Done! (well, for now)

After staring at the blank section left on my life box and trying a 1,000 different things, this is what appeared:

My thought is that through your support and caring, I found the spirit to believe again

~ in myself and the decisions I've made

~ in the power of positive thinking

~ and most significantly, if the healing elements of bead journaling

As many of you may know, I was first introduced to bead embroidery through classes at my local Historical Society which are taught by Native American women from the Tuscarora Nation.

I couldn't resist adding one of my favorite coins. A 1900 penny.

I hope that when I pass from this earth, God grants me the favor of traveling back in time to Buffalo at the turn of the century. I would love to have attended the Pan American exposition held here in 1901. That would be heaven to me.

I use a scallop seashell to scoop up my beads from my beading mat. It is the best 'tool' ever. I don't even know how or why I started to use it, but its just a perfect little scooper. So when I was scrounging through all my treasures and came across a set of pewter seashells, I just had to pluck the scallop one from the group and put it on the box.

I feel peaceful now when I look at the final piece.

Maybe I should be calling this my Peace box.

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I will eventually put the bottom cover on and either add bead "feet" or a raised rope to lift it off the table a bit, but for now I have to set it aside and get started on next year's Beading for a Cure piece. Don't miss out on this year's auctions - there's some stunning pieces up for auction now. Click on the link on my sidebar to help the fight against colon cancer. We need all the help we can get!

Emerging

The memories of all the good times blanket my soul.

Layers and layers of laughter.

Like leaves on the forest floor. Memories that will eventually fade over time, but will never be forgotten.

For they give nourishment to the good times to come.

I feel my spirit emerging from those memories of laughter.

The sadness and bitterness less heavy.

Spring is in the air and in my soul.

My thoughts and energy now more fully directed to my three daughters.

Teenagers now, ready to disperse into the world, take root, and flourish.

Pete and I always there to support and cradle them with our love.


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Just by chance, I stumbled across that most-fantabulous dandelion art bead made by Kate of Studio Art Bead.

Claire (my oldest) has a tattoo across her back that she designed. 2 birds (representing Pete and I) holding a ribbon in their beaks that surround 3 dandelion puff flowers (representing Claire, Meghan and Hannah) whose seeds scatter across her back and eventually turn into birds. Needless to say when I saw Kate's bead - I immediately bought it!

P.S. I don't know why the link to Kate's blog isn't connecting right! So annoying. Her blog is organicodysseys.blogspot.com and her etsy store is OrganicOdysseys.etsy.com

For whatever reason blogger keeps changing the link I put in. I have NO idea why. Sorry about that.

Still Healing

My pathetic tree has found new life.

In all of you.

Your kind words of understanding and support have made all the difference.

And what's really weird, is that I never expected it.

I was unsure that ending the relationship was the 'right' choice nor did I think exposing the issue on line was the 'right' way to heal. But I've been proven wrong. I think, no, I know, I made the right choices on both accounts this time around. I have all of you to thank for that.

My spirit tree is now hugged by a vine. The vine shows the love and support from my cyberfriends.

It is not the vine's intention to completely cover the tree. For it knows acknowledging our past makes us stronger for the future.

But those sad negative feelings threaten to spill out into the rest of my life. Shadowing the future path my life will take. But I know you will be there for me.

Ready to send me positive energy that will transcend through space and nuture my vine. And protect my future paths from being impacted by the negative thoughts I am harboring.

The negativity dissipates and my spirit turns positive, light and happy again.
Renewed and ready for the next journey.

Thank you ~ I couldn't have done it without you!

Accidental Bead Journaling

I knew I wanted to incorporate a tree onto the top of my life box. My thought was to have branches extend from the left side over to the right and then fill in the spaces around the branches with random patterns and textures.

I woke up around 3:15 a.m. on Wednesday morning. Sometimes that happens. I just 'poof' wake up. After tossing and turning, I gave up on the sleep and came down into the studio and started to bead.

Before I knew it, this lonely sad-looking tree developed. Not on the left side as I was planning, but the right side. Above Sabre's dog tag. I thought my tree was going to be a sturdy specimen with full, long branches full of trinkets and fun beads. But something made me stop and say "done."

What!? Why?

It's hateful looking, not at all what I had envisioned.

It looks chopped off and stunted.

What is going on here?

But I listened to my inner voice and let it rest.

I worked on some knitting and then got myself ready for the day ahead. But I continued to think about why this tree was meant to look like this.

It wasn't until the next morning when I woke up and it hit me. The first thought I had was about my tree. I guess you can call it the A-Ha moment. My bead tree reflected the emotions I was feeling when I created it.



You see, a long friendship had recently ended. One that I thought would have lasted a lifetime - sturdy, strong, always growing - like the tree I thought I was making. And instead the friendship ended. And so my tree is stunted. Hmm. Interesting.

I thought even more about that long friendship and the symbolism of this beaded tree.

And I remembered the story by Shel Silverstein - The Giving Tree.

And I saw the beaded tree differently.

Rather than looking at the tree as not reaching its full growth,

I saw the branches as being cut off.

I saw myself as the tree in the story.

Giving and giving and expecting nothing in return, just happy to be giving.

But unlike the tree in Silverstein's story, I can't give everything to one person. I have to conserve my resources because I have others in my life who need me too.

Over the past few years, this friendship changed and because of a succession of small 'hurts' I was subjected to (unintentionally I've been told) by my friend, I came to the painful decision to part ways.

So which is it?

A stunted tree or a once-full tree whose branches have been given up for a friend?

Don't know.

And the ironic part of my placing the tree above Sabre's tag: this friend was the reason I had rescued Sabre. He was found by her and she couldn't keep him, so he was put in the City Pound. No one had claimed him and he was scheduled to be euthanized. My friend was in agony. She never expected that would be his fate when she took him there. I couldn't let that happen either. So he became my dog. He was the best dog - EVER. I miss him. And I will miss my friend too.

And that my friends, is the magic of beading journaling. I've never experienced this before. I never thought I had it in me.

Thanks for listening.

LIfe Box

I promised myself to tackle some of the unfinished projects laying around my studio on a regular basis. I set a goal to get the sides of my life box complete before I did anything else and, surprisingly, I actually did!

Here is a little tour around the sides:

I started by placing two large flat beads in the middle of the short sides. My thought was that this is where I would touch the box to pick it up, so I wanted something smooth and sturdy at those spots.
Then as you make your way around the edges, a theme of life on the planet starts to take shape. Beginning with turtles emerging from the seaand the waves crashing onto the rocks, leading to sandy grasses with palm trees,
which then turn into fields and forest where the wind scatters the leaves and seed pods through the skywhere we come across some butterflies floating over the rooftops until we are so high up the stars are visible.

I've gotten some of the edging done on the top too. Wasn't planning on edging it in lace, but as I was prowling through my studio, I came across some ecru vintage lace edging (machine made), and found myself stitching it down using a beaded rope edging. That works. Now I'm outlining that in a straight line of triangle beads, but I still don't know if I should plan the main layout, or just let the beads decide what the design is to be. I hope I decide soon, before I give up, set it aside and move onto something else.....

Life Box musings

Thanks to Bobbi for putting me on the right path with my life box. Her comment on my last life box post got me thinking that I needed to actually 'plan' the design of this box. As I was walking to work that day, I realized I wanted the box (at least in part) to represent the love and respect I have for nature.













How I'm going to accomplish this; not sure. But I have faith it will work out.












(The pics are really bad, but I really wasn't planning on documenting anything, but I was in the moment, and didn't want to lose the ideas that were running through my brain)



Here are all the side pieces lay out end-to-end. (the above picture is the close up of the only section I have completed so far)









First I'm thinking the sides of the box will represent the land, water, and sky elements. I figure the leaves I've already started will be part of the sky elements, which will wrap around to the front of the box where butterflies will drift on the breezes, leading into a star studded sky. On the other side of the box, the water element will be represented as the turtles make their way toward dry land where they encounter a sweet little bunny.











Then for the top I really wanted to do a large tree and put all my 'stuff' among the branches. But then I just started playing and came up with this design.




I love flowers, so I think I'm going to save my tree idea for another piece (maybe that collar I keep toying with making.....) and make the top 'flowery'.


The right side flowers will be dripping fringe and loop-y things, because I love fringe and I thought it would be a fun element.


The coins will probably turn into a vine, with the coins being the flowers on the vine and the flattened penny being a large leaf.



Can you see that bee up in the left corner? I just love him - he's a pin I got from Anima Designs (cool stuff, you should check out that site when you get the chance)



Sabre's old ID tag will be the 'knob' since I'm going to mount it so one half will set off the top edge of the lid.


















I love this design for the top flower. The coin actually has a hole through the center, so I'm using this bone I found on the beach along Lake Ontario as the center anchor. There is also another weird bone I found on the top of the box too, next to the golf tee.





I have no idea yet how I will fill in the background. I'm sure it will just evolve as I work.

Now I'm ready to go.

I feel so much better with a plan to follow.

Hmm, kind of like life.

Funny.

Mom to the Rescue

I was trying to come up with an idea for a thank you gift for the family my daughter went to visit over spring break down in Port Charlotte, Florida. Sometimes the obvious just escapes me. But not to worry, my mom came up with the perfect idea. A picture frame with a heron on it. Geez, why didn't I think of that? Considering one of the pictures my daughter took showed that the front doors to the house had two herons etched in it. Ya think maybe the light bulb would have went on? Nope. See, I still rely on my mom even at the age of 44!

The color is really off in the picture - the velvet is much more teal colored than this heavy green.

And a wee bit of progress on my life box.

Whenever I bead improvisationally (is that even a word???), I tend to change stitches too much and it gets too busy. So I'm trying really hard to fill in with flat stitches to emphasize the larger stones and shells, etc., that I'll be putting on the box. I have no drawing or plan for the design, I'm just letting the beads show me the way. Let's hope they know where they want to go!