It turns out we are Irish after all

Yep, seven generations ago, we had an ancestor named Thomas McKee, who was born in Ireland, and died in Pennsylvania. From what I gather either his uncle or brother founded McKeesport, PA. I guess we will have to visit it sometime. And I guess, next St. Patrick's Day some leprechauns will have to visit our house.
You might wonder what lead me to this discovery. A few weeks ago while searching for Nikolay's school pictures, because he was going to do a presentation in Ariel's class about immigrating, I came accross some some family history files that I had been working on in 2004 and 2005, (which were put on the back burner in order to take care of Baby Annika and keep Ariel from dying of cancer). In those files were some temple cards with some ordinances that still needed to be done for 2 men, Nikolay's great grandfathr and great uncle. A few days after finding these, I got a phone call from a friend in the ward wondering if Nikolay would like to go to the Manhattan Temple with her husband. So they went last Saturday and did the ordinances for Nikolay's ancestors, and I decided to call his mom in Salt Lake to let her know about it. She told me some more information about her ancestors, so I wanted to update our information on the New Family Search website. After I logged in, I took a look at my ancestors and saw the name Lettie McKee, and kept going back till I found that her ancestors came from Ireland.

All of this brings me back to my theme of late: I am a lady of leisure, trying to find/remember my purpose in life, whildst distracting myself and meeting the seemingly minimum at times needs of those whom I am responsible for: my kids and husband. Should I feel guilty for not finding more fulfillment in my role as homemaker? Do my fleeting desires and attempts at distraction deter me from filling my role, or keep me sane enough to do it because, frankly how much can one or should one live for the prospects of changing another poopy diaper or cleaning up after another successful (by minimum standards of a starch, a protein and a vegetable, everyone being present and eating enough, and starting with a prayer) dinner?
If reading a great book or watching a moving film, are less worthy distractions that becoming engrossed in family history for a few days or getting "into" the Old Testament, or finally getting the taxes done or finishing the baby quilt for my favorite expectant sister-in-law, at least I can put a bookmark in or push pause long enough to meet the immediate needs of my family members.
Must I have loftier goals, like Rebekah's of going back to school to eventually be able teach High School, and teach young people to think analytically and make a difference with their lives? Or may I flit from one short-lived passion to another like planting the seeds for my vegetable garden or re-organizing a closet, stopping to nurse my newborn "on demand?"
On the one hand, I cherish the freedom to do as I please with confidence that the answer to the above question is that it is up to me, but the downside is that, cabin fever often sets in and I may not have much interesting to talk (or blog) about, but everyone is healthy and safe, even if we are still working on the feeling happy and loved part, and hopefully growing intellectually and spiritually and developing physical skills.
Here are the updates on everyone:
Ariel and Adriana have pink eye and are home from school for the second day on a row, and so ready to go back. It makes the summer seem daunting.
Annika's new favorite number is eleven.
Adriana's riddle she asks everyone is "How do you make 7 even?" "Take away the 's'." I figured it out.
Dallin is almost all the way potty trained. Now, he wants to be a papa when he grows up.
No new pictures of Alice as she getting over her baby acne, next week for sure.

In my quest to be older and wiser I have made an observation: some lessons can not be learned by example only. For example, always sharing with your child doesn't teach them to share, and may have the adverse affect of giving them a sense of entitlement. Case in point: Annika and Dallin needed help making bracelets, and Ariel agreed to help them in exchange for earning her cartwheel privileges back (she had earlier violated our cartwheels, only if you are the only person in the room policy). A few minutes later I hear shouting about beads. Come to find out, instead of helping them make their bracelets (BTW should I ban pink beads from Dallin?) she is claiming that certain beads are only hers and demanding that they give them back. I talked to her about how sharing is nice and she is supposed to be nice, so she should share her beads. She still didn't want to share so I sent her to her room until she could learn how to be nice. I now that is very vague, but it was the best I could come up with. The she came out of her room and asked if she could stay out, I told her she could if she wrote down ten ways to be nice to her siblings. She came up with some, which I praised her for and now she is doing cartwheels and not mentioning beads. And I am left wondering if I did the right thing, and if I should bring up the fact that she isn't supposed to do cartwheels until she helps them make bracelets, even though everyone has moved on to other things and there is a mess of beads in Annika's room.

Have I scared you away from reading my blog yet?

St Patrick's Day--a lesson in frugality and rejection of the "who can indulge their kids the most" culture

Adriana learned how to Irish step dance at school from a friend at recess on St. Patrick's Day and then she taught Ariel. Free dance classes are cool, and it looks like they have this dance down better than the weekly dance classes they have been going to since they were 3. Ariel has a friend who is teaching her gymnastics at recess too.

This is the 4th year in a row now, where after Adriana came home from school, so excited about St. Patrick's Day and searching for Leprechauns, I have thought to myself, "We should do something next year to celebrate." But I have consistently forgotten to do anything about this holiday. I take that back, two years ago she was supposed to bring the treat on St. Patrick's Day, and I bought rainbow airheads and put them on a cupcake, like it was a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but I did nothing at home. Maybe it was becasue growing up we didn't celebrate St. Patricks Day at home, that I can remember. Maybe it is becasue we are not Irish. I have a feeling that in an effort to indulge our kids even more grown-ups are gradually making more and more efforts to celebrate holidays for kids. Has anyone else noticed this trend?
As we are trying to plan out our summer and our expenses, we have come to the conclusion that it makes more sense for me and the kids to join the fitness club that Nikolay has a membership to through work, than to join the swim team again, because we can swim there and they have free child care for the non-swimmers. I started to take that thought a little further with all of the activities the kids want to do this summer: gymnastics--monkey bars, dance--learn it from your friends at school like Irish step dancing, basketball--we'll put up a hoop, and I'll run a basketball camp (their friends can pay me $45), soccer--backyard. We'll never have to pay for the kids to do anything again and we can start saving for retirement, and we won't have to drive them all over the place and be worried about being late and having the right clothes on. I haven't come up with a good alternative to the amusement park close to our house. As it is, Ariel is just dreaming about the day she will be old enough to work there. Oh, yeah, Nikolay's work has a day day in the summer where all of the employees go with their families for free. Problem solved.
OK, honestly I am being kind of sarcastic, but we are going to cut back on the number of expensive and time consuming activities the kids will be in.


On another note, remember how I was having a tough time getting a good picture to put on Alice's birth announcement?

Here is the one I decided on. I was waiting until everyone I sent them to actually got them before posting it, as not to ruin the surprise.


After the Irish step dancing I got the kids to sit down together and I snapped this picture of them all together.Here is lovely Annika. I never imagined I would have a child with such beautiful brown eyes. About this time last year I couldn't even bribe her to look at the camera, but now she is constantly asking me to take her picture.

A Good Baby

After my first daughter was born, I was shocked at how people, even complete strangers kept asking me if she was a good baby. What kind of question is that? Do they think that I could possibly not love her to pieces? Does it look like I don't like her? Then as more and more people asked the same question, I started to wonder if it was a normal question and that some people must answer, no, otherwise, why ask? But I was still perplexed by the whole idea of categorizing babies as either good babies or bad babies. At that point in my life I saw our first offspring as an extension of us, completing our family, a product of our love etc.... It was if someone was asking me if my right arm were good, even though it was clear to see that I have a splendid right arm. It wasn't till much later that I came to understand the question more as, "Is your baby well behaved? Does she sleep well? Eat well? etc..." And as I am getting older and wiser I can see that although sometimes our offspring are not well behaved, we still love them (maybe not to pieces in a bad moment) but more completely and fully, and as we get through difficult spots together, we start to understand what eternal love is.


I am happy and grateful to say that Alice is a good baby. She eats well, she sleeps well, and she even smiles and says "ga". She also has this fabulous hair that stands straight up. I didn't recognize it's uniqueness at first. The Miners got a kick out of it, that was when she was 2 weeks old and still hadn't gone out in public besides the doctor's office yet. The next week, I took her to church for the first time and people gave me all kinds of suggestions for how to get her hair to lay flat. It still didn't sink in until my dad who visited the next week made a comment to the effect of, "Can't you do anything to make it not stick up?" So the next Sunday, I tried putting mousse in it thinking that at least I could get the curls that naturally appear when her hair is wet to stay, to no avail. I tried moussing it down, and combing it over. Nothing "works," so I am just going to take the adive of one brother in our ward whose daughter had the same kind of hair as a baby and enjoy it for what it is--fabulous, and take lots of pictures.

Grandpa came for Alice's baby blessing

He came in the middle of the night, but was up at the crack of dawn playing with the kids, and they just soaked up every moment of attention that he gave them, all day long on Saturday. Dallin had to be somehow touching Grandpa, either climbing on him, hugging him, sitting on his lap, or holding his hand as we walked.
The kids got out almost every game we owned and Grandpa willingly indulged them in playing each one. Notice Ariel doing a hand stand in the background, that was one of about a thousand that she did while Grandpa was here, and she wonders why her shoulders ache.
He can even play games while holding Alice.

Dallin and Grandpa built a really cool house together.
Everyone one got in on the Lego fun.
Sunday before going to church for the blessing, we snapped a few photos of us holding Alice


Do you see how she is looking up at him?
One proud papa.

Monday Grandpa went to the local fish hatchery with Annika, Dallin and I. We had a really great time together while he was here. It got me thinking about what a blessing his love for us is. He is doing more for my kids than his father did for me and my siblings by spending time with them and participating in important priesthood blessings like Ariel's baptism and confirmation and Alice's baby blessing. And Nikolay is able to bless our family in ways his father wasn't able to bless his own, thanks to his love, faithfulness, willingness to make sacrifices, and honoring the priesthood which he holds. I feel blessed by these men who have decided to live better family lives than their fathers did and to give love as fathers more than they received from their own, and live worthily to bless their families through ordinances of the priesthood.

Adriana lost her first two teeth (finally)

On Wednesday, Nikolay pulled out Adriana's two front bottom teeth. These are her first two teeth that she has lost. On the second day of school, back in September, her first tooth started wiggling. At the time I told her, erroneously, that it takes abut six weeks for a tooth to come out after it gets wiggly. She really wanted to loose a tooth at school because her teacher gives the kids a special thing to put their tooth in, so for the past few weeks as we tried to wiggle her tooth at home she would not let us go so far as to actually pull it out, because it was her plan to pull it out at school the next day. Her grown-up teeth, behind both of her two front teeth actually started growing in, so maybe that is what took so long, because they weren't pushing the other ones out, just giving her a second row of shark teeth.
The next day another milestone occurred in our family--Alice lost her belly button scab (is there a better word for that?). The very next day she smiled at me for the first time, and even laughed a little. She is making more and more eye-contact now.
Ariel's latest news is that she gets to be Daisy Head Maisy in her class' readers' theater production. She is also busy learning her division facts and trying to walk on her hands, usually at the same time.
In Dallin's world: He asked me if I could buy him a purse, and I told him that only girls used purses, then he said, "OK, but me a Spiderman purse." I told him I would, if I saw one. A few days later the same thing happened with a Chinese fan. So if anyone sees a Spiderman purse or fan out there, let me know. I can't decide about Fur Berries. It started with Adriana wanting one for her birthday and then Ariel and Annika wanted them for Christmas, so Dallin feels left out. I told him they were only for girls, what do you think?
Yesterday when I asked him what he wants to be when he grows up, maybe an engineer like Papa, he said he wants to be a bird. A big red bird, with wings.
Annika wants to be a mom when she grows up. That was my goal too, so I thought it didn't really matter what I majored in, as long as I was interested in it. What a luxury, to go to college just for the fun of it, to be educated just for the noble virtues of being educated. I hope to steer her into a more practical department than Linguistics, so that if the situation arises where she would be working, she can earn enough to actually make it worth her time. When I was choosing a major I was naive enough to think that worrying about money was a shallow character flaw, and missed the whole practicality of it.

There are two quotes that I came across this week that I will be adding to my side bar. The first one I read in the Ensign. It was in an article by Kathleen H. Hughes entitled "Grow up unto the Lord," she asked, "Is the divine within us being nurtured, or do our actions prevent the Spirit from becoming the predominant force in our lives?" This really made me think about how I choose to react under stress, which I encounter a lot these days trying to meet the demands of my five kids.

The other quote comes from one of my all time favorite books, "The Little Prince"

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

I need to remember this when I start to be judgemental and start forgetting why I really love people.