i've also been trying to kick some goals in my career ...and in real life (picking up soccer again)

i've been meaning to blog about my mate oliver's book launch but felt that it deserved much much more justice than i could give it in the past month so that will definitely be another post for another day but that doesnt take away from his awesomeness

on the topic of awesomeness, we had the fortune of being invited to trevor's birthday - quite a good concept actually, it was held at an artspace in the city and the concept was rather than buying a present, to contribute to a donation to amnesty international instead (yay, my charity of choice since uni days) there's just something about human rights that just pulls at my heart strings

so anyway, the venue:



'HELLO' and the birthday boy himself:



Hello, actually i shouldn't call this eligible bachelor that, his name is Wei (geddit?)...anyway, being young men full of innovative ideas... Wei had an awesome idea of his own, everyone attending the party had to wear these uber cool nerd glasses and pose for a photo....

mine:



swati:



josh:



and.... danny:



hahahahahhahahaa

i love love love the fisheye function hahahaha

sorry danny and happy birthday trev

oh, oh... does anyone recognise this dude?



met him at the party and was told that he won some singaporean reality tv show competition... i wasnt sure but took a photo with him anyway just incase he was famous haha

someone else for a day...

beccs movie rating - 3/5

as a child, car rides were a treat, mcdonalds and kfc were eaten annually
the closest i came to going outside my suburb, was a 10 minute busride to the next suburb

every outing was savoured

i made sure that i remembered every detail i could to re-live it in my head on the days when i didn't feel like making games up, didn't feel like sewing clothes for barbies i never owned, didn't feel like singing on my balcony imagining that i was some famous rockstar...

i remember on those trips... i used to love going home at about dinner time

i loved peering through half drawn curtains and seeing people's dining rooms despite feeling motion sickness

on the rare occassion i would see families sitting, eating, laughing, sharing a meal and i used to wonder - what kind of lives do these people live? what did they do for a living? what would it be like to be them for a day?

i went to see "new york i love you" last night at cinema paris at fox studios and for some reason the movie stirred that memory

all these different characters mish mashed and entertwined in different stories of their lives and love

with an all-star cast - natalie portman, ethan hawke, maggie q, shi qi, bradley cooper, andy garcia, that summer girl from the OC....rachel bilson, blake lively, orlando bloom, robyn wright.... (the rest can be found here) the film was very interesting and thought provoking in some ways - but not for everyone which probably explains why its not shown at the commercial cinemas (not to my knowlege anyway)

la brasserie

beccs food rating - 1.5/5 (saved by the pink grapefruit macaroon)

We had the fortune of choosing a restaurant to attend last weekend as we had been given some vouchers

After much deliberation we decided on the French genre and we decided on La Brasserie on Crown St in Darlinghurst



Now, I am not going to say too much about it, rather on this occasion, I’ll let the pictures do the talking

My entrée was a Souffle with fromage and walnuts



Danny’s was escargots mmmmmm



for mains I had some kind of cod fish



and Danny had overdone steak – (weoops)



for dessert I had crème brulee



and Danny had abso-fricken-delicious pink grapefruit macaroon!!!



we ate in silence for most of our meal, occasionally swapping dishes, or murmuring a few words, meanwhile the first date couple next to us yabbered on and on and on and on and on…. I felt like I knew them so well after our meal…I guess when you run out of things to say to each other, you start eavesdropping haha

Appreciating Chocolate

I’ve been a busy bee of late and I’ve much to blog about

But first up, my ‘Chocolate Connoisseurs Appreciation Course’





Let me tell you, this is a very good way to go off chocolate

Why? 2.5hrs of chocolate ‘connoisseuring’ can make even the most loyal of chocolate lovers feel abit…ill?

Particularly if you spend the majority of your time “appreciating” dark dark chocolate like this 99% one:



Now I may sound like I didn’t enjoy myself, believe me I did

The speaker, Matt was very nice and even made us each a hot chocolate when we arrived




Later we tried our hand at making our own hot chocolates, the ‘proper’ way – mine looked alright, but turned out to be kind of yuck…. Much to my delight, Danny’s was worse






Unfortunately the only pictures I have of me are ones of the back of my head – I’ve found this to be a recurring theme actually and attribute it to our humble beginnings and him falling in love with, yes, the back of my head. WEIRDO! Haha but I digress….

So anyway, being an after work thing I went in and out of consciousness but all in all found the course quite educational. We learnt so much about the origins of chocolate and how chocolate in its edible form came about, you know, trivia you can talk about when placed in awkward situations where you have to make conversation

Ms T's at Bondi Icebergs

beccs food rating: 4.5/5

we had the pleasure of sharing Ms T's birthday this year at the acclaimed Bondi Icebergs



Ms T and D



Being located at one of sydney's most famous beaches, it took us about 45 minutes to find parking, but it was all worth it because the food was absolutely devine! i'm still hankering for it now!

I couldn't decide between the spaghetti with clams or the trout rissotto - so i ordered both



Spaghetti with clams



Trout rissotto

and i dont for a minute regret it!!

D ordered the rib-eye steak



D's rib eye

D said that it was one of the best steaks he has ever had - and he loves him his steaks... Ms T ordered the same thing (dont underestimate her eating capacity by the looks of her size - she could eat almost anyone under the table!)and also said it was the best steak she has ever had... and thats a big call coming from them!

I tried some and i must admit, it was cooked to perfection, when it first came out i said it looked like charcoal and expected it to be dry and gamy...how wrong was i, it was the most succulent melt in your mouth steak ever! so YUMMY!!!

and for dessert, ofcourse we had to have the panna cotta, i LOVE panna cotta mMmMmm



Panna Cotta mMmMm

and then for our second dessert, we headed back to Ms T's to watch the Australia vs Ghana game and had Lindt chocolate cake! I LOVE LINDT!!

me and my ixus!

ok. a few weeks ago danny and i were fortunate enough to be invited to the BMW 5 series launch... it being a swanky cocktail affair with a 4 course meal catered by doltone house and a jazz band, we felt it inappropriate to lug the ginormous DSLR to the occasion. that night i wished that i had a camera small enough and sharp enough to capture our dally into an enchanting and luxurious world we probably wont experience very often in our lifetime...

forward a few weeks, in come the canon ixus 130 and my wish came true (i swear i am not being paid for this! that's wish 2 haha)

i don't profess to know much about cameras at all, ive always gone with looks and have always prefrred the vintage camera look akin to the canon G9, G10, G11 or the Olympus Pen until this little pocket rocket walked into my life!



image taken from http://www.cnet.com.au

Small enough to be discreet, it has novelty functions that I absolutely LOVE that most be probably wont really care about..

miniature function:



didn't really turn out here because i wasn't far away enough, great for scenery pics to make things look like toys... LOVE!!

nostalgic:



fisheye:



colour accent:



There are heaps more functions but these were the reasons why we ended up choosing this camera over all the other super cool ones, that and because it was a mad bargain!

sometimes lifechanging moments and milestones can bring out the best or worst in people, people you care about, people who you thought cared back...
sometimes it can bring about the best and worst in the people surrounding the situation and it can bring about the best worst of someone...
and it can be a real eye opener as to the people who genuinely care about you and those who keep it at merely words
some people end up delivering cutting words and ruthless nothings
some people disappear
some are there because they're obliged
some just don't care and accuse you of being an impediment to their lifestyle...

and then there is that cluster, a handful of people who get excited for you, feel your happiness, your pain, listen to you talk crap and mope with you when you are melancholy, who are just there unconditionally...

im thankful for you

beggars

ive been tossing up the idea of wearing a cheongsam/qi pao for the tea ceremony on the wedding day, i figured if im going to be doing the whole traditional thing, maybe i should also look the part?

but as they say, "the qipao chooses the wearer" and not everyone looks good in one

so curiosity got the better of me yesterday as i was strolling through market city in chinatown with danny when a particular shop caught my eye

i had always had this sneaking suspicion that id look like a cart pushing yum cha lady drowning in a qipao...

so with some encouragement from danny, i decided to go in

there was a man and a lady minding the shop

i asked the lady at the counter whether they sold cheongsams and whether i could try it on

the lady wanted to know with great frustration for some reason, what colour i wanted. So not knowing and not caring at that stage, i shrugged and said "red?" whilst wondering why she was being so pushy about it

my size apparently wasnt available so the man shoved me what looked like the equivalent of a size large and told me it'd fit and made me try it on

so i obliged thinking maybe im much bigger than i think i am

but just as i had suspected it was humungous on me all the while the man kept insisting that it fitted me perfectly, i disagreed and after realising that i wasnt buying his argument, he rummaged through what seemed like ten million squashed packages on his shelf, and came up with a smaller longer one

i tried that on and it literally "fit.like.a.glove" so much so that when i was told to climb on the stool to look at the mirror, i couldn't!! it was so tight that i could barely walk in it, again he told me that the dress was perfect yada yada and was pushing me to buy it

i didn't think so, so after i changed out of it, i told him that i wanted to bring my mother back to judge before i made a purchase. my mum is a better judge of these things than me, and certainly better than that pushy old man!!!

i thought that was reasonable? why would i buy something that i didn't think fit me?

to which he responded that i had creased it and that we should dry clean it for him!!!! OMGWTH??!! use me as an excuse to get free dry cleaning for an already creased dress!!??!! i was certain at that point that being folded 5 times and stored in the packaging on his crammed shelf had creased it, NOT ME! WHAT A RORT!

....we chose to be civilised and ignored that comment (and we were toO gobsmacked) and continued out the store wanting to get out of the horrible place asap... maybe it was our lack of response that pee'd him off so on our way out he said to the lady very loudly in chinese;

"THEY TURNED OUT TO BE BEGGARS"

OMGWTH??????

so the fact that he couldn't rort us made us beggars?
or the fact that i resisted his pushing me into buying an ill fitting dress?

hahah so mature, he calls people names when he can't make a sale hahahahahahahaha now THAT'S a tosser!!

frames

i really really need a good camera and a holiday

sometimes when im walking along the street, i actually see things in frames

especially in quirky quaint neighbourhoods, but also just on the street in any random place.... i see colours or patterns and i want to capture them and keep them and my memory and my head wont do these frames any justice

and it gets exceedingly frustrating

my current point and shoot just wont do anything any justice

on the odd occassion i try, but then the colours, the lines they're all wrong

so now i dont bother anymore

as for the holiday i just need one. but i want a good camera that would capture these frames on holidays otherwise it'd just be a complete waste

walls and windows

its almost been too long...wait... it HAS been too long since the last post

and prior to that i've realised, were all fairly depressing posts

and i guess that's why i stopped.

i wanted to stop being that dark and discontent person

there are different reasons for why people choose to blog and i initially chose to blog to unleash the raw emotions that i had felt at any particular point in time...i had always vowed to write not for an audience, but to write uninhibitedly and unabashedly...for myself...it just got too personal

and perhaps somewhere along the way i sort of got lost in the blog furore and lost myself immersing in the commercialism of it all ...i just got very lost

today danny asked me why i had stopped blogging

and thats what i told him... perhaps now that i am older i am better able to appreciate my privacy, i am reluctant to blog about things that are real, that are close to home

my solitude, now my beloved, my personal space... my freedom....mine

big rowdy groups no longer fascinate but are a source of distraction and annoyance
contrarily, i prefer the warmth and love of a few close clusters that i hold dearly to my heart

maybe ive changed, maybe i simply lost interest, maybe i just felt too pressured to share and share too much

having grown accustomed to the walls ive carefully placed and choreographed and painted and decorated over the past few years to shelter my privacy from prying eyes and my emotions from the anarchy of judgments

i now re-welcome the blog world with a little reluctance hoping that my love of writing will supercede the hesitance...

with the hope that i might be courageous enough to build some small windows

one full round

one full round and back at one and eight
i thought i liked the structure that had at long last come about
one full round and im back at the beginning
except that now im older
and theres no time to be idealistic and fickle
one full round and i am as lost as ever
still searching for that missing peice
that would make everything... meaningful

U2 3D

had a b+c day yesterday and ended up going to the U2 concert ....almost

....the next best thing anyway, we watched it 3D at Imax and it was awesome

much RESTEPC to them, i love U2 and the things they stand for, to see a band so famous, use the power of their lyrics to try to right all the wrongs in the world was so ...empowering

CO-EXIST

RESPECT!

The Universal Declaration of Human Rights Read it, learn it, immerse in it

noone told me

noone told me it'd be this hard

this hard to cope with even the most mundane of things

to live a life thats beyond my control

to live a life not of my choice

but one thats pleasing to others around me

i feel so defeated

and everything seems so pointless

what am i even doing here? why do i even bother?

i feel so delapidated

nothing will ever change

when can i stop trudging?

i cant remember when

ive been feeling rather melancholic and nostalgic of late
nostalgic for those yonder days that i thought were so difficult at the time

if only i had known back then how much nothing really mattered

when did life and things get so serious, so heavy, so suffocatingly still and noisy all in the same breath?

so nauseatingly tiresome?

i cant remember when a laugh was a laugh and a smile beamed from within?
when people meant what they said and said what they meant and things were just...straight forward.... i cant remember when

a time when i had hope and no hatred within

when all things were bright and rainbows and lollypops and light

when it was all innocent, no struggle no fight

no tears no fears no dramas no troubles

no ulterior motive no games no pain

my pepe and i

the only dog in the whole wide wide world im not afraid of:



look at that face that could melt butter, she always has this 'poor me' look on her face LOL

those who know me know that i have this intense fear of dogs, large or small but my pepe is different, she doesnt even bark! hehe

melbourne and great ocean road

okay,there's been a lull on the blogging scene, well MY blogging scene anyway and the reason was that my net was capped yet again, ofcourse. Such are the woes that come with having siblings

so last weekend we took a bit of a breather and headed to Melbourne, partly on account of Tiger Airway's discount airfares... having been on a fair few trips before, and Melbourne being almost my second home growing up... i was a little startled at my anxiousness as the day dawned.

the tickets were booked months and months and months ago and it seemed like the day would never arrive, even on the eve of the trip i was sitting at home in anticipation... on a friday night... for fear of sleeping in and missing the morning's flight!

the trip turned out to be all that it was meant to be and more - it was a trip filled with the exploration of nooks and crannies and suburbs and one which ticked the great ocean road drive off the list of things to do before we die.

so it seems that the end of the days of mindless and mind boggling shopping is nigh, although fun occassionally, it is no longer number 1 on my list of melbourne things to do, rather it seems we've traded it in for the quiet joy of stumbling across uniqueness and flair.

our destinations in the city were quirky yet fun all in the same breath, brunch at tramstop MART 130, strolling in st kilda and fitzroy, dinner at Fifteen, chilling out at Section 8 (nestled in a laneway in chinatown and seriously reminded me of rumble in the brox)after being failed by the docklands (absolutely nothing open at night). my flinders lane friends didnt let me down, my obligatory belgian waffle and lord of the fries a priority on the last day.

great ocean road turned out to be the breath taking drive it was cracked up to be, we sighted a whale, a koala and drove with roaming cows. we drove by the shore and through rainforests and twisties lined by great big tall gum trees...

we stayed at the cutest little abode that looked like boathouses in apollo bay and even slept in the eye of a huge storm which threatened to blow the house down and us away!

and the 12 apostles, they were simply devine!! my heart skipped a beat upon sight.

Many places i go to, i think 'this is great' but if asked whether i'd come back i'd say "probably not" but this place, i think ill be back again one day...

and although i say this every single time i come back - it was my best melbourne trip to date



incase you're wondering why this was the picture of choice for this entry...no reason really other than im still hankering after this butternut pumpkin and bacon rissotto i ordered for my entree at fifteen..soooo yummy!!

one man's trash is another man's treasure

so i was strolling around at the shops the other day and to my delight stumbled across these...



vintage story book cut out key rings!!

how awesome are they?! they remind me of my childhood and all those old books with the gold binding...

i would definitely rate these in line the vintage lace keyring danny got for me from portobello market all those years ago!! they make me so happy wheeeeeeeee! hehehe

chatter

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah-hahhahahahahaaa!!

i can not believe this, i've been dwelling all day and feeling a little glum and who would have thought my very own blog would cheer me up! haha

so it would seem that I do have *some* readers afterall and alas! ones that comment haha (thanks KY ,claire, inter alia)but silly me in my techonological ineptness didnt realise that i had to actually moderate the comments and click publish! so i had comments dating back as far as december 2007 which i hadn't read and never knew existed! i had always just assumed that they were those random comments left by spamming thingos...oh joy! nuffnung dollars here i come!! hahahahaha ok maybe not quite yet...

so anyway i was a little glum today because i realised i lost my gucci heart bracelet, my first and just about only splurge on myself way back when...after a year of working a "proper" job. i think im more bummed about the fact that it sort of concreted to me that i don't deserve to have nice things...not even my mandarin picking day trip to wiseman's ferry nor all the chocolate i subsequently bought at the supermarket cheered me up! darGhhh!

but im not all materialistic haha...im actually really sad about other news too... like how megan's off to the UK for a couple of years on wednesday and vien and co. moved to NZ on saturday... i feel like im slowly losing my friends to other countries! i'll miss you guys soooooOooOo much!

of being great

i am going to be a somebody one day.

i've been pondering quite a lot of late... searching for that something that will fill that gaping void that lingers and has been lingering for all these years

i want to be great and i want to change the world
i want to be inspired and to be able to inspire

i want to reach for the stars
and land on the moon... to quote a motivational line given to me once upon a time by a dear friend in my youth

...the same youth and simplistic naivety that saw me dream dreams i've not yet achieved, so many dreams ... where and how to begin?

its not too late that little voice in my head whimpers, but what is it that im meant to do? what is this greatness that i will acheive?

i was never created to be mediocre, i believed it so badly back then... so why am i now mediocre?

how do i change? how do i change it? how do i make it better? ...the world. and what exactly IS better?

the photo

So some time around this time last year i took a short trip to mother England, and Danny recommended a visit the A&F store around the Saville Row St area- so on my last full day there, i decided that i should make the trek just before closing time...

As promised by Danny, the place was filled with beautiful people and right smack bang at the entrance was this male model and a polaroid photographer. I decided to jump in for a picture...



my brother came into my room the other day and glanced this photo and turned to me and said "when did you get a picture with SEAL?"

uhhh...

cant wait till tomorrow, tomorrow is when i get my net back hopefully and tomorrow is when i can blog properly, hopefully even with pictures!

anyway, i just got back from krav maga and by golly i have never felt such pain!! my knuckles are all raw, my joints are aching and im bruised all over! at one point during class i thought i was going to pass out... when i had to hold the punching thing for danny, my gawd!! i think i screamed out that i had never felt such pain haha

but despite all that pain, you know what? i really like my krav classes! they're really good, i not only learn really effective techniques but i really get a good workout too.

by far better than hapkido and karate i rekon, for me anyway, because its not so defined and regimented and there aren't so many rules...there is no master, no sensei, just real world fighting - i love it! it just all makes sense... cant wait till my next class!

someone hold back the hands of time for me to catch myself

do you ever get that feeling as though you're running out of time... out of time to do things, out of time to appreciate things and time to spend with your loved ones before things change as they usually do ... or just that feeling like there's no more time..

sometimes i wish there were more hours in a day just so that i can do everything i set out to do... lately, i have been so busy i haven't even had a chance to stop... and just breathe... ive been ploughing through my weeks, the weeknights get busier and busier as social appointments which couldn't be fit into the miniscule two days we get for the weekend gets pushed back into the week...and then the weekends come and they just fly by and the next thing i know im waking up to the annoying sound of all my alarms and then its monday already.. and the story goes, i drive to work and all the way i wonder through my blurry eyes where on earth did all the time go?

i watch my friend's children as they grow and change into their own little persons with their own characters and quirks, i think back to highschool and the decade that had passed since...and then i look within.. and im still just me...

getting on, ploughing through and nothing's changed.

contradictions

contrary that what many may think, i think alot, i think too much, i think myself into quiet noisy frenzies. at times i try to make quiet the ruckus within. but even in the stillness lies a noise. it begs for more. more knowledge more noise just more. more than this more than mediocrity. in ways contradicting it yearns for a normality that encompasses more. quiet quite quite discontent.

the bain of my existence!

OMG I am so over my computer and the internet not working properly!

Just when I thought everything was all fixed, something else goes wrong!

Why won’t it connect? I only just got a new service provider… shouldn’t I be getting some service? Actually WHY wont it even shut down??

I know computers aren’t exactly my forte, however I do believe that one has the right to reasonably EXPECT things in today’s day and age …to fulfill its function!

So I boycotted this thing called the computer for awhile, well I think it boycotted me actually, with no connection in my changeover of service providers and in between it being spasmodically temperamental, I just ceased to touch this mechanism I love-hatingly call my computer…

…and I was only just getting to know and growing to like it again after such a long absence… in fact just the other night, I even stayed up, on a week night, lo and behold… surfing the net and …enjoying it!

So I’m now sitting here puzzled as to what happened? What went so wrong? And thinking will we ever find a way to work things out, my computer and I… will we ever come to some kind of mutual compromise?…for it to work…and for me to love it a little more?

and such situation not only transpires at home… it permeates into my work life through ways only some omniscient being would know…seriously! In my first week of work, for reasons even the I.T guys didn’t know… my motherboard blew up!! I mean… who does that??!

I kid you not… I came into work one day and attempted to switch on my newly acquainted work computer, when out of nowhere, all these lights started flashing and then it started beeping… not a soft, this is just a warning beep, but a loud I need attention look at me kind of beep…within seconds I had my colleagues rushing over to my desk to see what was wrong! Not sure if it was some elaborate plot to blow me up, I quickly threw my pashmina, my jacket and all my bags over it to hush it up! And then … it fell silent…

Just when I thought it had gone away… and just as everyone was walking away… “beep, beep, beep”… at this point I was contemplating throwing it out the window or in some kind of pool of water to defuse it or rush upstairs to the police department when my exasperated colleague storms over and pulls the plug out of the wall…

One would expect the beeping to stop then and there right? WRONG! The thing was still beeping after that!!!!

So the I.T guy comes over and I tell him to take the thing away… far far away…he later diagnosis a blown up motherboard… and I earn myself a new title amongst my newly acquainted workmates…

…. Its not restricted to merely computers mind you…its technology on a whole… perhaps in some past life I offended some technological elder who has since ordered all things related to make my life … slightly more complicated…

So the photocopier blew up... or put nicely, ceased to function for reasons unknown to mankind…and who was the lucky person who touched it last? Yep you guessed it… I swear all I did was put the paper in and pushed start… I only wanted ONE copy...ONE!

So my one copy comes out and I turn to walk away… *brickabrackanoisenoisescannoise* and out pops another copy…thinking I must have accidentally pressed 2, I turn back to pick up the second copy and go to walk away again…*brickabrackanoisenoisescannoise* and out pops a third copy… thinking it quite strange I return to check the number of copies pressed… “1”, then how can it be that I was now standing there with three copies in my hand…and then the copier jams… I go to check where the jams are and pull out the offending bits of paper…and then, *brickabrackanoisenoisescannoise*… AGAIN!!! And then another jam!!...again a little agitated by this time, I go through the process again and pull out the offending pieces of paper… my boss walks in.. its quiet…thinking that its all sorted now… I turn to go…

This was at the end of the day… I go about my business, I go home…no dramas…

That is… until the next morning!! I come to work to find like 3000 copies sitting on my desk, being copies of a letter to a client…all copies had my name and position neatly typed below my lovely scrawl. And to make matters worse, the photocopier was pronounced dead and I was accused of killing it and not getting rid of the evidence!

art life concerts catch ups death reflection krav

one of them was tall and biggish and the other not so.. i can't remember them clearly now but i recall that they were both rather obnoxious, i guessed that they were investment bankers ...fitting the mould so well they did...

the lift inevitably arrives, one of the more gentlemanly men (i say it with much sarcasm) pushes his way out whilst the bigger one, realising... steps aside for me...

we both walk hesitantly and in anticipation behind these men... i scan the terrain and mark my exits and quick escapes as i do in all buildings of this nature... we walk on... the door opens and a loud chatter filters through...and as i step in... i gasp...

... i scan the room for another female...or someone my size atleast... i can tell that danny is doing the same...he lets out a chuckle as i exclaim, "what have i done???!!"

the others, already doing their stretches eyeball me suspiciously... danny rushes to scan the list for fear of having to partner up with me in training... he breathes a sigh of relief when he spots a 'monica' on the list, reassuring me or reassuring himself he mutters, "lucky there's going to be another chick here"

...and such was my first lesson of Krav Maga (martial arts used by the israeli army)

today... im sitting here with my internet back on okay speed and my thighs...are .. KILLING ME! i think i performed one too many kicks yesterday, pushed myself too hard... haha on another note, im proud that i made it through all the push ups! formerly unable to do even one!

so as my line usually goes, SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE I LAST BLOGGED! so many things have happened, so many emotions have come and gone...

its already the FOURTH month of the year!!

January and February were months of exploration, of self, of identity and of sydney... art galleries and photography lessons and ofcourse exploration of creativity with the launch of bee&b at glebe markets..

March was a month of concerts: COLDPLAY! Sound Relief and the fray. I love chris martin is a line i often use right after coldplay rocks! concerts and catchups...

and April.. this month started off with a twitching right eye that still hasn't ceased! visits to the cemetary to see loved ones who have long left the earth and reflections on life and death and emptiness and ofcourse KRAV... my new momentary hobby...

release

im in such a weird place at the moment

mixed feelings of anticipation of what's to come and of what has passed into the past... letting go moving on saying goodbye saying hello changing places new faces christmas new year breaks festivities functions parties obligations ...work

saying goodbye is never easy

Noosa Baby

...so my next trip came sooner than expected, only a week after i got back from asia i was swiftly swept off my feet and onto a mysterious unknown destination...

all i was told was, "bring your swimmers and a change of clothes and ill pick you up at 6.30am", thinking it was only to be a day trip i got grumpy at the sound of the start time which was heaps early for a saturday...but i obeyed the instructions nonetheless ... and boy was i glad i did...

so i hopped into the car to find dannys brother and danny... thinking it rather weird to be spending my birthday with danny and his brother (who was in his pjs) i began to wonder what was happening ...

only to arrive at the AIRPORT! we were getting dropped off at the airport!!!... i squealed with delight because it was like my dream come true, i couldn't stop smiling! just what i needed! a holiday to get over the holiday! i stupidly question danny "will i get to go home tonight" to which he responded... "ahhh dont think we'll make it"...

so boarding the plane i still had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA where i was heading to...intially thinking it was one of those mystery flights...

we ended up in Brisbane airport... interesting..."oh so we'll be staying in brizzy!BRIZzZ -VEGAS!!! cool!" i think as i am led to a hirecar... i get in, he starts driving and then tells me to take a nap... "NAP??!!" ...cant be that far to brisbane city right?

....ended up in NOOSA!! SUNSHINE COAST BABY!! ONE OF THE HAPPIEST DAYS OF MY LIFE!

Don't you lurRrrrve it when unexpected things turn out for the better??!!!

update

so its nearing the end of the year and i just realised that I haven't blogged since... May? and i wouldnt have even remembered to but for a reminder from claire who emailed me and asked me to change her link.. thanks claire=)

i hadn't even finished blogging about my asia 2007 trip yet and since then ive been to London and i've just come back from my asia 2008 trip!!

rather than pick up where i left off i think ill just leave all thats gone by with a breif encapsulation... asia 2007 is all but a distant memory, nothing more to point out other than after malaysia we went back to thailand, and did some fine dining at Vertigo, hit a few clubs and went to the FULL MOON PARTY @ Koh Phangan/ Koh Samui which was awesome in itself....

London London, when i was younger i had always dreamed of going to London, i was going to practise law there- maybe become an ambassador, and eventually work for the UN in Prague, find a nice english man and settle down and travel europe... so it didnt quite go to plan.. but i got to see London highlights and even managed to squeeze in several day trips outside of London to:

Windsor where we were meant to have afternoon tea with the Queen! but got too busy for her! haha....

Bath- which was absolutely beautiful- it was as though i had stepped right into a Jane Austen novel....

Stonehenge a wonder of the world!

Oxford and Cambridge - two big beautiful university towns

Brighton Beach

other than that other London highlights included seeing DAVID BECKHAM (my other true love) play soccer LIVE by attending the England VS USA game at Wembly(?) Stadium, typical sight seeing stuff like visiting Buckingham Palace, seeing a live broadway show (wicked)and ofcourse meeting up with Bee (of bee&b)aka ThuyLinh hehe and John and Khoa and Franklin Pho!

So after England i came back and waited eagerly for Asia 2008 - the purpose? to watch the motoGP in Sepang, Malaysia and of course to shop... as it turned out the latter was not quite accomplished due to the stipid exchange rate sucking !

and Malaysia 08 will always be remembered as the trip where i fell inlove hahahaha ....i got an autograph from Nicky Hayden (motorbike rider), we had all lined up in the rain for the autograph session - everyone wanted to get their stuff signed by Valentino Rossi or Casey Stoner so i was inevitably shoved into this remotely empty line only to find my one true love LOL ... as i approached the autographing table hesitantly not knowing who he was, i was met by a lovely dimpled grin and the bluest eyes i had ever seen... i was speechless and couldnt even bring myself to utter a word to him before i was quickly shoved out of the line again...

so on this particular trip with Ray, Zoran, Danny and myself we went to Darwin, Singapore, Malaysia and Thailand...

highlights:

Darwin - nothingness! outbackness!! HEAT!

SG - Singapore Chilli Crab (NyUmMmMm!)at Long Beach restaurant! Zoran's expensive FISH!~

Malaysia - Dining with KY, MOTOGP!- meeting MY NICKY! partying at Zouk at the official MotoGP party...

Thailand - awesome food, dining at DOME rooftop restaurant, partying at Santika again - awesome live band called 'BURN' who did live remixes of hip hop songs and turned them into rock songs!!

gawd so now im back... and i dont want to be here...REALITY BITES HARD! im already hanging out for my next trip... whenever that will be!!! anywhere but here is good right now...

still here!! dont go away

yep you guessed it, just a short one to say im still here, stay tuned...DONT GO AWAY

im sorry i havent blogged for ages, my shitbox computer is kinda rubbish atm and wont work half the time...

if someone feels like sponsoring me an APPLE MACBOOK PRO i will blogg more, i promise!! haha

in the meantime you can check out pics here


be back!

...cos i felt like writing shit

YAY congratulations to me... for going over the 8000 hits mark! *pats self on back*

so today i just felt like blogging about nothing in particular, i was sitting here and all of a sudden i felt like blogging and so i am...

cept im also watching the comedy gala on tv and listening to this sick song peter t sent me, labelled "best song ever" ... dont ask...

all this is to save me from stabbing myself in the eye after seeing some pictures id much rather forget... what tha fuck is it with asians and pouting in pictures anyway?

need to clean my eyes

i really dont have much to say cept that someone bluddy used my butter again today at work!! and you know how i know? im very particular with my butter, i always start on one side and make my way to the other side of the tub... and i always use a paddle pop stick so i make straight lines instead of the jagged ones butter knives make... and this morning... i got to work, went into the kitchen to make my breakfast, got out my plastic bag with my name clearly labelled on the front with BIG BLACK TEXTA, untied that bag (decoy bag)... then i untied my second plastic bag clearly labelled in big black bold font with my name to find my nice tub of butter also clearly labelled with my name in big black bold texta.. i opened the lid and what did i see??? BUTTER KNIFE MARKS!!

so i got my texta and wrote "GET YA OWN BUTTER!" ...tempted to add also that the use of my butter would incur a $50 surcharge for disinfecting it! cept danny humbly reminded me that they would indeed leave spit instead if i wrote that...

anyway thats all

Malaysia

i figured that it was high tide i blogged about another fantastic part of my asia trip... Malaysia (BIG THANKS to our hosts, KY, Jeane, Loon and Min)

Highlights:

- trader's hotel (one of biggest hotel room ive been in)
- petronas towers and KLCC
- dinner with KY
- ramli burger (yummm)
- batu caves with Jeane (too many monkeys everywhere)
- KL tower
- genting (a let down)
- night tour thanks to loon and min

Pictures: Malaysia

Random Entry: Day 18 Singapore--> Malaysia

the day started off by checking out and heading to the Golden Mile Complex, a very Thai one at that, one would think that one was in Thailand if they didn't know any better!

after some waiting around, we boarded out First Class Transtar bus - we had games, movies and film clips at our whim and in our faces, we sat on massaging recliner lounges and were served food...





we experienced passing through our first land checkpoint ... ever... i sorta felt like i was in some kind of action movie! but once we had passed that checkpoint, i was consumed by what was essentially Malaysia and i actually felt like i was in Malaysia in contrast to Singapore!





so we continued our merry way and was then dropped off at a bus depot in KL ... got rorted to the shithouse by a taxi driver who charged us some crazy amount of money for literally driving us up the road to our hotel... the brand spankin new Traders Hotel (Sister hotel to the Shang-ri La). The hotel itself was very nice, the room very big and comfortable, the decor relaxing - the only gripe i had was the rude people! the guy at the reception chucked us in room 2424 (doubly easy to die in cantonese) as if we didn't know any better, being highly superstitious i promptly asked for a change cos as i put it on that day... "i dont want to die in malaysia" - but we were stuck with it cos the guy was a prick..











so anyway the hotel was in the perfect location, directly across from Kuala Lumpur's most famous and revered landmark - the KLCC (aka Petronas Towers/ twin towers).

after some exploration, we decided to give the famous KY who was at the time working in one of the offices inside the KLCC, a buzz...

we had arranged to meet on the lower ground floor in front of KFC or something like that, but as we were making our way through the shopping complex towards the meeting point, whilst i was happily gazing at all the shop windows and all the people, i bumped into one smiling lad with the biggest grin- in shock, my innate dork shined and i screamed to dannys shock and embarassment - he was about to lecture me about being embarassing in public again when we both stopped and realised that the smiling lad was infact, the one and only KY!





so he took us to some place near Petalling St and we had chicken rice in a claypot- which was quite yummy but the humidity sort of ruined my normally healthy appetite...





ky bought about 5 kgs of that yummy bbq pork that costs like $10 for two peices at our chinatown at home... we walked around Petalling St and had like 20 indian people call me beautiful girl in chinese - gotta love their marketing tactics! bet you get demoted to ugly girl pretty quick smart if you dont buy their goods hey...

so anyway, Petalling St was an experience so to speak... lots of fakes and according to Danny at prices cheaper than Shenzen...

on the way back we stopped by to try a Ramly Burger- it was bluddy awesome! i rekon u'd put on like 2 kgs eating this grease filled thing, but at the time of eating you think its worth it...





had a coffee roti bun (craving these like crazy at the moment) from this bakery just outside the train station at KLCC, such a good idea because as you walk through from the station the scent of coffee fills the air and for some reason, you just HAVE TO have one... its sorta like when Krispy Kreme first came out here ... but better!





then, tired from the events of the day, we decided to head back to the hotel to chillax at our beautiful hotel bar over looking the KLCC and the city.



Random Entry: Day 19 Malaysia

as per KY's suggestion, we woke up at 7am and made our way over via our hotel's courtesy buggy, to the KLCC hoping to catch the limited timeframe in which visitors are allowed onto the bridge linking the two towers of the KLCC to view the city...





we got there and saw the masses of people and got tired so we headed back and had a humungous buffet breakfast instead...



my mate Jeane came to pick us up from the hotel at 10am and we headed to the Batu Caves (a Hindu Temple)... my lonely planet's guide recommended it so we thought we'd go have a looksee...









after making the 272 steps trek up we ended up in a place that seemed to come straight out of one of them chinese condor heros movie...

there were monkeys galore everywhere and jeane told us that we would be ok if we werent holding anything, and she was right... i saw this monkey try to grab this chick's camera and i freaked...



we chilled for abit with this indian/asian (?) sweet and then we headed to her car... despite my protestations i fell asleep and awoke to an egyptian looking place they call Sunway Pyramid, at first i was abit bedazed and confused as to where i was... as it turned out it was a shopping centre!

after that our lovely host for the day took us to Sungei Wang, the Bintang Walk and Low Yat and Times Square - boy was that place huge - it even had an amusement park with rollercoasters and stuff!











again danny and i shopped at KLCC and then Jeane took us to experience dining... Hawker style.. on a street with lots of ferrel cats in Queens Park... like in them Young and Dangerous movies (yes i watch too many movies!). I must say.. it was an experience...







and then to top off our hectic crazy day, we stopped by the KL tower to view the city!







Random Entry: Day 20 Malaysia - Genting Highlands

so we had it in our heads that the Genting Highlands was a must-go destination - with casinos, indoor and outdoor amusement parks, much shopping and loads to see and do...in our heads it was to be like a cross between las vegas and the gold coast! full of fun excitement and adventure!

....so u can imagine out surprise... and dissappointment when we got there...

the plan was to train it to Putra Terminal and then bus it to the cable car station and then to take the cable car up ... (did you know that the trains over there have NO DRIVERS??! can u imagine how i freaked out when i realised i was sitting in the first carriage... and there was no train driver's compartment??)

anyway, when we arrived at Putra Terminal, they told us that the bus would be a two hour unpredictable wait so we decided to share a cab with 2 other people, one lady from Brisbane named Judy and presumably her friendly chinese /malaysian work colleague Rachel.

boy what a ride that turned out to be. the friggen taxi driver was crazy! he tried to drift all the way up the mountain and we were sliding all over the place, at various points i was so sure the precarious room 2424 was going to come back to haunt me ... and the car was going to either flip, slide right off the mountain or that we would all just pour out of the windows! and the driver, chuckled everytime we came close to our deaths...like he meant it!

unfortunately, that was about all the excitement and thrill to be had though because Genting was sooooo not what we had expected.

and that was to be the last time i would listen to tails of adventures at genting told through the eyes of my four yr old cousin tony!

For many of the places we have visited throughout our trips, we have often said "pictures just dont do this place justice" but for Genting, it was quite the contrary... Danny was even kicked off one ride for being too fat!!!

so all in all we only went on one ride... other than the taxi ride...

and you know what? the people were rude and the service was shit. no offence.























so we headed back and had more fun swimming in our picturesque hotel pool...

then decided to head over to do some shopping at Lot 10, there we met up with Yean Loon and his lovely missus Min who took us to a Hawker stall to eat the famous Buk Kut Teh and then gave us an indepth tour of KL. Noticeably, everything was either 'national' this and 'national' that - which made me think, us aussies arent very nationalistic seeing that we have consumer names like 'telstra' stadium rather than a 'national' this or that...









so anyway, we went on the Eye of Malaysia and funnily enough, the amount of times we went round on the ferris wheel could be bargained! we got an extra round thanks to the charms of our friend Loon haha









but the night did not end there, despite the pair having to work early the next day, we were taken to supper or Yum Cha as they call it there- we went to Bangsar Baju for Rotti. we had rotti tissue, rotti bom, rotti egg and rotti banana and iloved them all!! i wish we could get it here cos i sure am hankering em right now!









Random Entry: Day 21 Malaysia

our final day in KL. with what little cash we had left we woke up and rushed to back to Sungei Wang to do some last minute shopping for quirky gifts and nick nacks and for our maccas brekky...before heading back to check out.

Unfortunately for us, we got a stinky taxi driver to get to the airport... i spent the entire time with my head buried in my top, it was this stinky saliva smell that i still cant get out of my head when i think about my last moments in KL...

to Dannys excitement, we passed by the Sapang F1 racecourse on the way at which he stared regretfully at and vowed to come back in 08 to watch his idol rossi race in the motoGP... we'll see

so we fought with this group of rude old men to get on the plane and laughed to find one man thoroughly strapped to his seat on the budget airliner.. from experience perhaps?