The Barrett Five: 2014

I'm that mom that LOVES Christmas. It doesn't offend me that stores put their decorations out early, I actually love it. I Christmas shop year round. I have my house decorated as soon in November as my schedule will allow, every inch I can decorate is decorated. We have 7 trees scattered throughout the house, each one decorated thoroughly with a different theme. My wrapping paper is purchased early in the season and HAS to match. If it doesn't match and go with a theme it cannot go under the tree. We have a separate box of clothes in the attic for my kids to wear of Christmas outfits. There are so many in there they don't have to wear their normal clothes for the entire Christmas season, just Christmas outfits. We only listen to Christmas music during the months of November and December (and sometimes during the summer just for fun). ...You get the point.

My family knows the Christmas story. Burt, all our girls, and I have been raised in church our entire lives. Ask us any question and we can tell you the answer. Luke 2 is read before any Christmas opening at my family's Christmas celebrations. Mary, Joseph, Shepherds, Wise Men, the star, Bethlehem, Caesar, Herod, "real" reason for the season, because Jesus gave us His one and only son... we got it memorized, have had for years!

Every year we have to fill out Christmas lists with our Christmas wish items. These lists have to be submitted to my mom on Thanksgiving. It is a fun deadline and usually catalogs are gone through during the making of these lists. There are usually some big items, some little items, some crazy items, some essential items, etc... Wishful thinking...

Last year, our lists were made and submitted. They were pretty long and the items the girls had on their lists weren't things they really wanted. Most items cost around $50-$100. They didn't think their lists were complete if the entire page wasn't full of items and they kept adding even more things over the following weeks. This bothered me!! They gave no thought to who was going to purchase these gifts. It would be one thing if it were things they really wanted and had for a while, but these were things added to a list to fill the paper. Their attitudes were similar. They seemed entitled to these items. How did they get here? Where did this attitude come from. To make matters worse, they weren't taking care of the things they already had. They had so much "stuff" that they didn't play with most of it, didn't keep things picked up, and were disrespectful with many of the things they had. My issue was why buy you more if you can't take care of what you have already been given. With all my discussing it they didn't' seem to care, or do anything about it. This attitude combined with the 2 page Christmas lists that were submitted made me sick! We had totally lost the true meaning of Christmas and I felt like it was all my fault. My heart was hurting to fix this problem!

I thought hard and prayed fervently about it...finally, I gave the girls one last chance. On a Wednesday, I told the girls they had until Friday to get their chores done and for their attitudes to change or else I would show them everything they had for Christmas and we were taking it all back and purchasing things for a family that will appreciate it. Wednesday, nothing was different, Thursday, no change. Friday, I warned them again. No change. On Saturday, nothing! My point was proven. I had to follow through.

I went and got all their presents I had purchased and laid them out before them. They saw everything, all their presents. They were so excited and loved all the stuff!! Then I told them to load the car, they were all going back and we were going to purchase Christmas for another family. One that would appreciate things. I told them we had lost the meaning of Christmas and it was my responsibility to make sure they understood this invaluable lesson. They were NOT happy. Eva Grace was the worst. She ran away from home (in the cold with no coat, 2 steak knives and a 1/2 eaten bag of potato chips. She walked up and down our street. I did make her bring the knives back because she had my good knives!! After about 30 minutes she got cold and locked herself in the car for about an hour, then came back inside) All 3 cried and told me I was ruining Christmas. Eva Grace even said, "Giving is getting." How did we get here??

As I prayed about this I realized I GOT US HERE, where has my focus been? On decorating our house, on matching wrapping paper, on wearing Christmas outfits the whole month of December... How have I showed them the true meaning of Christmas? I took them to church, told them the story of Jesus' birth, but have done nothing to show them the true meaning of this holiday. We all needed to learn this lesson!

Mom found us a family that we decided to buy for. They had 3 kids about our ages. We were told they wouldn't have a Christmas this year due to an abusive husband and no money. This got the girls' attention. For the first time they started to think about someone else and they wanted to help.

What happened next was invaluable. You could see their attitudes change. We started with the girls crying hysterically as we loaded the presents into the car to return. I heard "you are ruining Christmas" numerous times. On the way to the store I was explaining why we were doing this once again. As we walked in the store, attitudes started to change, the girls saw all the possibilities we could do for this family in need. Each of my girls were responsible for returning their own presents and picking out presents for their aged child with the money. They became excited to buy gifts for others.They picked out a green machine, bicycle, scooter, and some other items. They couldn't wait to get home and wrap each item.

A few days later we went to deliver the presents with mom's friend, their social worker. The girls immediately noticed this family had NO presents under their one barely decorated tree. There were no pictures on their walls and minimal non matching furniture in the house. The family was so excited to see us and couldn't wait until Christmas to open their presents. They opened them while we were there. They were SO appreciative. When they weren't saying thanks, you could see it all over their expressions. The mom kept saying, "thank you." They were playing with the new toys immediately. One bicycle was too small and we needed to exchange it. They little boy didn't want to give it back to us to exchange. He had never had a bicycle before and was so afraid we weren't going to bring it back. We did come right back with a bigger bike. The girls were so excited to give him is first bicycle. He was 9. They couldn't believe it. How many bicycles are in our garage and how many have we had in their lifetimes? How could this little boy never have had a bike?

We left and the girls were speechless. I asked if they were still mad they would have no presents on Christmas morning and all 3 quickly said, "no.". They were all so happy because they saw what a difference their sacrifice made. I related this to the sacrifice God made on Christmas morning when he gave us his only son. This is the reason for Christmas. WE give to others because he gave to us. It isn't about what all we can get! I think they finally started to understand and for the first time in many years, I think we all found the true meaning of Christmas this year.

I did follow through and we didn't have a Christmas opening at our house this year. The girls did get presents from Grandma and Nanner/Poppy. They ended up still getting plenty of things from their lists but they appreciated it much more!

The big thirTEEN. You are growing up in every way. You are almost as tall as I am (mom), you are very independent and are turning into the typical teenager. You think life is not fair most days and tell us about it. You love to cook and are great at surprises. You love details and plans. You get so busy making lists sometimes you forget to do the tasks. You are very thoughtful. You DESPISE shopping (that might be an understatement) unless it is for athletic clothes then you are good. We have an agreement that you will dress up for school 2 days, the rest of the days you demand to wear sweat pants, tshirts, and messy buns. You are very responsible with your school work but your room can usually be found with your closet on your floor. I usually can't find my clothes either because they are also on your floor. You can be super helpful, there are days I couldn't get through without your help. You love church. You love Netflix. You love computer games. You seem to love saying, "whatever," and rolling your eyes because you do it frequently (thankfully, it only seems to happen at home). You still love school and are getting more and more involved in clubs and activities. Your teachers find you a joy in class and extracurriculars. I love you bunches and am proud of the young lady you are becoming. I will be glad when the attitude simmers, but I guess that is part of being the teenager you are so excited to be!!! Happy 13th.

Personalized chocolate covered strawberries from John and Susan. She got them in the mail!!!

See if you can still do this in 10 years, if so, then try in 20 years!!

Left: when she didn't think I was taking pictures. Right: how she reacts when she knows I am taking pictures. WHAT???? I have to preserve the memories.

For her birthday, we took her to get a more grown up haircut and some make up. She got a full make over by the Clinique counter to find what colors she liked, then we purchased her first make up set.