am doin this favour for a fren. She's apparently clearing out her wardrobe by auctioning clothes yea so if u want, go check it out and the details for payment are all available in her blog. ONLY 3 days left yea. Wells its all girls stuff so guys unless u wanna cross dress, do not go there. here's the webbie, www.michellified-.blogspot.com so yea just go there and check it out.
the uncontactable MIA Mr Helmi, hahas this is a birhtday shout out to ya!
Blessed Birthday to ya!
Finally ur getting younger? hahas and cya ard!
its funny dat i'd write abt you today. BUt you running away for almost 2 days is indeed worryin. BUt worse of all is knowing tat its over btw you and dat gal. Gosh, you knew it'd be coming and yet you still followed along. I hoped as well dat somethin would change, but i guess you gotta live in order to learn. my greatest regret was not being able to be there for ya. and oh wells i guess reality has gotten to ya. 2 days you've been probably wanderin in the streets at a loss of wat to do.
its funny tat our end of years are almost the same. yet it seems both of us will be headin down that gutter. after ur disaster i wonder how'll you'll ever pick urself up. but oh wells i guess u gotta come back home somehow. coz after all who'll take u in like we do. forgive mom and dad if they become angry at you or scold you for no better reason but i guess that's their only way of reachin to ya. somehow i bet u'd be wondering wats there to do now tat a force has left u. dun hold on to her. she's not worth the pain u'll go through. although she's nice, pretty as u'd say, but reli how much has she done for ya? and now its over, u think she'll gladly welcome u back? come home boy. she's gotta learn i guess as much as u gotta learn as well.
i'm no wiseman, coz if i was wise i wouldn't be in this mess i got myself into...
they say its the end...and i am acknowledging my end. its a waste...yes it is...but oh wells just like u i wonder how i can get goin. the temporal happines all this things give me just makes me wonder abt eternity.
just like u i guess i m weak. not as strong as before. but oh wells i guess there's no turnin back rite?
we were warned abt such things, yet we didn't heed it.
at this hr we try to distract ourselves frm such things...
you ran and i'm running
to a destination unknown
down to tat cellar door
away from the world around
but i keep dat door open
in hope someone would find me
i pray you do kp urs open
coz someone is tryin to call u
how long can u run
how far can u go...
who'd take u in?
dat serpent of a fren has left
and dun expect her to return
even if she does is it worth the pain?
its not over unless you say it is...
everybody hurts,
everybody cries...
sometimes
don't let yourself go...
for this is just another lesson in life
come back dude...
hold on dude...hahas coz i guess i m holdin on to somethin i quite dun understand yet... i've gone through life knowing tat i havent reli lived life... but tats life...
been abt 2 wks now since i've been holding back wat i've been thinking and worrying abt. along the way i realised that my concerns are real and not some misthought misunderstood stuff. and i guess i reli don't wanna spell it all out here coz yea ppl being ppl may not see wat i see. just like wats goin on. sometimes i raise qns and wonder why at a place whr we all are suppose to be one, its not the outside world dat splits us up or brings us down. but rather its the inside ppl who break and shake up the foundation tat was laid. anyway here's somethin i've been incubating for some time.
One day a wk to a sanctuary we seek
whr everyone looks at you and weighs you
according to your looks your mannerism
what you do, who ur with
it may appear as concern
but is it reli genuine?
i may be cynical
but prolly its just cyclical
whr we just throw away responsibility
embrace just activities
and say we can do this
on our own?
all alone?
with God?
and yet we think wats right is right
as long as it feels right
so i'm wondering wats right
if all this doesnt seem right
anyways just a sudden outburst intended long ago. Sunday sch lessons been on hypocrisy and how ppl view christians. Kinda saddening though to see how things reli are turning up. Just throw them in even if we are not in the same mind. It feels stifling when you voice your concerns and yet realise its somethin dats not reli something we wanna take a hold of.
but anyways somehow someone reminded me that yea not to worry. Prolly this is the last time b4 i go off to some place whr my needs are reli met. Whr there is someone who reli looks out for his sheep. Coz reli somehow i just feel dat its abt time i go. BUt its kinda rash to say that now. AM in a period of questioning and wrestling rite now. Am in a state whr honestly I'm unsure whr this life is taking me. Whr nothing seems certain. Even i dun even noe wats this all abt. I'm practically feeling like i'm a lost cause....
hais....
shall just stop now...
sometimes i wonder if its me dats blind...
dun get me wrong...i'm just praying i get some peace...prolly i just gotta believe...
i told my econs tutor tat i got no confidence in answering a particular qn. and she says hv more confidence. you can do it. sometimes its rare to hear someone tell you u can when u hv this feeling u cant.
courage. this mth is reli one of courage i guess. one whr i had to hold it all together. keep a straight face. kp tat smile. kp dat facade high up. but wats there to hide. you can see right through me rite? u noe me more than i noe anything at all...
hai i dunnoe wat i m sayin alr. i noe wats buggin. its tuggin. yet i'm not acknowledgin it. i ask myself is this reli the day i fall. is this reli the yr whr i no i've reached the sky and hit the bottom of the ocean and never go back up but be weighed down by the crushing force of water?
gosh...and i exclaim again. time moves so fast.
hope for the hopeless. believe is all i can? but i hv to do somethin dont i?
oh manz been abt a wk now since i've been locked out of my own blog. APparently was detected for spamming the net with stuff tat may cause the net to be inefficient...geez anyway see wat it does. now got reli nothin else to say except tat its gonna be 40 plus days of just muggin...dats my job for now. aside frm all dat reli got nothin tosay. hahas just happy dat this blog can run.
