My heart is totally and official unable to heal itself, because I don't want to lose him. I don't want to lose what I don't have and what I have left of my memories with him. It's just not possible. I want to let go but I don't want.

Now I am looking at another path in life. That's full of sins and not a straight path, full of consequences that I know that I can't face. I am totally not thinking straight right now. But what can I do. I don't see myself with any guys. And maybe this is a solution. Or a destruction of my faith and religious belief, which is now slowly deteriorating into nothingness. And I know deep in my heart that I don't want to let it go. Because if I do, I don't know if I can come back to reality.

Well if u r tinkin y my title is tat wae is cuz i wanna talk abt 3 tings tat happened to me tis whole week..first part is funny, second is cozy n e third is tiring + $$ gone...

So e first part "Fake Family Car"...
Well e last post, rmb i post abt tis guy name Hasyir in my werk place had a car rite..so he's been "so called" my driver n another fren of my name Jill..he's been drivin us to lunch everytime..so while we were cmng back frm one of our norms "gng to b late lunch @ NUS"...so while we were drivin back, Hasyir said his car is like a Family Car..His e father on e driver side, me e mother on e seat beside n Jill e daught in e back seat...so I said "If we were e mother n father, Jill is then our adopted daughter..since she doesn't look like us, rite?" So frm tat moment on Jill called us Mommy n Daddy n we blew e matter frm simple Famliy Car to Soap Opera show..Frm Jill nt our child to being Kat, our ex-werkin fren, e real mother..Then Hasyir n Kat had an affair, bt Hasyir thot Jill wasn't his, which we lata found out tat he was e father..To me also havin an affair at my another werkin place wif a guy name Khaaliq tat had commitment issues, so I left him n den I found out abt Hasyir n Kat, so I divorce Hasyir n den Jill was left at our doorstep aft Kat left wif another guy on a bike..so nw e story still is gng on which left me here at my another werk place, so e story only has Hasyir n Jill in it..my character wanted time off aft Hasyir asked me to forgive him n get back tgt..so complicated..bt realli it sounds like one of e Soap drama on tv like "Days of Our Life" tat nvr ends..so our story hav not ended yet i tink..dun noe if I cn come back in time b4 Hasyir leaves..

Aniwae if u r confused on abt why I hav 2 werk place is cuz I werk at another area 4 tis 2 wks period..my real work place is called "Hi-soft" and e one I am nw in is called "Jabil"..so yea..I've been transfer here 2 gain sum exp...:D So tat e first part to my story..abt my Fake Family..

Nw to e real Family..Had an dinner outing ystd..nowadays since my sis 2nd engagement is cancelled, she's been asking to spend more time wif her as a family..havin dinner n all..so its quite okie 4 me to hav tis family outing..aniwae ystd outing was at Causeway Point Banquet, yes I noe nt tat glamourous bt still it counts..i'll alwaes treasure wat time I hav left wif dem, n no matter wat, my family will alwaes b e top priority to me..i promise..:)

Nxt to e third topic I wanted to talk abt..Shopping wif bestie..
So if u noe me long enuf I dun Hate, bt I dislike shopping cuz I feel its a waste of money..bt recently aft dun noe wat miracle, I tend to like, bt i hav to keep watch on wat I spend..So since I wanted to shop, I went out wif my BESTIE...AYU!!! it was kinda spontaneous, as in e morning we were talkin tat we both were free tat afternoon aft i cancelled all my plans..so i called my mom n say I will b late hm, n tat afternoon we went to e one n onli shooping street tat I am familiaries wif..BUGIS STREET!!!

So we walk n went into one shop n walk again n into another shop..tat was e routine..in, out, buy, in, out n nt buy, in n den out..so finally e dae ended wif MacDonalds aka my first eatin Mac in 3 months n my 1st fast food in tis month..so cool ryte..aft I thot abt it I was eating my mom's cooking almost all tis 3 months I've been werkin at tis new place..no fast food, no false food, all real food..bt still I wonder why I am still e same(chubby :D).. so update of wat I bought..