having 2 stupid idiot brother at home.. really can cause a big super suey day... i dun like them... they always bully me... when they got time.. is bully me.. arghhh... stupid right?? how come i have this kind of brothers... liew.. haiz.. i cannot the family i have or the members i wan to have... is all already plan properly before i am born... haiz... sob sob...


oh well.. life still have to go on... oh man.. i being crying for.. 2 days... sob sob... ytd cry... becoz.. i think of xiao michael... sob sob... i miss xiao michael so much... and!~! i got a cut on my toe ytd.. coz i playing with my penknife.. haiz.. sad... blood le.. liew.. i hate bloody thing.. but i never say i hate my toe!~!~! haha.. is my toe after all.. T.T


hmmm... let me show u all some photo i took recently.. hehe.. some ppl say i become more pretty liao wor.. holala..

hehe... this is me and summer.. oh i remember.. we take this on the 25 of aug.. the last day of my exam paper.. haha.. after tat... i come store.. and she knock off liao ma.. den ask her go for lunch.. i haven eat.. sob sob.. hungry u kw... we went to northpoint.. we chit chat a lot sia.. we go eat some japan food.. the name.. oh ya!! Yoshinoya~! haha.. when we eat finish... oh man.. super full.. den we saw somebody... xue leong and wei ren.. well.. we also saw yu ying walk pass.. haha.. but i bet she never see us there.. we chat a while.. den we go take this neoprint le.. hmm.. this pic.. cute hoh?? haha.. but.. a bit like ribbit teeth like tat le.. liew.. act cute only.. haha..

woah woah.. this one.. well.. i look pretty normal... haha.. but summer~! dun u all think she is cute in this picture.. hahaha.. got the feeling wanna pinch her face rite?? lol...

for this one... summer face a bit too white liao la.. look so.. woah.. hari stand.. man.. i really dun look like 18 lo.. looking younger and younger.. hahaha.. woah.. this pic.. almost wanna... erm... nth... haha..

LET ME INTRODUCE~!~! my favourite drink~! CCCF~!~! this is cccf... the one i keep talking abt.. Chocolate Cream Chip Frappuchinno... hoalala... look great rite?? but i advice u all to drink on that spot instead of bringing it home den drink.. coz the taste will be super not nice.. is nice.. but.. but the real taste u wan... so.. drink it on that spot.. u will feel like u in heaven... so nice~!~! hahaha...

2 of my fren.. jasper and joanna.. omg.. the j-team... lol.. i just gave de.. coz.. haha.. both name start with the letter j... i see this photo.. i can really laugh out u kw.. see jasper.. tat stupid face.. lol.. really so funny.. i cannot stop laughing... laugh in tears. waahahaha...

this is sok mui~!~! as i always mention in my blog.. hahaha.. she become pretty liao wor... taken this on my birthday.. well.. on this special day... cannot forget to take photo de ma.. hahaha... we both have the same surname.. tat why we are more close together.. hehe.. we are very close... but i kind of... nvm... hahaha.. anyway.. he is a very nice person.. kw how to take care of me too.. hehe.. thx mui...

HEY!~! what u looking at.. huh~! wahaha.. forget when i took this.. but i sure is this month... i went to mac.. to my SEAT~! haha.. the seat i always sit.. and.. yiyi is working... i am sure.. and he was playing with this spec... oh ya.. i remember... i got my lap top with me.. so i think is after schooling bah.. yiyi also got bring his lappy.. well.. he was dancing.. michael jackson.. lol.. den i take this spec and take photo.. haha.. do i look fierce?? but i dun think so bah... look funny lo.. instead of fierce.. liew... hahha..

HELL~ no mood to write liao...

woah... due to exam.. and my birthday... haha.. and also due to fatigue.. i never come update wor.. haha.. no choice.. too lazy... let start from my birthday bah~ my birthday fall on the 12 Aug.. wahahha.. this is one of the picture i took using zhili phone..







woah~ nice rite?? i like this photo so much.. look so great man.. wahahha... and one more thing!! I GOT WEAR OKAY!!! ppl keep saing me naked bla bla bla.. aiyoyo.. i got wear clothes la.. haha.. can u all see the exit sign?? I AM OUTSIDE!!! of coz will wear.. haha..








ok ok.. this is zhili.. AH BENG LOOK RITE!!! haha.. taken this in mrt while we going home.. hahaha... see... look so beng... wahahhaa... can't believe he younger den me by 2 weeks... ahaha.. oh ya~ today his birthday~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU xiao di di.. wahahhaa...

i love this so much~ wahaha.. i love all my photo so much.. so cute rite?? this one?? wow.. everyone the same pose!!!! wahahaha... LET ME INTRODUCE!!!! from the left.. is YANG CHING!!! my 15 years fren!~!~ next~ at the center... is SOK MUI!!! my very good very in secondary sch~ and our surname is the same wor~ and on the right.. is YIWEN!~ my dearly cousin.. wahahahhahaa.... from small play to big wor~ weee... AND THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON!~ ME~!~!~! i at the bottom one wor... so cute~ i love it so much.. but.. T.T leg very sour u kw... HAIZ...

hmmm... went for the firework before go for dinner... and was playing pool the whole afternoon.. spend up to nearly $200... haiz.. pocket big hole... well.. when we go home... i went back with yiyi wor... hmmm.. den yiyi called up xiong.. coz he was working.. hehe.. but i was kind of tired after a long day.. den decided not to go find xiong at YRR... well.. coz i mention to yiyi that.. a birthday.. without a birthday cake... sad rite?? haiz.. den yiyi went go 7-11 and buy me a cake.. omg.. so touched... haha.. den he ask xiong come along.. me and yiyi was waiting under xiong blk.. the playground there.. hehe.. well.. i wondering.. how they going to settle the candle.. i tot xiong will bring it bring YRR.. but nope... guess what they replace?? matchstick.. hehe.. well.. they try sing 2 birthday song to me b4 it burn out.. and i also try to make my birthdya wish a fast one.. i make 3 wishes... glad tat one of it came true... my grandma recover.. my dad also ok.. but.. he have to go have a operation in abt 2 weeks time.. and he was saying.. the doctor got to take his whole heart out... what the hell.. take out.. HOW CAN!!! liew... haiz... was still wondering how to go to the stupid hospital... haiz...

ok... exam... everything go so fine.. haha.. i always so top few to go off sia.. T.T kind of... feeling weird u kw.. coz.. so many ppl stare at u when u go off.. haiz... haha.. but i sure.. i will have a good result.. holalala...


hmmmm... ytd... went DRINK~! holala.. meet up ter ter in the afternoon... after tat... haiz.. dun say tat le.. stupid!~! haha.. WAIT ZHILI SO LONG!!! a few hours lo.. wa kao.. well.. simon came too.. he drove us all to central mall there.. waahhaha.. we went to sky.. oh man... i drink finish 1 cup... feel so warm.. heartbeat so fast... den eye a bit wan to close.... wahaha... well.. ter ter and simon went to play pool ma... den throw me alone there.. den got this uncle.. liew.. a bit pervert i feel.. but.. is not pervert la.. he just drunk.. 100%.. he was drink black lebel whisky with his fren.. den his fren go off.. den left him alone.. den he was trying to chat with me.. but i cannot hear him talking... too noisy le.. den i just ya ya.. hahaha.. den i was a bit seh.. i am sure i seh le.. den i drink another 1/2 cup... woah.. den really seh seh a bit liao.. haha.. well.. ter ter came back to the table.. haha.. den coz.. keep sitting down.. very sian.. den i walk to simon there see him play pool.. woah... when stand up.. a bit giddy sia.. lucky i still can walk.. but leg very soft.. hohoho... should be drunk liao lo.. but my mind very clear man... so clear.. haha.. well.. i went toilet quite a number of time.. T.T no choice.. haha..


well.. i told ter ter my heartbeat quite fast le.. den he was like dun kw thinking what lo.. den he go take one cup of water give me... haha.. to cool me down la.. well.. really.. not drunk after tat.. haha.. den ter ter.. pour 1/2 more cup to my cup.. haha.. well.. zhili drink de la.. zhili so late den come lo... den i went toilet.. come back... WOAH!! he drink finish... i was so chock.. so fast lo.. well.. when i go toilet.. MY EYES SO RED!!! haha.. cfm kind of drunk liao.. well.. sing 2 song at there.. first tong.. tong hua.. sing with zhili.. 2nd song.. zhu wo sheng ri kuai le.. wee... at 12am wor.. and is zhili birthday.. coz pass 12 le.. hehe.. den wish him happy birthday.. i first wor.. wahaha.. when i sing.. wahaha.. zhili was like so surprise sia.. ter ter also sing.. but.. sound weird le.. with his voice inside too.. :x holala..


haiz... i not drunk in the end.. ter ter and zhili both drunk.. kind of drunk la.. simon being the most gentleman~ haha.. he send us all home.. he went back.. den came back again... maybe he see me at there.. den not save u kw.. haha.. den send us home.. hmm.. first stop is ter ter hse.. liew.. zhili and me sit behind.. shit sia.. he take me as his pillow.. he really like a small children sia.. aiyoyoyo... he really drunk... when reach ter ter hse there.. a wu lu place.. but!!! 30 storey high le!!! the bulding.. woah.. so high... well.. i give zhili a few slap on his place.. hmm.. 20 plus slap?? hahhaa... keep on slap slap slap.. ask him wake up.. wahahha.. so happy slapping him... holala.. oh well.. simon got to make phone call.. den ter ter wanna see us go le den go.. haha.. they was having a fight in the car.. zhili was going to kiss ter ter.. WAHAHA.. so funny.. ter ter was like.. shouting like siao... ahahha.. den ter ter keep on knock zhili head.. haha.. well.. end up.. wan play one me liao.. tat stupid zhili say.. ter.. come we kiss ruby.. OMG!! i was like.. WA KAO!!! wan play dun play on me.. what i do was.. cover my face.. holala.. den zhili go kiss my hand.. phew... as for ter ter le.. he never do anything la.. he just use his hand and play play.. haiz.. den simon came back.. phew.. lucky simon ask zhili sit in front.. but zhili say he wan sit with me.. but phew.. LUCKY AR!!! simon die die ask him sit in front.. i am free~ holala...


i try to slp slp behind.. i really almost fall asleep.. untill.. something drop on my leg.. haha.. is just sticker.. inside the car.. coz.. open window ma.. coz our body got this smoke smell.. no choice.. haiz.. the wind... hit on my face.. this feeling.. dun kw how long dun have le.. hehe.. well.. next stop is zhili hse... woah... he throw up man.. poor boy.. hahaha.. den his hse~ another very wu lu wu lu de... haha.. private le.. liew.. so wu lu.. well.. den finally my hse.. holala... i fall a sleep sia... slp till my neck wanna crack.. T.T haiz.. bo bian.. haha..


hmmm.. today... nothing big happening also.. haha.. tml got to go work... haiz.. sad... large order.. haiz.. GAMBATEH!!!

well.. my cute little hamster know stunt sia.. know how to open his own door.. haha.. found him in the kitchen.. and is my mum tat found him.. haha.. he also said that she almost step on him.. haha..


yawn........ so tired.... so stressful... haiz...


well.. ytd soo an birthday.. i meet up joanna at bishan... i went mos burger find her... quite surprise to see xiong there.. haha.. they both were fighting like little kids... so funny.. well.. when i reach there.. they were laughing.. coz xiong spill his soup.. 1/2 gone.. LOL!!! the tray still got evidence sia.. hahaha.. den when i buy my food.. T.T my turn to spill.. lucky never kanna me.. coz is hot de le!!!!!!!!! hahahahha... well.. mine.. only left 1/4... but they change it for me... coz i spill infront of the crew there... hahaha...


eh eh~~~~~ xiong gave me a present ytd also.. weeeee... a teddy... well.. if i were to ask him... what he gave me last year.. i can sure that he dun remembered.. hahaha... well.. he gave me the present just like tat sia.. liew.. not even a "happy advance birthday"... liew... well.. i more angry!!! is tat!! HE 4GOT MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!! he said my birthday is on the 11th aug and not the 12 aug which is tml.. liew.. i almsot cry out in front of him.. tears did come out.. but i never face them... haiz... what a sad case...


at soo an birthday....... at KTV... i only sang 2 song... hahaha.. den went to joanna hse and lend shoe from her... T.T coz i 4got i got presentation today... den 4got to buy.. haiz.. lucky i can wear her shoe.. and lucky!! i never wear FROM my hse... leg sure pain... T.T


today... presentation ok lo.. wahahhahahaha... well.. my group didn't win any prize.. coz the other group really very good.. haha... but!!! i alone got one prize!!!!!!!! the best E-Tutorial + bonus prize.. WAHAHA!! i hang in late~ i still got the prize.. so happy.. i anyhow anyhow put the website de le.. still got the prize.. so lucky... weeeeeeeee.. i am the lucky hong bao shi~~~~ WULALA~~~


haiz.. go see my dad soon... hope the guys faster do finish they study... if not cannot go.. T.T


Happy birthday Ying Ying... Happy birthday cousin... so many ppl birthday.. T.T

gosh.. having high fever... last measure 38.64 degree... haiz.... really very jialat.. keep on vomiting... now den i kw.. being stress.. being pressure... can coz one person to sick untill like this.. haiz...


really so sick... throw up for more den 5 times... cannot even slp properly.. what is troubling me??? why i will fall sick again... fever i having now.. is more worst den 2 weeks ago de fever... haiz.. i freezing cold... whole body so hot.. but i feel so cold... temperature keep rising... i really feel so terrible.. can't slp at all also.. haiz...


i hate being pressure.. and now???? all the things happen in one day.. haiz... no wonder i collaspe... haiz.. poor me..

why!!! all the bad thing happening to me.. first.. my grandma in hospital... den my whole family sick.. finally.. grandma tml can discharge from hospital.. but now??? father end up in hospital... fuk lo!!!


early in the morning.. heard tat xiong went smoking... i send msg over to him.. not once.. but twice.. end up?? no reply.. as usual.. 4ever wun see him reply.. suan le... use to it le.. have a short chat with joanna when i on the way home from school.. well.. i wondering.. is he taking my words as a puff of wind passing his ear... or he really taking it seriously?? haiz.. now.. i kw le.. if he like to do tat.. i will let him be.. i kw i said this a lot of time.. but.. this time.. i'm really... let him be le.. since he is happy.. and nothing i can do to get him out of smoking... let it be bah... joanna told me.. he didn't reply me.. coz he dun kw what to reply.. but do u kw.. never reply... will make it worst?? she told me.. u ask her not to tell me.. coz u afraid tat i will cry... is not her fault on telling me.. she help u say so much of gd thing... but.. when CK told me.. less den a week ago.. u ask him out for smoke.. hahaha.. i didn't cry dun worry.. i wun cry in front of yiyi.. i wun cry in front of so many ppl...


i am an unreasonable person.. a person that dun kw what is right or wrong.. a person tat only force people... i am a totally failure... i bet some people out there will laugh at this.. coz.. what they prey for is finally came true... but sorry.. all this.. is just words... no way ur motive will came true.. u moron...


fine.. i understand.. i keep forcing u to quit smoking.. like what u said.. too much concern can scare u... and now... i am scaring u... does this mean that i should not concern abt u anymore??? or what... do u think i like to force u??? do u think i wun kw what u will feel whenever i do something tat u dun like it.. u said is all a stage of growing up.. ok.. u go grow up.. i cannot ask u to stop growing up.. if tat the way u wanna grow up.. i cannot stop u.. coz is ur life.. i cannot interfere.. these what u wan right?? freedom from me.. ok.. now u got it.. u are free.. as i mention.. i wun interfere ur life... whatever u do.. i wun say anything.. i will just stand one side...


ruby is a heartless animal.. her heart ache so much when saying every single words.. no one understand how pain her heart is.. why can't she just might her own business and stop interfering others people life?? is not fun to kw abt others ppl life... anyway... no ppl understand her.. even her own bf..


i just hate it.. a birthday.. also need to fight.. if is like tat.. call if off.. i dun wan to celebrate any birthday.. even if it is my important 18 years on earth... i dun wan to have a so stressful de birthday... just now.. i still happily playing with yiyi.. and now??? everything is so.. different.. bad news one by one getting into my ear.. everyone was like a knife stabbing my heart.. who will ever hear my heart crying???

what else can i say other den boring??? haha.. morning skip Eg1.. but now?? blueprint.. do nothing.. coz i finish the work long ago.. see.. i so hardworking.. so fast finish.. haiz.. come school?? enjoy air con nia.. haiz... sian... den ask them go study, they dun wan.. coz they dun wan study mechanic.. lol.. like tat also can.. well.. but i still will go study.. coz.. i love study... weeeeeee...


poor yang ching.. wan to study.. dun wan study.. lol... wan my help... but.. dun wan study coz wan go see firework.. liew.. exam coming liao le.. study firework.. lol.. u wan firework?? i can give u... but only one colour nia.. POPCORN~~~~~ FLY~~~~~ wahahahaha... still can eat somemore sia.. if got spare pop corn.. haha..


sian ar... in school really do nothing.. come here enjoy my computer song.. write blog.. play lappy.. watch movie(in lappy).. chat msn... liew.. if tat the case.. i rather stay yishun self-study man.. damn super boring... haiz.. if i kw.. i would stay home.. haiz...


anyway.. i am very happy.. coz.. my grandma tml discharge from hospital le.. so happy... weee... discharge on National Day.. wahahaha... so special day... well.. at least.. she never see those thingy in hospital again.. i think is becoz of all the needle and stuff making her scare.. and the fear make her anyhow think.. tat why she say got thingy disturb her... haha.. weeeee... after everybody take care of her.. day and nite.. accompany her... i think.. she not scare already.. well.. my mum hardly can see grandma.. this time.. sure got a lot of stuff to say... haha.. so sweet.....


well.. early in the morning.. somebody told me.. saw one PIG smoke in school... oh well.. i msg tat pig.. but.. he didn't reply.. seem like... nvm... suan le.. since he never do what he promise me... what for i care.. is being a while already.. so long... 1/2 year??? or more den that... haiz... i think is already very long for u to give up on tat le bah??? what u promise me anyway?? izzit an empty promise?? u said before.. coz i the first one to ask u to quit... tat why u determine to quit.. and now??? did u ever think of what u said to me before u light one up??? haiz... u really pig!!! haiz... how could u do that... kw why everytime i see u.. i will ask that.. coz.. when u start to smoke.. till now.. u old so much... (dun give me -_- de face).. hahahaha... ok.. stop the crap... u become.. as in... haiz.. dun kw how to phrase.. say u change.. also wrong.. say u old.. also wrong.. i just kw.. is different.. coz it was like.. become.. an lao ah pek or sot.. lol!!!! haha.. dun kw use what words to phrase it man.. i really wan to kw.. when den u really will do what u promise me?? u need time.. tat what u say.. 1/2 year le.. time still not enough?? how many time u still need?? 1 year?? 2 year?? 10 year?? do u think i can wait so long?? u kw promise mean a lot to me.. haiz.. 你真是个大笨蛋..


haiz.................. COME SCHOOL FOR NOTHING......... arghhhhh... waste my time.. sob sob..

i am so scare... this fear is so... scary... my heart hurt.. is so hurt... i really can feel the ache... really very nan shou... is just like.. heartbeat will stop anytime... any minute.. any second.. haiz... i really very xin ku.. i am just a big cry baby after all... i back to the depression self again... a part of me tat torture me most...


my mum told me.. my grandma seeing "things" in hospital.. disturbing her... shaking her bed.. spray water.. disturb... all over.. under her bed.. beside her.. even on top of her.. grandma is scare... last night.. she pluck out all the needle... den keep shouting saying she wanna go home.. den my big aunt stay overnite to accompany her.. den this morning.. my mum go take over... my mum told me.. grandma keep saying out names.. well.. all my uncles aunty names... saying she wanna go home.. bring her home..


when i heard these.. i so scare.. coz.. there is this story in STGS book 14... almost totally identical to my grandma.. they were saying... "when one person is close to their death, they can see those stuff"... in tat story, the author grandma suffer from heart attack and some other illness.. den also.. same to my grandma.. the author grandma saw stuff in the hospital and also keep ask her children to bring her home.. den after discharged from hospital 1 week... she passed away peacefully...


i really so scare.. coz my papa also say so.. coz he was saying.. Lao Ah Ma(dun really kw is who) also the same case.. i really so scare.. i dun wan to lose my grandma.. i still wanna spend time with her.. i just can't stop crying.. a lot of pictures keep on flashing across my mind.. those time i spend with grandma.. i keep on blaming myself now.. why i cannot do anything to help her.. tat day.. i was holding her hand.. the very first time... in my life.. i hold her hand.. she really suffering.. i dun wan to believe it.. i dun wan to believe the story is true.. i dun wish it is true.. but if it is true?? what can i do?? all is not in my control... i very vexed..


i dun wanan find shawn.. coz.. in order not keep let both of us hurt more.. i chose not to find him.. is not tat i dun wan.. do u understand the meaning inside?? i kw u dun like the feeling of me putting my fren more important den u.. but they are the one always with me... the feeling... is not tat easy de do u kw??? just let me be alone... the more u like tat.. the more stress i got.. i already very vexed and stress enough... this month is my exam month.. and plus my grandma case... these 2 is already a big blow to me.. i already have enough stress... but ytd u still shout at me.. haiz.. who hurt more?? sometime.. a word sorry.. wun help to heal any scar de do u kw tat?? hurt is already being made.. nothing u can do to prevent it.. what u can do now is just leave me alone..


i am just weak.. i tot i always so strong.. but i am just weak... what can i do??? i am a burden to everyone... and i am the one tat giving xiong lot of stress... coz of mine thinking.. my ren xin.. my everything.. making him stress.. i kw.. i understand.. i know him very well.. even if he dun tell me.. i can feel it.. he cannot hide anything from me.. coz when something is wrong.. i kw.. and when something is wrong.. tat feeling.. will be here.. i dun kw why.. anything abt him.. i tend to understand a lot and very easily... and.. there will be one person.. jealous of this.. right Mr Shawn??? haiz... one day.. i dare to say.. u will say this out.. "i not like xiong.. he is so much better den me.. he can give u what i cannot give u.. den u go find him la.." bla bla bla.. things like this... i will dare to say... if u say this out.. i make sure i ignore u for 3 days.. i said it.. i mean it.. dun try to dare me.. i still remember... when in secondary school.. somehow xiong made me angry or something.. i ignore him for 1 week.. well.. i also ignore one person.. count count.. now abt 5-6 years le bah... 3 days?? small cake only..


hey people.. next friday... maybe i will not celebrate my birthday.. MAYBE... i will let u all know again...

thx to xiong... seem like he is the only one tat really know who is me.. he got the way to cool me down.. haiz.. if dun have xiong.. what will i become?? well.. i was abt to tears... haiz.. nvm... dun wanna talk abt it.. hurt has being made.... no point looking back at it...


it just not the right time.. i gonna fail my test tml.. haiz.. no mood to study at all.. i can see the end is here... haiz...


haiz..................................

i have a super nightmare... i really totally lost when i woke up this morning.. life is so dark.. well.. life is nothing but suffering on earth right?? haiz.. i dream.. my father and one guy... tat guy.. in the dream.. somehow i call him grandpa.. but i didn't see my grandma before.. tat why in the dream i dun really kw how the face look like.. in that dream... i lost both of them.. my kin.. in a day... they both dead.. one after another.. i really.. so lost... den somehow.. i can see their soul.. and... was like.. wanted to help them see the rest of the family members before the cow head horse face come.. the cow head forse face is the guard of hell.. T.T their duty is to take one person soul when they die.. den me?? i can see the soul.. and.. i wanted to bring my dad to see my mum.. before the guard come.. but.. is somehow.. the guard will find him.. den i gonna hide him... den i try carry him.. but.. super heavy.. i can't... den.. my grandpa said.. cannot let him touch the door.. but i try to bring him to my mum and make sure he never touch the door.. coz he quite big size.. tat why i try to be extra careful.. but.. he still touch it..


i dun really remember what happen.. but.. i was crying like dun kw what when i heard they die.. and was a double blow to me when i heard my dad die also... (CHOY CHOY CHOY!! TOUCH WOOD TOUCH WOOD) haiz.. den.. got one guy told me.. my grandpa.. share the body of my big brother.. den... my papa.. gone.. T.T i dun kw what to do.. den i woke up.. i really so scare.. but i dun dare to tell my mama..


i so scare.. nightmare and more nightmare.. when den will stop?? if is becoz of the 7th month tat why got nightmare.. den i have to suffer for 2 month... T.T i really so scare.. i dun kw what to do.. now my grandma in the hospital.. i so worry.. i dun kw what to do.. i very scare..

i really very very sad.. i cry on the spot just now.. but i try to keep it... wun allow others to see it.... i went to see my grandma at SGH just now.. i met up yiwen, my cousin, den we go together.. oh gosh... grandma really look so sick.. i understand.. she suffered a lot.. she really... haiz.. when she shouted in pain.. i really heartbreak.. she held my hand tightly... i really.. feel very bad... but i can't cry...


when she saw me.. she still say the old word.. u are getting taller and taller.. T.T my grandma is 85 years old this year.. i really... dun bare to see her like this.. she in pain.. T.T i love my grandma so much... this is the first time i hold her hand.. i try to do whatever i can... helping herwhen she eat her medicine.. helping her when she eat her food.. but she can't eat... when drink water.. cough cough cough.. cough the water out.. haiz.. when eat medicine also very difficult... T.T and her stomach.. bloated like siao man.. so big!!! i wonder!! what the hell the doctor is doing!! none of the doctor come over and take a look at her!!!! and the nurse!!! also take so long to come over and help her.. what the hell.. SGH!!! how can like this!!! not enough doctors and nurses??? haiz... so angry...


i hope my grandma get well soon... T.T