She didn't need words yesterday nor did she need any poison to soothe her. I wish I could tell you, she just needed you to hold her and tell her it'll all be fine, lie even if you have to. But where were you...fuck you! I hate you for this..Where are you? Where?
Hate is a strong word but I really hate you. Over the years, its been easier to just hate you. Most of the time it's the only thing I can do...
I wonder sometimes if the only thing I am to you is a joke. Another opportunity to break the girl who always seems so sad. What do you want from me? I want to tell you how fragile I really am, how fragile you make me and how this 'ego' I have is the only strengh I have in me. How can I when all I am is a joke?
I'm tired of listening to how tough you have it, how difficult life has been, how my problems are nothing to yours..It's always about you..I'm just tired..do you seriously think everthing has been all roses and sunshine for me? Really? Skrew you! So don't ask me if I'm fine...I'm not. Let's just leave things at that.
I wanna tell you that I'm scared. Boy, I might be a coward to all things supernatural but really, what I fear is reality. I watched Revolutionary Road and I'm downright scared because I'm fearful that it just might become reality...Damn, I wish you were here again..sighs.
