i've never cried this way in a long time.

i'm not blaming you for causing this pain.

its all me. just me.

i know you have your choice and decisions to make.

and i just wasnt one of it.

i'm paining inside. very much.

as i lie on my drenched pillow, i realise how fragile this lil heart of mine is.

i'm confused.

i dont know who i am.

i dont know what i want

you meant a whole lot to me.

i'm lost.

i hate myself for doing this to you.

ive never felt like i've lost something so important in my life before

ive lost my life

ive love the joy

you meant happiness to me

but now, i dont know if that means you anymore

all the hopes and hours ive spent thinking of the future is now swinging back and slapping me in the face

i gave my best only to be greeted by pain and sorrow

i dont want to wake up to this anymore.

good night.

MALE, Maldives!

:) Just a little from my short getaway. Was thankfully called up for the flight on my standby. Lucky me. Had loads of fun and a bad sun burn :)

Things has been rather.... Weird. All I want to say is that everytime I think of you, I will surely smile. But I want things to stay that way. I guess things were just meant to be as they are. Nothing can be forced. I guess I'll just learn to accept things as the way they are and not expect anything. I've not learn from my mistakes I admit, but this was something I destroyed. Happiness in the drain because of me :) I wonder how things will look from now. sigh.

On another note, I was recently back in KL for less than 24hours for a Japanese Government scholarship Exam. Lets just say, I have my hopes, but hope isn't all enough for it :) I'll wait patiently.

For now, I'll be in Spore for sometime, at first I thought it'd b really good cause I would have been able to see you more often, but I guess that has changed now. Can't wait to sink my head in the skies again. June will be a busy one for me. REALLY busy one. Christchurch, then my annual leave to Japan, then Athens, then Moscow-Houston. I just can't wait to run away from it all :) (n aged method that has NOT worked, but gives temporary relief).

Can somebody appreciate me :(

-jOhN "empty" LiM-

No talk, just pics. I'm behind my updating dateline. I've missed Manchester's pics and nowI'm already back from Male, Maldives! I got called up for the holiday flight! Here goes :) Manchester and Liverpool in May

A quick update, I went to the Maldives recently. Got loads of pics there too. Thats coming up :) and my new roster is Heavenly. Going to Christchurch, Athens and Moscow-Houston(again). Really looking forward to it :) updates soon, i hope. haha! Loves 

-jOhN "glory glory" LiM-