...I don't even know what to call this post...

It happened...I found a gray hair. I'm turning 25 this year and I found a gray hair. I'm married, I have a baby, I'm turning 25 this year, and I found a gray hair. Oddly enough, it's not the crisis situation I imagined it would be. I can tell that I'm growing up...mostly because I look back at things I've done and see how I've changed. I know that I'm a better person now than I was then--and I'm grateful to know that and see that...but I'm not yet the person I want to be. I can just see you sitting there rolling your eyes at me and starting to explain that "none of us are" and "that's the point of this life" and I totally agree with you...but I suddenly woke up to the reality of where I am and I need a moment to process it, out loud and in print. It feels more real for me that way. I have a vision of what my life will be and who I will be. I've had this vision for a long time. And even though a lot of it has changed along the way, there are parts of it that haven't. I thought I would be a certain person who would be doing certain things by now...and I'm not and I don't. Most of the things entailed in that statement don't bother me. I knew when I made my plan that there would be things that I could not foresee, and I would need to be flexible. For example: I planned to serve a mission. I planned to have my masters degree before I got married and had kids. I couldn't foresee that I would meet the love of my life my freshman year of college. So I didn't serve a mission and I don't have a masters degree. I'm ok with that. In fact I'm glad I made the choices I've made. Doug is the best choice I've ever made, and Abbie is the biggest blessing I've ever been given. But there are parts of my life that well with in my control and are--for the most part--independent of what I can and cannot foresee. Those are the things I'm talking about. I'm about to hit this major mile-stone in my vision of/for my life...and I'm not the person I thought I would be.
Its odd how even this realization hasn't felt like the crisis situation that it sounds like when I type it out. In fact none of this has shaken me the way I can imagine it shaking a younger me. Its been a moment of "huh...well that's kind of weird." It feels more like a challenge.
I turn 25 in June...and I've got some work to do.
Bring It...Let's Go...I'm READY.