Mind Your language

It’s really shocking for parents to hear their innocent and sweet children suddenly one day start using swear words as part of their conversation. This is a highly prevalent problem that often perplexes parents who are lost on how and why the child’s vocabulary has suddenly expanded to include these atrocious words.

Usually children begin swearing when they hear adults doing it. We all know that kids are like sponges who absorb everything that they see and hear in their environment. They may be copying mom, dad, any other adult, a sibling or friends at school. Sometimes children also swear to get attention. Younger kids are looking for their parent’s attention and swearing is one surefire way of getting it.
The first thing to do when you observe your child swearing is check your own language. It is not fair to expect your children not to use these words if you are regularly using them. Kids always model parent behaviours, thus if you want them to monitor their language, you have to monitor yours.
If you are not the one using bad language try to look into the other sources that might be influencing your child’s language like Television, Friends, Neighbours or Relatives. Try to keep your child away from the source as far as possible.
Establish clear rules about swearing with your child. Make it clear to your child that such words are not permissible at home. If your child is using these words when angry, try to teach him or her healthy ways of expressing emotions especially when they are frustrated or angry. This is especially true for younger children who most likely don’t understand the meaning of the words they use. Also, explaining to children the meaning of the words usually makes them stop since they now understand the vulgarity of the expressions.
Don’t feed in your child’s bad habit. If your kids are swearing in order to get attention, yelling at them or reprimanding them in any other way is just going to increase the frequency of the behaviour. A calmer approach usually works here. Ignore your child’s behaviour at that time and instead give him or her attention when behaving in a desired manner.
It is very distressing for parents to hear their kids use language that is inappropriate. Parents have an obligation to raise their kids properly by teaching them the right values.It is not easy being a good parent, we all know this, but we need to try our best to understand our children and guide them in their formative years in order for them to have a comfortable future!!

Cuba Baca

MARI MEMBACA

Anda perlu rajin menyediakan rangsangan sekiranya mahu anak cepat membaca. Jika anda mula lambat, maka lambatlah anak itu membaca. Ada yang menghantar anak ke tadika semasa berumur 5 tahun dan mengandaikan guru tadika 'do all the jobs' sedangkan anak itu tidak tahu apa-apa. Bila berlalu tiga bulan, datang ke tadika pot pet pot pet komplen kenapa anak dia abc pun tak kenal-kenal lagi. Janganlah begitu yang oi. Pembelajaran bermula di rumah seawal bayi lagi. Nak anak pandai, kenalah rajin sikit. Eh. rajin banyak.

Untuk mengajar membaca bahasa inggeris, gunakan kaedah phonics dan look and say. Sesiapa yang tak tahu apa itu phonics rajin-rajinlah menggoogle. Membaca tak perlu kenal alphabets. Tak perlu tunggu anak kenal ABC baru ajar membaca sebab ABC itu hanya huruf-huruf yang tidak mempuyai makna. Yang ada makna ialah bunyi kepada huruf-huruf itu. Cari CD di kedai yang ada mengajar bunyi-bunyi ini.  Kalau tak pun, dalam internet ni memang banyak web yang mengajar anak membaca cara phonics ini. Layari saja.

Perkataan look and say itu sendiri sudah menjawab cara mengajar kaedah kedua. Anak-anak melihat perkataan dan kemudian menyebutnya. Anda perlu menyediakan kad berukuran lebih kurang 4x10 inci. Box card paling bagus. Kalau tidak ada, guna saja manila card yang agak keras. Di atas kad itu anda tulis perkataan yang hendak anda tayang-imbaskan kepada anak. Tulisan mesti besar dan terang. Kalau ada template huruf kecil, bagus. Kalau tak ada, boleh saja anda print dari komputer. Guna marker pen pun boleh tapi biarlah tulisan itu cantik dan senang dibaca.

Kaedah ini anda boleh gunakan ketika anak masih bayi. Walaupun dia belum boleh menyebut, dia sudah boleh melihat. Mulakan perkataan yang berhampiran dengan dirinya: Body parts, family, things around the house. Atau anda boleh saja imbaskan 'high frequency words' atau 'dolch words' - iaitu perkataan yang sering kita jumpa apabila membaca. Di bawah ini adalah senarai high frequency words mengikut keutamaan. Anda boleh gunakan perkataan dalam senarai ini.

Preprimer	Primer	First	Second	Third
a	all	after	always	about
and	am	again	around	better
away	are	an	because	bring
big	at	any	been	carry
blue	ate	as	before	clean
can	be	ask	best	cut
come	black	by	both	done
down	brown	could	buy	draw
find	but	every	call	drink
for	came	fly	cold	eight
funny	did	from	does	fall
go	do	give	don't	far
help	eat	going	fast	full
hers	four	had	first	got
I	get	has	five	grow
in	good	her	found	hold
is	has	him	gave	hot
it	he	how	goes	hurt
jump	into	just	green	if
little	like	know	its	keep
look	must	let	made	kind
make	new	live	many	laugh
me	no	may	off	light
my	now	of	or	long
not	on	old	pull	much
one	our	once	read	myself
play	out	open	right	never
red	please	over	sing	only
run	pretty	put	sit	own
said	ran	round	sleep	pick
see	ride	some	tell	seven
the	saw	stop	their	shall
three	say	take	these	show
to	she	thank	those	six
two	so	them	upon	small
up	soon	then	us	start
we	that	think	use	ten
yellow	there	walk	very	today
you	they	where	wash	together
	this	when	which	try
	too		why	warm
	under		wish
	want		work
	was		would
	well		write
	went		your
	what
	white
	who
	will
	with
	yes

Sekiranya anak anda sudah berumur 2 tahun ke atas, di samping menggunakan perkataan di dalam senarai anda juga boleh menggunakan buku bacaan siri Lady Bird berjodol "Peter and Jane". Mulakan buku 1A dan teruskan denga 2A, 3A, 4A dan seterusnya.

Cubalah dulu. Berikan feedbacak kepada kakpah. Kalau ada pertanyaan, jangan malu menulis dalam ruang komen atau dalam kotak shout box.

My Child is Telling Lies

For most parents discovering that their child tells lies is upsetting and can be traumatic.Children and adults can lie in all sorts of ways. Not all of them are harmful or wrong.

It’s been said that almost all young children ‘lie’. In other words, for young children up to the age of about five or six lying is probably more ‘normal’ than ‘abnormal’. There are two good reasons for this:

First, a young child’s conscience works differently to that of an older child or adult. Older children and adults are able to work out before they do something whether doing it is a good thing or not. Young children are only able to work this out after they have done something.

Second, children love to fantasize. Children making up stories about what happened and exaggerating parts of those stories is absolutely normal. It is to do with their excitement about being able to talk and, to a degree, about being in control of their own lives. So what appears to be lying can just be children being children.

Lying as ‘white lies’

It may seem strange to say but most parents teach their children to lie. Think of a family visit to a relation or friend. Your child has been bored all afternoon and doesn’t like your friends or
their children. But it’s quite likely that when you leave, you’ll expect your child to say, ‘Thanks, I’ve had a nice time’. Think of opening a birthday present. However disappointing the present might be, most of us are still expected to say, ‘Thanks, it’s lovely’ and we expect our children to say the same. So politeness can also include an element of lying, which is why we use the term ‘white lie’. It’s a lie which it’s OK to tell. But children have to learn this – they don’t know it automatically. So in trying to be the best parents we can, we may actually be confusing our children about lying instead of helping them.

Lying as defence
Whenever we tell lies it’s usually because we are on the defensive. We may be nervous about getting found out. We may be frightened of the person who is confronting us. We may be supporting a friend or colleague. Children are no different. Children ‘learn’ to lie when what happens when they tell the truth is worse than what would happen if they got away with a lie. In such cases, children aren’t just lying for the sake of it – they are lying to prevent something which they know or imagine to be worse happening to them. Children who lie continuously do so because they have ‘learnt’ only too well that it is easier to lie than to tell the truth.

Things you can do to help your child to tell the truth:
Set the best example you can. Whenever possible, tell your child the truth so that he or she doesn’t feel let down or disappointed too often.

Try to understand the reason for the ‘lying’. If it’s harmless fantasy, it can also be fun.

Don’t respond too negatively when your child tells the truth. If they have done something wrong, it’s quite right to let your child know you are displeased. But it isn’t helpful to get very angry. Next time, your child will wonder whether it’s worth telling the truth after all.

When your child tells the truth, make it clear that you are proud of him or her.
Let your child know you are disappointed when he or she lies.

Work out the situation in which your child is lying. Very few children lie all the time about
everything. So identify the situations in which your child lies and think about how those
situations have cropped up.

Read your child stories and fairytales in which telling the truth is emphasized. Fables like ‘The
Boy Who Cried Wolf’ are useful.

Make sure your child knows that you still love him or her. If a child has self-respect, he or she
won’t feel the need to lie as much. Remember that it’s easier to help a child not to lie than it is to stop a child who lies a lot of the time. If your child does lie all the time, ask for some professional help. There is usually an underlying reason which needs to be helped not hidden.

To Sum Up
Children, like adults, can tell lies for a variety of reasons. It is important that you understand why your child might tell a lie so that you can work at supporting your child and encouraging him or her to trust in you and be open with you.