Ames Two Months

I know I say this every month, but I can't believe that it has already been two months since this cute little boy joined our family.  

• He's such a chunky little thing.  He's got the chubbiest little cheeks and double chin.  He can hardly even hold his head up from all the face chub!
• I hate even writing this because I don't want to jinx myself, but he is a pretty great sleeper at night.  He will usually go down at about 8 and then sleep until 2-4 and then up every 2-3 hours after that.  
• Aside from being a great night sleeper, he's a pretty terrible napper.  He can be in the deepest of sleeps, but the second I set him down, his eyes are open wider than they can possibly go.  We are sure trying hard to get him to be a better napper.  Some days I feel that my entire day is just spent trying to get him to take a good nap!
• He's been cooing lately and it's pretty much the cutest thing I've ever seen.  Owen loves when he does it and says, "He said gooooo!"
• He's a pretty happy and content baby most of the time. He loves to smile and sometimes when we make eye contact and he gives me this little eyebrow raise, I can pretty much feel my heart growing 100x.
• We are all pretty obsessed with him - especially Owen.  A few weeks ago at the park, he went around to all of his "friends" and said, "hey! I've got a brother!" He's pretty proud. He loves talking to him in a baby voice and constantly tells him "he's so cute!" or "you've got chubby cheeks!" These are most likely things that he has heard me say one thousand times a day, but they are pretty cute to hear him repeat them.
• He has a love/hate relationship with the binki.  He either loves it or gives me this look of "how could you?" when I try to give it to him.
• At his last doctor's appointment, the doctor said he has an umbilical cord hernia (seen in some of the pics).  I am hoping it goes away on its own so he doesn't have to have surgery!

Bright eyed - typically how he looks as he is set down for a nap

Love his little tongue

I am glad Owen insists on joining in so that we can have pictures like this.

Ames One Month

I can't believe my little buddy is already one month old! 

Here are a few things about Ames at one month:

• He is seriously the best baby.  He's a great eater, an okay sleeper, but he is just so content all of the time.  He really only cries when he is hungry or tired.  
• Owen is still obsessed with him and loves touching his face, ears, eyes… everything.  Whenever I have Ames on the floor or the bed, Owen has to be laying right next to him. Like literally RIGHT next to him and touching every inch of his body.  Needless to say, he doesn't get set down a whole lot when Owen is awake!
• He is probably the loudest baby of all time.  He is seriously a little grunty mcgrunterson.  I finally had to move him out of our room because he would start grunting about an hour before he would wake up…so I would basically just be awake waiting for him to wake up.  He also makes this sound when he grunts that sounds like a baby goat.  It's hilarious.  
• He finally started smiling a few days ago and I about melted into a puddle on the floor. I think the first smiles are one of the best parts of motherhood.
• He LOVES being swaddled and held close.  My sister in law Megan gave me a soly baby wrap and the second he gets put into that, he falls right to sleep and sleeps for HOURS.
• Along with being loud when he wakes up, he is also so GASSY! He gives little (or not so little) toots for about the first 10 minutes of him waking up.  Just like his dad!
• He has definitely started losing his hair on the top of his head (just like Owen).  I thought he would get lucky and keep it, but nope, it started falling out at about 3 weeks.  
• He is his brother's clone! I sometimes think he has a look of his own, but then other times I feel like I didn't even get a new baby… just went back in time.
• He is starting to fill out a lot.  I could kiss those chubby little cheeks until the end of time and still feel like I didn't kiss them enough.

Sweetest little face

Sitting up like a big boy

Oops

Probably the greatest photo of all time. I just can't.

I spy a photobomber.

Ok fine, you can crash our photo shoot!

Smolder 

I love me a sleeping baby.

Ames Birth Story

This isn't really a post that I have looked forward to writing, but I wrote down Owen's birth story after he was born and have enjoyed going back and remembering certain details.  I am not sure I will feel the same about this birth down the road, but hey, it's good to write it down.  While the final outcome was of course a special one, I can't sugarcoat the fact that getting Ames here was honestly one of the worst moments of my life! I know... it sounds dramatic. I am 100% not looking for any type of sympathy - I know people go through this type of thing all of the time! But it was a little more drama than I was looking for. This will be long and detailed so feel free to skip over a few paragraphs to the ending :)

I had a really hard time finding a doctor that I liked out here.  The doctors in Utah are very different than outside of Utah.  I was finally able to find one that I liked, but it wasn't until I was about 29 weeks along.  At one of my first appointments, they learned I had a 4th degree tear with Owen, so there is an automatic offering of a C-section or induction if you want.  It wasn't even something on my radar at the time because I guess I didn't realize the severity of a 4th degree tear.  I went back and forth for weeks and tried to do as much research as I could.  I ultimately decided on an induction (something I was SO anti before this) and May 1st was set!

The Friday before my induction, I woke up in the middle of the night with some contractions and cramping.  I was freaking out because I went from absolutely nothing (not dilated or effaced) with Owen to having him within 48 hours.  So I figured if something was already happening, this baby was ready to come!  My mother in law wasn't set to come out to help for a few days, so I was very anxious. I started lining up babysitters just in case.  Nothing happened on Friday, but I woke up with the same thing on Saturday morning. I was trying to take it as easy as possible as I DID NOT want to go into labor then.  Luckily nothing happened until early Wednesday morning.  I woke up with contractions that quickly made themselves to the 3-5 minute mark (mostly 3 minute) and stayed there for quite awhile.  After a few hours of not sleeping, I decided to get up and curl my hair (what any sane person in labor does) because I thought we would be heading into the hospital!  The contractions were very consistent, but they weren't strong enough for me to feel like it was time to go in yet.  Finally at about 8 am, we packed our bags and started making our way to the door.  I decided to eat breakfast first and when I did, my contractions completely stopped.  I was so confused because they had been that way for over 6 hours with me laying down, standing up, sitting down, etc! I was still thinking something would happen that day, but nothing did.

The next morning, I was set to go in at 7 am for the induction.  They have you call an hour before to make sure they have room for you. I did, and unfortunately, they were full.  I had been up for a few hours with anxious nerves, so I was luckily able to go back to bed for a few hours.  I called again 4 hours later and they still didn't have room.  They gave me the ol' "don't call us, we'll call you" line.  I was so bummed and was convinced we were just never meant to have this baby!  Finally around 3 pm, they called and asked if I wanted to come in. Uh, yeah! I've been waiting around all day! We got to the hospital around 4 pm, but they were doing a doctor shift change around 5:30, so they didn't want to start me on anything until the new doctor was there since she would likely be the one to deliver.  In my head, I was thinking we were for sure going to be having the baby in the middle of the night (just off how long inductions have taken for other people).

Checked in and ready to go! 39 weeks 

They checked me and I was only at a 1 and 50% effaced (same as my doctor appt on Friday). I was shocked since it seemed like my body had been doing something. They didn't get me started on anything until 7 pm and it wasn't pitocin (which is the only thing I have heard of with inductions).  It was a drug to ripen the cervix before starting pitocin.  The medicine takes about 12 hours for anything to happen, so we set up camp and I had it in my mind that we would be having the baby in the morning. I hardly slept that night between nerves, nurses checking in on me, bright monitors, the most uncomfortable bed ever, etc.  Finally in the morning, they checked me and I was exactly the same as where I was before, so they were going to try a different drug that also helped thin the cervix.  This drug brought on some more powerful contractions, so I decided to get some pain meds.  They gave me some drug that was extremely strong... wow, what a trip.  Within a minute of them putting it into my IV, my head was literally spinning and I was talking all sort of crazy.  I was seeing dancing turtles and I remember imagining my entire childhood neighborhood lined out on a map as a musical scale (I don't know how to describe this, but it was vivid and made complete sense to me).  I even asked Jordan to text my whole family saying "tell them I said that this drug is the 'shi*".  He thought I was nuts, but I was persistent that he text them this.  Luckily, he didn't.  The drugs immediately knocked me out and I was able to get some much needed rest for a few hours.

Off to la la land. I don't know what is possessing me to actually put this picture on the blog (probably my extreme lack of sleep), but I sent this picture to my sister after I got the drugs. Needless to say, I was happy. 3 seconds after this photo was taken, I passed out.

After the 4 hour dose, they checked me again and still no progress.  I was so frustrated because I had been having these crazy painful contractions!  They did another round of the drugs and the pain meds and I was again sent off to La-La land.  Again after the 4 hours, they checked me and I was maybe at a 2 and 60% effaced.  At this point, I was really starting to lose my patience.  Why was this taking so long? And why wouldn't they just start me on the good stuff to get the baby here? I was so tired (hadn't really slept in 3 days), hungry (they had me on a liquid diet) and it just seemed like whatever they were trying was NOT working.  Since it was clear we were not having a baby that day, Jordan went to pick up my mother in law and Owen to come and try to brighten my spirits.  They started me on another dose of the induction drug.  At this point I was having REALLY painful contractions,  but I decided to hold off on the pain meds since it made me crazy and I couldn't even keep my eyes open and didn't want Owen to see me like that.  As I sat in the hospital room, I just started losing it. I could not stop crying and was in so much pain.  Finally, Jordan came back and I was able to see Owen.  He was the cutest thing ever and kept asking me in the sweetest, quietest voice, "You okay mom?"  He was very concerned about the machines and such that I was hooked up to.  I was still having extremely powerful and painful contractions about every 3 minutes, so I would have Jordan or my mother in law distract him so I could breathe it out.  I even said to my mother in law, if my contractions are this strong at a 2, I can't imagine what they feel like right before giving birth with no epidural! (With Owen, I got an epidural right away because the anesthesiologist wanted to go to sleep, so I never experienced a true powerful contraction).

At about 7 pm, Jordan left to take Owen and Amy home and I could not get those drugs fast enough! The nurse checked me at luckily I was at a 4! Wahoo! The plan was still do continue with this other drug for another 12 hour dose and get started with pitocin in the morning, but she was going to check with the doctor since I had made some progress.  She gave me the pain medication and I was immediately asleep - these drugs knocked me right out!  I don't know how long it was, but very suddenly, I was awake with the worst pain I had ever had in my entire life. I hadn't felt any of the contractions this soon after the previous doses and with my extremely foggy mind, I thought that maybe I was just imagining it.  I waited for another contraction and it was just as bad. I was writhing in pain in the dark, alone and had to grip the bed to prevent myself from screaming.  I called Jordan at about 7:40 to check where he was and he was just leaving our house (about 20 minutes away). I told him to hurry because I was in an extreme amount of pain.  I pushed the nurse call button and asked that she come in.  The doctor came in instead and I was trying to describe how much pain I was in, but the drugs had seriously knocked me out and I could hardly even formulate a coherent sentence.  He asked if I wanted the epidural and I said yes.  It took a few minutes for them to get that started and I was seriously having a hard time breathing through the contractions.  I told them I didn't know how I was going to sit still through the epidural.  During the setup, I was able to breathe myself through them, but when it came down to the real deal, I was at the point of gritting my teeth together and screaming that I couldn't do it.  I was somehow able to hold still during the marking of the epidural, but right before they inserted the needle, I was able to gasp, "I think I need to push!"  Since I was drugged and probably pretty slurred, the nurse asked if she heard me correctly. But I couldn't even help it and my body started to push.  She immediately called the nurses to get prepped for delivery.  They somehow were able to finish the epidural and told me it would be 20-30 minutes for me to feel any effect.  I laid back on the table in a ton of pain (I could feel EVERYTHING), motionless and not really able to open my eyes.  I finally peeked them open to see chaos with about 10 different people in the room rushing to prep the room.  The nurses told me not to push, but I couldn't help it at all.  I literally had no control over my body or my mind and looking back, I am sure I was in a minor state of shock. With the next contraction I couldn't help but push really hard and splat! it was like my water exploded everywhere (in fact I think it did because the nurses were kind of freaking out).  Finally Jordan made it back and I am sure it was quite the scene to walk into! The nurses were rushing around and his wife was screaming bloody murder.  Seriously, I look back to the screams that I was making and I am mortified! In fact, the sound of my own screaming kept me up that first night... haha. But I wish there was a way I could describe how not in control I was - I had no control over my body, my mind, what I said, how loud I was screaming, etc.  It was kind of like this weird out of body experience.  With the next contraction, my body started pushing again and I was trying to gain control of my mind to be able to do it, but it was useless.  But somehow what I did was good enough to get the head out and my contraction was still going.  Everyone was telling me to keep pushing, but I wasn't able to get my strength back and had kind of stopped breathing and the next push did nothing. The nurse who was coaching me was finally able to get my focus. My eyes peeked open just a tad and made eye contact with her, took a deep breath and at 8:09 pm with one last push, baby was here!

6 lbs. 10 oz. 

19.5 inches long

Great set of lungs.

I was still kind of freaking out with my mind so foggy, so I just laid back on the bed with my eyes closed sobbing. I couldn't believe what just happened! This was not the birth that I had imagined at all. I felt so overwhelmed and not myself - in fact, I felt like a complete nut job! Finally after a few moments, they brought the baby back over to me to do some skin to skin contact.  I could honestly hardly keep my eyes open and was so weak.  I also had cords and IV lines running all over the place, so needless to say, it didn't go well.  I couldn't nurse and I could hardly move! All I wanted to do is close my eyes and go to sleep.

Attempting the skin to skin

 Jordan took the baby back while I tried to get back into a normal mental state. I was determined to get these drugs to wear off so I could enjoy my baby! Little Ames was having a rough time calming down and he cried for over an hours after he was born.  I felt so helpless!    I guess with it all, I can say that I now know what it feels like to go through labor without an epidural. And from that, I learned that I never want to do it again! The pain was of course awful, but the worst part of it all was just not having control over my mind.  Finally, I was able to transfer over to the mom and baby ward and get rid of all those darn cords. I was feeling much more like myself and was able to hold my baby for real this time and it's been much more of a dream ever since :)

This is what I actually refer to as my first time holding him since the first was unsuccessful.

Owen has done great with the adjustment to big brother.  He is obsessed with him and calls him "my baby". He will constantly ask, "what's wrong with my baby?" if he's ever crying.  He loves to be around him and touch his face constantly! But I would definitely take the over loving brother over the opposite outcome.  Now, if we could just get this baby to sleep without being held...

I mean... come on.  Couldn't you just look at that face forever?

First time meeting big brother

Obsessed

Teeny tiny toes

Christmas in Folsom

This year, we ventured out to Jordan's mom's house in Folsom, CA for Christmas.  It was such a nice break! My sister and her family live about 35 minutes away, so it's always nice to get to see them too.

Owen all packed and ready to go!

The drive started out nice.  Owen actually took a nap in the car (which is rare) and we took a few goods stops to get us through.  Plus, we left late enough, that he ended up falling asleep for the night (sorta) in the car so that gave us a few great hours.  We knew that we would hit snow when we had to over Donner Pass.  We went back and forth on whether or not we should just keep driving (since it was supposed to snow allllll night) or to stop in Reno for the night so we could drive in the snow during the day.  We decided that it would be better to just stop for the night to rest since we didn't know how bad the snow would be and driving in the day is always better.

Owen promptly woke up as soon as we stopped and was WIDE AWAKE and ready to party!  He then gifted us by waking up at 6 am the next morning ready to party again.  At least we were able to get an early start...  We were quite surprised as we went outside and found that it had snowed a ton in Reno.  There was not a flake of snow in sight the night before, so we knew we were in for it...  Jordan will say that I am the worst backseat driver alive (which may or may not be true), I call it being cautious.  The roads were awful and I kept wanting him to slow down or pull over to put the chains on. Just as the roads were starting to get really bad, we were heading down a hill and turned a corner and all of the sudden, traffic was stopped.  We unfortunately could not stop in time and got in a minor accident.  Of course, this was where the highway patrol decided it was a good place for everyone to install chains.  Probably not the best set up since we saw 2-3 other accidents right there (you can see another accident in the pic below)

It really was pretty minor and you can't even really tell in this picture.  We weren't going fast at all, but we did manage to break our mirror off and damage every single plate on the side of our car.  We were lucky that it was so minor, but still no fun.

After the chain stop, the roads continued to get worse and worse.  It was a complete white out! We couldn't see a thing and if we didn't have a car to follow, we would have been completely lost.  Luckily these cars stayed on the roads because it was so bad at some points, if they had gone off a cliff, we probably would have followed right behind them.  It was awful because there was no where you could stop and pull off the road to wait it out since it was coming down so hard, but we also couldn't see.  I was white knuckling it the entire time.  They were closing the freeway in numerous spots and I'm pretty sure that we were just barely ahead all of the closures.  

I call this photo the beautiful disaster.  This was actually when the roads were pretty clear.  The normal 2 hour drive took us over 5.  Not to sound dramatic or anything, but I seriously feel lucky that we made it alive! It was so scary and I vow here to never ever ever do that drive again in the winter! (I also said that the last time we drove it in the winter)

We finally made it and the partying began!  Jack and Owen playing on the kindle

That night, we went out with Jordan's family and my sister and brother in law to celebrate Jordan's birthday

My niece Hallie came over with her siblings to babysit. Owen avoided all naps that day and woke up at 6, so he was pretty tired.  I don't even remember that last time he fell asleep on someone's lap.  Maybe when he was like 4 months old?

Burying himself in the presents.

Christmas Sunday. Which also sums out our life at church these days.

On Christmas Eve, we had a great dinner with all of Jordan's family.  Owen was in heaven getting to sit at the kid table with his cousins.  That was all fun and games until he started throwing food at his cousins and yanking off the table runner (taking their plates of food with it)

Drowning away his sorrows at the adult table

Next up, we visited Jordan's Grandma Lewis and met up with his cousins who I had never met before.  

Owen apparently had Christmas jitters because he woke up early again to celebrate!  I'm afraid the years of me sleeping in on Christmas are gone for the next 20+ years.

We started out with toys from Santa.  Of course, he was gifted a ball.  He always plays with this spikey one at Target, so we figured it was a safe bet.

I must hold all of my toys at once.

This is his throwing face.  I'm not sure if it's so serious because he is just trying to concentrate really hard on his skillz or if he is giving you a good warning you he is about to throw it at you (I get this same face when he throws food at my face as well).

Great throw to dad

This ghetto car was also a hit.  It plays "Pump, pump the jam, pump it up"... you know the one.  So luckily I get to hear that over and over again.

 The Patricks arrived and the gift opening began.  Owen had plenty of helpers to open his presents.

That afternoon, we headed over to my sister's house to spend the day and dinner with them.  Somehow, I only got videos of them, and no actual pictures.  Just know that a lot of Just Dance was played.  I also loved this seat arrangement that Nick "fashioned" together.  Yes, that is Nick's belt strapping him to the chair.

My little Mozart

We were there for 9 days although it somehow still felt like we didn't have time to do all that we wanted to do. Here are a bunch of other random photos from the trip:

Couldn't get enough of dad.  He loved having him around 24/7.  Again, like I didn't even exist.  I thought boys were supposed to love their moms!

Probably my favorite pic of the whole trip.  This is when we were driving to the Morton's house.  Owen was watching the Lion King on the DVD player and was apparently not that happy about it.

Sneaking a sip of dad's soda.

Fishy faces on grandma's door.