Happy 2013

2012 has been one hell of a roller coaster ride for me and I hope that 2013 will be a better year for me, with less drama in my life and more achievements. Here comes the time to reflect on things that I've done last year and set aims and goals for the new year which, I hope, I stick to. Probably because it's been a shitty 2012, I don't really get all hyped up about the new year. But nevertheless, the bad year is gone, Mayan Apocalypse didn't happen (Didn't really believe in it anyway haha) and we all survived.

Alright, so new year's resolutions for 2013:

1) Lose weight, exercise 2 times per week! I gotta be weighing at maximum 48kg!!
2) Consistently revising my school work and to stop procrastinating.
3) Keeping my dear ones close to me and not wasting time on people who are not worthy. 
4) Save more money!
5) Learn something new. (Maybe guitar or sewing!)
6) Reduce time on TV!
7) Stick to the new year's resolutions 1 to 6!

Have you made your new year's resolutions already? Happy new year everyone! ;)

Dialogue in the dark

I've always been a fan of exhibitions. So anyway, WJ and I went to this exhibition called Dialogue in the Dark. Basically, there wasn't anything to see because we got the chance to experience what it felt like to "see" things in the dark. Our guide, William, who was visually-impaired, helped us to navigate around the various scenes being set up in the exhibition such as parks, town area, cafe and so on. We even got to sit on a boat which felt so real! I felt that it was much more meaningful than in those exhibitions that we can to see things, because in the dark, we had to make use of other senses to move around. William had also shared with us his experience and what he went through after finding out that he would gradually go blind, while we were in the dark. I've learnt how I can help the visually-impaired and most importantly, got to experience the life of a visually-impaired person in the hour of the exhibition. The most meaningful takeaway of this exhibition was the positive mindset and determination that I saw from William, which was really inspiring to me and encouraging to me. If you're thinking of going for a special exhibition, different from the ordinary ones, this is one you should go to!

Red

Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street 

Faster than the wind 

Passionate as sin, ended so suddenly

Cherish

They say that friends in secondary school and JC go a long way with you. I guess it's all true. I've met the best girls in secondary school and the best bunch of crazy people in JC! I'm really glad to have them still with me, close and still in contact, because I know these are the people who have handled me at my worst and shared with me my joys. I don't think I'll meet people like them anymore in this new school. I prolly haven't tried to be open to new people I meet, but I guess I don't really find the need to because I feel that I already have the best with me and that's really all I need. Love you guys! xoxo!

Uncertainty

It's one wave after another. Just when I'm feeling much better already from all the drama in my life and being more adaptive in school, more problems have to come. 2012 is a year of never-ending misery. Sometimes I wish I could tell the future, so that I can change things before the unforeseen hits me.

My family now, more than ever, is of utmost importance to me. I've never felt so strongly before, but I guess as I grew older, seeing how things in the house changed over the years, I longed for it to stay the way it was when I was young. I'll go on and on if I were to talk about our shared memories together as a family but I wouldn't because now's the time I've got to learn to put everything behind.

Secret Garden

Went to Tanjong Pagar Railway Station with Karen recently for The Gift of Time exhibition by Hermès! Exhibition was pretty cool and interesting and the railway station was such a lovely place to be at! Pictures we took still turned out fantastic despite the heat wave that day!

So, I just finished watching Secret Garden. I know, I know, I'm behind time. But, this is by far the best dramas I've ever watched! It was so touching. I cried badly, went on to repeat my favourite scene (Also known as the saddest scene in the entire series) and cried even more terribly. And as I'm typing here, I'm downloading the episodes to re-watch again hahaha.

Quoted from Secret Garden:
"I hope you’ll see the things I see. You’ll stand at the window where I stand, and lie down in the bed where I lie and read the books that I read. If we could be together, even if it's in that way... then that’s good enough. Let’s think of it as being together. That’s good enough for us to consider ourselves as happy as other lovers." - Joo Won

Guilt

I've never felt more guilty before in my whole entire 19 years of life. My parents have always been supportive of decisions I've made even when outcomes of my decisions proved to be nothing but disappointments. I know they don't want to put too much stress on me because they know I'm still drowning in my own pool of depression. My dad is always asking me why I look so gloomy and my mum always making and buying my favourite dishes nowadays. It's not making me feel any better. I wish they'll scream at me, beat me up or throw me out of the house instead of being so forgiving.

Burn it down

I can't believe my 8 months holiday is coming to an end. School will be starting next Mon. This time round, I'm not gonna screw anything up. I have to walk out of this depression zone, put what's over behind me and buck up. I wouldn't say I've completely stopped feeling shitty, but at the very least, I feel much better than I was initially after the reality bomb dropped. To be frank, I still do carry a heavy sense of guilt and remorse on my heart when I face my parents. I still do not have the courage to let people know. I still hate myself for the way things had turned out.

On a side note, for those who have yet to try Starbucks' Hojicha, go grab one! IT'S SO GOOD!! Major craving for this right now.