Forgiveness

I think that Forgivness is a hard lesson to learn. It certainly doesn't come easily!! With the loss of my precious Lucy it has taught me somewhat on how to forgive and how important it is for us. Losing Lucy was a very tradgic loss for me, and the way everything happend was just very very sad. It would have been easy to blame the owners of the dog that killed mine, and sometimes the thoughts of revenge sounded nice, but what would that acomplish it wouldn't bring back my dog, and it certainly wouldn't make me feel any better. I hated walking into a room where people were talking about the situation and explaining to people, who were complete strangers to me about the tradgady that I was expierencing in my life. I just kept thinking why do we have to talk about this? Why does everyone need to know about this? If the conversations were there to help soothe my soul it would be one thing, but they were only words of hatred, and that only made me more sad. My only choice was to forgive. It was the only way my heart could bare this, and when I did I could feel the love of the Savior. I could feel the burden lighten. I wish I didn't have to learn the blessings of forgiveness, but I do know that it is essential to our lives! I still miss my puppy everyday I don't think anything can replace her, but I do think that one day I will get to see her again and she will welcome me just as she had whenever I came home. Tagging her tail with her whole body!!!

Stop mom

The other day we were riding in the car and I was singing the song twinkle twinkle little star to Ryann. She must not have wanted me to sing that song to her because she said to me, "stop" "what?" I asked her, "stop mom" she said to me. i sat there a little stunned I didn't know if I should laugh or get mad at her but she just kept going, "hey" she said "stop now!". "Stop Candice"..  And then she started plugging her ears

I am seriously in trouble

My little helper

Ryann is such a good big sister. she is always helping me take care of her brother, whom she likes to call handsome. He got sick this week with RSV and she has been helping me take care of him. When we took him to the doctor I had to take her out of the room when they did the cotton swab because last time they gave major a shot Ryann had a come apart and cried worse then her brother. She hates to see him sad and lets me know every time he cries that he is sad and that I need to make him happy. She's tried to make him happy before but she learned that it just makes him more mad. She also helps me rock him and she helps dad listen to his lungs. unfortunately being a good helper has taken a toll on her and she ended up getting RSV too, but that hasn't stopped her from taking care of her brother. one morning when she got out of bed major was coughing really hard and when he got done Ryann looked over at him and asked in her raspy little voice, " you okay handsome?" being a mom to 2 sick kids can be hard but watching Ryann take care of her brother has also been very rewarding

Major 4 month

little man is growing up so fast I can hardly believe it right now he loves to chew on his fingers and on his clothes and his blankets and anything else you can get in his mouth.

He has gone on what is called a breastfeeding strike and hates to eat he's also starting to fight sleeping which is made for few long nights.

He caught his first cold this month. I'm not sure if it was from me or from his sister. Ryann loves to lick her fingers and then stick them in Maj's mouth and then back and hers it's disgusting and makes it hard to prevent sickness.

He is only a couple inches taller then his cousin saylor but he's getting small for his 3-6 month clothes and I'm wondering if I need to put him in 6 months. He is drooling like crazy and I don't know if that's what's making it hard for him to sleep and eat or what his deal is maybe he just likes being difficult just like his dad. He is quite the ladies man he smiles everyone even if you've not so happy and everywhere we go people stopped me to tell him how handsome he is. Even his sister refers to him as handsome.

I got him to laugh once I think he was so tired but he was delirious. We were Black Friday shopping at Walmart somethings were taking a lot longer than they should have and while waiting Ryan and I play peek a boo I wish but I could have had my phone then I could have recorded at because I haven't got him to laugh too much sense. He giggles but I'm still waiting for that got a laugh. I'm wishing I had my Lucy here to help me out.

Another special blessing

Little brother

Ryann loves having a little brother. It is especially cool to push him in the stroller, sit in the chair with him, swing him on the 1012(  that is what she calls the swing) , give him kisses, even bath time is more fun, But she does not love him to sit in her bumo.

Visiting dad

We love to visit dad at work for lunch. Major tried to sneak a bite of Dad's food. And Ryan loved dipping her fingers in the ranch. She was a little grumpy when we first got there but as soon as she got some food in her she was cracking us up

Are they even listening

Sometimes being a nursery teacher you wonder if the kids are even listening to your lessons. Most of the time it feels like you are teaching a lesson to yourself. Today as we were going inside church Ryann got all excited and said Jesus as we were entering the doors. I was quite impressed that she knew that Jesus was at church without seeing a picture of him or anything. I guess they are really listening.

Samsung galaxy s3

Bryce got me the new Samsung Galaxy S 3 phone on Black Friday for only 96 cents we were debating getting me a smartphone since I never use my phone but since it was only a dollar we couldn't resist and let me tell you once you go smartphone you never go back. This is seriously the coolest phone ever Facebook is better Pinterest is better and believe it or not even blogging is better. Have you ever wished that you could just talk to your computer and it will write down what you are saying? Well on this phone that is exactly what you can do I'm doing it right now. It will even punctuate for you. Is that not the coolest thing ever?! Now hopefully I can get back blogging like I should. Thanks babe for the new phone I love it!

Maj 3 months

 Major has gottne too big too fast. He is such a good boy, and a handsome one at that. He is growing before my eyes I haven't even had time to sit and reflect on all the things that he is doing right now.

At 2 months he started smiling. He was particularly naughty 1 night and I couldn't get him to sleep and just when I was about to get mad at him he just started smiling at me. He has a smile that will melt your heart. He mostly smiles right after he wakes up just when I want to be mad at him but he's got the cutest smile that he is hard to get mad at. He's a charmer just like his dad.

I swear he started rolling over at 2 months. He seems to be so strong for how little he is.  he can hold his head up really well and he doesn't seem to mind tummy time too much, which is good because  he is so strong it can be hard to clean his double chin and it's good for that thing to get some air.

He is such a good little eater, but like his dad only eats when he is really really hungry. I don't know if it's him or if it's me but breastfeeding him has been so much easier then when I was feeding Ryan I was really dreading it but this go around hasn't been bad although sometimes he fights it where is Ryan never fought it. He is really good to take is binky and that too has made things a little easier. I don't think I knew with Ryan but you have to train them to take a binky.

Major sticks out his time and likes to copy. He also likes 2 talk and spit. He is fairly easy to get to sleep as long as you get them in the right position.

My Lucy

My heart is broken, and it feels like it will never be whole again. A member of our family is gone, and I am just not sure how life will ever be the same without my sweet puppy Lucy. she went missing a couple of days ago after searching all night and all morning for her my poor husband was prompted to ask our neighbors living behind us if they had seen our dog, and they informed him that a small black and white dog got into their yard and their greyhound killed it. I was first in shock I didn't want to believe anything like this could happen to my dog. We were suppose to grow old together.

I first fell in love with Lucy when Bryce's neighbor showed me that her dog had puppies. She was only a few weeks old, but I knew that there was something special about her. I immediately went home and started contemplating names for her, although Bryce really discouraged me from getting her, I was going to get her with or without his approval after all we weren't married yet, but the next time that I went to see her his neighbor informed me that she was already sold. I was devastated. I had been wanting a dog for a long time. I was going through a rough patch in my life. I was still grieving the loss of my father, and kind of upset that Bryce and I weren't married yet and convinced that we were never going to get married. I needed to feel loved, and there is no love like the love of a dog. I was so sad I told my mom and sister that my Lucy was sold already, and they decided to get 2 dogs themselves. I tried to convince myself that was going to be good enough, but it wasn't I was totally bummed. When the day came that the puppies were old enough to take home I was in a particular ornery mood, and Bryce called me and asked if I could come over to his house. I mostly wanted to sit and wallow in my self pity, but I decided to go over anyway. he wanted me to help him move some stuff in the basement, but when I got there he left me in the basement to do the moving all by myself, and then finally he said never mind we don't have to move anything, just come upstairs instead. Now I was really started to get annoyed, but when I got upstairs their she was the cutest little puppy wrapped in a big red bow. It was my Luce!!!

I was right there was something special about this puppy. She was exactly what I needed. She had a special talent of recognizing when people were sad and she knew just how to make them feel happy again. Any time I was sad or sick she just layed right by my side. I am not sure how I am going to heal without her right by my side She also had a talent for knowing who wasn't very fond of dogs, and she was bound to make dog lovers out of them. She jumped onto both mine and Bryce's grandmas. Scared them half to death, but Lucy loved everyone, and everyone loved her right back especially bryce and I. 

She was suppose to be my dog, but Bryce and I always fought about who Lucy liked the most. She was our baby, and she went everywhere with us. She use to always sit on either mine or Bryce's lap in the car, but as we had kids she would sit back with them instead.She knew the words "want to go for a ride" and she did even if she had to sit in the car while Bryce and I ran our errands.

 She was so good with kids too. She would just sit there and let the kids torment her. Ryann especially loved to poke her eyes, and all poor Lucy would do is look at us for some help. She was really good about letting Ryann feed her her own food she would just sit there and wait patiently as ryann fed her one small piece at a time, and even though Ryann sits on the floor in her bumbo to eat Lucy never bothered her. She knew how to be patient and wait until Ryann was finished before she could clean up dinner. She also asked "please" before she would jump up on your lap. Lucy was Ryann's first laugh, and the only thing that seemed to get her to laugh for a while. I am so sad that our kids won't be able to have Lucy with them growing up, and she won't be here to make Major laugh. I don'tknow how we are going to get him to do it on his own

Lucy wasn't much of a guard dog. If she heard noises outside she would growl a little bit to let us know, but that was about it. We knew that if anyone broke into our  house lucy would probably just run over and greet them. I think that is one thing I will miss the most is the way she greeted us when we came home. when she was a puppy she never jumped up on us instead she would get down really close to the ground all except her butt, and she wagged with her whole butt!! and then she would roll over so we could pet her belly. She was always the first to say hi and announce our arrival

Lucy loved to wrestle and attack people. She and Bryce  were quite the team he would wrestle them, and pin them down to the ground and then Lucy would attack them by licking them to death. She especially loved to lick them in the mouth, ears, and nose!!

She liked to jump up on your lap and put her paws on each side of your neck like she was giving you a hug.

If you growled at her she would put her paws over her eyes.

I loved to watch her get out of a bath, right after a big snow storm, and when she got wrestless. My mom called them howamoongus. What ever it was it was hilarious to watch.

She hated when you farted by her. she even hated when she farted. She would get up and leave where she was sitting everytime. She also hated it when you blew in her face. She hated it so much she would even nip back at you, but she never bit!

She was a good dog and a good mom to her little puppies hank and fritzy.

She was the best little cuddler, she didn't care if you used her as a pillow as long as she could cuddle you. She could get comfy in any position she was in.

We loved taking her to the park. Kids loved her especially when she would follow Bryce up the playground and down the slide.

 I know some people think that a dog is just a dog, but to me she was my first baby.  When we had Major It really started to feel like our little family was a little more complete, but now it feels empty. She made us whole She taught me how to love and be loved. There will never be a dog like Lucy. She meant everything to me.