Fresh (but dampy) start for 1446H.

 The Hijri 1446H year has begun. And I "celebrated" it with my 2 friends at the East Coast of Malaysia.

Kuantan has many things to offer. Unlike during my times in 2010-early 2015, Kuantan has been a mushroom shroud for local cafes, street arts and variety of foods to attract local tourists as well as foreign ones. My beloved then-campus look kinda more alive now than before. And its surrounding is not as eerie as before too.

The roads were almost the same as before. It is quite surprising that I still remember most of  main roads in Kuantan, and even the Bay Route Road (its known as Bukit Beirut in Malay tho) on my way to Indera Mahkota. The highlight of our journey was to ride a speed boat on Sungai Kuantan nearby Esplanade. We just discovered the boat service because of the Pesta Madani event nearby the river and the ride was free because of that event. And that was a sheer bit of luck. 

As I drove to many other roads (Semambu - Beserah - Alor Akar junctions to Teluk Cempedak - Batu Putih - Kuantan Bypass - Bukit Rangin - Gambang) all memories came back in. You know that times when we were still studying and wondering what lies ahead. Well, now is "ahead" XD I still remember when I got to rent a car just to hangout with friends, to go to pasar malam nearby at Indera Mahkota, or just to clear my mind while driving. Everything rushed back in as I was immersed in driving while my 2 friends talking and chatting about life. 

That was (snippets) of my Awal Muharam story this year. The weather was giving the whole time until it was raining on our way back to KL. Hence, the dampen part of the story. It is not yet monsoon time, but it is already raining every now and then. 

***

Life has been incredible since I wrote on this blog. Not to mention in the past 1445H.

Though there were many plot twists, surprises come along to make crazy entrances too.

I shall embrace the highs and lows of this life.  After all, this life is made exquisitely for everyone, to be more hopeful, to take chances and grab opportunities. 

Nothing to highlight on this very post; just wanna say hello and giving insight on what's going to come next. 

I shall embrace my life. InsyaAllah.

Total reliance.

Penang, March 2022

 Bismillah.

I still remembered vividly the day, last week, where I REALLY want to eat pasta. 

Specifically, aglio olio pasta.

To be more particular, spicy aglio olio. Or anything that resembled spicy creamy thai pasta. I know, I sounded very entitled and privileged there T.T and mind you, I am not a pasta person XD Definitely not a "mac n cheese" person too! So for me to suddenly craving for a pasta is very out of the blue moon! 

My parents were not at home at that time, so I dragged my lil bro to eat for dinner. Specifically at Naili's Ampang. Eventhough it was first Saturday of the month - and school holiday has started; we can definitely expect the crowd there. But the urge to get there was everything.

Lets' just embraced that I really wanted to eat that.

Then we get to Ampang. It was near 8:40pm and it was slightly raining that time. As I drove around the Naili's, obviously packed with cars. And not to mention, people. 

Then I drove again for second round, with the high hope, and I really pray to Allah, accompanied with doa makan recitations, suddenly a car that parked exactly in front of Naili's showed reverse sign.

Then Ariff said, "Alhamdulillah rezeki". I was soooo happy! But let's not be just happy as yet. I asked Ariff to go inside and eyeing if there is any spot available for both of us.

And alhamdulillah - again - Allah swt granted my wish :')

Then Ariff showed some "Come" signal then I happily turned off my car and went into the restaurant.

Kinda relatable isn't it? :)

My very point is not that I want pasta and I got that. Nope.

But we really remember Him when we are in need of something :(

I just want to put it here so that I could remember that He hears my wishessss everytime. 

It is me that probably neglected. Ignored and even overlooked every little signs of Him.

When we are in need, we could do everything. Even recite everything just to make sure our du'a is granted. 

Sometimes, the objective of the du'a itself is questionable. Hmm

Whatever it is, the hope is there. We can do better everytime, as long as we are breathing. 

InsyaAllah

Happy Birthday!

 Bismillah.

Its been 4 months from the moment you typed this. 

And if you are alive, you will be 32 today! Yeay alhamdulillah! ^^

I truly hope you are wiser, calmer and more mature than today (this date 18/11/2021).

I hope that you already engaged, or found someone to live with your days ahead <3

Whatever you are doing now, do it with all of your heart. 

Please do not overthink. Just go with the flow and trust Him. And him; if he is still available.

You know marriage is not your priority now. Being the best you is.

By this time, you probably already went to Turkey too. Gosh remember 4 months ago you downloaded Turkey's maps just to get into the feeling :P

That is how you always are. Ambitious. Work hard play hard. And never settled for anything lesser.

Be the woman you always want to be.

I love you so much, Anis.

Yourself,

Anis. 

5 days to my convo ;)

 Bismillah.

Finally the day will come. 

The day when I finally graduated. Officially. 

Frankly speaking, I have never dream of graduating. What more attending my own convocation ceremony.

Tapi kuasa Allah swt tu melebihi segalanya T.T

My postgraduate journey was not a smooth sail - but worth it.

Alhamdulillah.

Aku banyaaaaaaak sangat belajar dengan manusia yg aku jumpa sepanjang my master journey ni. 

Yang manis, yang kelat. Yang bitter, yang happy. 

Semuanya!

Kalau ada yang bertanya, okay ke belajar master sampai bertahun-tahun?

Aku jawab "Okay je". Seriously. 

As long as kau kena kutip semua pengalaman dan hikmah berharga. Jangan pernah mengeluh.

Okay tipu, boleh la nak mengeluh sekali sekala. Aku bukanlah malaikat yang baik.

Banyak sangat air mata tertumpah, terasa hati jangan cakaplah. 

Tapi semua tu pengalaman. Yang alhamdulillah mengajar aku mengenai kehidupan.

And yang paling aku ingat, aku pernah doa la.

Aku harap aku finally jumpa jodoh aku, and kahwin lepas grad :P

Okay yang ni kan, aku tak tau lah. Aku serahkan semuanyaaaaa kat Allah swt.

If ada jodoh then ada. 

Kalau jodoh aku dah kat Syurga sana, then pandai2 la aku mengemudi diri aku sendiri kat dunia ni. 

Aku rasa 31 ni last la kot aku nak fikir beriya pasal kahwin ni. 

By the time January 2022, aku harap aku tak gedik sangat dah la.

Korang yang terbaca ni doakan la eh?

Walaupun calon macam kelabu2 asap lagi, takpe la kita doa je la ek.

Saje update blog. 

Yours,

Anis

[Overdue Post] : Letter to Anis #1

 Assalamualaikum, Anis.

It has been  5 months till the moment you typed this. 

I hope by this time, COVID-19 cases are going better. Lesser each day.

I hope by this time, you (Anis) are more wiser. Calmer being. And redha for everything that Allah swt has bestow upon you.

It's okay Anis.

Take your time. Its already written, and good timings for everything. 

You can't rush things. You MUST not. 

I hope you already find someone that loves you, and supports you and looking forward to be your husband - by this time. 

If not, then, start looking around for another opportunities to soar high!

I mean, find scholarship.

Anis. 28/1/2021

Everyday's Gratitude

 Alhamdulillah.

We will be entering second week of 2021.

How's your first week so far? I have nothing to wish but love as to start.

I came across this picture this morning. And it suddenly struck me in the heart.

The message was simple we usually found them so cliche.

But yelah, again, benda yang simple2 ni selalunya "mengena" kat hati. Right time. Right moment. 

It will just strikes.

Aku nak share sikit kenapa aku kata mesej "simple" ni mengena pada aku.

Waktu pre-covid dulu, boleh kata most of my weekends aku akan pergi KLCC Park utk did some jogs or running. Dulu a bit lighter so bole la kata slow run jugak XD

Then, utk masuk park tu, aku selalunya akan melalui bahagian hujung tepi Mandarin Oriental sebelah KLCC tu. So daripada aku jalan ke arah entry park, bila aku lalu MOKL ni, aku akan nampak glances of people having their breakfast kat cafe hotel tu. 

Tingkap cafe ni macam tinggi tau. And got several chandeliers yang cahayanya meliputi cafe tu. 

So kau bayang la aku lalu situ, sebagai peminat breakfast kat hotel (lol, ada ke yg tak suka?) aku ada semacam harapan dan impian laa. Konon la kan.

"One day nanti aku mesti nak tidur hotel ni and breakfast kat situ".

Haha mesti korang yg tgh baca ni kata gigih gila kan? Agak laa. 

Honestly setiap kali aku bukak Agoda, aku mesti "usha" harga semalam MOKL ni. Lepas tu mesti macam "Oh mahalnya..." haha sebab memang mahal pun! Mungkin sebab aku tgk suite ke I dunno.

Alhamdulillah, nak dijadikan cerita (padahal haritu update igstory bagai kemain) aku dapatlah tidur di MOKL ni for a night. Ala2 staycation, with my dearest officemate a.k.a colleague Aina & Fatinah. Ya Rabbi, Allah makbulkan doa yang satu ni, dalam keadaan yang paling subtle sekali (like He always did :') )

It was Aina who booked for us for 1-night stay. Thanks Aina <3

Inilah "tingkap" yang selalu aku tengok bila on the way nak masuk park KLCC tu gaiss :)

Yeaa inilah tingkap yang aku selalu "usha" tu. Bila masuk je cafe for brekkie then the staff let us in and guided us to this very spot! 

Waktu tu rasa ya Allah :')

Entahlah ek. Rasa macam laaa inilah one of the dreams aku dulu. Allah makbulkan tahun 2021.

Alhamdulillah wa syukr lillah.

Sambil bersyukur, sambil menganyam doa doa lain moga Allah swt makbulkan jua.

Sebab hati kita kena percaya, kalau ada antara doa-doa kita tak terrealisasi lagi, mungkin Allah swt tengah plan lagi "terbaik" lagi untuk kita.

I have learnt it the hard way, and bila kita rasa tak best pasal doa ni, cepat2 pujuk hati kita, Allah ada plan lain utk aku. Allah tengah selamatkan aku daripada doa aku sendiri niiiii.

Ha macam tu.

Berbalik kepada first pic kat atas tadi, after my stay kat my one of my dream hotel tu, aku terfikir la, oh sebenarnya kita ni kena ajar diri kita utk look into tiniest things possible to be grateful for in everyday. 

I mean, it doesn't always have to be pricey, or the nicest thing possible.

Because to be honest, lepas habis tidur semalam kat hotel tu, have a nice breakfast, aku tinggalkan hotel tu. And life resumes as usual.

Bukanlah nak kata hidup normal kat luar tak best. But my stay in that hotel buat aku lebih realize yang kita sendiri kena decide utk lebih bersyukur dengan hidup kita sehari-hari.

Aku suka untuk practice ini for my start in 2021. Cuba dan terus cuba. At least cuba kan.

Other than that, I always believe in aiming something so that we can look forward to life. Future.

So aku cuba la pasang beberapa achievable and dreamable targets for this year. 

Dah nak practice, dah aim bagai, yang lain - kita serahkan pada Allah. 

Doa minta jika itu yang terbaik, mudahkan.

Kalau itu benda baik untuk kita, mudahkan.

My cat, Bel, agree with me too ;)

Itulah first week aku setakat ini untuk 2021. 

Moga Allah kurniakan yang terbaik juga untuk kau yg membaca, dan aku yang menaip.

Bouquet adik daripada girlfriend dia. 

Till next post. 

Instead of work harder, aku suka perkataan keep on hustling.

Welcoming 2021~

 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh..

We just finally entered 2021, with hints of calmness (thanks to the heavy rain, some parts of Malaysia experiencing floods at this moment) and feeling "refresh" like never before.

I am not sure with others, but to finally passing 2020 was like a lump in the throat. 

I was kinda "looking forward" to year 2020 because it was the year that I finally "made it" to thirty-ish. 

A great of mine asked me that exact question every new year, like any other human being might do, but she asked me with no sense of annoyance at all - "Apa azam kau weh?".

While sipping Chinese herbal tea (Which is so unlike me), I replied, "Aku rasa aku macam nak amek segala pengajaran yg kita belajar waktu tahun 2020 and bawak ke tahun 2021".

Which is true, for me. Aku takde azam beriya this year.

Okay la ada la certain macam.. -

1. Aku nak lebih dekat dengan Allah SWT. Okay insyaAllah ini azam semua muslimin dan muslimat kan :)

2. Aku nak lebih "akur" dengan segala takdirNya. Tahun 2020 menyaksikan kita hanya mampu merancang, tapi finally Allah SWT jualah yang menentukan segalanya. Kita rasa PKP tu "whattttt???!!!" initially, tapi dengan izinNya, kita mampu melaluinya. Alhamdulillah, masih sihat. Tidak terjejas dengan pandemik COVID.

3. Aku ingin lebih pintar mengawal emosi. Ini pun "belajar" dari tahun 2020 jugak. What did we expected, semuanya di luar kawalan kita weh. Hatta kesihatan kita pun, walaupun duduk rumah diam-diam tapi possibility/infectivity rate tinggi jadi semua orang berpotensi to be contracted. Naudzubillahi min zalik. Jadinya, kita ini hanya mampu mengawal emosi supaya tak "overreacted" dengan semua perkara. Ini membawa kepada niat seterusnya...

4. Self-care is not selfish. Self-care ni bukan setakat 10 steps Korean skincare tu. Tapi lebih kepada jaga emosi, perasaan, hati... ya, hati. Jangan mudah nak bagi hati, jatuh hati, dendam kesumat ke hape. Haa. Fizikal. Haaa fizikal bila nak sihat kurus tu?

5. Aku berazam untuk LEBIH SIHAT. Allahu ini struggle setiap tahun kot, bukan tahun 2020 je :D Doakan aku dapat loose weight sikit supaya lebih mudah beribadah dan sihat sejahtera hendakNya.

Dan untuk mencapai senarai di atas, ada la beberapa baby steps to be taken.

Kahwin?

Ya weh. Umur bakal cecah 31 tahun ni. Tipu lah kalau aku cakap aku tak de lansung rasa nak kahwin. InsyaAllah ini pun ada dalam perancangan. Walaupun calonnya sumpah aku tak tahu siapa. Moga-moga jika ini yang terbaik, Allah SWT permudahkan langkah.

Sebab selain nak menyempurnakan "separuh agama", dan melunaskan tanggungjawab. Aku rasa nikah pun antara cara nak keluar dari zon aku yang sangat selesa ni. 

InsyaAllah.

What else?

Saje nak buat first post utk tahun baru ni :)

InsyaAllah 'till next post.

"Hang in there"

20 Ramadhan : italic

Alhamdulillah thumma alhamdulillah.

All prayers be to Allah swt.

We are entering the Final 10 Days of Ramadhan 1441H. 
The most quiet, slow Ramadhan I ever had in 30 years of living.
No iftar outside or in masjid (where we people miss the most T_T)
No iktikaf  or masjid hopping.

There is one statement from Imam Omar Suleiman in one of his trailer vid,
"While the doors of masajids (masjid) are closed, the doors of Allah's mercy is never close"

Subhanallah!
May we will always be reminded that Allah swt is Ever Existing.
Pre, During and Post Ramadhan <3 p="">
Something happened today that reminded me of all sayings; especially on efforts and success. As mentioned by Winston Churchill,
"Success always demands a greater effort".

Wow.
We can never type or write these until we succeed >.<

The story begins when my forever Sony red laptop of 11 years (est 2009) demands for a swap, I guess? I prepared almost EVERYTHING in this precious laptop. And to my known, it was only once this laptop has entered Sony Service Center. It becomes ancient, I know. The battery itself needs to be charged while using :D

It was during my viva session last December. Bayangkan you have prepared everything; those journals, revised versionssss of thesis, and slides (!!!!) dalam laptop ni, tiberrrrr 15 minutes before my session started, the screen became haywired.

Nothing. Projected. From. My. Laptop.

Rasanya kalau aku ni jenis kalut and menggelabah tak terkawal memang dah cuaks la.
Tapi sebab nak present agaknya, then my external examiners were already there! Gila betul situasi tu.

So I humbly asked for laptop from the grad school. Nonchalantly.

Mujur la tak bebal sangat buat pendua pentiga dalam email and my one and only free pendrive.

Begitulah ceritanya.

The moments were so humbled.

Then long story short after like 4 months my precious red laptop already repaired thanks to ayah. Now can even type this post using him (laptop) laa :)

Now comes another challenge.
All words in Google Chrome search engine and anything online became italic!!!

Mula-mula macam hmm romantic jugak (lol).
Dah bila start buat kerja rasa rimas la pulak! Semua senget dan bila nak guna italic dah tak tau dah applied ke belum -.-"

So I googled!

Rasanya throughout (half) of this PKP/MCO or whenever I try to use this laptop to carry out work aku akan search macam mana nak fix this problem! Sampai rasa jadi IT person, tak masuk coding je lagi nak ejah.

Alhamdulillah again. (And like always) Allah tolong.

Aku terjumpa this thread. Aku sebenarnya memang tak percaya sangat thread2 ni macam quora ke whatnot. But tak tahu benda ni bukan top on search engine pun just click2 here and there.

So, aku guna jugak la C:\Windows tu....

Alhamdulillah all fixed!

Aku siap copy dalam diary just in case it happens again in the future. 

So mula-mula most of the searches suggested that the Roboto font was disrupted. So dia tak boleh baca and becomes italic.

Memang ada la beberapa kali aku download Roboto pack tu. Ergh.

And suddenly, aku try for Arial pulak.
Then betullah, it was Arial yg problematic. Not Roboto.

So bila font tu disrupted, or faulty, system tak boleh baca. Tu yg jadik Arial Italic semua benda.

Subhanallah, bagusnya la hai yang belajar IT and system ni kan.
Cabang ilmu yang tak semua pakar. Of course la semua orang ada kepakaran masing masing kan.

Aku akan sujud syukur for this answer :')

Ini antara pelajaran kehidupan la. Yang kita tak mungkin belajar formally in classes, unless you enrol for that SPECIFIC class.

Another one is during baking.

Aku takdelah aktif sangat buat Raya cookies, nak order pun macam siapa je nak makan.
Previously buat beriya pun last-last ada yg buang. 

So this year since tak ada or sangat sikit tetamu, then we just bake several types of cookies yang mungkin akan makan.

And previously, of course lah kita main buat je kan ikut resepi.

Tahun ni ada la belajar sikit2. Since duduk rumah je so banyak lah masa. 
Contohnya, dulu aku wondering sangat kenapa kena letak cuka dalam chocolate chips cookies?

The acidity in buttermilk is important for helping leaven quick breads, which are made without yeast, and depend on an acid-base reaction to keep breads light and fluffy. 

The acid found in buttermilk reacts to bases — most commonly baking soda — creating carbon dioxide gas. The gas presents itself as small bubbles throughout the batter or dough, giving the quick breads their light, airy structure. 

However, because this chemical reaction is not long lasting, goods made with buttermilk as a leavening agent need to be cooked soon after mixing; otherwise, the bubbles will deflate, leading to heavy, dense-textured foods.
(https://oureverydaylife.com/the-purpose-of-buttermilk-in-baking-12258290.html)

Interesting kan?

Haha macam belajar Sains pulak. Of course la sains makanan.

So ada la baca baca sikit saje nak tambah ilmu tak formal.

Many of us pun mungkin belajar something kan during this MCO? I hope it will helps us or others nanti in the future, if not now.

InsyaAllah.

Don't despair in this MCO. And His Bountiful Mercy.

Lets' keep on learning and putting effort in everything we do insyaAllah, nanti Allah swt balas sebaiknya!

'Till then.

8 Ramadhan 1441.

It has been 44 days of Movement Control Order (MCO) established in Malaysia. 

And today is 8th Ramadhan 1441H. A week has passed like a blink of eye. 

Whatever we are going through at the moment will be scribbled as history, probably in another 50-100 years time. It is when the world is affected by a pandemic COVID-19 and almost all countries around the world experiencing lock down or partial lock down or movement control order like here in Malaysia.

You know just like the Spanish Flu in 1918.

What a deal.

Before that, let me confessed that I just knew the word lockdown from U-Know's Under Armour Ad for winter edition with themed "U-Know Lockdown" earlier this year. Lol.

Sorry tak penting dan menambahkan iman lansung. But seriously aku tak pernah dengar pun perkataan lockdown before ni.

On 18th March, we went through pre-MCO period until 31st March. For some, it was quite a deal since we cannot go to work as usual and such. 

Me myself, a self-proclaimed outgoing person (I guess) was thrived at first. Imagined the freedom of driving was restricted and there were so many road blocks with police. 

Then some of my close friends were asking if I was okay :D

Honestly, it was an adaptation. 

It was like a caffeine withdrawal syndrome. Or maybe like someone who is going through a sugar cutting period.

The first 2-3 days were horrible. It was not that I am anxious about what's going to happen but to stay at home, I mean, working at home, I was distracted most of the time. 

To get my thesis done previously has involved many trips to public uni's libraries. Cafes. And sometimes sneaked into Aqlili's PG room. It was not easy. I am not the type who can stay at home and get my job done. And guess what, I sent in my soft copy of thesis to the grad school at my previous office in Prudential. To that extent.

Well, that was me. Previously.

This MCO has taught me a lot about life.
Basically, it taught us to go back to basics. To look into ourselves, to sound a bit cliche. As a reflection for ourselves.

Especially this year where I just entered 30. 
It was like a "pause" year. 

And I just realized, that is why some people take more times to decide. That is because they are MINDFUL of what they are deciding. 

Mindful. 

And just before MCO, I planned to buy a book entitled "Contemplation".

You see, I was in awe a bit when I ironed out things just now. 

I don't know. I am not THAT busy earlier this year. There were of course things that played around in my mind, especially in job. I did (and sometimes do) felt unsettled with my current job. 

My life. I thought it was just a phase. 

Little did I know that we were going into this period and THAT probably a sign for me to slow down. 

Rain that welcomed 1st Ramadhan.

These are some things that I have learnt so far. Of Day 44 MCO. 

• Every feeling is valid right now. This is what I learnt during early MCO days. Because everyone (myself included) tend to read MORE comments on social media, so we tend to release our own opinion (without being asked lol) and easily bashing other people/party. It was when I realized that the situation kinda accounted for the actions we did. Because not everyone has same coping mechanism, especially towards changes in routine. Some can cope easily while others, it requires time. So we tend to express our feelings easily during these days.
• We tend to reflect ourselves more. There are times where we can easily "escape" from things we don't want to deal. Especially about our well being. Conditions of our hearts. Or family matters. Most of the time (previously) we tend to ignore because we are so busy with other things. Distracted, you see? So during this MCO with every movement were restricted we HAVE TO face the reality, the real condition of our hearts, and we cannot escape from them, now. It is time to mend things out.
• We can "start" to practice mindfulness. I read Raja Sarina's blog on this topic and it hits me every single point she mentioned. All these while, especially when we entered 2020, I do realized that most people and of course including myself, were really distracted most of the time. It was either by too much information (TMI) to be consumed, or haywired, or we kinda have so much to do with so little time (kononnya), so much social media accounts to update with. We tend to procrastinate. We hardly focus in what we are doing. OMG bitter truth right? Spit it out. So this MCO came to rescue of our well being. 
• I read a book called "Seni Berfikir yang Hilang" by Ust Hasrizal Abdul Jamil which was published with the sole intention to teach us on how to build a thinking framework in this TMI world.
• Lessen our time with social medias is helpful. But not everyone has the same coping situations during this time. Some people may have to binge on dramas, let them be. But, lessen our time to read on COVID-19 could help reduce the anxiousness.
• Try to do things that we hardly do during normal weekdays. This is one of the major things that I have learnt and realized during this MCO. I even discussed it with some of my close friends during video call, we always sighed of things that we cannot do because of lack of time. Now is the MCO where we have plenty, bountiful of time but still, we hardly do morning/evening adzkar :(
• Use this precious time to sort out our mind, responsibilities, people in life. It is during this "isolation" time that is best to take some moments and figure out things that are worth our attention. We felt so hectic previously because of uninvited dramas surrounding us. Or probably busy thinking about toxic people that came in and out our everyday lives. Or maybe unnecessary "tasks" that we focus in, and finally distracted to finish our own, real tasks. It is during this time that I feel soothe at its best :D Because of working from home now, I can be myself and ignore unnecessary people to get involve in my life.
• Practice of making lots of good intentions before every task. Before doing every single task, let's put some niyyah in. It is when we are intentional then we are less likely to rush through things. I learnt this from Sarina's blog too! 
• Now is the time to achieve, or to rest. You choose! For some people, they need to have short term goals in order to move forward. So they sign up webinars, countless online classes just to tick the goals off every time. But it truly depends on individual and we are not obliged pun to do so. Again, let them be. Let them eat cake. Gituu. For rest of other people, it is time to heal. To get some rest. Then please do so. Kenapa ayat aku dah macam motivator ceh.
• Now we might don't have freedom to move around, but inside. Of all other things to reflect, I did do some throwbacks to all things that happened before MCO. You know what I misses the most? My precious me-time. My maghrib or isyak session at Masjid al-Hidayah. My short errands to bookstore. My short visits to drink some coffee. My close friends :D my weekend morning at KLCC park, or any other park. Weekend evening strolling in Putrajaya with ibu. Attending usrah. And even traffic jams :D Seriously I missed all of them! Now that I realized I have taken all for granted previously, and you will see on how I will invest my time after this MCO ends. I am so gonna re-live every moment again and ignore all petty issues that kinda stuck in my head. No no no. I will be more selfish with my time after this. 

Well, that is all of major things that I realized. Of course there are millions of other tiny things that I learnt too. I have this aim to publish more post during this Ramadhan and may Allah grant me good ideas and hikmah for me to ponder and share more. 

Phew, this is long enough.

Sorry for the haywire thoughts. I need to read and write more after this. 

'Till then.

13/366. Anew.

Belated post....

So Google did sent me statistics on my whereabouts for 2019.

It did showed that I have been to 53 cities within country - haha!

Looking at this stats, I am rewinding my days back in 2019; where random people comes and go, unexpected events took place.

Lepas tu aku terfikir, apa aku nak buat lepas ni?

Between 2 posts.

"An attempt is always better than absolute absence"

It's 9.9.19. 

The date itself is so beautiful, though I went through nerve-wrecking events which made me not looking forward to September and just skip this month or wake-me-up-when-September-ends situation earlier.

I would have wished things to be better, at times. But most of the times, things get better and I thank Him that things went according to His will. Not mine. 

Alhamdulillah.

It's been almost 3 months of working in new place (as I mentioned in previous post which I realized I sounded kinda excited to start working again lol). Fast forward to this date, second Holiday Monday - no blues one, and I cringe to send my resignation letter tomorrow. 

Phew.

Kelakar kan?

Serius kelakar. Kelakar yang macam eh nak gelak ke tak ni?

I was counting days to work in my previous post. And looking forward to resign in my current post.

How funny  cool is that.

And my life, in between these 2 posts, have been hectic. Not frantic one. But really enough to get me hiccups in between, and mild palpitations, cried a bit.

Yes, I cried.

Then my new fellas in my current office offered their shoulders. And reminds me that it's okay to cry.

The testament that I forever forget every time.

My life again, between these 2 posts, have taught me to really, I mean, really thankful of life.

Gratitude.

Solitude.

And how I find that everything we do now, is the preparation of our own future. 

Indescribable.

Well, I should have write exactly after I went through that moment. I will insyaAllah.

And I found Momentum to provide me with daily dose, some sort of instant motivation. 

We all need one.

Woke up with irregular patterns of sleep these 2 weeks. Sleepless!

Tired of getting nervous

As I realized, with regards of my own age, I am getting tired of getting nervous. How's that.

Instead of getting nervous - I try my best to enjoy and embrace every moment. Though most of the times, it seems almost impossible to enjoy one. 

Well, the choice remains ours :)

Muka lepas seharian update thesis and tunggu result yang tak berkesudahan :P

Thank you to my family and close friends for being there all along.

Okay cukup untuk sekarang.

The rest I'll post again after successfully submitting thesis!