April memories

Did I never post photos from Easter? The 3-day weekend together was glorious. It still cheers me up to remember it...on cold, sniffly, sore throat mornings like this one. It wasn't really all that long ago...

 A picnic in a quiet little park on Good Friday. Annika rips up the grass

 Look what I got Mummy! 

Easter Sunday with family

        Chocolate egg hunt.... Sophie made me so proud, helping the littler kids find more eggs...sharing some of hers with them...

And since then, the last time we've had three days home together, even two days...has been with the flus and the colds and the coughs.Annika recovered first, thankfully, which means we're all sleeping much better now. Still, I cannot even find words for how much I am looking forward to:

a) a completely flu-free family

b) the holidays

c) my sister Brittany coming to visit. on the holidays. when nobody will be sick :)

To Loren

May 3, 2011 - the one year anniversary of the loss of my beautiful sister. 

 Loren, I miss you dear sister. I miss your friendship, your compassion, the wisdom and gentleness you carried, even in your youth. I try to be that kind of friend, that kind of listener, like you were to me and  others.
I am thankful that your light and the bright memory of your beautiful smile are still with us. That you are knowing peace and joy in a full way, such as we have not yet known - I am thankful fro that.

I am thankful for your 2 delightful and amazing children. I have many dreams and hopes about buidling memories with your boys as they grow, and that they can grow up knowing my girls too.

I still miss you, and often when I do I write your stories. I write down my memories of you - beautiful memories that make me smile. Memories of your childhood, your motherhood, our friendship as grownups, our big family joys and sibling stories...They are collecting here, in a beautifully bound journal. (It has a soft cloth binding in an earthy beige color, with a subtle white flower design, a wooden button, and very cute little Japanese doll for a bookmark- I think you'd like it! ) You will never be forgotten.

You will continue to be loved, and to inspire love.

"May the road rise up to meet you, may the wind be always at your back...

and until we meet again, my friend, until we meet again

May God Hold You in the Palm of His Hand"

Her imagination

I've heard it's not uncommon for 3 and 4-year-old girls to have imaginary friends. My Sophia always has many imaginary friends, students, children, animals...depending on who she is pretending to be at the time. This week, she has an imaginary husband. and they have 5 children. Apparently his name is Jared, and they live at number 1 Paint street. The story has been building all week. They have dramas, they have excitement, They have emotions and solve problem. Sophie makes them all dinner and teaches them things. Today's episode went something like this:

"Hi there, yes, we should catch up sometime. But right now I have to dance and spin. I can't run or jump or walk, just spin. And I have to teach my students to do ballet dancing. But I only teach them on Sundays. Sundays and Thursdays and Wednesdays, that's when I teach them. But I have to go back in time, to my husband, he's at the hairdresser's, with all the kids. I have to go back there in time so I can see Jared and my kids, cause they're just waiting for me, and they miss me. But next week we're going to ABC street - that's not too far from you're house! So we should catch up again sometime!"

Those are just a few of the bits I can remember. She's still going on... she makes me smile.

And last week, Dan and I are sitting on the couch one evening. We have some of Sophie's favourite music on for her, and she's dancing. We watch with delight (and maybe with just  a few snickers). She spins, she kicks, she does fancy footwork, she wiggles her hips! We are as impressed as parents of a happy, creative 3-and-a-half-year-old should be. I ask her, "Sophie, where do you get all your good ideas for dances? Have you seen some of those dance moves on tv, or at school (daycare)?" She stands still, with one hand on her hip, and the other raised with a pointed finger. Her brow furrows. She has her Take-Me-Seriously face on. "Well," She says, "Jesus gives me dancing. He just sends me dances, because he knows I like dancing, and he likes me SOOO much...he just keeps sending me more dances, and then I dance for Jesus, and it makes me happy!"


So, my heart's desier...one of them: that my children would grow up curious, confident, happy, kind, healthy. Able to accept and recognise healthy love, and able to give it. Eager to create and learn and always wondering, asking questions, thinking what if. I get glimpses of some of those things, setting themselves up in her even now. Those moments are my greatest joys.
She says to me "Mama, I've decided, when I grow up, I don't want to live in America. Cause I don't want to live far away from you and Daddy. I'll miss you when I don't live in your house anymore. But I'll have my own house, and I won't be too far away, and will you come to my wedding?" We daydream together...about how I will definately be there if she has a wedding...and if she has a baby...and how we'll go to movies together and go shopping for shoes together and we'll have cups of tea, and how I'll babysit her kids so she can go on a date with her husband. And she makes me smile.

How easily my daughters can make my heart sing, and ache, all in the same day, in the same moment. Be strong and brave and curious and lovely my daughter. Be safe and careful and healthy and close. And don't grow up too terribly fast.

A Furry Intruder

It was Saturday morning. It seemed like a normal enough, lovely weekend day to me. Dan had left very early for a short morning flight, and I looked forward to taking him out for his birthday later in the afternoon. The girls and I had breakky at the table... nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

It wasn't until Dan got home at about 10am, that I found out there had been a noisy, theiving creature clambouring about our kitchen in the night!
The conversation went something like this:
A: Did you sleep well last night? Did you wake up both times Annika woke up? (Yes, I often ask my husband too many questions to answer at once. It's not meant to be an interrogation. It's more of a - choose your own conversation starter!)
D: Yeah, alright. No, Annika didn't wake me up. But the possum did.
A: what, on the roof?
D: No, in our kitchen! Bangin' around... didn't  you hear it?

I did not.

The moral of the story is, Dad sleeps through baby crying, but is out of bed and on his sleepy feet the moment there's a sound like someone (or something) who doesn't belong in the house. While Mum hears every noise the baby makes, but sleeps desperately through everything else! It's as if my subconscious shouts at me: If we don't have to feed it, it's not worth waking up for!

Apparently, someone had left the laundry window open while the dryer was running , and at that blissful moment of bedtime, had forgotten to shut said window. Thus the window was a doorway through the laundry and into our kitchen, for small and hungry beasts.

It was stealthy, I'll give it that. It took an apple. Nothing else on the table was out of place - and there was a lot, in piles, on the table! There were a lot of apples in the fruit bowl. The little critter couldn't be bothered with the banana or the avocado - too much work! No claw marks in anything else either, just knew exactly what it wanted and sat there in the bowl munching on it. Until Dan came along and chased it away, with the rest of its unfinished treat clenched firmly in teeth. Back out the window.
I laughed :)
Yes, we are much more careful now (again!) to check every window is closed before sleeping.

And on a completely different note - the rest of the day was wonderful. yes, we enjoyed the planetarium very much - nerds that we are! Dan loved it, and though I'm not a very smart nerd when it comes to science, I thouroughly enjoy being awed and amazed by the wonders of our universe, and being made just a little bit dizzy thinking about all the things I don't understand. But most of all, it was just wonderful to be on a date- hand in hand, chatting and whispering and laughing....just like the young kids in love we were 10 years ago...only completely different.