first

Today I went to my first baby shower ever. Weird.

anime

I just really like anime.

inside out, upside down

Have you ever thought you were over someone, but then all of a sudden realized that maybe you never stopped loving them? How is it possible to love someone you don't think you could ever date for real? Or is it just that this person isn't who you see yourself marrying? Maybe that shouldn't even matter.

Inside-out, upside-down,
Twisting beside myself.
Stop that now,
'Cause you and I were never meant to meet.
I think you'd better leave.
It's not safe in here.
I feel a weakness coming on.

Alright then,
I could keep your number for a rainy day.
That's where this ends.
No mistakes no misbehaving.
I was doing so well.
Could we just be friends?
I feel a weakness coming on.

It's not meant to be like this.
Not what I planned at all.
I don't want to feel like this.
Yeah.
No it's not meant to be like this.
Not what I planned at all.
I don't want to feel like this.
So that makes it all your fault.

Inside-out, upside-down,
Twisting beside myself.
Stop that now.
You're as close as it gets
Without touching me.
Oh now don't make it harder
Than it already is.
I feel a weakness coming on.

Big trouble losing control.
Primary resistance at a critical low.
on the, on the double gotta get a hold.
Point of no return one second to go.

No response on any level,
Red-alert this vessel's under seige.
Total overload all systems down they've got control.
There's no way out.
We are surrounded.
Give in, give in and relish every minute of it.

Freeze, awake here forever.
I feel a weakness coming on.

-Imogen Heap

Techno Dependency

It was a heartwrenching Monday morning when I dropped my cell phone. This isn't an uncommon occurrence. Just last week I can remember dropping it at least twice: once down a flight of stairs and once when I forgot the phone was on my lap when I got out of my car. It's been through a lot. There are too many dents and scratches on its face to even count. But my phone was loyal. After a year and nine months it still stuck with me. That all ended Monday morning. I dropped my phone and didn't think anything of it until I tried to call someone about twenty minutes later. The picture on the screen was all screwy. I turned it on and off a few times. I even took the battery out and put it back in. Eventually the screen wouldn't even work. Blank. I suddenly felt so lost and cut off from the world. How was I going to meet my friend for lunch? How was I going to call my management company about buying a contract? How was I going to send text messages? All of these questions came to my mind and I became frantic. But there was nothing I could do. I wanted to get a new cell phone right away. A few hours later I remembered that I could communicate with people via other devices. So I emailed my mom to let her know I was in distress. Good thing we have email or I don't know where I'd be.

What's sad to me about all of this was that I realized how dependent I was upon my cell phone. Once you have one you can't live without one. There was a time when people actually called places instead of the people themselves. Sometimes I ask myself how our parents did it. How did they meet up for lunch? How did they know to go find their friends at the Smith Fieldhouse for a volleyball game? How did they have DTRs? It's a mystery to me really. That's all.

Airborne

While looking over my currently-showing blog entries I became disappointed in myself and in the impersonal nature of most of them. It appear as though I have qualms about revealing personal feelings online. That's a shocker. Anyways, the entries still feel a little lame to me. I'm supposed to be writing a five-page paper that's due tomorrow, as if media criticism is important to me. Instead, I'm updating my blog, not only because I received a hateful threat from Hannah, but because I realized an old friend has been viewing my blog from way over there in Ohio. So the semester is winding down, and I'm apparently getting senioritis even though my roommate, Ashley, vehemently claims I'm a junior. Whatever. Technically I'm a senior all right? Even though I'm not graduating this April, there are some exciting things coming up. I kind of feel like I'm taking off in my life; going airborne, if you will. I actually have some documentation of some of the recent air I've caught.

COLORED AIR
I went to the Festival of Colors at the Hare Krishna Temple about a month ago. It was really fun. Who knew people would pay a dollar or two to throw colored flour (or whatever it is) all over each other and have fun doing it? I was even in a picture in the Deseret News about this event. P.S. There were definitely more BYU Mormons there than any Hare Krishnas.




SWEET AIR
I went to Sundance with some friends. It was their annual dress-up day at Sundance which explains the orange hat. It was my third time snowboarding, and I still fall a lot (but definitely less!). Unfortunately I broke of the tips of two spinus processes on my vertebrae doing so. But as long as I got my first big air right? I already had a bad back. Note to all: Your chiropractor might get mad at you if you tell him you had someone pop your back because it was hurting. Apparently that's a felony.

UPSIDE DOWN AIR
I went home the Sunday of General Conference. In between sessions my siblings and I felt we needed to take advantage of the lovely sun and spend some time on the trampoline. Ah, the bonding that takes place on trampolines. I love them.















URBAN AIR
I'm leaving for New York City in 18 days to do my internship! Mmm, inhale and smell the city.