on the mirror in my bathroom i have a post it note with my goals for this year. i haven't done well at accomplishing them (so far) but i read them everyday. also when i'm going through a rough time i like to find a quote or mantra to write down so i can see it when i get ready and remember to tell myself my mantra throughout the day. examples of this have been:

"kill em with kindness"
"comparison is the thief of joy"
"i defeated my enemy when i made him my friend"

they've been helpful. today i came across an article titled, "how 5 post-it notes can make you happy, confident, and successful". take for what you will, but either way i think it's some good advice, at the very least, just to bring some positivity to your life. click here for the article.

what the heckkkkkkkk

ONE YEAR AGO was my life changing road trip. i can't believe it was a year ago and i wish i could do it again or do it next week or something. the past year has been a good one though. this summer is lacking the trips last year's had, but i suppose that's ok because i really need to save money. i struggle with finances, it's one of  my biggest vices. last night i made a commitment to myself to get my crap together and be serious about being smarter financially.

a lot of doors i prayed for to be open are presenting themselves to me and it's kind of stressing me out. now that they are opening, which path do i choose? hrmph

memorial day weekend was SO GOOD. i went to st george with some friends and just relaxed. one day i even slept in until 10 am and it felt AMAZING. we literally just lounged around and did whatever we wanted and it was so nice to just be. i don't just be very often.

this morning was rough and my room is a mess and my bed isn't made and i was ten minutes late to work and i'm so tired today but i'm also content so that's okay.

"Never have I seen so many young, privileged, people trying so hard to be happy. There are countless articles written about it, blogs named for it, workshops attending to it. Who ever said we’re supposed to be happy all the time, anyway? We’re not. And the pressure to do so might be what’s making us unhappy to begin with. It’s OK if you’re not completely content with your life twenty-four hours a day. Can you imagine what a boring person you’d be if you were? Going through shit storms, feeling uninspired, hating the way you look and having guilt over not accomplishing enough are just some of the things that make you interesting, relatable and human. Not to mention, if you’re reading this, then you have internet access and if you have internet access, it stands to reason that you have a computer, which makes me think you probably have a place to live, with electricity and plenty of food to eat and clean clothes to wear, which are all things that an enormous amount of people living on the planet today do not have. This is not to say that people shouldn't strive to better their positions in life, however it seems like so many of us are no longer content with a regular amount of happy, yet dead-set on being maniacally jubilant, all of the time."

-Kelly Rheel

because grandmas are the best

my cousin is getting married this weekend and it's a three day event and the best part about it is that i get to hang out with my grandma (what happens at grandma's stays at grandma's)

moms

first of all, moms. moms are the best. my mom has worked really hard to help me get where i'm at. she has sacrificed a lot and i'm sure it wasn't easy. i know i can rely on her to be a listening ear and she has bailed me out of sticky situations a million times. we haven't always seen eye to eye (teenage angst) but she's always had my back. also she is an awesome example of kindness. growing up i never heard my mom say one bad word about ANYONE...and there were times she definitely had reasons to. THANKS MOM for being the best mom i could ask for.

there are also a lot of other great women in my life. women who have definitely been placed there strategically to teach me things and love me and be my friend. i feel really blessed and lucky to have known all of the great ladies that i've encountered.

Elizabeth & the Catapult - Shoelaces

tuhday

today was an okay day. it was a day that felt like it lasted forever which is good and bad i suppose. i fell asleep at a friend's house last night and was super late to my meeting this morning...then i had church and stuff. then a church dinner, made some nasty bread, wrote in my journal, listened to a fireside, bike ride. i think the best part of the day was the bike ride i went on with my roommate. it felt good to get out and went to the neighborhoods by the lake and i love riding out to the lake because it's so beautiful and green and rural and there are horses and cows and donkeys and kids playing catch with their dads and families on bike rides. it was so hot yesterday and i wasn't ready for the heat so i ran away from it and stayed inside, which is not like me, but for some reason i couldn't handle how hot was. but the bike ride tonight was just what i needed and turned my crusty frown upside down.

the struggle is real

not much to say here. i've been working for a different doctor this week and next because dr. b is in hawaii for a few weeks and my co worker that works with dr. c (the one im subbing for) had knee surgery. i've been working more hours but honestly i like working for him more. my blood pressure is sooo good and normally throughout the work day i can feel it sky rocket and my blood boils at different points throughout the day...so needless to say it's a good change.

this morning i slept through my alarm and woke up out of the blue at 8 am (2.5 hours late but who cares), yesterday i had a phantom gall bladder attack because i ate raw broccoli (but yoga cleared it out), and my hair is falling out like nobody's business (just ask ljo--she saw it).

everyone keeps asking me what my plans are for the summer and i dont have any!! it's really weird considering all my trips last summer so i suppose i'll have to get something in the works.