It's My Choice

Ever since Doug started classes I've been feeling a little sorry for myself. I love our Little Abi so much, but because of the lack of alternatives I've felt forced to stay home. And that feeling has been difficult since I've always talked about going back to school and getting my masters and doctorate...maybe "jealous" is another good way to describe my feelings. I felt that I was giving it all up to stay home and take care of Abi while Doug got to go do everything I want to do. And day-care is so expensive that it had never even been part of the conversation. Yesterday, by chance, I found my "alternative". I learned that there are state programs that would pay for day-care for Abi so that I could go back to school and/or get a job. I seriously considered it for about 3 mins and easily came to a resounding NO. The thought of regularly, routinely, and consistently leaving Abi to be cared for by someone else made me nauseated. The thought of not being there to watch her continue to learn and grow broke my heart. And the thought of not being there to teach and protect her made the bottom drop out of my stomach. In that 3 minutes I realized that this is where I want to be! And when given a choice--and a very real alternative--this is where I choose to be. With this shift in perspective, I've also become suddenly aware of how much I have to be grateful for in our situation. I am overwhelmed with gratitude to my Heavenly Father. Not just for the things that we have (which are so many), but for the lessons that we're learning, the tenderness with which He is teaching us, and the way we are growing together as a family. We are so blessed.

I still plan on getting masters and a doctorate. I'll just have to figure out a way that doesn't involve day-care.

I want to say that I don't have any judgment for other parents who leave their children with a babysitter or at day care. I fully appreciate the fact that everyone's situation is different, all children/parents are different, everyone has different comfort levels, and "ya gotta do what ya gotta do".

Up-date--Our Little Abi

She sure doesn't seem so little any more. She is now 9 and half months old. She's been crawling/climbing stairs since May and has started walking in the last week. Her current record is 17 steps in a row! Its also starting to look like we're about to get a tooth. I'm sorry I haven't been better about keeping up-dated pictures of her available, but we just barely found our camera last week. So here are some of the most current shots of our beautiful little Abi-Girl!

Pictures of Our New Home

This is what our new home looks like on the inside. I'm not sure if these pictures will give you a very idea of how it looks or not (I'm definitely not a photographer). Maybe sometime soon I'll remember to have Doug leave the ipod with me during the day and I could do a video walk-through of our apartment instead...but for now this will have to do. One thing that I am very proud of is the way this apartment has been furnished/decorated. We brought our bed, Abi's crib, and the dinning room table & chairs with us. All the other furniture has come from craigslist, Goodwill, family, or people moving out who didn't want to take their stuff with them. The most expensive place we've shopped for decor is Target, and the most expensive things we've bought are the washer/dryer ($100 each on craigslist)--aside from those, we haven't spent more than $50 on any one item...I feel so frugal and industrious!!!

This is our front room from every angle

This is our bedroom and bathroom

Our kitchen

Abi's Room

Guest Bathroom (the washer/dryer are behind the green curtain)