Mixed & Random Stories

Salam,



In this post rasa nak kongsi different stories ...


A/Addicted to Wii Mario Kart Game

Lately myself and Kam telah menjadi semakin addicted untuk mendapatkan medals di dalam Wii Mario Kart Game grand prix level and it's like having a playtime shifts, lepas aku, Kam akan main and vice versa XD and even at times we combined force & play as a team :o) Alhamdulillah both of us sudah berjaya menghabiskan grand prix 50cc and sekarang ni trying to finish up yg 100cc kekeke..

Yang paling best, by the end of the champion atu ada la kena acknowledge with a picture of our Mii.. and Below's mine.. *LoL*

B/ Visit to Gilesgate by opportunity



I've always wanted to give K.Zila who used to stay in Bowburn a visit since dia dah pindah ke kawasan gilesgate. Then an opportunity came when all my housemates were so worried regarding the swine flu dilemma. Panjang ceritanya but alhamdulillah semua -ve. Btw, I volunteered to take their prescriptions @ Sunderland road, Whitfields' Pharmacy near to Gilesgate. Sungguh2 it makes me realized that aku sudah lama inda buat exercise, not even jalan2 that far except jalan2 dalam rumah saja. The last was while in Reading. Bad.. So bad, that's why hampir2 surrender lemak2 kat kaki untuk melangkah.. Hehe. Pastu dah la aku mengada-ngada jalan from Bus station to gilesgate melalui jalan through city melintas gala theatre, naik jambatan and naik ke gilesgate, melintasi Sainsbury baru sampai ke pharmacy to. Well, that's my first time. Hehehe. Anyway, I've got my own reasons why I used those path.


So, lepas ambil ubat2, menyinggah di Sainsbury shopping barang nak bwk to K.zila's house n includes personal stuffs ;oP Then after shopping gi her house, we had high tea - bubur ayam! sandwich mortadella yg aku bawak, water crackers + blueberries plus cranberries cheese, anggur and pringles. Fuhh hebatnyeee makan.. Lepak2 kat kitchen then lepak kat her room and then I realized ada pohon Roses kat backyard. Tu yg terus bwk sesi photoshoot belakang rumah.. Giler cantek kalau buat bbq kat sana.. tapi terpaksa la buang lalang2 dulu.. hehe.. Picture aku dah simpan in my previous blog entry =)

After the melepak session, sedar2 dah dekat nak jam 7pm. Nk kejar bus lagi so aku dengan berat hati balik. Rasa nk sleepover je tapi mengenangkan sahabat2 yg memerlukan ubat2 diorang, went home. Masa balik ni aku guna short cut yg terpaksa melintas school of edu. Tempat yg banyak sangat kenangan. The path that I used to jalan ngan Zeah & Zatul dulu.. Sedihnyee mengenang semua tu.. Then sampai2 bus stop at three tuns hotel, bus lama lagi nak sampai so I made up my mine gi bus station tunggu. Nasib sempat, came early kat station, tunggu la 10mins camtu.

Sampai2 rumah, beloved housemates + PR tgh siapkan dinner. Walaupun maseh kenyang, can't resist makanan and masakan yg sedap tu. Tq Amalina for cooking! Sedapnyeee makan nasi lemak. Thanks also Kam & K.Nur sebab x kisah aku balik lambat ngan ur medicines. Wahhh ni yg x reti nk berhenti makan, badan pun dah menjadi-jadi.. hehe. Diet.. Diet ! =P

C/ Botanic Garden, Durham

Alhamdulillah sampai jugak akhirnya hajat untuk melawat Botanic garden walaupun x puas hati coz terpaksa balik cepat.. whoooppsss.. Tapi insyaALLAH next time ada lagi.

Sebenarnya plan nak gi this garden dah lama tertanam di dasar hati tapi last tym terpaksa di cancel atas sebab2 berjaga-jaga & mencegah. Oh how I wish K.Nur ada join kitorang.. (and zeah, nurul...)*sigh*

It's so lovely, the greenery, sgt menenangkan... Sempat la kitorang ambil gambar2.. and ponteng dalam membantu pembikinan video clip Lutfi. Aku simpan satu dua gambar je as sample.. ahaks..

p/s apasal aku suka ngan lalang akhir2 ni..?

D/ Perempuan Berkalung Sorban

I've been waiting for some free time to watch the DVD I brought and bought from Brunei. Since Kam & Amalina dah tgk aku pun nk tgk juga and share my feelings towards the story. You all should watch it. Cerita yg penuh ngan emosi. Aku masa tgk sungguh ada rasa benci, sedih, geram & macam2 lagi..

And then aku memang dah jatuh cinta ngan lagu soundtrack the movie by Siti Nurhaliza/Opick - Ketika Cinta before I actually watched the movie and then I discovered another soundtrack from the same movie that I fell in love with..

Tajuk/Lirik lagu: Batasku, Asaku

Penyanyi: Siti Nurhaliza

Bila kutercipta dari tulang rusukmu
Mengapa ku mampu sempurnakan hidupmu
Bila ku ada karena kau ada
Mengapa kau tak bisa sendiri saja

(*)
Dalam teguh tak larut belaian
Ranum sahaja bukan hiasan
Untaian cinta gapai genggaman
Yakinkan mimpi dalam iman

Batasku sadari raut kodratku
Asaku menari terbalut sorbanmu
Lembutnya jiwa sambut nestapa
Terngiang syahdu iman di dada

Bila cerita tak lagi ceria
Mahligai cinta merona terlena
Senada iman kusimpan derita
Kuatkan hati bersimpuh padaNya…

hoo.. uuuuu…. hoo….
(Ulang *)

InsyaALLAH till next blog

Butuh Kekuatan Untuk Meneruskan Hidup ~

Assalamualaikum,

Pernahkah kamu terfikir andai hidup kamu umpama lalang yg bisa tumbuh di merata tempat dan bebas menari-nari mengikut arah tuju angin yg meniupmu?

Atau adakah kehidupan umpama sekuntum bunga ros yg tumbuh cantik namun agak terhad pergerakkannya dikelilingi dedaun hijau dan sentiasa terpelihara oleh duri yg tumbuh di dahanmu yg engkau inginkan?

Itu semua terpulang kepadamu duhai teman2 sekalian. Secara jujur, aku sendiri tidak pasti kehidupan bagaimana yang aku inginkan: seperti lalang ataupun seperti bunga ros. Namun yg aku tahu bahawa dalam hidup ini kita hanya mampu merancang, namun yg mana mengetahui atas apa yg akan terjadi di hari seterusnya dan menentukan segalanya hanyalah ALLAH s.w.t jua.

Aku tidak nafikan aku pernah merasa ingin berputus asa sahaja. Lupakan segala impian ku ini dan mulakan kehidupan yang baru. Tapi adakah itu sebenarnya yang aku inginkan ataupun hanya kata hati yg berbicara walaupun pada hakikatnya di dasar hati, itu adalah merupakan jalan yg terakhir yg akan aku pilih. Sudah berkali-kali aku Redha dan seringkali mengingatkan diri ini bahawa aku sangat lemah.. seorang insan yang lemah, yg belum cukup keimanan di dada dan sudah tentu aku amat takut sekiranya nyawa ini di ambil di ketika iman ini belum mencukupi. Ya ALLAH, aku amat takut menemuiMu dalam keadaan yang belum bersedia. Aku amat takut kepada Neraka JahanamMu dan aku amat dambakan SyurgaMu Ya ALLAH.

Bukan sekali tapi sudah semakin kerap ku terfikir akan kehidupan selepas mati. Kehidupan di dalam alam kubur dan kehidupan hakiki di akhirat kelak. Adakah aku bersedia? Jawapanku sejujurnya, aku belum bersedia. Oleh itu wahai teman-temanku marilah kita sama2 untuk memperbaiki diri dan meningkatkan iman di dada untuk bekal di akhirat kelak dan aku harap kita sama2 tidak alpa dengan kehidupan dunia yg hanya sementara ini.

Akan tetapi, ini tidak bermakna kita hanya perlu memikirkan salah satu: antara dunia & akhirat sahaja. Aku rasa kita perlu pandai seimbangkan kedua-duanya. ALLAH s.w.t lahirkan kita di bumi ini bersebab dan semuanya tertakluk kepada cara setiap individu menjalani dan mengharungi kehidupan masing2 sehingga bila sampai waktunya untuk kita dipanggil menghadap Illahi suatu hari kelak. Dan aku harap bila waktu aku sampai nanti, aku telahpun bersedia untuk menghadapi kehidupan yang lebih sempurna di alam yang berbeza & sudah pasti alam yang kekal selamanya di bawah lindungan ALLAH s.w.t, insyaALLAH.

Dan untuk mengakhiri post entry ku kali ini, aku kongsikan dan untuk renungan kita bersama:

KATA-KATA NASIHAT IBNU QAYYIM

* Di dalam hati manusia ada kekusutan dan tidak akan terurai kecuali menerima kehendak ALLAH s.w.t.

* Di dalam hati manusia ada keganasan dan tidak akan hilang kecuali berjinak dengan ALLAH s.w.t.

* Di dalam hati manusia ada kesedihan dan tidak akan hilang kecuali seronok mengenali ALLAH s.w.t.

* Di dalam hati manusia ada kegelisahan dan tidak akan tenang damai kecuali berlindung, bertemu dan berjumpa denganNya.

* Di dalam hati manusia ada penyesalan dan tidak akan padam kecuali redha dengan suruhan dan laranganNya serta qadha dan qadarNya serta kesenantiasaan sabar sehingga menemuiNya.

* Di dalam hati manusia ada hajat dan tidak akan terbendung kecuali kecintaan kepadaNya dan bermohon kepadaNya.

* Kesentiasaan berzikir kepadaNya adalah keikhlasan sebenar kepadaNya....... Andai dunia dan isinya diberikan kepada manusia masih tidak lagi dapat membendung hajat hati si hamba itu.

"Semoga kita semua sentiasa dilindungi dan sentiasa dalam keredhaanNya jua"

-AMIN -

100 truths - by nursyeffarni

I was reading Mann's (a friend I met a few years back) blog and came across these questions and since aku xde apa2 nak buat, so here it goes...

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage: Oren Sunquick buatan sendiri wif ice =)
2. Last phone call: Amalina (Durham)
3. Last text message: Kak Zila (Durham)
4. Last song you listened to: D'Massive - Di antara Kalian
5. Last time you cried: Today, tetiba teringat arwah grandpa, semoga rohnya di tempatkan bersama org2 yg beriman. Amin.

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice: No
7. Been cheated on: No
8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Nope
9. Lost someone special: Yes and it's still hard to accept
10. Been depressed: Lots of time
11. Been drunk and threw up: No

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLOURS:
12. Rainbow
13. Green
14. Black

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2009)
15. Made a new friend: Yes, just met one during UIF cultural day (20/06)
16. Fallen out of love: No, in love pun tak.. hehe
17. Laughed until you cried: Yes
18. Met someone who changed you: No
19. Found out who your true friends were: Yes
20. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes
21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: No
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Not sure.. friend list fb ke ni?
23. How many kids do you want to have : At least a pair
24. Do you have any pets: Yes
25. Do you want to change your name: Nope
26. What did you do for your last birthday: Double celebration with my parents' anniversary and treat bestest friends for lunch
27. What time did you wake up today: 11++ am, lambat masuk tido la.. haha
28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Online maseh
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: Balik Brunei!
30. Last time you saw your Mother: 25 May 2009
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Terlalu banyak..
32. What are you listening to right now: Afgan - Terima Kasih Cinta
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Don't think so
34. What's getting on your nerves right now: People who doesn't understands
35. Most visited webpage: www.hotmail.com
36. Whats your real name: Arni @ Nur Syahidah Nazeefah binti Haji Sulaiman
37. Nicknames: Arni, Effa, Ni, Nursyeffa, Nursyeffarni
38. Relationship Status: Single
39. Zodiac sign: Aries
40. Male or female? Female
41. Elementary?: Bakti Dewa School & Sekolah Rendah Kiarong
42. Middle School?: Maktab Sains P.S.B.S
43. High school/college?: Maktab Sains P.S.B.S
44. Hair colour: Black
45. Long or short: Long
46. Height: 5" something
47. Do you have a crush on someone?: Yup
48. What do you like about yourself?: Not sure tapi bersyukur dengan kurniaan-Nya
49. Piercings: 2 kat telinga je
50. Tattoos: None
51. Righty or lefty: Righty

FIRSTS :
52. First surgery: None, minta dijauhi
53. First piercing: Masa masih kecik2
54. First best friend: Can't remember the name
55. First sport you joined: Rentas Desa kot..
56. First vacation: A combined travel to S'pore & M'sia back in 1990
58. First pair of trainers: Don't remember

RIGHT NOW
59. Eating: None
60. Drinking: None
61. I'm about to: Go to sleep
62. Listening to: Merindukanmu - D'masiv
63. Waiting on: to finish up sending pictures to my friends and cuz

YOUR FUTURE :
64. Want kids?: Yes
65. Get Married?: Yes, kalau ada jodoh, insyaAllah
66. Career?: An excellent teacher

WHICH IS BETTER :
67. Lips or eyes: Eyes
68. Hugs or kisses: Hugs
69. Shorter or taller: Taller
70. Older or Younger: Older
71. Romantic or spontaneous: Both
72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Doesn't matter
73. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive
74. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship
75. Trouble maker or hesitant: Hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER :
76. Kissed a stranger: No
77. Drank hard liquor: No
78. Lost glasses/contacts: No
79. Sex on first date: No
80. Broken someone's heart: Maybe?
82. Been arrested: No
83. Turned someone down: Nope
84. Cried when someone died: Yes
85. Fallen for a friend?: Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself: Yes
87. Miracles: Yes
88. Love at first sight: Yup
89. Heaven: Yes
90. Santa Claus: Nope
91. Kiss on the first date : No
92. Angels: Yes

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: Nope
95. Did you sing today?: Yes
96. Ever cheated on somebody?: No
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go?: August 2007
98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be?: 11 April 2008
99. Are you afraid of falling in love?: A lil' bit
100. Posting this as 100 truths?: Yup

-Nursyeffarni in Durham-

GooDBye Reading... I am Back in Durham

Assalamualaikum,

Kehilangan kata-kata untuk dijadikan ayat membuatkan post aku banyak yg menjadi pending dan terpaksa di defer publication nyer.. Post entry ni tertangguh sejak kembalinya aku dari Reading.. on the 19th June 2009..

Mari menyambung karangan ni.. Sejak..

Sejak kepulangan ku ke Durham, everything's back to my "normal" life. I am so glad to be around my housemates & the familiar surroundings BUT I missed Reading city so much, missing the walks to the city and back to my cuz's home. Mizah, I still miss you guys, Wii sessions & Reading city!

Sabtu (20th June 09), we (me n housemates - K.nur & Kam) went to the UIF day in Ustinov, an event they called Creative Diversity Day and we (Me & Kam) came as guests since Brunei inda involved in the event so we supported our neighbouring country, Malaysia instead. Lagipun, we have strong bonds with fellow Malaysians friends & Neighbours :o)

We arrived at Howlands' Building at around 4 pm and browse around the building visiting and took a peek at every stalls and stayed close to the M'sians' stalls most of the time. The music in fact was too loud for me and making it worst, the M'sians' stall were placed next to the sound system.

However, we had fun.. going around, babysitting Iffah (she still remembers us and most of the time that cute little girl will come to us and hold our hands so that we will bring her around). Let me share with you all the picture of me n Iffah:

There were impressive things shown during the cultural day and I even had my name written in chinese:There are so many things to say about the UIF but I'll just skip that.. anyway, some pictures during my departure from Reading (at the train station) and shots in my cuz's house... Here you go....

Me @ their living room =)

The three of us =D

Again us at the train station..

Bye2 Cuz & Fuad.. TQ so much for your kind great hospitality sepanjang almost seminggu in Reading =)

-Till We Meet Again -

Last Few Days in Reading

Assalamualaikum,

Alhamdulillah I am back in Durham. Arrived safely on Friday June 19th around 2++pm.

Let me juz blog about what happened during my last few days in Reading... a city I have fallen in love with...

I actually planned to went back to Durham on the afternoon of June 18th however, thinking that I will arrived at 10.30pm and I don't think I could bring myself down to the city and find a taxi b'coz barang2 aku macam bertambah dengan tidak disangka-sangka (haha) and so I went to the train station and asked about my off-peak return (not London route) ticket boleh digunakan at anytime ke or ada specific time. So, lepas tahu je dat I can use it any time, I made up my mind balik the next morning so that I could hop into a taxi just outside the Durham train station yg available mostly di waktu siang.

Therefore, after menjenguk Reading train station, I took the opportunity untuk stroll around the city for the last time. Bought Krispy Kreme doughnuts untuk makan di Durham.

Ohhh, sebelum terlupa, akhirnya due to extra time aku ambil peluang untuk melawat Forbury garden, a small but nice garden near the city center. Maafkan quality gambar, gambar sendiri la punya quality, hehe XD

On the previous days, 17th, I went around the Uni area and see most of the places. Thanks to Mizah n Fuad for temankan visit the uni sites. As we went further, we arrived at the river.. I dunno the name tapi it's a very lovely scenery tapi inda sampai round coz it starts raining ;oD Below: Pictures of me, mizah n fuad around the university sites:

i. The lake.. do we call it lake or river? hehe

ii. Us berlatar belakangkan Mizah's department: Soil Science

iii. Using timer at the greenery area near Mizah's department.. It's so lovely!

On the 16th, I went for a visit to the Museum & Art Gallery around the city center and near to the twon hall. It's free admission. Thankfully inda ramai orang, so I set the timer and took pictures of me.. haha XD It's so nice.. but a bit creepy la coz pegi sorang2 hehe =P

iv. Museum 3rd floor.. can't remember what it was =P

v. Me on the 2nd floor of the Museum, area pasal Romans and all.. Just stroll around, x baca pun apa yg tertulis haha.

I had so much fun. To Mizah & Fuad if you are reading this post. TQ so much for your hospitality n lovely food. I am missing the routines now. Don't feel bad coz inda dapat temankan kaka around. I enjoy myself so much!!

More stories about my final day in Reading and departure on the next blog.

Till then..

-- OFF To UIF in Ustinov, Durham --

Kau Tiada Pengganti...

Assalamualaikum,

16 June 2009 [12.39am]

Aku di ketika ini masih berada di Reading. Ketika ini aku sedang memaksa diri untuk berjaga to wait for Subuh prayer supaya aku tidak perlu bangun at 4++am by blogging here and at the same time listening to my lappy punya playlist. Alhamdulillah, sejak kehadiran ku di sini aku semakin tenang dalam menerima hakikat dan redha dengan pemergian nenekanda tersayang. I know I will never ever forget and will never stop missing him ever tetapi, kehidupan perlu diteruskan.

Yesterday (15th June 09)...

After Zuhur prayer I went strolling around Reading City Center by myself. Since my cuz n bf brought me there the day before plus it's a non-complicated city similar to Durham, I easily make my way to the city and enjoying the scenery and doing some window shopping AND minor shopping haha.. Can't resist the sales =P and then after a few hours going here and there, stopped at costa for a hot choc n tuna melt (missing costa sessions with zeah so much) and then sambung lagi window shopping at debenhams and eventually bought something there.

It was raining when I stepped out of Debenhams going home to Highgrove Street and stopping over at Tesco Express to buy juice and finally arrived home 5 mins after my cuz arrived from Uni back home as well. Right timing! =D We had dinner before Maghrib prayer. I feel so spoiled here. My cuz's bf prepared my breakfast and dinner while I play a minor role helping around with cooking vegies and when needed.

Today, just like today, after Zuhur prayer, I planned to visit the Museum & Art Gallery in the city center area and perhaps some shopping therapy again? hehehe. Bad Girl! XD The next day might as well visit Reading Uni and soon I'll be back in Durham to reunite with my deskfan (haha) and especially with my beloved housemates. InsyaAllah I will go and memeriahkan UIF with the M'sian's community on June the 20th.

Pictures taken around Reading City Center (14 June 2009)

a. Gambar di main entrance di city

b. The 3 of us few meters away from main entrance haha XD

c. At the bridge menuju ke Oracle, gedung membeli belah... Can you spot... :Krispy kreme??!! hehehe..

d. Another area of shopping places. It reminds me of Leicester's city center. Can you spot any differences? hint: Someone's been shopping. hehehe XD

e. At the town hall building and next to it is the Museum & Art gallery that I am planning to go to today.. Can't wait!! *iski*

p/s More photos will be uploaded to My FB when I have the time, insyaALLAH.

Another an hour left for Subuh.. I can do this!! Anyway, on the train on my way to Reading last time while I was listening to my mp3 player, I came across one song which I feel so touched listening to and I feel it suits on how I felt after the loss of my grandpa on the 11th of June 09. Baca bait2 lagu ini or even listen to the song then you'll understand..

Lagu: Saat Terakhir - ST12

Tak pernah terpikir olehku

Tak sedikitpun ku bayangkan

Kau akan pergi tinggalkan kusendiri

Begitu sulit kubayangkan

Begitu sakit ku rasakan

Kau akan pergi tinggalkan ku sendiri

Dibawah batu nisan kini

Kau tlah sandarkan

Kasih sayang kamu begitu dalam

Sungguh ku tak sanggup

Ini terjadi karna ku sangat cinta

Inilah saat terakhirku melihat kamu

Jatuh air mataku menangis pilu

Hanya mampu ucapkan

Selamat jalan kasih

Satu jam saja

Ku telah bisa cintai kamu kamu kamu di hatiku

Namun bagiku melupakanmu butuh waktuku seumur hidup

Satu jam saja kutelah bisa sayangi kamu..... di hatiku

Namun bagiku lupakanmu butuh waktuku seumur hidup...

(Dedicated to Mulah Nini Hj Nayan b Kahar & Mulah Tua Hj Akil b Hj Nayan)

Then another song especially dedicated to beloved friends..

Lagu: Sahabat - Aizat

Sahabat…

Mengapa kau pergi

Tinggal aku sendiri

Kau tahu ku tak sanggup

Sahabat…

Ingat lah kau slalu

Jadi yang terbaik

Walau kau tak disini lagi

Sahabat…

Aku rindu padamu

Datang walau sesaat

Ku ingin kan kau hadir

Aku disini dan menunggu

Diam tanpa dirimu

Kau tahu ku tak bisa

Beranjak terbang dan melayang

Tanpa diri mu ku tak bisa dan kembalilah...

(Dedicated to Zeah, Nurul, Mis... I miss you girls so much.. so much! And I also miss my housemates, k,nur & kam, Dij... *sigh*)

Currently in Reading...

Assalamualaikum,

13th June 2009...

Blog ini ku tulis semasa dalam perjalanan ke reading, uk to meet my cousin, Mizah who shared the loss of our grandfather (refer previous blog) as her mom n mine are siblings and we planned a Tahlil n bacaan yassin ceremony for our beloved late grandpa, insyaAllah. Doakan semuanya terlaksana ya (alhamdulillah , done!)

I thought train crosscountry ada wireless tapi kecewanya… I mean I was planning to go online during the 4++ hrs journey tapi inda apalah. I will just go on shout out my thoughts in Microsoft words and I will post it once I got the next wireless connection.

My trip to Reading was actually a spontaneous act. I have always wanted to travel to reading and visit my cousin but the time inda mengizinkan before and I have never expected that eventually and sadly the loss of our beloved one would be the reason I finally will have the chance to go down to Reading from Durham.

The past two days experiencing heartbreaking moments, I think myself and my housemates could count how often they can see my smiles n laughters. It’s so hard to even smile when deep inside you are hurt.

No matter how hard I tried not to cry but naturally everytime memories about late grandpa would bring tears. There are just so many things around me that reminds me of him. Ya ALLAH, tabahkanlah hatiku ini. Last night I read the poem my cuz wrote for late grandpa in her blog and it touched my heart so much. And again, the tears fell... *sigh*

-- I stopped blogging after a while when I realized that there won't be any connection at all throughout the journey --

14th June 2009...

Continued from Cuz's crib in Reading in the afternoon. Been out and about to the Reading city center. It’s quite big (compared to Durham that is.. hehe). It is also surrounded by river (like Durham) but the fact that there are Primark, Debenhams, H&M, Tie Rack anddd even Krispy Kreme here makes it so much different from Durham haha XD

Ohh before that let me just recap what happened yesterday after my arrival in Reading. Tq to Mizah & Fuad for fetching me at the train station. It’s quite a huge station, tawakkal all the way and Alhamdulillah I found the correct exit and there they were waiting for me just outside the exit machine. Then wif a taxi, went to their home @ Highgrove Street. A sweet cute basement house (will take pictures of it next time before my departure back to Durham insyaAllah). Last night we eventually laksanakan our main plan, a tahlil n yassin for our late nini laki. Alhamdulillah tercapai jua hajat utama datang ke reading.

Most of our conversations for the past nights were memories recalled back about our family, our sweet childhood memories, we were even laughing remembering all those cute moments. Gauk banar cucu2 nini ani hehehe XD

Ok I'll stop here for what happened during the 2 days in reading and will continue blogging insyaAllah when the ideas are ready to be pour out.

-- Off to Reading City Center for a stroll --

Luvs,
Arni

p/s Kak Nur n Kam, Miss you both already.. Will be back soon insyaAllah. Take Care.

p/p/s TQ Kak Nur for sending me off at the Hare & Greyhound Bus Stop.. Kam, no worries, don't wanna disturb your sleep so we went out as silently as possible ;o)

Inserted...

Picture of Me & Kak Nur @ Bowburn bus stop: Me alone in the CrossCountry Train as the train approaches Oxford, last stop before Reading:

Kau Pergi DiSaat Aku Jauh Darimu...

Assalamualaikum,

Aku dedikasikan blog ini khas buat Allahyarham Nenekanda yang tersayang:

HAJI NAYAN BIN KAHAR

yang telah kembali ke rahmatullah pada pagi 11 June 2009M bersamaan 18 Jamadilakhir 1430H di rumah my bungsu @ kg mata-mata, Brunei.

Sebenarnya jiwaku masih bersedih dengan perkara-perkara personal yang berlaku sebelum ini tetapi deringan telefon Brunei ku di waktu pagi uk sangat-sangat membuat hatiku mula berdebar. Jarang sekali ada orang yang menelefonku di waktu sedemikian dan aku mulai resah selepas aku terlepas untuk menjawab call tersebut. Kemudian kedatangan sms a few minutes after that meruntuhkan & merobek-robek tangkai hatiku. Aku diberitahu bahawa nini laki (nenek lelaki) balah mak aku sudah pergi meninggalkan kami semua. Aku sungguh sedih. Aku tersentap, terdiam dan tiba2 spontaneously airmata ku berderaian. I know it's not a good thing to cry for someone who have left us buat selama-lamanya.

Aku tidak dapat menahan sedih! Semua memory, kenangan yang membabitkan Allahyarham bermain-main di minda ku. Lebih-lebih lagi aku pernah menjaganya di hospital a few months back and the sight of him on my last day in Brunei is playing clearly in my mind. Ya ALLAH, sesungguhnya perkara ini lah yang amat ku risaukan. Aku amat takut kehilangan orang-orang yang ku sayang dan kini apa yang ku takuti itu terjadi jua. Ya ALLAH aku sememangnya lemah. Aku memohon keampunan dariMu Ya ALLAH yang maha pengasih lagi maha penyayang.

Allahyarham nini laki adalah seorang yang bersifat sederhana yang tidak dapat membuang tabiat merokoknya walaupun repeatedly dinasihati. Ya ALLAH, sesungguhnya aku pasti akan menrindui dia. Tempatkanlah dia dan ahli keluarga kami yang telah menghadapMu bersama golongan orang-orang yang beriman Ya ALLAH, AMIN.

Sememangnya pertemuan, perpisahan, ajal, maut ditanganMu Ya ALLAH. It all started back in 2008 when nini laki accidentally knocked on something (which remained a mystery until now) which caused a horizontal deep cut at the back of his head. Eversince that day, his pendengaran and memory deterioriate. He begun to forget so many things and even forgotten who we are sometimes. Then earlier this year (2009), one day nini told my aunt that during his prayer he falls and experienced a short "blacked out" moment.

Eversince that day, he would say that he felt that everytime he stands up, he will feel dizzy. So, after discussions among the daughters, they all agreed to admit grandpa to the hospital and that was when I contributed my time to take care of him for the morning shift. However, grandpa inda tahan staying in the cold place (in which sometimes he thought that he was actually at home) plus the toilet is so far away. Therefore after another discussion, they all agree to bring nini back home and that's when the role of his four daughters came in. They give in their spare time to take care of him, giving him (and grandma as well) shower everyday, giving medicines and taking care of his everything. Nini started to not wanting to eat that much, hanya depended on bubur, at time langsung inda mau makan. Most of the time he spent sleeping on his bed, only at times he woke up when he needed the toilet. Doctors said it is caused by a minor stroke (the dizzyness) and they found traces of darah beku in his head but doesn't require any surgery.

On the day I depart to uk, I still remember that alhamdulillah I had the chance to kiss his hand and look at him, hoping and praying that I could still have the chance to meet him. Tapi ALLAH lebih sayangkan dia. Aku redha dan aku pasrah dengan semua ini. Mudah-mudahan rohnya sentiasa berada di bawah lindungan rahmatMu Ya ALLAH.

I called mom after few minutes trying to calm the tears down but as I hear her voice I began to continue crying. Mom sense that something is wrong, other than the fact that I was sad about the loss of nini but I don't dare tell her when the time is so unsuitable. She sounds so calm.. I envy her strengths wlthough I know deep down inside everyone's sad.

What actually adds up the sadness would be the fact that I am so far away from home, I wasn't there to say the final goodbye, I wasn't there to see him for the last time. However alhamdulillah as told by my cousins everything went well with the pengkebumian. Terima kasih kepada semua yang hadir ke majlis tersebut.

It's not me alone feeling the sadness. I sms-ed my cousin who is studying in reading asking whether she knew about it yet and I received her call a few minutes later and we cried together making it hard to eventually talk normally and at times our words seem to be blurred by the tears. She has not yet knew about it. I know it must be heart breaking to receive such news, as that's what I felt. As for me, I had the chance to last see nini on the 25th of May whereas my cuzins (Mizah n Adib) last saw him in October 2008 and I know how they feel and I can feel how they feel. Cuzzies, we need to be strong.

So, dengan ini AL-Fatihah buat Allahyarham nenekanda kami serta kaum muslimin dan muslimat yang telah pergi meninggalkan kita dan dunia untuk berada di kehidupan yang lebih sempurna di alam yang berbeza. Semoga nini bahagia di sana, AMIN.

Al-Fatihah
^
^
^
^
AMIN

Dari hambaNya yang masih dalam kesedihan,
Arni in Bowburn

The Cold Summer..

Assalamualaikum,

Blog ni sebenarnya pending a few days..

So, aku teruskan je kay =)

Adoiiii letihnya aku menedit, x reti2 bahasa jugak benda ni nak align.. uwaaaa

Giving up upon editing.. here you go..

1/In general

If before I actually mengeluh dengan cuaca yg agak panas but now I miss that hot sunny weather! Aduhhaiii... It is in fact cold (However I still open the bedroom's window every night haha). Cuaca seolah-olah tahu akan perasaanku kini.. Aku di dalam dilemma.. dibelenggu resah dan gelisah tapi hatiku seolah-olah mati untuk menangisi takdir ini. Adakah aku sudah semakin bersedia menempuhi hidupku dihari-hari yang mendatang? Aku sendiri kurang pasti akan hakikat yang tersurat dan tersirat dan hanya ALLAH s.w.t yang maha mengetahui segala-galanya dan aku yakin Dia sedang bersama denganku di saat2 begini dan di setiap saat detik perjalanan hidup setiap hamba-hambaNya. Setelah apa yang berlaku, aku sendiri tidak pasti how to react to it.. Too many things happened in so little time. I'm praying hard, I'm hoping high that it's gonna have a happy ending. AMIN..

Picture 1: Gambar di luar bilik Dijah on the 7th, it's so gloomy...

2/Officially moved in

I have officially moved into the room I use to share with Zeah located downstairs. I moved in the night after k.nur's parents departure back to M'sia. I apologize for the rush to move in. I don't know why but I think I feel much more homely in this room plus I feel more comfortable being near to all my things. Bilik inilah yg banyak meninggalkan kenangan2, manis, pahit, gembira & sedih. Bilik yg menyaksikan deraian airmata, ketegangan, stress, depressions and lots more. Ya ALLAH, aku sebenarnya sedih mengenangkan semua itu tapi ku tabahkan juga hatiku.

Picture 2: My bed together with my boxes to be shipped back to Brunei (hehehe)

Picture 3: My bags yg penuh barang2 entah apa2.. hahaha

3/Emosi terganggu

Sebelum ini aku pernah dengar kata2 orang bahawa sekiranya kita masak, masaklah dengan penuh kasih sayang. Jangan sekali-kali berperasaan yg negative semasa memasak kerana ianya boleh menyebabkan "kekurangan" kepada hasil makanan itu. X pernah pun memikirkan secara mendalam tetapi setelah menyaksikan sendiri insiden seorang teman, rasanya it does have an effect.. hmm, need to find more evidences though. Satu lagi, semalam aku main Lutfi's star board game lagi tapi aku x menang besar! Well, I won 2nd place on the 1st round but kalah dgn hebatnya on the 2nd round. Then we (me & Kam) played Wii games just after midnyte. Aku kalah jugak, aku rasa semua ini macam ada kaitan dengan current emosi aku.. Yeah sure I can still smile, laugh and you might see me having fun, being happy in the outside but deep down inside, I am suffering. Aku rasa sangat kosong. I don;t even know how to think anymore. I feel so empty.. So sad that I feel so weak to even cry. So stressed out that I can't even feel the real feelings of joy anymore.

----- Breaking free from the sad thoughts for a while -----

4/ Spontaneous shopping

TQ kak nur for bringing me along to newcastle. We parked at metrocenter and took the bus to newcastle city center and went shopping (ohhh it's more to a window shopping to me & kam, although I bought 1 item jugak) at TJ Hughes and had late lunch/early dinner at Al-Basha Restaurant after that. This happened on the 8th of June 2009. The next day I volunteered to accompany k.nur babysitting anak of K.zarina: Iffah & Izzah. For someone who lack the skill of babysitting for sure I experienced difficulties in accomodating to the needs of kids. Aku jaga jugak anak buah aku back home but most of the essential things were done by my beloved father. Wow, the experience of jaga budak2 ni makes me feel so kagum dengan keazaman para kaum ibu&ayah yg meneruskan pembelajaran mereka pada masa yg sama perlu menjaga anak2. Aku salute habis2.. I am impressed and I don't think I can do that in the future.. hmmm.. (",) Oh anyway, today (10th June) went back to TJ Hughes wif K.nur to exchange baju yg aku beli. Tu lah last tym inda mau testing, sempit rupanya but thankfully dpt tukar. Tq for menemani aku k.nur. I appreciate it so much. Ohh tidak semana-mana I fall in love with the bags di sana and I remembered my mother and I feel so happy that I have found a handbag for her. So, aku borong la bag2.. yg mana mostlynya rasa2 untuk aku ja hahaha.. Hey the price's not that bad so, why not kan ;oD Ok, no more shopping (yeahh right! Not the right words, especially when the summer sale is coming haha XD)

5/ The fan

Bukan fans a.k.a peminat.. aku xde sefamous mana pun hehehe. By the way, in my previous blog aku ada kata that I bought a deskfan sebab at that time cuaca agak panas. Tapi a few days after I eventually bought the fan through online, the weather changes and it become so cold and gloomy. I've waiting the arrival of the fan since then and it arrived only today (June 10th) and aku dah pakai dah selepas ianya selesai di assemble. Sejuk2 pun aku masih pakai kipas jua.. XD

Picture 4: The deskfan.. tadaaaa.. feels like being back home, with kipas n aircon being my bestfriends at night =)

6/ Lain-Lain Hal

Semenjak balik Uk ni aku sudah semakin rajin memasak haha.. tengah belajar la ni, mana tau diam2 ada rombongan meminang kah apa.. LOL.. Anyways, saya budak baru belajar, kalau masakan x sedap mana mintak tolong maafkan. Semalam aku masak mee goreng inda pakai perencah. Alhamdulillah menjadi juga.

Picture 5: Mee yg aku masak untuk hidang buat Lutfi & Rosmin yg dtg berkunjung also for my beloved lovely housemates.

Btw, I was actually thinking of inserting pictures of all the food yg aku masak sepanjang di sini tapi bila perut sudah lapar, makanan udah terhidang, x sempat pun tangkap gambar udah ngappp habis.. hehehe. Ohhh anyway, hampir2 terlupa, a few days back aku pergi grocery shopping. Mula2 ngan K.nur kat Tesco extra in Durham masa Kam pergi Cardiff and bought few things for our house and we went for a 2nd grocery shopping at ASDA in Spennymore where I also bought benda2 personal hahaha.. Ya ALLAH, shopping sakan bulan ani! Okay lepas ni tinggal, duduk diam2 di rumah supaya inda shopping.. yeaaaa right!!

-- Nursyeff@rni HS --

p/s: A simple note for you from me..

Bila hati ku sudah terbuka untuk berbicara denganmu,

In bermakna apa yg kita bicarakan itu adalah hanya antara aku dan kamu.

Sekali hati ku terluka,

Mana mungkin aku akan dapat merawatnya dengan pantas.

Aku pasti kalau kamu berada di tempat ku kini,

Kamu juga akan merasakan derita yg aku tanggung itu tidak ringan.

Walaupun ku rasakan semua ini amat berat untuk aku terima,

Aku tetap percaya bahawa semua ini ada hikmah disebaliknya, insyaALLAH.

p/p/s: Teman2 semua, doakan yg terbaik untuk aku ya.

Shattered..

Salam,

I've often felt crushed before but I've never guessed that I'll ever feel the same way again. My heart's shattered.. Yup, have you ever felt like hati kamu ditoreh-toreh dan terluka? That's how I actually feel right now.

Ya ALLAH, aku sendiri kecewa dgn diri sendiri coz aku selalunya tidak berjaya untuk menenangkan hati dan tidak berjaya cuba untuk sedaya upaya to be strong to face whatever yg terjadi atau bakal terjadi. Aku memang hambaMu yang amat lemah Ya ALLAH.

Fikiranku sungguh bingung dan blur. I am so lost and I hope I will find myself again SOON, insyaALLAH.

Maafkan aku.. Ampunkan aku..

Today, in fact right now Kam (my housemate) dalam perjalanan menuju ke Cardiff together wif Lutfi n Mahadi. Sorry guys for not sending you off at the train station. I was invited but I think I made the right decision not to. Hope you guys enjoy the food =)

Amalina's has gone to school dari pagi tadi (ohhh panjang umor, baru je ketuk pintu, baru sampai). Been alone dari tadi and it's cold today. Tu la siapa suruh mengada-ngada kepanasan sebelum ani? XD I am trying to cheer myself up..

Anyways, for now I'm holding on to the phrase:
"Setiap yang berlaku itu ada hikmah di sebaliknya"

There's only one person who knew about what happened. You know who you are. I trusted you. I really care for you as you cared about me. Let us be the only ones who knew buat masa ani ok..

I am so not feeling that good.. Having a chest pain.. Ya ALLAH, tabahkanlah hati hambaMu ini..

Terlanjur Cinta? Possible? Nothing is Impossible?

Salam,

Yesterday's sleep was one of the best so far I cud say ;oP It's because I can feel the breeze of wind slipping through the blinds.. yeahhh.. haha.. It's no big deal to you maybe, BUT it does to me =P Erkksss.. what a sentence to start a new post with.. XD

Anyway, semalam (2nd June 2009) rumah #60 ada la buat makan2 mini gathering sikit2 untuk berhibur celebrate Kam's freedom from exams! (We are happy for you dear ^_^). So, there we were: Myself, Kam, Amalina, Lutfi, Rosmin & K.Zila eating dinner plus playing the latest version of Lutfi's board (sebenarnya TERpaksa buat baru coz the old ones are no where to be seen.. hehe). Amalina xleh join sebab ada meeting kat rumah lain. Ohh well, after quite a while not playing it, it was like playing for the very first time!! SADLY I didn't win in either rounds.. haha ohh aku inda pakai baju yg ada bintang kali ahaksss... =P Maybe next time will be much lucky! Even luck doesn't take the side of Rosmin yg baru pernah main the board game. It's hilarious remembering what happened during the game.. Like stepping on the RED box like what? More than 3 times? Kesiannn (Aduhh Kejinya bunyi!) and then a cute scene.. "19,20,21,22.." erkksss..? sampai the next time ada yg volunteer cakap "STOP".. Whoopss sorry Kam ;o) Ohh so much fun! The homesickness is slowly subsiding.. Thanks dear friends! Ohh no worries zeah, nurul, mis and everyone back home, i STILL miss you all so much!!

The fun actually brought me away for a while of something that is bothering me. I am worried but all I cud do for now is pray and hope for the best. Ya ALLAH, aku perlukan kekuatan untuk menempuhi dugaan-dugaanMu.

Having a short break -- Off to Stockton --

Around 12++pm, Kam & myself hop into the X1 bus and after 45mins ride, we arrive in stockton, went around the highstreets of stockton.. and shopping (ahhh siapa shopping ah? hehehe) and we waited for Amalina yg menyusul kemudian. Main objective sebenarnya hanyalah semata-mata untuk membeli Chic Burger & HotSpicy Chic from the halal takeaway fastfood store there.. So, since I need to be back home before masuk waktu Asar, we rushed to the bus stop and we actually missed the bus by 5mins and have to wait another 30mins tapi alhamdulillah sampai jua di rumah b4 Asar and we also sempat makan2 during the waiting ;o)

Soon I'll be off to enjoy the hotspicy wings!

Here are some pictures of us:

Me & Kam @ the Hare & Greyhound Bus Stop waiting for X1

Us vaining around at the shopping area of Stockton


And lastly.. A candid of Kam & Amalina, on our way to the Halal FastFood Store.. (Hmm tgh tengok kedai Clinton ke tu? hehehe)

Wahhh... such a great day, ohh walaupun kami pakai baju ala2 berada di negara masing2 tapi anginnya sajukkk... and I hope it will be that way tonight hehehe...

Seandainya dia memang diciptakan untukku,

insyaALLAH aku dan dia akan akhirnya bersama jua...

-Arni-

Re-aDJusTiNg

Assalamualaikum,

Wah terlalu cepat masa berlalu.. Today, last week I was in the aeroplane menuju ke London. So, tomorrow officially will be a week I've been in Durham, UK.

Somehow I am still readjusting myself here. I still don't have any fixed time going to sleep and waking up. With the weather nowadays, it seems that I'm always on a hungry mode. As someone who doesn't normally took early intake/breakfast, I can't handle my hunger when I woke up around 7/8am here. Or is it just me still having my jetlag? I'm unsure.

Then what worried me was the fact that I'm always experiencing nose bleed. Within this one week, maybe 3/4 times? Kata org, selalunya when this happened, the reason is being 'high temperture' inside the body a.k.a "Panas Dalam".. I simply blamed, not actually blame, I take the cause to be due to the weather. Because I have been experiencing this in Brunei as well. Especially few weeks before my departure to the uk. hopefully it's gonna be less frequent after this. Amin.

Ohh, just wanna share something, I bought a desk fan! (but it has not arrive yet.. hehe). I can't stand the surroundings in the room being so "still" during the nights and during my sleeps. Uhhuh, I've just added more things to be popped into the trunk boxes. Btw, if Nurul & Zeah is reading my blogs: I've securely simpan Nurul's printer into one of my boxes and if there's anything of both of you punya barang yg ada around this house, I'll also do my best to put them in as well okay.

Something to share, for our dinner yesterday, me & Kam masak home-made Pasta.. I know it is nothing new but we made it look different.. I craved letters of our names: AMALINA, ARNI & KAMILAH on top of the mozarella cheese. Below is how it looks after baked. Didn't snap the one b4.. pictures with kam. hehe.. (and the letters look smashed hehe)

So, till then, ni aku kan jalan today after zuhur i'm going cruising around city center to see if there's anything to buy from the closing store of BAY.. hehe.

-Arni in bowburn-