Monday, September 26, 2005
decided to blog.jus had the feeling? was actualli intending to blog aftr exams.ohh wells.
sailing last sat was rather intensive for me,well..not to the extend but jus the test of endurance.was hiking out all the way up and down keta.whoooo! tiring but the feeling aftr was great=) the boys were fast esp ian.always seeing him first or second?it was either ian or isaac.good thing the wind condition was alrite.
i think i am becoming to enjoy hiking out!haha.esp the part where i totally turned upside dwn.thrice my whole face was washed by the waters.rather fun.=))
aniwae,had paper1 for both languages.i lost marks for chi report writing.DAMN.of all things,i missed out the postal code!RAHH.
my class was playing this lame-but-fun game. i think its super fun when u play it.more on exercising the speed of mind.haa.
actually honestly speaking, i din intend to write anything here.but aftr reading stacey's blog ,jus somehw got the inspiration to write?heh.its a compliement stacey!haha.
i compare the past and present.it definetly did change somehw.but there is some things which din change for good.but i guess theres' something thats gonna be with me throughout my life.i hate it but i have gotta spend my life with it.that is being a loner.i don't jus say it without any meaning to it.i see ppl using this word to describe themselves,but soon ppl misuse it and why?the over usage of it pisses me off.why?cos they nvr felt the reality of being one.being jus toyed around for awhile and leaving without a word.I HATE IT.
why can't they accept me being sad,angry,pissed?don't forget i have feelings too.i have emotions.i have every right to feel like this.i jus dun understand why all of u can accept the way ppl vent their anger and get over it but for me,u don't ? i may look happy and all but i jus dare not.sighh.
RODE;
Friday, September 16, 2005
had np today aftr sch.got promoted=))yayys.actualli i was somehw worried.leow alreadi told me during art lesson i may not get it cos of my results.frm the moment he said tt,i cldn't concentrate for the 2 other whole periods of his.i was jus plainly staring into blank space not getting what he said at that point of time when he is like telling us what he expects in out EOY art exam and for the N's? even siva sitting next to me had to ''wake'' me up frm thinking abt it.sighh.
he spoke to me again during np.i knew wad was he gonna ask,i said it b4 he even wanted to tell me what was it abt.i remembered him saying 2 things..'' even if u get A1 for np ,it isn't gonna help cos of ur results''...''now u are 'coloured' in np,now u have gotta do is to buck up on ur studies,do something to it.and it will make u colourful''. it may sound lame or amusing but i think there is more than just these meanings.wad's the purpose for committing to something and neglecting the other when the other is actualli much more impt in the lives of us now?
even the other officers are telling me this.
one thing i gotta do now...STUDY HARD.
Discipline i have to bear in mind. Sacrifice i have to take. Aims i have to reach for. Satisfaction i have to claim it.
RODE;
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
went to sch late.whole sch was like waiting for me to go to my class.damn malu.esp with tt injured foot.pfft.
think today's timetable is rather relax.it pass rather fast though.leow din came.1period for eng.music lesson was test so one by one.the rest jus slack.
and i am unlucky to be the first?i din even practise at all?even a strum?i wan a guitar!rahh.failed it.ms ting jus told me not A,B,C,U.so its obviously D.she said there was a cert at the end of it.i told her str8 i din wan it.she was like giving those ''are-u joking?'' expression. told her like thrice then she knew i was realli serious on not getting the cert. i told her i dun deserve it.honestly,i can't even do the basic.whats there to receive the cert for?
>>>>>>fast forward>>>>>
decided to take off my bandage agn.and frm now on i am gonna wear shoe.jus bear the pain and let it heal.can't realli be bothered to do anything to it anymore.
'problems are things which are made for a purpose in us to overcome'
RODE;
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
decided to go sch with my shoes.din wanna wear slippers,i can't stand the sight of the sloppiness.it jus pisses me off somehw.and plus the smell of the chi medicine on my foot?rahh.wore a guard over to protect it but the pain is realli killing me throughout sch today.pfft.its bothering,the excruciating pain jus comes unknowingly,imagine feeling the ligament pulling more when its alreadi over-pulled? it realli hurts.
as usual i cldn't make myself concentrate during ms chew's lesson.controlled and controlled ,i can't take it anymore! took my bottle filled my face with water.that somehw helped.
had bio mock exam.i skipped one whole entire page plus a few ques here and there.i got the last ques wrong !!which actualli i initially wanted to circle the right!pfft.
aftr sch went to eat at the coffeeshop then stayed in sch for while.went home with grace by bus.my left leg gave way when i alighted and of cos its left with the foot to get the support frm falling.having the left foot injured,i guess i sprained it more.damn,it was super pain right at that moment.
went to see the chi doctor agn with dad.he rub on the exact same spot agn!this time i din dare to scream of let out a word.jus felt rather embarassing to do that.was screaming inside.got it bandaged agn.i mus wear slippers agn!sighh.jus hope it will get soon b4 np on fri.
DEAREST- get well soon kays?drink lots and lots of water especially now you feeling so weak.i am worried about you!=( ON THE AIR CON WHEN NEEDED!!u get what i mean.haha.make sure you get all well before the exams starts!which is soon![i know i am rubbing in,sorry.i din mean to=( ]
ask germaine and andrew to take care too.well,give them SIBLING LOVE!!haha.
RODE;
Monday, September 12, 2005
day1 for the last term.time flies yea.was falling aslp during ms chew's lesson.din noe why was i so tired.pfft.suppose to have math mock exam today but ms gan din realise she haven taught the last chpt.so in the end its postponed to next week.=)her lesson is i suppose the most interesting of all?cos she had a story to tell but we have to keep our pens scribbling cos she wanted us to do the work given to her.if caught looking at her telling the story,she will stop her story! haah. it was abt her dog giving birth.and its one of my favourite breed!!!GERMAN SHEPHERD !!the other one i like is golden retriever.=))love that breed.it gave birth to 7 and our class response was''GIVE ME!!'' she din mind and even wanted to give it away.I WANT ONE !!.
aftr sch,stayed back for awhile then had lunch with angeline[neo],livia and their fren[forgot her name,sorrie!] at the canteen. at the end of it ended up WET. ANGELINE NEO laa,went to spray water with her bottle all over me.rahh!
next took a cab home.the uncle was saying i look intellectual!haha.but actualli i am obviously NOT.he said i can do it for my final year=)) well,thanks uncle for the encouragement!=))))
-i still want to apologize to you no matter what.i really did not expect it will turn out this way.as i said,the period being against me, i totally respect it. just stop saying it doesn't have to bother me even a single bit.it does.
Always You And I-98degrees
Verse
It's so hard to say
How a love could end this way
The one that used to care for you
Just turned and walked away
And it's so hard to find
To leave the pain behind
When all the things you're lookin' for
Your heart can't seem to find
Chorus
I'll be the air that you breathe
I'll be the strength that you need
I'll be the light in your eyes
When hope becomes hard to see
I'll be your shining star
To guide you wherever you are
And I promise that
I'll be by your side
Always you and I
Verse
You know you're not alone
Without a love to call your own
I'll always be right there for you
To help you carry one
A heart that's always true
Girl, I'm giving mine to you
And everything you ever need
I promise I will do
Chorus
Bridge
Girl, in all your sleepless hours
I will make it right
When life feels so wrong
'Cause in my arms is where you belong
Chorus
-i am sorry
RODE;
Sunday, September 11, 2005
went to see the chi doc in the morning.had to wait for awhile.then my turn came.there were quite a number of patients in the room.the one b4 me had i think his ankle injured and the doctor kept twisting and turning it.and i heard the bone crack sound! goodness! was rather freaked out by it.next was me,explain where was it.and he jus kept rubbing on that spot.damn PAIN laa.was like moaning there helplessly grabbing onto the chair so tightly like nobody's business!then next he twist and push my whole foot up.was dying by then.the doctor said i sprained my ligament.shall i call it cool?hmmm. the last time was a twisted ankle,now a sprained ligament.my foot jus rocked totally.
RODE;
Saturday, September 10, 2005
the term holiday is ending soon.and i seriously having a problem in managing my time for the tests coming up on mon. damn. having mock exam on bio and math.and i haven started much revision on it. like only the cells chpt for bio?
and there is still art to be done.sighhs.
but still i can't afford to blame anyone for it.BLAME MYSELF.
din go for sailing today.cos the pain hasn't gone off my foot.it hasn't gone any better.rahh.aniwae,heard the attendance for trng isn't good.alex,wen,hazel and me din turn up.valencia isn't sailing out,staying in the pwrboat.that makes only weekee and sergin and the rest of the boys sailing out.i realise smth,3 out of the 4 not turning up is becos of physical injuries.alex and wen got their arm fractured. i got my foot sprained.see the 'unity' there?? HAHA.
going out for dinner ltr to celebrate mum and dad's wedding anniversary.
HAPPY 16th year ANNIVERSARY MUM AND DAD!!=)))))
RODE;
Friday, September 09, 2005
got a new blogskin!=))) think this is so much better than the previous.i find.anyway,thanks valencia and her fren[avril]for all the trouble!!!=)
went for horizon challenge at nygh.was thinking we will be late but we were jus on the dot!830!haha.had to went thru 7stations.injured my foot at the 3rd station.suppose to cross some hurdles.had quite a bad landing over the first one on my left foot.but ignored it.wasn't that bad then.but aftr the whole thing was like hurting so badly.
limping all the way home.
MY FOOT STILL HURTS!RAHH.
RODE;
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
yipee!my mini is bac in place agn!it can play!seriously i think its mad.it doesn't function whenvr it wans and comes bac whenvr it feels like it.almost went to service it then it became ok.mad.
at last i understand wad am i studying!well its only a chpt but hardly i can k!first time i wasn't distracted by anithing but jus the notes.was like chanting and rapping whenvr i thought of the ans.haah.hmmm...chanting/rapping? the link?
and i din feel slpy the whole time when i was mugging!i think i realli gotta thank partly for the music and the other part my darling!think i wld have been dying of boredom if i were to jus face those notes str8 without anything which gives me a break.=))
mum is so gonna buy the docking system for me tmr.she has been dragging it laa.jus hope i get it by tmr!
-don't get too stressed up by whatever they said or made you pissed somehow.even if you can't manage to get out of it totally,jus remember i will be out there for you to turn to=))
RODE;
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
i wan to study !but i need the mini to accompany.it doesn't seem to respond.rahh.its been my companion for the past week whenvr i face books.now it can't play.pfft.trying to get away frm the com but the songs are all here.self-discipline!!
poor wen got her arm fractured.ouch.[better take care yea,u still mus turn up for sailing!cos u still can learn in the powerboat!haha]
time is running outt.for everything.
My Everything-98degrees
Verse
The loneliness of nights so long
The search for strength to carry on
My every hope had seemed to die
My eyes had no more tears to cry
Then like the sun shined from up above
You surrounded me with your endless love
And all the things I couldn't see
Are now so clear to me
Chorus
You are my everything
Nothing your love won't bring
My life is yours alone
The only love I've ever known
Your spirit pulls me through
When nothing else will do
Every night I pray on bended knee
That you will always be
My everything
Verse
Now all my hopes and all my dreams
Are suddenly reality
You've opened up my heart to feel
The kind of love that's truly real
A guiding light that'll never fade
There's not a thing in life that I would ever trade
For the love you give and won't let go
I hope you'll always know
Chorus
Bridge
You're the breath of life in me
The only one that sets me free
And you have made my soul complete
For all time
For all time
Chorus
RODE;
Sunday, September 04, 2005
had race todae.was almost late la,well actualli i was.but was delayed by the storm.my mum took so long to come home!reached there at 1.
i was able to wrig the whole boat finally!!=))
the wind totally sucked.pfft.it was okay going to start line then it became rather messy there.din noe when to start till i saw the lasers and bytes moving away.had a bad start.
then when it started,the wind began to die down.hate it.the boats were practically floating being drifted by the current.i got real fustrated jus to go round the mark!!it took like eternity to jus get pass the damn mark.rahh.by the time i passed it,the rest were like finishing.those left floating in the middle of the sea[including me] got towed back.was super relief when the powerboat came to tow us bac pls.was gonna die sooner or ltr.had slight seasickness and my back was aching like nobody business!
at the end,most din manage to get a placing.majority had DNF.lasers only had 2 whom had placing.bytes had i think 3-4 who had their placing and thats out of more than 10 boats?
aftr the race was freezing like mad.
went home next.
RODE;
Saturday, September 03, 2005
had sailing todae.i suddenly forgot hw to tie the down-hall!damn.i used to be good at it.and now i have mastered the outhall!!yays!i think.had no more proper life-vests at the rags so since alex wasn't sailing cos she fractured her arm[take care alex!],borrowed her life vests.had the honour of wearing it cos all along i wanted to buy that exact life-vest![thanks alex!=)]
wind was real dead,was taught to do rudder-less sailing.man,it sucked.felt so darn handicapped without having to sail without the rudder.
was told to go bac shore halfwae cos the storm was coming.then jus at the recovery part,almost everything went haywire.the scene was rather messy.the HP[high performance] optimist ppl were launching during the storm while we were recovering.got hit by their boom.at the front of my head.got hit twice todae altogether.and its hard knocks.
then jeremy wanted us to head bac sea agn!!rahh.continued rudder-less.bleah.
all got towed in one line bac to shore but mine got disconnected by the boat infront while being brought bac.crap.so me and wen was like skulling bac like some mad freaks cos our boats were tied together.esp joel who was quite far bac at first but skulled till he caught up.haha.
aftr sailing went to register for the race tmr.i am scared!
went to suntec convention for the food fair with wee kee and valencia cos wee kee's mum stall was there.me and val were so cheapskate pls,was walking all ard to find every bit of free samples to fill up our stomachs.its said to be our dinner.so we had to act as though we were interested in it.and valencia said my acting is GOOD.haha.then went ps walked up then dwn then went home.
RODE;
Friday, September 02, 2005
went to sch with a bad flu.nose was killing me during assembly,was asking ppl for tissue everywhere ard me.
had pe next.played bball for those wanted to.=))
fast forward>>>>>
last period,suppose to have math,but was taken over by ms koh cos she needed to give out the results slips.though i improve a little but still ms koh said i still had a high chance of retaining.i am really scared.
actualli it took quite a while to make myself realise its real crucial.my mood was still alrite when ms koh spoke to me abt my results. but aftr talking to some ppl abt it,i realise i cldn't turn bac.all i felt was crying.damn.
why? i did so badly ,failing everything for term2 but i felt nth.as for nw,its jus slightly better but still its jus as bad,hwever i felt so affected rite at this moment.rahh.
so sorrie to those who got offended somehw by my mood.realli sorrie.
and thanks to those to tried comforting and encouraging me then.u all have certainly help in all ways=))
went for np,we were brought to the asian civilisation museum along with the gabriel people for some heritage tour thing.realised there was this weirdo.shall not elaborate.he was jus....pervertic?
gng bac was NOISY! was like ending up pl and gabriel each trying to sing and outwin each other. rather interesting though.
RODE;
