Dream

Today I had a weird dream during my afternoon nap... I dreamt of someone that never exist at least not in my memory. All I know that person is from RV (dunno why when she not even in uniform), she is in Xiu Wen cg if I am not wrong (in my dream) and I seems to know the person in fact 'she' had a name (Just that I could not remember now). Wow it is as if this person existed. The weird thing is that the rest of the people I dreamt at people from real life like our cg member and Xiu Wen CG members. I also dreamt of my and nhut having a huge house with 3 gates. My dreams have been getting some sorta weird and we had some gathering in the garden under one very big tree with golden color leaves. It have been so long that I remember my dreams. Things seems so real...

Revelation

Today while surfing facebook for some stuff, a very strong revelation struck me that it hurt me very much. I came to realize why had my dad acted in such a manner. Imagine you life you life for the past 20 years no social life at all. Work and go home from Monday to Saturday. Weekend Go to supermarket for groceries.

It is very monotonous and just simply a chore, a responsibility life. I sorta see it reflected in my life. For so many years I just spend my free time at home as I hated my mum kept asking where I am going and stuff. Then she will be giving all sorts of comment if I am going out too frequent with my friends.

For my entire primary school day I did not when for any outing organized by my classmates. I go straight home after school. Can only leave home like just enough time to go to school. For secondary school days, not once went out with my sec 1 and 2 classmates. The time I wanted to go ended up in disappointment as my mum wanted me to go somewhere else instead. Even till later part of school life it is quite the same. The only change is that once a while did manage to meet up with friends. Even till JC's days it is still quite monotonous during my weekend. All I do is just stay at home and follow my parents if they are going anywhere.

Really tired of living a life so monotonous, no color at all. Maybe that is what made me to the extend of emotionally shut down. I felt no love in my family, everything I live for is just for is responsibility. Nothing of it is truly my life, no excitement, no desire, NOTHING at all.

~A 20 yrs old living a 50 yrs old life...~

Beatiful Things Around Us

How often will you stop to enjoy the beautiful things around our life? Is our pace of life so hectic that we often ignore everything that is happening around in our life? Being one of the fast pace society, we have lost the ability to enjoy little things.

Everything we seek is speed, effectiveness, short cut and often we for get that sometime things needs patience just like Rome was never built in one day. As we enter a world that talks about speed and effectiveness, just hope that we remember that things that we truly desire needs time to give it the meaning e.g success in career, relationship with your love ones,passion for God etc are things that there is no short cut in it.

Seeing now people are going for speed dates and stuff, hoping to find a life partner within few hour or make a true friend in just one session of talk, becoming millionaire overnight these does not make any sense to me. Sad to say if that is how we want our life to be, lots of things would have lost its meaning. These things will not be cherish as time is not being factor into it anymore.

Sometime we can stop to enjoy things that are so peaceful, slow and relaxing. You will see many beautiful things that you never ever notice before. It can range from some random event to someone that is truly friend to you.

~Sometime learn to look around us, at least it is something you can reach.~

Giving of our time

If we can give 2 years of my time to our country, 15 years to pursue an education, half a lifetime to pursue a career, can we give our lifetime to God for his glory?

~The time on Earth is given to us by You O Lord, lets use it for your Glory!~

Hatred

Hatred is a very special/weird feelings. It is a weird emotion to have. If you truly hate somebody else, the person must have brought you a lot of pain. Yet why do we want to hold on this pain by trying so hard to get back on the person. We are paying so much attention to the ones we hate sometime even more than those who we love. Some people can sacrifice their love ones just to get their 'sweet' revenge.

Sometime I wonder can you hate someone so deeply without any love involved. I believe only one that you very love can hurt you that much as those who you do not have any feeling with will not affect you for whatever they do. They just cannot hurt you much as they have no access to the anger button of yours. Yet it is the one you love that cause you that much hurt and hatred.

If you love someone and you keep thinking of that someone is understandable as you enjoy the feeling but hatred is an entirely emotion yet we do so for? We are ultimately punishing ourselves for the wrong others have done to us. Yet often than not we cannot see this fact. Often we get trap in this vicious cycle and we are on the losing end.

They will benefit as they will see us suffer for whatever wrong they have done to us. This will further fuel they joy.

So the best way to treat them is to forgive them, forget about the wrong they have done to us. So they can have nothing against us. Forgiving is not the easy way. Spread the love to your enemies. Astound them with your forgiveness and great heart.

~Can Hatred exist without Love?~