You've got to be kidding me! Right?

So, I'm taking one of my final exams, which we refer to as the O.S.C.E. (pronounced AW-skee). The actual abbreviation for this acronym has been lost to our collective student memory, but we have made up several colorful substitutes which are a little to crass to mention here.

Anyway, the "OSCE lab", or, "my least favorite place on the planet" is a collection of clinic type exam rooms complete with sinks, otoscopes, opthalmascopes, blood pressure cuffs, exam tables, chairs, etc. just like in a regular doctor's office. All the rooms are also wired with closed circuit video cameras and audio equipment which can all be monitored and recorded at a central observation lounge. For this final we had six stations, each one to take ten minutes. This included two patients, two rooms to write reports, one x-ray station, and one laboratory station. The school uses actors hired at the local university to come play patients. For this exam, which was required for graduation, the school decided to put instructors in each room to help out if things got out of hand. These actors are being paid to ACT! One was a myocardial infarction (heart attack) and I'm tellin' ya, I was ready to jump into action! That's why the staff was there I guess, they staff didn't want any of us to start chest compressions without proper cause. I restrain myself from beginning Advanced Cardiac Life Support measures, and write my report. SOOOOOOOOOO....

I get into my second room where there was very pleasant middled aged man in a wheelchair complaining of a pain in his butt! Kind of weird since he wasn't supposed to be able to feel his butt, but hey, I've learned to expect the unexpected in this profession. So I keep asking questions at this keester conundrum, and I start to get nervous...this is looking more and more like a D.R.E. We haven't had to make up any alternate definitions for this abbreviation: Digital Rectal Exam says it all! Now I'm wondering how I'm going to have time to prep this guy and do a DRE to ascertain the cause of his derierre discomfort since I only have ten minutes. So I look at the in room staff member and say "I need to do a rectal exam", she smiles, which really freaked me out! Then pulls a towel off the silicone bum that was innocuously stored in the corner in a cabinet. The first student apparently didn't do the DRE since when I tried to get a little lube on my "magic finger" I noticed that the manufacturer's seal was still intact under the squeeze cap! The staff member and "patient" both seemed thrilled that I had figured out that I needed to do the DRE, but not nearly as thrilled as me when I saw the fake badonk-a-donk come out of the cabinet. Man, I really really hope I passed that test!

Here's my buddy Beauden in his first pictures.  Pretty cute (hope it's not to small to see)

Pictures

Here is a picture of Aryn at one of her track meets with her friends. She LOVES cross country, thought I can't imagine why...all that running! Makes me want to wash my mouth out with chocolate when I say that word! Anyway, I ruined her feet by making her wear different insoles, which gave her awful blisters. But she still runs, and someday, I'm sure, she will forgive me!




Aidan and Derrek hanging out on Aaron's Rhino. They loved to take rides, and really really (and I mean REALLY) wanted to drive it, but, to their dismay, only got to practice. And for some reason they didn't get it when I asked if they wanted some cheese with their whine.








Here are some pictures from our trip to our friend's cabin. We got to play cards, celebrate Alec's 14th birthday, and four wheel all over the mountain! Here is a pic of Aidan hanging out and Beauden not screaming...a rare event on this vacation.








Here we are playing cards at the cabin. Alec is the dorky looking teenager in the center, then (starting to his right and around the table) Brandi, her dad, Linda, Aryn, and my stomach.