Why do we love?

hello once in such a long time.

so many things have happened since my last entry.there wont be even enough to describe all the events that unfolded in my life.

was in 1t20 for the first three months in cj-mad buncha people.insanely friendly and adventurous-always crossing to new lands unsearched-remember tiong chew and martin in skirts-0martin can cross his legs pretty well as a "girl" in skirts.after pe showers, hanging out in the grandstand with gabby,bev,phil,jane and fel,crapping with the girls like anabelle,terri,sutha.the morning table chats:wai mun, benji,jesse,bev,gabby,phil,morgan(who pretends to be mr tough but otherwise is not very good at),royston(lame) (1t19),where i first realised that phil and benji are highly tickle-sensitiveso pokes to them from me are as often as i can. : ))doodling on phil's notes in bio,him falling asleep during nearly every class with me trying to wake him up,and wai mooooon trying to help him fend off my "wake up pokes","miss buffay,why cant you fly?"... there was so much laughter and freedom in those days.heart to heart.

dont get me wrong, i'm still laughing a whole tremendous lot these days.my new jae class 1t32 classmates poke the laughter outta me alll the time,especially michelle and violet dear,whom i think can account for me interjecting so much chinese and hokkien dialect into my english sentences-haha,i know samuel cant take my chinese thing any longer.violet and chee weng my dc,just make me laugh all the time, watching how they are deniably attracted to creating trouble for each other.the line between love and hate is so thin. and violet ALWAYS denying facts about chee weng and her, always aiming to dear innocent zhi yan.but zhi yan's a candy shop owner-so sweet,how else can she be warped right??(eeeerrrr)..

our crazy htc who bangs himself into walls and writes decent but melancholic poetry on the whiteboard,who manages to say the names of girls like a perv...a perv with a waking up problem.brandon's in my class too,the boy who's indifferent to whether his boxers show or not,with colourful socks everyday.who shall sing the next sopranino part we get : ) michelle and i are mad-officially mad.she laughs over every chinese word that i write over the phone-and looks at me and WE both burst out laughing.violet responses to tickles are like phil's too(EXTREMELY sensitive,chee weng,get the hint?)

haha,see i'm getting more and more hyped each day.michelle and i poke each other(whether verbally or literally) to keep each other awake.violet's a form of positive peer pressure on me-during bio, i can sit through the lecture PAYING attention : )) mich and i shld sit next to her more often.

well,now we're on the topic of the cca i joined band. this place, is filled with aLL sorts of insane,mentally unstable people from imh-all with varying degrees of insanity,nevertheless the insanity's assured.first and foremost, my section is filled with 2 nirvanan state of retardedness nutcases,(fondly known as bobby and sly),a retard with the level of 89 called brandon,(closing up to a 100 soon), a retard who refuses to admit she's a retard,(her name's sam btw), anothr 2 insane people called nic and shern way, and a retarded ah beng called samuel(who's character's not ah beng, but it's the way he sits lah).i have also become retarded,at a level of 49,thanks to the 2 nirvanan retards.become very dialetic in my verbal speech, and often laugh my head off,at both sams and brandon.and stretched to deranged by nic and shern way.bobby and syl have worked so hard teaching me, and both sams in encouraging me.though words fly out like it's no one business,the cuts usually heal very fast thanks to the Lord, please forgive us for the cuts we have inflicted unknowingly upon one another : )) thank God for giving me friends who have been a blessing to me in my life, please bless each and everyone of them with Your Love as You have given me. though i may not be seen as smart,or might even be seen as silly, please help me Lord not to frustrate them.

GUIN and JOCEY are in band too! with VALERIE!hahaha,yay!Jesus Lord, thank You for all of them , and also maddie and bella,val,mich,sam,samuel,inez and jerina dear too.My life in Your hands has become filled with Your abundant grace that You lead them to bring in my life.samuel's so funny to watch,his reactions always so big,inez and i ka chiau him at the piano.though some people like jeremy toh and xun dong have gone from band, and though i miss my "sister" sometimes,God has given me so much more to continue in this race.rishi, faeliq,chu ern and jerina's still around, seeing more sides as time passes,with other new people added,like jiffsen, i have acquired much,like laughter,stronger will that the Lord gives to battle on-in a way, i feel more at home here than in ij band,but no one is perfect that i have to remember always.we all have our flaws,and our sins,but i pray that the Lord will change us to become more and more to be like Jesus,a prince who became a servant,who was rich and became poor for the Love of His people.

btw, i changed from tenor sax to baritone sax.thank You Lord that You know when I am down,when my spirit is broken,that You never fail to be my comfort and my strength.Your love is around me even when others retract their love from me.thank You for lifting me from the pit and restoring my life. Lord, i dont know what the roads are before me, but i know surely that this is Your will.please lead me in Your ways Lord, as You will,not as mine.Lord i surrender completely to You.in Jesus holy name,Amen.