Hi

It's been one and a half year since I updated my blog. A lot of things happened during that period of time which I probably could not remember most of it except for one or maybe two particular things that I would never forget. I am finally a graduate with a degree and now in the means of looking for a full time job and also entering the quarter life crisis. I've been so down lately and I've got no one to talk to, so maybe blogging would help although no one would probably read it. I really do not know what's been going on with me. My mood swings were horrible and I am always grumpy. Sometimes I even breakdown into tears. I am feeling the lack of love. I feel lonely although I have friends around. But it still feels like I do not have a life anymore. Am I going into depression?? Sighs.... someone help me...

Tandem Sky Dive 15,000 ft, Lake Wanaka, New Zealand

Yes. It's true. I did it. I jump off the plane 15,000ft above in the air. It was not planed but my parents asked if I want to do it. The answer was definitely a yes. I was not nervous at all but was totally excited about it. I was assigned to go with a tall and hot instructor, Jeff. He did what he needed to do to get us prepared before the jump. We did all the normal procedures, watching a video clip, signing forms, wearing proper gears and having a video/cameraman along. It all happened in a mere one hour. Started with walking to the plane and having a few photographs and a short chat with the instructor. There were three other people that were going to jump at 15,000ft, so a total of twelve people in the plane, four instructors, four camerame, four jumpers and a pilot of course. So we took off. We slowly got up, 2,000ft, 5,000ft, 10,000ft and finally 15,000ft. On the way up, we took pictures, videos, talked (instructors were doing all the talking, probably trying to calm the jumpers a little bit) and the scenery was marvelous. I was the third person to jump off the plane. The first person went off in seconds. It went so fast, I can barely see him. It was then my turn. I guess that is when I start to get nervous. Took another few pictures. Instructor told me to get ready, so hands on the strap, heads on his shoulder, hips forward and pooff... we are off in the air. It took me probably about 10 seconds to be aware that I am free falling. I was told earlier that if the instructor taps on my hand, I could let go of my strap and relax. He tapped me the first time but I was too into the free fall (or maybe nervous), second time and I was still on the strap, third time and I realise that I was suppose to let go and until the fourth time I released. My hands were flying, like a bird. I was not sure what to do that time but was just looking at the video camera that was in front of me and SMILE!!! All I did was smile. Looking back, I should have done something funny instead, just like what the instructor did. After 60 seconds of free falling, he opened the parachute. The cameraman left and landed first. The instructor then release some straps so that I would feel more comfortable. Took the plastic eye protector off and he asked if I was ok. My ears were blocked with the air pressure and it was hard to breathe during the free fall. He then told me to pinch my nose and blow through it to unblock my ears. It was not clear till I reach the ground. But I was not too concern about that at all. All I was thinking of is I SKY DIVED!!! I landed safely and was so hyper with the adrenalin rush in my blood. The cameraman was waiting on the landing ground and took more pictures. The whole jump probably took about 10 minutes, less maybe but I want to do it again!!! Dad was taking video of me landing. I was waving and smiling at the camera. I was surprised I was not shaking or walking side ways after landing. Smiling all the way, walking back to base. Took off the gears, waited for my Dvd and Cd, and got a t-shirt. Watched the video and I was totally looking weird in it as the pressure was pulling my cheeks upwards. It was ugly =( but it was all worth while, the money paid, the experience of a life time! So my dear friends, if you see me, remember to ask me for my sky dive video and pictures!! I do not mind you people laughing on how funny I look in it at all!

Cheers mate!!

August 2010

Time for another update just cause I am bored. Its semester break again. Time passes really fast this year. Unfortunately, nothing much was done last semester. Nothing but disappointment over and over again. This semester, I have decided not to care much anymore but make full use of my life. Although I have a busy semester with a big project to do and lots of assignment but weekends are off days for me for hanging out with friends. NO assignments, study, or anything related. Enough about that.
Birthday coming up soon. Planned a birthday party in Wellington with a couple of friends. Will be having my third quarterly LM workshop on that day itself too. Would be a tiring but fun day. Nothing much planned for the party, just hanging out and catching up with some friends and then to the clubs.

As for the whole two weeks break, couldn't go any where far as I still have combat classes to teach, so day trips will be the best. Probably going up to the mountain sometime next week and to Napier sometime this week.
And, for my summer break, parents will be coming over for a month and will be traveling down south island. After that, I would really want to go to Australia, depending on the availability of my friends. It seems that our plans will usually never work out somehow. You people know who you are. So I probably travel alone and that would be interesting!

Not sure when is the next update but most probably not too soon.
Cheers!

Update (Probably It's Time Now)

Yes! I know I've been lazy. Never 'free' to come scribble rubbish lately (about 2 months now).
Lots had happened the past 2 months - coming back and settling down in the new flat, visa problems, combat instructing, studies, Easter camp, blackwater rafting/Auckland trip and holidays.

Was really busy when I just got back to NZ. Started to unpack all the boxes, going here and there buying house necessities, furniture, groceries, etc. Took about 2 weeks to settle down and getting the internet going. It's really hard flatting out with a few friends. Hard as in changing the personal lifestyle into cooperating with flatmates. I've been so use to living alone that I don't need to follow schedules. I just do whatever I want and whenever. Flatting out means weekly cleaning, groceries, cooking, paying bills and having dinner together. I am not complaining here but thought it is a really good experience. I learn how to tolerate, help each other, take the bus to uni (but I still drive once in a while =) ), manage the flat's finances, save power (never use to off lights when I was staying on campus but now the flat is always very dark) and throw rubbish? LOL! But yes, flatting is awesome!!

Now, about my studies. Having a little trouble this semester. Taking three 300-level papers and one 200-level. All 300-level papers are core papers, that meaning I will need to pass all including the other one. I've been told that if I do not pass all of them, I will have problem getting my next visa which will due in July. This semester the immigration office only gave me 6 months visa because I did not do well last year. I am really worried about this. I do not want to go back not finishing my studies or rather I do not want to go back at all. Please pray that I will be able to stay here, meaning passing my papers. I believe that He will do what is best for me and I will promise to work hard.

After six weeks of uni, it is time for holiday!! Easter break! This year's Easter camp was awesome. The best I've ever been to. It was held in Riverdale, Masterton, about two hours south from Palmy. It was at a christian campsite. Easter camp used to be held in marae the past few years that I've attended but this year the leaders decided to do something different. The speaker was great. Although it was all basic information about what is easter and what God did for us, it saved seven people from the camp, including two close friends of mine. It was such a joyful day that I will never forget. It felt like the day I received Christ as my Savior. I was speechless and could not control my tears. It was tears of joy! God's present was so strong, so strong that I could feel it right there. Thank You.


Few days after camp, a couple of us went blackwater rafting at Waitomo Caves. It was the best ever adventure I've tried and NZD 198 was so worth paying. It was a three hour adventure, starting with abseiling and four other activities which I could not remembered what they were called. There were jumping off a cliff into the water (with a float of course), going through 'holes' and climbing up waterfalls. It was cold and tiring but all eight of us manage to come out safely. The next day was a trip to Auckland with Chris and ZY. The rest went to Taupo for fishing.

I stayed for four days with the initial plan to look for a new car and also going to the Les Mills Gym. The car hunting failed just because I did not want to miss the gym classes. I made the right decision going to Auckland. I was struggling as an instructor too because my numbers was the lowest among all other classes. It is definitely my method of teaching or maybe because I am Asian (whatever~). I was inspired by the experienced instructors in Auckland. They were the Master Instructors for Body Combat, Dan and Rach Cohen, DVD presenters and Module Instructors. Also, classes there are like 100 times better than where I am teaching now but I can't compare these two places. Being in their class showed me how to instruct better. I will never be like them but I can be myself. Each of us have our own individual method. Yesterday was my first class since I got back from Auckland. I tried new stuff in class, made the class fun, sang along a few songs (I can't sing) push the participants hard and also mixed the few best tracks. It was awesome!! I got great comments by the end of class. I am so glad and all I want to do is thank YOU!

The next few weeks will be crucial. I will need to focus a LOT on my studies and I will need the strength from God. Please pray for me that I will be able to concentrate, stop procrastinating, slacking and giving excuses. Pray that I get the wisdom of understanding in whatever I am studying. Thank you.
 

New Year 2010... belated

It's been..... 2 weeks now since I got back to Malaysia. Spending new year on the plane wasn't anything special at all and I guess I was either watching movies, sleeping or having dinner around that time. Landed safely at KLIA around 8-ish, collected my baggage and met my parents, after 10 months. Nothing change, still the same old mom that starts to nag the next day but maybe some changes from dad. He seems to be getting really forgetful and careless. Got back to the apartment and started to remove all the stuff I bought for home which includes 10x chocolates (all distributed), 2 bottles of wine, some spices, 4x honey. My baggage was overweight this time, for the first time. That's how heavy all these stuff were cause I did not bring back many clothes. Cleaned myself after that and straight onto my computer, checking mails and chatting, telling people that I am back in M'sia!!
Since I got back, I've manage to catch up with some friends (after 2 and half years), ate nasi lemak, curry mee, lam mee, char koay teow, tom yum and home cook food (soup every night + 2 dishes ... feels like... home). Yet to eat penang laksa, all sorts of kuih, cny cookies and many more. What I did not eat was INSTANT noodles!!! For a whole 2 weeks, which is a record. I will usually have at least one packet a week back in NZ. But what I did not like is I am gaining weight with all these food consumed and zero energy output. I manage to go for a BC class in Sunway when I went down to KL for the weekend and found out that my fitness went down the drain, and getting worst is its going to be flush away too! Its either I work out more often or cut down on the food, which is stupid since I will only have another month of yummy food! So that's only the other option. Found out that there's a new gym opening in Jusco called Fitness Embassy. This will be the first gym that will have a studio room and a cycling room in Ipoh. Can't wait until they have Les Mills classes so the next time I am back, I know where to go in Ipoh and don't need to go all the way to KL anymore.
Besides going to KL for weekends, I am practically at home 24/7, either sleeping or watching series or becoming a driver, fetching my friend that is staying in my place for 3 weeks. I did manage to go out for movies and yum cha's but that's' all. I guess I should enjoy my holiday now because some people I know are complaining how they dislike their working life from 8-5pm and no holidays, so I shall shut up. Can't wait till everyone comes back for CNY but that means it's time for me to leave. I will make sure I enjoy my time with all of you.
Oh ya, new year resolution! Totally forgotten about it. I know I usually make like a whole 10 list of my new year resolution every year but I think this year there's only going to be a few.

1. Pass all my exams and graduate by 2011.

2. Be a better Christian and serve God all the time.

3. Be thrifty.

4. Be a better friend to everyone and not so ignorant.

5. Be a better instructor.

6. Be a patient person.

This will be this year's resolution. Just realised that I had almost the same one last year but I did not manage to fulfil it. Did not manage to pass all my exams and graduate by 2010, did not save money and was not hardworking enough. But I manage to become fitter, got an instructor's job, did not hate anyone, and definitely made more friends. That's 7/10 done. Hopefully this year, with only 6 on the list, I will manage to follow it. Happy New Year 2010!

Summer Holiday

It's been slightly more than two weeks now since my last exam. Much have happened since the last post. Exams, exams and more exams. This year have been really hard for me but I am still holding on. Lets not talk about studies. It's summer man! I finally started instructing Body Combat and today was my second class. Last week's class was pretty good in numbers but I was still nervous and today was slightly better but less in numbers.
Went to Auckland last week on a last minute plan which worked out really good. Sometimes this type of spontaneous plans are so much better than plans that doesn't work out after long planning. Drove all night from 12am from Palmy and reach Auckland around 7ish am. Went shopping straight away then check in into backpackers. Parking is so expensive in Auckland so its wise not to drive there next time. Been driving around Auckland for the first time and feels like M'sia, with all the traffic jams and double lanes cause you wont get it elsewhere in NZ. Visited Kelly Tarlton's and Auckland Zoo with two of Hana's Japanese friends that came for a trip. We were like chickens and ducks trying to communicate cause their English wasn't good and of course I couldn't understand Japanese but what ever happens, just yelled HANA-chan! The trip was awesome with spending lots of money but still all good.
The next weekend went to Wellington for the last workshop of the year. This release is awesome! Can't wait to teach it. Loves the songs and the new moves. The next relauch will be awesome cause I can say I am improving as an instructor.
That's pretty much what have happened in the past two weeks after exam. Oh yeah, I move in into my friends place in town, so you might not see me online 24/7 anymore. And it's one more month till Christmas and till home! Really misses home, my family, relatives, friends, food, everything. Realise I haven been in much contact with my friends back home and hopefully we could catch up once I am back. =)

It's That Time Again!

Well, if you don't know what time is that, its exam time! Yes. I am afraid. I have lost my confidence after what had happened last semester. It's been a really bad year for me, especially last semester. This semester was pretty good so far but there's so much in my mind. I have not been doing well at all in my studies. It seems to get worst year by year. I remembered when I first came to NZ, I was pretty hardworking, studying at least few times a week and it went to once a week, and now, I can't be bothered. What have happened to me? What is God doing with me? What does He wants from me? Since I have decided to trust Him, I've tried to do everything I could to glorify Him. It's not easy and I know that. Never said it was at all and I am still struggling to. The used to be self-centered me is trying to be God-centered. I do my best to think about others before me although I do admit sometimes I still do not do what God wants me to do. I do not expect anything from them but I am waiting the promises from God.
I am still waiting and will wait till whenever He wants to fulfil those promises in me. I pray that He will continue to work in me and also the rest of the other OCFers. As exams are in a weeks' time, I will do my best to study and let the rest of the job for God. Whatever decision He makes for me, I will accept.
Please pray for me my fellow friends that are reading this. Thank you.