I don't always know how to start when I sit down to write and I often feel like I am saying the same things over and over, but I am just so dang grateful for this life and the people God has brought into our path at every stage. When Alex was little I used to tell him not to focus on the suffering or the pain or the things he couldn't do but look at the amazing people who we wouldn't have met without medical needs and illness.
This week felt very much like that. This week felt really special to me. I am not quite sure why it felt different but it just did. I am incredibly proud of both of my kids. They live a life most cannot even fathom. Their bodies betray them at every step. Their organs don't function, they live with extreme fatigue and they deal with chronic pain. They have to plan their schedules around medical treatments, medications and figure out how to still accomplish their goals and enjoy their lives. It is a task most adults would fail at, but you would be hard pressed to find either one of them backing down from a dream or complaining. They just use grit and determination and do the best they can while managing the consequences of living the life they choose. Because let me be clear they pay a price physically for every goal accomplished and every dream chased.
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| Newman has been such a great partner for Maddy |
This was our second year to attend Dixie National and everyone has talked about how much they enjoy this show. Last year we attended and it was good, but nothing special, but to be fair Mandy was really sick. So we were hoping this year to see what all the fuss was about and it didn't disappoint. Maddy loves horses and riding and she had a great show, but my goals for Maddy go so far beyond how to be an accomplished equestrian. I am always hoping Maddy learns kindness, to be a good teammate, to become more confident and independent, to make friends and be a good sport whether she wins or loses. This week I saw so much of this achieved in just a few short days.
We arrived in Jackson on Sunday and had dinner with some teammates. Monday was a practice day with a team lunch and dinner out again with friends. And then we showed Tuesday and Wednesday. Monday's practice was a little bit of a rough start to the week. We couldn't find Maddy's English saddle anywhere. So many people looked and it was just nowhere to be found. So she was in a bigger saddle then she was used to. Newman also was really "spicy" meaning he had too much energy. Maddy was in tears. Show dad Wade was able to find the right saddle and Mandy and Maddy tried again, but wound up just walking the pattern they needed to review. After lunch was bubble bath time for the ponies and Maddy and her barn bestie washed Newman together. If you have never seen two girls give an animal a bath it involves lots of drawing hearts and putting handprints on your horse and lots of laughter!
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When Mad was struggling during practice her boy helped her feel better
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Tuesday was show day number one. On the schedule was horsemanship, trail and reining (a new class for Maddy). If you know anything about Maddy three western classes is not her cup of tea. Horsemanship was first and Newman was still a little spicy. Definitely not their best but they finished with a sixth place ribbon. Mandy and Maddy had a conversation and Mandy agreed to lunge Newman again if Maddy promised to do her part and make some corrections to help them both be better. They had trail after lunch and had an amazing pattern. Maddy finished second overall, but had two judges place her first. One of the barns we were competing against is always our toughest competition as they have VERY expensive, nice horses, so a second place finish was huge! This was one of our first breakthroughs as the riders waited for awards. Every time I looked over Maddy was motioning me to come down and stand with her. I chose to look away and I watched her stand with her 4 teammates chatting and laughing and having fun. After trail the rest of her teammates were done for the day, but Maddy had reining. She had only practiced the pattern once and it truly was just for fun. Maddy and Newman went in like they knew what they were doing and walked out as Champions. Maddy said it was so fun and told Mandy she would do reining again anytime. Everyone of our barn family know that English and Showmanship are Maddy's thing and she dreads western. They all gave her a hard time and told her she better start liking western after a day like that!
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| Horsemanship |
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| Reining |
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| Dyann and Maddy |
She was SO excited for Wednesday because it was her three favorite classes. She needed to make a decision about a fourth class which was at the beginning of the day. She discussed the pros and cons with me and then also had a discussion with Mandy and ultimately decided to sit it out. Next was Showmanship which has been her best, most consistent class for a while. She was once again Champion. She finished out the day with her two English classes. The first one was not their best by a long shot. Once again both Maddy and Newmie needed to make some changes. Mandy took some time to work with her before her last class and it made all the difference. Maddy was the last to go and she rode a beautiful pattern. She finished second, but honestly couldn't have done much different. So much learned and such a good show for this new team. I am so excited to watch this team grow as they continue to build their partnership.
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| Ready for showmanship |
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| Show dad Wade with his two girls |
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| Scratches for a job well done |
So why was this show special. For Maddy and I our favorite times at shows are sharing downtime and meals with our friends and teammates and this show allows for quite a bit of that. The friendships that form and the camaraderie are so sweet. There is so much laughter, so much joking around, and so much fun. It is truly magical to watch this team and the way they encourage each other. They cheer each other on, they celebrate each person's accomplishments and they console each other when things don't go the way they hope. They are the epitome of a team and demonstrate what sportsmanship should look like. They are competitors, but teammates first and foremost. So much of that comes from Mandy. She is not only an amazing coach, but what matters most to her is the hearts of her riders and that their time with Stable Strides is a safe social space where they are loved and accepted for exactly they are. One of my favorite moments from this show was after showmanship. At this show when they are giving awards they announce each judges placements and then call out the composite, overall awards. When they started calling the first judges card, one of Maddy's teammates was in first ahead of her. The other three judges had her first so she won the overall Showmanship award. When she got to the stands, she said, "Mom, I really wanted Forrest to win". I was so proud of her. I love her heart for her friends and that she cares enough about her teammates that she wants them to do well even if it means she won't win. One of my other favorite memories is from the end of yesterday. As Maddy was finishing equitation and they were calling awards, her teammates who show in the division above her were lining up for their class. As they called Maddy as the Reserve Champion, her friends all cheered for her. But all of that is pretty typical for the Stable Strides Family. They are know for their kindness and sportsmanship. And that isn't just for their team. The horse world is small and the Equestrians with Disabilities Horse community even smaller. These riders compete around the country in shows all year and we compete against the same competitors all the time. It is so cool to watch these athletes form friendships and root for one another and congratulate one another. They are fierce competitors, but also good friends. We could all learn from them.
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| So much laughter |
But beyond the show and placings, I saw so much growth in Maddy this show. Maddy has loved Mandy almost from day one and Maddy trusts her more importantly. Maddy knows that Mandy expects certain things of her as a rider, but even more so that Mandy will always be kind and encouraging even while giving corrections. For a little girl whose entrance into the horse world didn't always come with a soft landing, knowing your coach cares about you and won't yell at you makes a huge difference. Maddy was so unsure about what to do about the halter class. I watched her discussion with Mandy where Mandy laid out all of the possibilities and gave her the space to make the best choice for herself. In the past Maddy would have just done it even if she didn't want to because she hates to make decisions and even more so hates to disappoint anyone. Maddy took the time she needed and then let Mandy know that she had decided not to show in that class. The maturity she showed and the confidence to do what was right for her was something I have been hoping to see. Mandy has such a gift for truly seeing her riders and their hearts and always knows the best way to coach each individual. As a mom, it is means everything to see Maddy learning skills that she will use in her life that have nothing to do with riding, but that are learned doing what she loves. Mandy's approach and her kindness create a trust that isn't always easy for Maddy. I love watching them work together and see that relationship continue to grow where Maddy is held accountable but in a way that is never harsh or makes her feel bad about herself.
These friends, these days, these memories are truly treasured and leave us excited for our next adventure.
Ali
