becoming a little more self-reliant

The urge to sew sprung swiftly from somewhere within, and I acted upon the urge as soon as I could--a few weeks later after the last final had been graded, grades posted, the office party attended, and our hasty family vacation in the Heartland.

My grandmother was as known for her knitting as she was for her cookies. My mom was handy with needles and thread and yarn herself, but between raising me, fishing and hunting with Dad, helping to build a house and then keeping the house, I rarely saw her practice the craft. We certainly never found the time for her to teach me the basics. Well, there was one year...

My knitting bag, which sits in a drawer--in her house--tells the story: I made it through a few pearls and knits, maybe seven rows total, in a half-hearted effort to knit a blanket for my dolls. Was I too young? Was I just not coordinated? Who knows. I've just never wanted to knit since.

During Pioneer Days in the fourth grade we practiced sewing samplers with yarn and burlap. Mine looked terrible. I even tried a simple cross stitch pattern during my "nesting" period, and put it away in shame. And yet I've looked longingly at my mom's sewing machine and her handful of creations. Surely, with a machine, I could do something.

My husband knows that I am almost handicapped in the cloth and needles and thread arena, so I was certain he had laughed off my request for a sewing machine this Christmas. After all, I had NEVER touched one before except to move it. At the same time, I wanted to learn a productive, useful skill.He gave me a wonderful surprise, my very own sewing machine.

I had already purchased cloth for pajama bottoms (inspired by Aunt S.) and had picked up Grandma's sewing machine. I think the most difficult part of this venture was locating the right materials in the fabric store, transferring the pattern, and then cutting, but I finally got it.

I was really grateful that we had removed the wall and put in this extended counter. We never imagined it would be used for this purpose. One leg cut, one more to go.

I successfully wound a bobbin, checked the needle, etc. I was feeling good when I put my foot on the pedal for my first machine stitch. Mark had made it look so easy, but my stitch was a mess: I forgot to lower the foot. My first sewing project continued with peaks of success and valleys of starting over. It helps if you understand the vocabulary of sewing patterns.

At the end of two days I had decided that at this point I'm not currently aspiring to be a domestic goddess, maybe a domestic nymph. In the meantime I might enjoy myself in creating useful things for my family.

Miah enjoyed her new pajamas covered with animals. Mom enjoyed using the pattern to teach her more words. She didn't care that I was taking pictures as long as she could love on her bear. Can you believe she used to be the same size as that bear?

tea break

Grandma and Grandpa stopped by last night for quick visit with Miah before heading back to Oklahoma. They came just in time for tea.

It's a good thing we were drinking make-believe-tea because we would have all drowned. Miah makes a delightful, diligent, and indulgent hostess.

In a couple of years we'll pull out the genuine miniature tea set and learn some basic etiquette. Until then we'll encourage her sense of generosity.

pecans

When Mom said she could not help with the dishes, she decided the next best thing would be to eat pecans. What a mess! But oh so good.

"Hmm, I've seen Mom use these before and they look pretty easy. I wonder if she'll notice?"

"I may not eat lunch, but I love snacking on pecans."

filling the freezer

It's come down to that time of the month again, the time when I have to plan meals for the month. Most people think I'm crazy to try and plan ahead for a month, but my self-observations prove that's what I have to do if I want home cooked dinners on the tables most nights. This month we did well living on four lasagnas, chicken breasts, pork loins, sundry cuts of beef, and leftover recipes such as quiche and soup. My hectic trips to the store were mostly for holiday ingredients since I don't have December traditions or game plans established yet since every December has been vastly different from the last.

One winning holiday recipe came from me rushing late out the door one morning, desperate for caffeine before four hours straight with my kids. The Starbucks' deal for a latte and Cranberry Bliss Bar was too good to pass. As soon as I bit into their treat, I had to have the recipe--which is top secret of course. Undismayed, I found a couple of acceptable copycat recipes, and I have now made three batches. The lady who posted her version on Recipezaar used to have another version which was my favorite. For the last batch I went with Mr. Breakfast's version which includes crystallized ginger. I think I'll leave that out next time. Those of you who wanted the recipe, you can follow these links and experiment. You'll want to use good-quality white chocolate like Ghiradelli or Calebeut.

http://www.recipezaar.com/Cranberry-Bliss-Bars-106405

http://www.mrbreakfast.com/superdisplay.asp?recipeid=1140

I am excited for January's recipes, however, because I uncovered a magazine I bought last month that has some healthy, tasty recipes. It will force me to bring seafood into our diet. Taking after my parents, I don't think about eating seafood when we live so far from the coast. In the meantime, my parents live only a few miles from the top fish supplier on the Western slope, so when they're not living next door to the harbor or on the lake, they have a satisfying seafood source. We're not so lucky. But we'll still try some salmon and scallops this month.

I'm also looking forward to the super-simple preparation of cranberry sauces. We made a cranberry sauce this year with Port and orange juice that was fantastic. I'll make another batch using fresh squeezed apple juice. I love throwing cranberry sauce over pork loin for an easy meal.

five days of christmas

It's good to be home. But it was great to visit with family; the time passed too quickly.

This trip, Mom came prepared. If you were faced with approximately twenty four hours on the road with a 23-month-old and a dad who has .46 seconds of tolerance (which rounds down to zero tolerance) with any whimper from said 23-month-old, what would you do? I was desperate. I packed a diaper box full of new books from Target's dollar section and old favorites; stuffed her lap desk (the best two dollars spent at Goodwill yet) with stickers, small bits of scrapbook paper, a tablet of construction paper, colored pencils, lined paper, and glue sticks; I further stuffed the diaper box with sticky foam project letters, tin foil, her purse, and a baby. We just about made it through the trip whine free. I think we went through a total of ninety minutes of fussing the entire drive.

Thank you to http://www.momsminivan.com/ for the suggestions. This site gave me a lot of ideas and saved me a lot of money since I had half of the materials she recommends and the other half I'll be wanting to use anyway. The mom breaks down ideas for different age groups, so I'll be back to the site next year and the year after...

Mark was so thrilled with his first Christmas gift, a portable DVD player, that he actually let me drive through northern Oklahoma for a part of the trip back. I saw some pretty areas I never knew existed, and it sure beat driving through southern Kansas.

But the best part of the past five days, of course, was spending time with the family. Miah wore herself out running, singing, socializing, and taking care of babies. We've all tried to explain how cute Miah is when she plays Mommy, but this is the first time we've tried capturing it on film. Her attention to detail was startling; she would hold her finger over the milk bottle and shake it before giving it to her doll. Later in the afternoon she ran to the kitchen to get more milk out of the refrigerator for the bottle.

Kellen was also enamored with the doll that he gave Miah for Christmas, so we all had to steer him toward his new tool bench once Big T got it assembled. We're looking forward to seeing the projects he makes from his bench when he gets older! I'm sure that Kellen's appreciation for the doll is a sign that he'll make a good brother.

Little S made pajamas and matching pillows for the kids. What a great gift. The pillow is the perfect size for Miah's new camping bed, but she found another use for it as well: sun blocker.

While the men packed up all our stuff into all three cars, Grandma helped keep the kids busy with "Ring Around the Rosy" and somersaults. As soon as Miah was flat on the floor, Kellen was already prepared to go.

And sometimes he couldn't even wait that long.
We can't wait to you all again.

A+

Miah is already an A+ student.

On Monday, the babysitter told me the story of how Miah completely soiled her clothes twice in one day. But yesterday the babysitter told me that they all had a great, fun day together (I'm still waiting for pics of Miah and her "boyfriends"). On second thought, she turned to me and said that Miah was usually good, about 98% of the time. That's the kind of character report a mom can be proud of.

decorating for christmas

Christmas is much more fun with a two-year-old. Miah just walked over to the Christmas tree to show off the first ornament she helped place on the lower branches of the tree. She is really proud of herself.

Not only did she help decorate for Christmas, she shone in her first Christmas performance. I was a little nervous that she would freeze in front of the congregation, but she took one look at her audience and did all the cute antics that she did during practice. At the end she stood up, clapped, and boogied--and wondered why no one would join her. She is a treasure! I heard the camera go off when Miah put her arms together in the "baby" sign. Can't wait to see the pictures, and I am really glad that Grandma and Grandpa were there to see it all before heading out to Oklahoma.

Meanwhile we finished our simple Christmas decorations; I glared and complained that my incorrigible husband prodded and poked a particular package; we're making egg nog; and finally a friend is coming over to play games. Decorating for Christmas couldn't be complete without a game. What a great day with the family.

crafty

In college I took a career placement test. The number one career for me? Kindgergarten teacher! But as an entrepreneurial mom wrote in "Cookie" magazine, most parents don't know how to play with their children. I'm one of those moms, and that's why I grimaced at the thought of a bunch of kindergarteners running around my feet all day.

Meanwhile, my daughter is growing increasingly curious and is about to turn two-years-old. How, I've been asking myself, am I going to be more intentional about instructing and playing with her. We camped out the other day at Mardell's to peruse the handful of books that would answer my question. They're expensive, and I find that we're doing a lot of things they suggest already. Fortunately, other moms have been at work to answer my question (http://www.makingfriends.com/-readers_2yearolds.htm, http://www.hubbardscupboard.org/-joyful_learning.html) in budget-friendly ways.

Although, even as a kid, I found all crafts quite pointless, it appears I'll have to change my mindset. Glue, pasta, foods, felt, foil, safety scissors, shaving cream, icing, home magazines, and messes: here we come. Glitter, you alone are safe.

bandit

We all knew Miah could climb out of bed if it ever occurred to her. It occurred to her. She's been climbing out of the pack n' play all week at the baby sitters, so it was only a matter of time for her to bring the habit home.

Last night we were watching a movie in the back bedroom and kept hearing the strangest noises. Finally we realized the noises could only be coming from Miah's room from Miah herself. But the first thing she did was lock the door on us. She hasn't yet learned that her father is in EMS and he is always prepared to get quickly into a room, so the key was quickly accessible.

Three more trips into her bedroom, Miah fell fast asleep. I'm off to get a camping bed to use in Oklahoma and until Mark is at home long enough to assemble her bed.

huntin' fools

A couple weekends ago Mark went hunting with his dad, our friend Chris, and some huntin' buddies. I really like this picture--the flatness, the solid colors, the anxious dog, and the hunter in wait.

Boy Kansas is flat. This picture makes the feild look dry, but the next day the heavens opened up. The water ran off Jimmy and filled up his boots twice. Chris took the position of blocker to get out of the rain. Sounds miserable.

I have to brag about my husband for a moment: he brought home the most birds! Then he was really good to me and cleaned them all himself.

This was the first time Mark hunted with a dog, a pointer to be exact. I was certain that Mark would come home wanting a dog, but the pup didn't have the nose I came to expect from my old hunting dog. Now I'm in favor of a german-wired-haired-pointer rather than the german shorthair. We used to go through fields other hunters had gone through and walk out with multiple birds because Fargo would both track and sniff the air.

I am four pictures away from developing another roll of film. I can't wait to show you pictures of Miah in her ponytail: Where did my baby go?

vacation

Roxy supervises the packing.

Last year we purchased a vacation plan that we need to use up by May, so we headed up to Steamboat Springs the last weekend of October. We had just gone through a snow storm, and I was certain there would be snow in Steamboat. We woke up to 40 degree, sunny weather that quickly melted any bit of snow in town. So much for sledding.

Although I didn't get to play in the snow with Miah, the one bedroom suite was comfortable. I relaxed by the fire the night we arrived. I definately want to return, just to cuddle up next to the fire as it gently snows outside.

Miah wanted to wear her bear snow suit every chance she got. When we prepared to go find some breakfast, she was thrilled. She wasn't as excited about her boots which slowed her way down as she clopped along and examined her feet along the way.

The kitchen was really well supplied. I'll come better prepared to use the kitchen next time.

some pictures from october

When we were in Arkansas this summer we watched two sign language videos that Little S picked up from the library. The signs that I learned that day I reinforced for the next week, and the ones that were actually applicable we kept using. But Miah remembers all of them. Just recently she found fish and flowers in her books and has all but signed her hand off over the discovery. My fears that signing would keep her from talking go unfounded. She seems more likely to say the words she signs than any others. From what I read, we just don't talk to her enough; that's why she still speaks in an alien tongue.

Fall always makes me hungry and itching to cook, so we like to host a feast at the first signs of the season. Grandma contributed a recipe for pumpkin stew served inside the pumpkin. I still had two pumpkins kicking around, so we tried it. Except for the little leak that sprung it was beautiful and tasty. We'll definatley do this again.

Miah, of course, helped make the family recipe: noodles. She loves eating flour and having anything to do with getting on her stool to play on the counter tops. I suspect she will be up here again tomorrow when we go to prepare our late Thanksgiving meal.

All that cooking makes a person tired. One of her favorite games right now is to make us play "nap". She first got Dad to lie down, then plopped her baby next to him, and then rounded up a blanket. I was then directed to cover up all of three of them and to be quiet.

helping hands

Miah surprises me with her ability, willingness, and ideas of help these days. When I ask the baby-sitter if she was good that day Rachel just raises her eyes and says, "Yes. She's helpful." (This comes from a mom of four young boys who are better at making messes than cleaning them up.) One way Miah helps is by handing Rachel diapers at the changing table and saying, "Here you go."

She took this a little further at our house by pulling out a lap pad, fresh wipes, and a swimming diaper to the living room. She then drug out Pooh Bear whom she placed on the lap pad--just like at Grandma's. She proceded to make a game of thouroughly wiping the bear. Mark raised his eyebrows at me when she insisted, "Eeewwww." (Yes, she got that from me.) When she couldn't get the fabric legs through the diaper, Pooh Bear and diaper were thrust in my lap with a scowl and "please." The two go together these days. The irony was ripe as Pooh Bear was wearing swimming diapers with a Disney Pooh Bear design after having been cleaned for--well, you get the picture.

I'm now fearful of finding a pile of coffee beans or grounds on the floor someday because she has connected the coffee drawer to the French Press (coffee maker). When I cleaned out the press this morning, she pulled out an opened bag of coffee beans to "help" me make more coffee. So often I experience the dichotomy of "Wow! Look at your thinking!" and "Wow! You're going to make a mess and/or get in trouble if I give you even two seconds to use that brain of yours."

the turtle won the race afterall

Gusto. Enthusiasm. Monkey. Embrace. These are the words that come to mind when Miah eats bananas. She'll finally decide she's going to eat, and--by golly--she'll eat a banana. She puts all of her energy into stuffing her mouth and rolling banana around in her cheeks.

I've come to love the spirit of activity that toddlers invest in their play, their eating, their loving--no matter what it is they're doing they give it their all. It's something that I've misplaced somewhere along the way.

My teachers used to call me methodical because I certainly wasn't slow, in the way that word is used to describe learners, but I wasn't quick either. I thought I would never learn to multi-task and secretly laughed or blushed when women were praised for their ability to do so. Certain jobs urged the multi-tasking gene to come forth, and that has come in handy, but a friend of ours caused me to laugh and love my inner-turtle ("The Turtle and the Hare") when she said that studies show multi-tasking makes you stupider than when you're on drugs.

on becoming... from the Skin Horse

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept."

The Velveteen Rabbit

so pretty

Filling enough for three pies, five lasagnas, five bags of leaves, one dishwasher load, three dish drying rack loads, and four loads of laundry with four more to go. Is that the way to measure a weekend? I wish the answer were no. The fact that I can refer to my two day weekend with such numbers makes me think of all the laughs and giggles and songs I missed with my little girl. While cleaning is part of my responsibility as the woman of the house, I wonder if in later years I'll wish I had let the sink pile up a little further, the dust pile a little deeper, in exchange for reading another book to Miah.

In exchange for the guilt of slaving over the stove all afternoon, I have the satisfaction of my house smelling like a home. Not for the first time I regret that my husband has lost his olfactory senses. The ventilation system has a mind of its own and disseminates a different smell to each room in the house. One might capture the cinnamon in the apples while another smells like apple peels. As we came in from tackling our pile of leaves--I mean a monster pile of leaves--I was wrapped in the savory smells of tomatoes, spices, artichokes, red peppers, and bubbling cheese. Perfect.

Equally perfect is Miah's new song: "I pretty. I pretty. I pretty, pretty." This is her original adaption from "I'm so pretty, so witty.... so bright." I tried to get her to end with an elaborate "bright," but all I got was some look I'm sure I'll see again in twelve years when I suggest she do something that cramps her teenage individuality. As long as she was in the mood for singing, I tried to engage her with A-B-C-D, but she clamped her mouth shut at C. Where did she get her stubborn streak from again?

bad days

Mark and I both work jobs that can be deeply discouraging. Yesterday Mark thought he had been given a break in a series of deaths and saved a four-year-old girl. That didn't turn out to be the case: she is brain dead today. Furthermore the parents might be charged with neglect--for letting their daughter play unattended in the back yard. The story haunts me.

Meanwhile, I am haunted by the changes in our country. People continue to believe this is just another four years in America's history. I almost wish I believed this too because it would make my life easier. Instead, I see the ambitious, bright, even somewhat traditional students--you know, the kids who typically make the most a free market system and want good families; I see them and I think of which of these crazy bills will be coming to fruition just before or just as they enter the work force. I think of how much they will be taxed. I think of how practically impossible it will be for the future entreprenuer I spoke to today to start his business. The only thing that stops me from bawling in front of my students some days is the fact that they would think me crazy.

li'l pistol

I never know what Miah will get to do, see, eat, or get on the days that Mark watches her. This week Mark turned her into a little cowgirl. One day she received a small stick horse and another she was running around with a pink pistol.

What else has been happening with us? Well, last week we hosted a Fall Feast somewhat potluck style. A lot of people were sick or had to stay home due to the weather. Bummer. But we had fun with those who came. One friend we haven't seen in quite awhile stayed until midnight playing games.

I continue to be busy with school and trying to keep track of the weird schedules this semester continues to throw at me. I'm afraid that it has made me a temporarily horrid housewife, but that periodically happens during the school year.

Mark is back to a normal schedule--normal for us anyway--and except for Mondays works with a partner he likes. That has been a huge relief for all of us. At the same time, work is awfully busy since they pulled two ambulances off the streets.

Miah tries to add a word or two to her vocabulary every day. She has finally settled into the new home day care I found for her this year. Instead of crying, she will actually tell me goodbye in the mornings and run away when I come to pick her up. As always, she likes to dance, run, make us all laugh, run, get in trouble, and run. I love watching toddler's run. We're trying to satisfy her interest in things mechanical and her love of babies.

weekend update

The pictures from the pumpkin patch are in and posted (see two below). We probably won't have much to share the next couple of weeks. This weekend is a working weekend and next week I have mandatory training both Saturday and Sunday. That's OK, though, it will be useful information and then we have a Fall Feast at our house to get ready for. Hooray for good food and friends.

with a bow on top

The ever-talented, devoted Dad ties Miah's hair back. It's a proven fact that I can't do anything with hair, so Mark stepped in.

Miah sat patiently, for the most part, with her legs crossed on the table.

Horton had to help out at one point. And we encouraged her to sit still while Dad made her pretty--one of her favorite words.

All pretty, with a bow on top. Of course, this didn't last. We picked up headbands at Wal-Mart just a little while later.

pumpkins for my punkin

Last weekend it was hot air balloons and monkeys and sea lions and state fair animals; this weekend we ventured North to Black Forest to play at a pumpkin patch. Miah selectively remembered the little horse that nipped at her and held her free arm behind her back every time we introduced her to a farm animal. Except for the rabbits of course. Mark and I petted the sheep, goats, horses, donkeys, the alpaca, and even the camel while Miah laughed at us, hand tucked as far away as possible. We did, however, get her to ride the pony for a few turns. The first time around she grinned over the ponies at her dad and said, "Whee!"

Then Mark laughed at me while I bumped along in a barrel train to keep Miah company. I really should have just walked beside the train like I had planned, but instead I squeezed in and over the sides of the barrel car. We raced rubber duckies, Mark gave me a lesson at lassoing (boy am I glad he didn't have a video camera), and then we raced each other down a 100' slide.

I learned that Miah likes slides even more than her mom. She wore me out! We walked away with three smallish pumpkins that I thought I could use for cooking: my little punkin LOVES pumpkin. Using fresh pumpkin for cooking is new to me, and I'm a little skeptical about the yellow hue to pumpkin I baked tonight, but we'll see if I can't make an edible soup out of it.

"Look Mom, I found one for you."

state fair

"Say 'banana'!" We posed for a picture with Kamila the baboon after watching the show "Wild About Monkeys" at the state fair. Kamila starred in Evan Almighty and other movies, so this was is Miah's first picture with a movie star. Plus we think it's kind of cute that our "little monkey" finally met a real monkey.




While we might have been impressed with the monkey, Miah was falling in love with rabbits. She was thrilled when this rabbit sat in her lap for a minute; in the the show rooms Miah made it clear that her favorite rabit is the white haired, red eyed rabbit from the Cadburry chocolate commercials. I decided my favorite is the Mini Rex rabbits with the velvet fur. Then my jaw dropped when we met the French Lops which weigh about as much as Miah.

Miah was just as excited to try to climb the fences as she was about petting the animals. After getting nipped at by the miniature horse, we moved over to the calm donkey.

I was excited to see that Miah took to the goats--though not as much as to the rabbits--because someday I want a couple of Pygmy or Nubian goats. Mark tussled the goat's head before letting Miah get close, so Miah imitated by grabbing the goat by the horns and head-butting him. I'm glad she didn't do the same with the huge cow we saw in the judging corral. We got to see some massive brown cow with horns about the length of our vehicle who lowered her head at all the spectators and let out the deepest, longest moo I've ever heard. It was so low that I almost liked it.

balloon classic

Labor Day weekend always brings the balloon classic to Colorado Springs. Locals gather to watch hundreds of hot air balloons launch on the weekend mornings. This means rousing ourselves early from bed on a holiday morning and fighting a crowd before we've even had breakfast. It's always worth this because it's a pretty fantastic sight; it is also the occasion of my first date with Mark. (We didn't call it that at the time because we were just getting to know eachother and decideing whether to date, but since it worked out I call it our first date.)

The other two times we've gone, we've been on the other side of the lake watching the balloons fill, expand, grow like a bunch of circus tents coming to life and lifting off to touch gently upon the surface of Memorial Lake and then float off into the sunrise. Some of the balloon handlers touch the lake like mosquitos and others, with a lot less finesse, almost drown themselves. Miah loved to wave at the people as they drifted overhead.

Although she enjoyed the balloons, Miah thought it was too early in the morning to smile for the camera. Roxy meanwhile, barked up a storm at every balloon she saw. Notice her ears are back! We won't take her next year, poor thing.