Sunday, November 30, 2008

Anarchy!

As I was waiting in line at the grocery store a few days ago (no, I wasn't distracted by the usual items placed at the register to prod impulse buying, which is a major feat), I found myself contemplating just why—in our liberal, narcissistic, all-about-me society—people actually wait in line to pay for their groceries. It seems to me that in the past decade or so, the majority of the population has become increasingly self-centered and discourteous. I can barely travel five miles-per-hour above the speed limit without one or two drivers anxiously riding my tail and then whizzing past me at the earliest possible convenience. An old man can no longer stand at the register of a convenience store, counting out pennies to buy a pack of gum, without a soccer mom behind him disgustingly tapping her foot, rolling her eyes and sighing with abhorrence as she remarks to her friend on her Blackberry how long it is taking to pay for her morning Coke. In this day of vanity, how is it that a queue can still form and people still wait in line? Wouldn't pure anarchy please the masses today?

As I was contemplating the answer to this perplexing question, other infractions upon my personal "bubble" came to mind. Walking from class to class on campus, so much is forced upon me. Just the other day, I followed two girls (sisters, I assume) who spent the entire length of our walk cursing at each other, throwing their shoulders back and their heads toward the sky, and huffing about like little children. The only way for me to completely avoid the deplorable language that was so rudely used would be to put my headphones in my ears and concentrate on the music on my iPod, but then, no doubt, someone would scowl at me because I didn't hear them behind me and therefore couldn't get out of his or her way soon enough. Almost daily, I am obliged to walk through a cloud of nicotine-laced smoke while walking in the doors of the business building on campus because the "no smoking within 25 feet of a public building" law evidently does not apply to the smokers at universities. The time of good manners has so obviously passed, so why do we even try at all?

Well, I believe I've come up with a half-way decent answer. Most of us live in fear of one another, and those of us who don't genuinely want to make the world at least a little bit happier. The majority of people form themselves into lines out of dread for what may happen if we "butt" in front of someone else. Pick the wrong person to put off, and they'll tell you to "F-off," follow you out to your car and slash your tires while you're putting the groceries in your trunk, and then proceed to ram your compact-sized car with their giant new truck with spinners on the wheels and blaring rap music—sending you directly to the emergency room. For those of you, however, who truly try to be polite, I commend you for bringing a little bit of happiness to the rest of us. You are the one that single-handedly makes the world a better place. I admire you. I want to be like you, but for now I'll keep cowering like a sissy with the other eighty percent of us that are afraid of confrontation.

For those of you that don't appreciate cynicism, I apologize to you for ranting so much in this post. Please come back to my blog tomorrow to see the newest update, because I'll try to write something a little more up-beat.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Toilet Paper and a various sundry of other blather...

I've come to notice one of the little annoying things in life over the past little while. It seems like every time I go into the bathroom to...finish my digestion...I look over to wipe and there is about a half a sheet of toilet paper left! It must just be me, because I seem to have to replace the toilet paper every time I go into the commode, which means that my family must always have a plentiful supply. They must git a great kick out of picturing me stranded on the toilet, with pants down to my ankles, worrying about how I'm going to find the next square of TP without flashing the world. Oh, but don't you worry...I've come up with a system to thwart their evil little plans. I keep a spare 4-pack of toilet paper in the cabinet next to the John so that all I have to do is reach over and grab a new roll. HA! Their plot has been discovered and I am victorious!
Want to know what else has been bothering me about good ol' bathroom tissue? The rolls seem to get smaller and smaller each time we get a new pack! Have you noticed that? Well here's my theory. Companies like Charmin and Quilted Northern and conspiring against the everyday consumer. Every week, the rolls of TP come with one less square. Over the years it hasn't been a problem, but as the rolls get smaller, one notices the seemingly insignificant portion of tissue missing on the roll because we're used to the bigger, plushier rolls of days past. They think that we haven't caught on, but I definitely have. They're charging us more for less...and now I have to look over my shoulder because the toilet paper companies' minions are coming to force gag me. But I won't give up! I won't!!! Tell all the world!
In other news, I have an assignment for my Exploring Multimedia class to play five video games over the Thanksgiving holiday. We get to pick any games we want, but they eventually have to hit every category given to us (New, Old, Computer, Console, Violent, Girly, etc.). So, I've had to ask my brother to teach me how to play video games...this should be an adventure. Last night I downloaded the World of Warcraft trial, and it's actually fun! I'm glad the trial only lasts ten days, because I just might be getting addicted already. Any other suggestions for games I should play?
Well, I wish you all a happy Thanksgiving. Right now, I have to get off the "throne" to find some more wiping supplies without being seen, because I forgot to re-stock my secret stash...wish me luck!

Friday, November 14, 2008

Oh nuts...I mean bananas...

I was talking to my friend Danielle today and she mentioned a trip that she took to Guatemala...i think...can you tell I'm a good listener? Anywho...Danielle said that one of the best part of her trip was her chance to hold a monkey, which subsequently bit her twice and pulled her hair (sounds like some of the kindergartners I used to work with). Her little story reminded me of a lifelong dream that I had when I was...oh...about eight. I wanted to own a monkey. Not just any monkey, I wanted the brightest, cutest, cuddliest monkey in existence. In fact, I still want one. Think about it: monkeys, if well trained, could do chores around the house, give you a little massage, be a buddy, and many can even be taught Sign Language! I could play my accordion while he dances on the street with a cup and make some extra Christmas spending money. Beside all of the above reasons, I think I'd pretty much be the envy of all the kids on the block. I mean, who else could say they have the coolest pet in the world?!?

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Blessings...and a little fun.

It's been a rather interesting week this week. I've had a cold and just haven't felt all-together...well. However, this morning marked the beginning of our Stake Conference Weekend. The University 1st Stake had a stake temple day, and it made up for everything I've been feeling this week. The Temple helped me to realize what a blessing the Gospel of Jesus Christ is. He is there for me, and he has felt everything that I am feeling – good and bad. He knows the pains that I feel when I'm sick, he knows the sadness I feel when things aren't going so well, and he knows the stress I feel every day. Jesus Christ is there for me and you, and all we have to do is ask for his help.


In other news, I went to my very first concert last night! I know...it's a little sad. I'm 20 years old, and I'm just going to my first concert (unless you count school concerts and the like). But it was a BLAST!!! I saw The Hush Sound, The Spill Canvas and One Republic last 
night, and it was awesome! I first heard about The Hush Sound on a poster for this concert, and they have since become my all-time favorite band. They're up-beat and happy in contrast to many other bands out there today. Do you want to know the best part of it all? I GOT TO MEET THEM!!! The Hush Sound came up for pictures and autographs after they were done. Anywho...I'll post a couple videos of the concert later...as soon as I can convert them to the right file type...Peace Out!