haha the mv is really crappy tho.. =x

it's official! =)

ahh, haha much as i thought i dont wanna tell anybody, i actually wanna tell the whole wide world. so here i am on the world wide web.. blogging about it! =X

it's official! :D

and 7 more days till end of exams, omg study nik! bleahhh >.<

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

fear kills.

its the fear of the question even before digesting the question that kills me. =.= argh, most of the time i am pretty sure i KNOW how to do it.

fear kills. and i'm such a scaredy cat. meow~ >.<

ah, i can i can i can i can i can i can! I CAN DO IT! OK! just do your best and no regrets. no panikki.
i mean, afterall, there's not much pressure to do well i guess?
i mean, just do your best.
whatever will be will be.

http://www.biostat.wisc.edu/~kbroman/topten_worstgraphs/

i'm freaking out, pretty badly. T-T =(

I'm the princess of procrastination.. because i can procrastinate everything except procrastinating procrastination itself. xD

so probably i should strive to be the queen of procrastination. cos probably at that stage, it means that u have gain some enlightenment and will be able to procrastinate the toughest level of it itself.

haha ok, i'm crapping again. finee.

ahhhh, should totally get myself to school now. omg. =.= i'm slacking! haha crap. >.< nggaah.

and i realised, you can speak more than 900 words in 15 mins! coool~

differences

Was reading one of my lecture notes today and got reminded of a pretty interesting point. How the mere introduction of a new product(in hopes of alleviating some social issues) would end up leading to greater and more serious problems if it wasn't thoroughly thought through.

The lecturer was like saying about how invention of milk powder is a rather good thing for because it is so convenient blah blah blah, yet it is kind of immoral to actually try to promote the sale of milk powder in developing countries.. because in developing countries, they hardly have any clean water to begin with.. so mixing milk powder with dirty water would end up harming the babies instead!

Ahh I cant think anymore..

Ok so basically its something like it would be immoral to promote milk powder in developing countries whereas it is perfectly find in developed countries. So in different cultures/societies context.. the moral issues are different. therefore.... we need to balance moral absolutism and moral relativism. haha ok,

i just wanted to blog something about work so i feel less guilty about not doing much today. boo~ and i thought the milk powder example was really interesting~

(anyway nice song =))

haha cute! watch both~

if 15 mins = 900 seconds.. and i got to complete my presentation in 15mins.. i doubt i can say over 900words right?? oh goodness my speech has like 2.4k words now =.=

every time i am studying for exams there will be days i get sick or lazy to go out and study. and everytime i attempt to study at home, i question myself.. why do i keep trying when i fail all the time? =.= another day gone. gg-fied. can i just not strive for all A anymore?

well, just do my best right? i mean... i dont wanna regret not trying either. :(

but now looking at my progress.. its totally bullshit. omg. i need discipline. get someone just sell me some?

random blabber

ayeeeeeee, i wish i am in school right now.
i wish i could just reach school in like 15mins.. but i cant!
gaahhh. i wanna go school study, but ok its abit late now. :(
ahh i seriously should have just went to school just now. boooo~

i wish i have magic, then i can just say hocus pocus focus and finish everything that i NEED to complete!

i wish that i was faster in doing work.

omg i cant believe how unprepared i am this semester =.= OH MY GOD. =.=
omg i need to stop whining! arghhh.
cant someone just write my script for mee?? ok fine NOOO, i know i know.

BLASTERING BARNACLES! FYP SUCKS THE LIFE OUT OF ME!

and i am so going to eat kfc tonight. i already have the craving for like dayss! noboody gonna stop me today! (haha and since when did anyone even tried to stop me. i'm like so drama when i m stress. zzzzzzzzzz and i talk to myself like a billion times more too..........................)

i need to get over myself and do work! stupid me.

haha much as i want this blog to move away from ahnik's whiny blog... it is just so difficult. haha maybe if i didnt delete all my previous posts they could just make a diary of whiny kid series =X

ahhhh, sian, i need to get well! how am i going to get any work done like that boo. a fever seems to be brewing. (fevers brew? i dont know i cant think. hahaha ) :(

^^

haha i never felt so happy being sick before. and its just such a ridiculous feeling. heh.

and gosh did i just realised how messy my house is. my bro's frens came over.. then they were like
"woa what happened? you all preparing for war/tsunami ar? its like messier than ever"
omg shit. yah! T-T ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. argh oh well~

i feel really really extremely awful =( *whines*
my nose is leaking like mad and its hurting my throat so much.
damn.

save the three!

sigh i seriously hate myself. totally unproductive today. =( totally should have gone to school. booo!
ok now there;s nothing else i can do, but hope that i salvage the last 3 hours that i have left! YES NIKKI! SAVE THE TREES THREE!! THE THREE HOURS THAT I HAVE LEFT! =(

and i m getting freaking lame thse days =.=

seriously, the best music, dance performance gives u ultimate goosebumps! :D i dont know why tho. haha

Relativity

someone told me today that we need to learn to look at things in a more relative manner. haha and that we have to fail to be able to learn more. cos if we are always succeed and not fail anything then we arent trying hard enough..(actually i dont agree to this.. some ppl are just geniuses ok.)
anyway cos i was saying, the scary part about research is actually not having results.. he said.. "ahh, but i'm going to live to a 100 years and so are you. what is 4 years of failure in your life?"

4 years.. its still alot to me! but anyway the point is.. yah when you look at everything in a bigger picture, sometimes things doesnt seems to matter that much afterall. but using this logic, small stuff gets extrapolated too.. hmm ok i'm just crapping now.

ok i shd complete my thesis like asap than stuff my brain with weird thoughts and spout nonsense the whole day. wth.

another irony

much as i seemed to be extremely chatty i think i have a serious problem with communication.

to add on to the ironies.. i'm doing ALOT MORE WRITING NOW ELSEWHERE than for my thesis. when my thesis first draft is due.

Ironies in life

There are like tonnes of ironies in life. Well number one on the list is that even though I'm so caught up and amazed by the ironies in life... I can never remember them off the top of my head. Gotcha!

Ok that aside.. I was thinking about some random stuff yesterday about toilet etiquette.

I just don't understand how girls that are seemingly cultured and demure and nice...have bad toilet etiquette. I mean, so you act like this behind closed doors when no one is looking? Like is flushing the toilet so difficult? Is cleaning the toilet seat so difficult? I mean, dont you feel embarrass if someone caught you leaving the toilet cubicle with a mess inside? (ok its not like awful mess mess kind of mess. but still yah.) I was thinking these girls would probably act really feminine and what not.. (ok cos i catch a glimpse of the girl....and I just have issues with pretty girls being a hoax. ok, i know impression management.. and i know i should really start dressing up more professionally because no one is ever going to take me seriously like that. and i just hate the fact that looks matter so much. )

Then, it struck my mind.

What kind of a person is a person with really neat everything else but awful toilet etiquette? What kind of a person is a person with messy tables and everything else but really good toilet etiquette?


And then the more I think about it, the more I feel that I'm a crappy person.
A person full of ironies too, ok this I know.. haha I am a person full of contradictions.
I want but I don't want. understand? This sentence applies to almost in life. haha.

13,000 words ++ and counting.
oh man, how i wish i can keep a copy of my own thesis too.. but its so expensive to print and bind for myself just to keep it at home as a souvenir. but its like.. my own textbook! haha

whines

i wanna watch lion king! =(

and one day i wanna watch opera hahaha. ok shit.
OMG I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY GRAPHS! =(
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I think I'm schizo..

(ok not really)
but, haha i cant seem to write in just ONE style.
I cant seem to discuss my graphs systematically in the same way

i wonder if it feels like i'm discussing my results randomly. plonking random graphs together and stuff. =(

and all of a sudden, i have this huge urge to write something fanciful. or poetic.. using big words or something. some literal work. but then again the lack of profound words in my head is stopping me from doing so... obviously. duh!

omgosh.. i cant finish my thesis today. HOW NOW BROWN COW?
*sniffles, stifles, faints*




stumbled upon this...celion dion! she awesome!
(ok like why on earth did i youtube when i am suppose to chiong work? =( dont ask me.. it befuddles me to. (omg, haha i dont know why, but the word befuddles just hit me..first time using it and i think its correctly used! coolness~ i'm going nuts. i'm like talking to myself on my blog =.=) zzz)

one day i will try to write a song too! :D

she doesnt know! >.<

Blind justice

love the animation. man, they really shd make a anime out of this. actually i think this mv fits alot of animes already. its probably about a pair of twins.. one good one evil? blood +?

somebody save me! :(

i really dun udnerstand why ppl like to compare number of pages rather than number of words! is this a sign of the shallowness like how we compare the outer appearance rather than the character or a person. compare the thickness of a book. judging the book by its cover.

am i overthinking this? hahaha.

i mean, ok, so i wrote 10 pages. what are u gonig to conclude from this? how do u know i have single or double paragraphing. empty pages along the way. 2 graphs and every page.

ok, shit i really shouldbulk up my report more then write about how ppl compare pages then words. zzz.

its smothering me.

我好乱啊！！！

(ok its suppose to mean that i'm confused, not that i'm messy. .though thats kinda true too haha!) flummoxed! in every way, gaah.

i have no idea how to organise my data. there's so much stuff that i cant find for some stupid reason. and i keep getting distracted =.=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6Rc8idptUM

oooo found this on youtube, sounds good!