Bliss~

www.ajollyhaven.blogspot.com

Have been great so far!

Busy working, meeting new people, catching up with friends n loved ones, chilling, enjoying sports, learning new hobby, adventuring to new places, finding new food places to enjoy, watching the rain the sky the flowers, appreciating little details of everything, singing my lungs out.....

Anyway,

Im not blogging anymore!

Maybe i....
1) have grown out if it
2) have nothing specific to blog about
3) wanna be joyful yet in a private manner

This space is officially... ABANDONED.

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 12:06 am

This is an email forwarded to me. For sharing...

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50%, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Miss. Right! If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love"; I believe this is the number one mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound "not politically correct", there's a profound truth here.
Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: "You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone"; You need a lot more!

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

Question - 1: Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose.

Two things can happen in a marriage: 1. You can grow together, or 2. You can grow apart… 50% of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life! Bottom line - Marry someone who wants the same thing.

Question - 2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?

This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get "punished"; or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings… Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

Question - 3: Is he/she a mensch?

A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right ";. So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world - 1. People who are dedicated to personal growth and 2. People who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

Question - 4: How does he/she treat other people?

The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as waiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc.. How do they treat their parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything; can you do nearly as much for them? You can be sure that someone, who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

Question - 5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?

Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve"; them after they're married. As a colleague of mine puts it: "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage for the worse" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself trouble because you didn't do your homework.

Another Perspective - There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you.

Pay Attention - ‧ Which ones lift and which ones lean? ‧ Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? ‧ Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? ‧ When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse? ‧ Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you? The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you…the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye"; Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important. ‧ Do you bring out the best in each other? ‧ Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control? ‧ What do you bring to the relationship? ‧ Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? ‧ You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS -

1. Trust 2. Communication 3. Intimacy 4. A Sense of Humor 5. Sharing Tasks 6. Some get away time without Business or Children. 7. Daily Exchanges (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes, etc.) 8. Sharing Common Goals & Interests. 9. Giving each other space to grow without feeling Insecure. 10. Giving each other a sense of Belonging & Assurances of Commitment.

Keep these in mind when you feel that you have found the right person.. and verify if these points validate.. Good Luck.. !

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 11:10 am

Havent been sleeping well for 2 nights.
Heart and head in a total mess.
Eyes puffy, even tonnes of cold eye mask dosent help.
I look like a modern zombie.

I wished i can do something.
Flashbacks are terribly overwhelming.
I trying my best to control my mind from thinking.
The emotional struggles are back big time.
And i thought it has went away,
but it was just hidden beneath.

Ng shuning stop dwelling!
Walk on!!

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 10:37 am

Thank you for the note you have written for me.
It was a lovely surprise,
Yet sad at the same time.
Tough on you, i know...
And i wished i can do something for you.
Touched is the word after reading,
Am glad we appreciated each other,
And have loved each other so much.
I must admit i was very affected after reading,
Reading, and re-reading.
I teared again and again.
Memories flooded back,
Flashbacks of happy n bad times.
Like what u said, we went through practically everything.
Everywhere i go, im reminded of you.
Jokes we cracked, food we ate, places we visited,
Our anniversaries, birthdays, festivals,
The families, e picnics n cyclings,
Our languages, our soft toy,
The terms of endearment etc.
And of course the upsetting stuff.

Although i felt very sad when i read the note,
I somehow felt relieved tt u have expressed what u need to,
Instead if bogging them inside like u always do.
I have gotten your message,
And i will rmbr them deeply.
Felt touched n sweet, yet sad.
But this can only be it.
Cos i know we have to stay firm with the decision we made,
Cos we know we will not be happy together,
N nothing will change after marriage.
I sincerely hope after reading this,
You wont come back here again.
Come back only when u feel u r ready n moved on,
If not i will be sad to see/hear u so down.
U will, and always will be in a corner of my heart and mind too.
My greatest hope is to see you happy & healthy,
And only when u have moved on,
We can always meet up for some catch up.
Be happy,
Go out with friends n families who love u so much,
Go out an hv fun.
Sing, mahjong, exercise, read, rear ur fav fishes,
Eat good food, play soccer, cheer out loud! :)

The previous entries are my heartfelt thanks and feelings for you.
Hope u will rmbr, and although u need to move on,
Dont forget me.

Be good, dont reply anymore.
Look forward, stay joyful and healthy.
Hearts.

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 6:55 pm

I went to the doc anyway regarding the intensive headache. In the end it's sinus infection, not migraine. Crazy... Was given some med now fully recovered! Like finally. I can focus on work n give my full attention to my clients.

This friday night will be an Award cum Gala Night. It's an evening to appreciate Excel Club qualifiers for 2010's well-done sales production. Glad i have done pretty good, esp towards the year end where i closed ultra big cases. Really appreciate those clients who put their trust and dollars with me. ( 特别是你，想要好好谢谢你去年的鼓励和不断地为我找referrals和自己support me，我会更加努力做得更好，不会让你失望的！希望你也努力工作，幸福快乐！）

Bought a grecian-looking maxi dress for Gala Night. Looking so forward to wearing that for a 美美 night and the great feast at Ritz Carlton :)

另外：
心情偶尔会歪歪的。
还是会很想你。
看到你在fb的updates,
一方面会有很多美丽的回忆浮现，
但另外一面又为你开心you have moved on.
只希望你会找到属于你的幸福，
开心，健康，工作顺利。
谢谢你的一切 :)

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 2:02 pm

Been having this super bad headache since sunday.
The pain is so throbbingly intense on sunday,
pain on the back of my head, temply, cheek and back of neck.
Terrible!
I seldom get headache, but if i get it'll be this terrible.
But it has been months since i last have this.
This time around it's here for 3 days... :(
Sunday. Yesterday. And today also.
Totally can't focus on anything and can't get any work done.
A colleague who was an ex-nurse told me this could be migraine cos she is suffering from that too.
Symptoms sama-sama.

I hope it's migraine and not anything worse.
Ouch....

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 12:53 pm

Why do i always put on weight on my face first?
My face is so 肉肉 til i dont even want to look at e newly tagged photos.
Fats dangling frm my arms.
Feels like 三层肉 now.
What did i feed myself...?
Puzzled.

Anyway i feel much better after coming back frm a long-time-didnt-run-but-force-myself run.
A whopping 35 mins of run.
Came back feeling lighter. ;)

I hv always loved CNY. No exception this yr :)
Had a great time.
Felt so loved among my fam, relatives n frens.
Loved all my new dresses i clicked online. <3
And great feast (not again...)

Happy CNY!

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 9:55 am

Regret totally that i didnt went for our retreat back in 2010 to Pataya in Thailand.
This time around i felt it has made up for it 'cause it was totally enjoyable to the max! I have heard people talking about Sunway Lagoon since i was young and i never had the chance to visit there. It's not a fantastic place. It's like a much bigger version of genting. It's more like the company i have that makes this entire trip a great one. :)
I didnt know they have such a big shopping mall. Had a crazy time shopping 'cause after walking for hours, we managed to complete just one level -_-'. That night we went MOS til 2 plus in the morning. Great experience. The next morning was really challenging. Didnt have enough sleep, and we got to complete the Sunway Challenge in such a huge theme park. Did the Flying Fox and it seemed to be 10 storey high. Alot of running here and there and checking out the clues. Vomitted my lunch n eventually dinner after the 360degree viking :(
The preparation for our "Talent Night - Music Arena" was hell of fun! The usual professionally dressed bunch of us were cladded in cowboy, in the 70s, in flowery stuff and most interestingly man-turned-women. Had a night of great food and entertainment. Ended the last night there with card games with a bunch of peeps in hotel room til 4.30am...
Fun trip! Love it!

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 12:21 pm

新的一年，新的开始。
2010年有许多起起落落，
尤其是后半年。。。。

为了让彼此变得更充实和快乐，
为了让彼此的未来更灿烂美丽，
再怎样放不下，再怎样舍不得，
曾经在一起漂亮动人的故事与画面，
是时候让它落幕了。。。

经过了许许多多，
人也成长了很多，
也变得更了解自己。
懂得自己喜欢什么，害怕什么。
懂得自己擅长什么，该学什么。
懂得自己哪里做错，哪里失败。
也了解了该怎么好好的走好我未来的路。

刚过的圣诞，
虽然有家人很朋友的陪伴，
但内心却是空空的。
接下来的新年，
情人节，生日，
还有大大小小的节日，
我们得要打起精神，
告诉自己在佳节时，
除了享受情人的爱，
我们也不要忽略家人朋友对我们的爱与关怀。

曾经拼命爱过，
曾经努力过。
因为有你，
我过去的几年，
过得很精彩缤纷。
谢谢你给的一切，
希望我们的决定是对的。
希望我们未来会更有憧憬。

新的一年，
真的要重新开始了。
放下过去，
为未来而努力。
但请记得，
我的生命里永远会有你的身影，
所以千万不要把我忘了。

谢谢你，
我爱你。。。

♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 1:05 pm

Audrey Ng.

Need advice or have queries on Wealth Accumulation and Life Protection??

Drop me an email me at audrey.ng@manulife.com.sg

Click here! --> Manulife Financial

To do.

~~Put Braces on 28th Sept '09~~
~~Learn driving Dec 2009~~
~~Get driving license by 2010~~
~~Shanghai Convention~~
Vienna Convention 2011

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