Been a while since I put anything on here. Not really sure what I even want to write. Life has been weird as ever, but nowadays it just feels less profound to some extent. I miss the days where I felt some kind of passion, for whatever reasons they were. I guess as we grow older we tend to gravitate away from ourselves, forgetting and making new memories, schemas for what anything means.
Personally, some days I feel like I've changed so much I don't even know who I am, what I stand for, what has led me to this point in life. And what's stranger, and even a little sad, is that I just don't feel like it means anything to be anything anymore. When we were young, knowing so little it's as if we thought we could stand on the shoulders of giants, when really, we had no idea what that could even mean. Maybe I just had higher hopes for what life would be.
I mean as hard as it is to admit it, we're all pretty much stuck in our own little cycles, changing ever so slightly with every revolution. Til one day comes, where you're just not who you were at all, though you retain some elements of it. The bits that stayed and clung on and never left you are all that remain, and all those bits do is mutate you further away from yourself. I mean disconnect can only be so real, right? Who knows. What is anything when it's just the most plausible explanation? What is rationality in this postmodern shithole? What is good, what is evil, and who truly are the winners? Who knows. What does it matter? I just miss the days when I had passion.
